Peggy, 25F. I love one thing in life and that's rat-like people (please send help). I am very particular in the type of characters I enjoy. If I dislike something there's no reasoning that may change my mind. I'm chill, I don't engage in bullying or fighting. I'm also autistic and may just be awkward. If I somehow made you uncomfortable just let me know and I will try to do what's right. If it's even possible.
CW: non-mc!reader, waitress!reader, fluff, romance, flirting, angst, implied drug use, implied physical abuse (not from Harlequin), cannibalism, murder, slow burn, strangers to friends to lovers, harlequin deserves love too
Summary: The Circus of Horrors comes to town, the screams and laughter of the people drawing in those from far and wide. Including a young woman who works at a local diner, her love for the macabre and theatre alike pushing her forward as she takes her firsts steps into the circus that would change her life forever.
Masterlist
The sounds of the Circus echoed in the distance as you made your way to the entrance, the laughter and screams of the people alike causing your heart to race as you stepped into the line for the ticket booth.
You didn't know why you were so desperate to see this "Circus of Horrors", why you had saved every bit of extra grocery money or tips you had gotten from the diner in hopes of affording a ticket.
Maybe it was your love for the theatre, your fascination with the macabre; or maybe it was your subconscious need to have control of your environment, control of when you wanted to feel fear instead of being forced to feel it every time you went home.
So here you stood, waiting in line to get a ticket while counting each coin you had managed to gather. Your heart racing, nerves gripping at your trembling hands as you watched each person in front of you receive their ticket.
Some gold, some black, and some pink; the difference between them unknown to you. The thought that you might not have enough coming too late as you suddenly found yourself at the from of the line, standing before a tall man with a top hat and a mask of black and white.
"Welcome, visitor."
The man says, his tone trying for polite, professional, with an underline feeling of neutrality as he stared down at you with a critical eye.
"H-Hello, um... may I request the price of your cheapest ticket?"
You ask, trying to remain polite despite the anxiety gripping at your chest as the man paused, taking in your slightly disheveled appearance and the fresh bruise around your right eye with a look of intrigue.
"Our standard golden ticket is five dollars."
He says, his voice calm despite the way he watched you, noticing you tense at the amount.
Nowadays, five dollars would seem a reasonable amount to the working class. However, he could see the way you looked back down at the money in your hands, diligently recounting the amount and flinching when you realize you didn't have enough.
"I... I don't have enough, I'm sorry for wasting your time, sir."
You say, your head hanging with a look of genuine guilt across your face, as if the one minute it took you to ask your question was some huge inconvenience to him.
And usually it would have been, but the way you clutched the money close and turned to leave as if your last bit of hope had been snuffed out... it pulled at the Ticket Taker's heart in a way he refused to acknowledge.
"Just a moment visitor."
The Ticket Taker says, stopping you in your tracks as you turn back to him in confusion.
"Let me see."
He continues, holding out his hand in a silent demand to see your money.
With nothing else to lose, you slowly hand over the money, watching with a growing sense of confusion and anxiety as the man counts each of your coins.
"You are fifty cents short. Luckily for you, I have a special ticket for occasions such as these."
He says, taking your money and in the blink of an eye, producing a dark blue and black ticket with gold lettering.
The sight causing your eyes to widen as you stared at the ticket in awe, its coloring faded with age but clearly well taken care.
"Oh, I-I couldn't! I should be paying full price to enter."
You say, waving your hands, about to explain that you can just pull an extra shift and be back tomorrow to pay full price, only to be interrupted by the man as he held up his hand in a motion of silence.
"Nonsense, these tickets have not been sold in many years and only cost a dollar back then. If anything, you are overpaying."
Ticket Taker says, knowing that if you knew the ticket had actually been free, you would have felt guilty and most likely not taken it.
His words causing you to brighten, that hope returning to your gaze as you slowly reached out to take the offered ticket, cradling it close to your heart as you having him a bright smile.
"Thank you, sir; I really appreciate it."
You say, your words filled with genuine gratitude, causing Bil to pause as he took in the sight before him.
The joy behind your smile and the excitement shining in your gaze beneath the dark bruise reminding him so much of her, that ache in his chest growing despite the way he seemed to soften in the face of your pitiful state and genuine appreciation.
"Of course, this ticket will get you into all of the attractions except the Pink and Black tent, which are out of bounds."
He explains, watching with mild amusement as you quickly nodded your head, diligently thanking him once more and promising to stay to the restrictions of the ticket before finally walking past him.
The scent of blood and despair that had once clung to your form now being overpowered by pure joy as you faded from his view, with Bil not taking his eyes off the ticket in your hand.
A ticket he has not used since she died.
His face devoid of emotion behind his mask despite the way his heart ached as he watched you run off into the throngs of the circus, his ticket your only line of defense against the horrors within.
✦──｡‧˚ʚ𖤐ɞ˚‧｡──✦
Your bright smile remained firmly in place as you made your way through the circus, the dark blue ticket clutched tightly to your chest as you took in the sights of the colorful lights and the smells of sugary sweets and savory foods served in the stands along the way.
It was more then you could have ever dreamed of, the sights, the smells, the people within. Each tent you ventured into leading you deeper and deeper into the throngs of the circus as each performer told a story all their own.
The silent Pierrot and his dance of shadows, twisting them around his form as the lights of the stage shone off the glint of the knifes he threw with effortless precision. While the other audience members reactions were subdued, yours were boisterous, cheering and clapping in amazement as the show came to an end.
Missing the way the Pierrot's eyes widened behind his mask and tracked you as you left his tent.
The Doctor with bodies hanging throughout his tent, who strapped you to a chair and watched on in curiosity and intrigue as you stared upon him with awe instead of terror. Diligently following each of his instructions and taking his medical advice to heart, nodding along as he explained how underweight you were before thanking him for his time when he let you leave.
His eyes watching on behind his bird like mask as you left his tent with a smile upon your lips and a bandage in place where the needle had pierced your skin.
The purple Jester with his stories of love and jealousy as the people on the stage moved to his whims, like puppets upon strings. His words like venom and comfort wrapped into one as he toyed with a fear that was not present within you, the horror you should feel replaced only by awe of his art, of the skill behind his story telling, how his words pulled you in and made you feel for both the Poison and the Angel alike who's love was never meant to be.
All while the Jester watched on from above the stage, his critical gaze not once leaving you as he took in your genuine amazement for his story before you made your leave.
The curious stares of the circus performers and the critical glances of the people around you going unnoticed as you made your way deeper and deeper into the circus, an overwhelming sense of excitement and joy taking hold of you as you ventured further and further within.
Before finally stopping at the final attraction of the night.
A tall tent of black and green, the sound of music within drawing your attention and luring you into it's depths as you made your way inside and found a seat near the front of the stage. The crowd chatting with each other beneath the soft music that played, each of them lost to their own conversations as they waited for the show to start.
Until finally, the lights began to slowly dim; drawing the attention of all, including yourself, to the stage as a spotlight shone down from above.
Illuminating the silhouette of a tall man dressed in black and green, the hat upon his head jingling with each movement as he tilted his head, the smile upon his masked face moving in a way that wasn't quite right. A deadly edge within his toxic green gaze, like a predator looking out upon the prey that had found their way into his den, before he began to move.
The words falling from his lips like silk dipped in poison as he told the story of an angel, a jester and the fool who loved her, a story of love and hunger, of possession and obsession that dragged the angel to far and broke those who lost her. His body moving like a snake ready to strike, each movement captivating the audience and drawing them into his every word.
All while you watched on, your eyes shining as you took in his ethereal form bathed in the lights of the stage as he told his twisted form of the Commedia Dell'arte, a story you had heard many times before.
Your heart beating with each step he took across the stage, your attention never once wavering from him, hanging off each word he uttered.
Before your eyes finally met.
It was only for a moment, a second in time that past in the blink of an eye, but for that single moment... all you both could do was stare.
The green of his eyes less like a poison, and more like the sheen of an emerald held beneath the sun while he stared back at you in turn. Taking in your wide eyes filled with awe hidden beneath the bruising of a black eye, the small smile upon your lips as you watch him perform with a reverence that took his breath away.
Because for that single moment, Harlequin had experienced something he never had before.
The feeling of being the center of someone's whole world, not for his flirtations or what he could offer them, but just for performing for his own satisfaction.
That experience alone lingering with him long after he had looked away, long after his performance had ended, and longer still as he watched you make your way out of his tent, never once taking his eyes off of your retreating form.
✦──｡‧˚ʚ𖤐ɞ˚‧｡──✦
"Well, what a lovely surprise."
The sudden voice startles you out of your awed state, quickly turning around to find yourself face to face with the green Jester who had just finished performing.
The Harlequin.
The smile upon his mask was charming, innocently curious, as if this meeting was just as surprising to him as it was to you. Yet, his eyes hidden beyond the mask were sharp, knowing, as if he was trying to ensnare you with his gaze alone as he leaned into your space.
"How fortunate of me to stumble upon such a fascinating specimen, I've never quite seen a human like you before."
He says, his voice dripping with charm as he took a strand of your hair between his fingers, feeling the texture and the way the unnaturally pale strands swirled around his claws like a flower bending beneath the wind.
All while you stared up at him in surprise.
"Tell me, did you enjoy the show, my dear?"
Harlequin asks, his question snapping you out of your startled daze, shaking your head before giving him a nervous but honest smile.
"Oh yes, it was quite amazing. You truly have a gift for story telling."
You say, your words genuine, filled with a soft wonder and joy fueled by the freedom you felt within the walls of the circus.
The innocence behind your words causing Harlequin's smirk to grow as he trailed his fingers down the strand of your unusual hair.
"Such sweet words and high praise, I may actually believe you with the way you were so enraptured by my performance earlier."
He comments, watching with slight annoyance as your smile only grew, seeming to miss the subtle tease and flirtation behind his words.
"It's true, I've never heard the Commedia Dell'arte told in such a way; and the way you capture and portray the mischievous personality of the Harlequin from the original story is absolutely breathtaking!"
You gush, your words filled with joy and excitement.
All while Harlequin froze in place, his fingers stilling in your hair as he slowly registered your words.
"You... know of the Commedia Dell'arte?"
He asks, his voice devoid of the confident charm from a moment before, leaving only emotionless neutrality in it's place.
"Oh yes, it's one of my favorite stories in literature! Though, I believe I enjoy your version much better. The sorrow, the beauty, the confusion of love and hunger that drives the Harlequin to pursue the beautiful Columbine."
You say, your eyes shining with awe as you think of the story he told, missing the way Harlequin flinched at your words, his fingers trembling where they still held a strand of your hair, all while he stared down at you from behind his mask.
Of course he told the story well, it was his story to tell. After all, he had been there, had lived that very tale, had been the one to tell the original story that would later become the Commedia Dell'arte.
Of course he had portrayed the Harlequin breathtakingly, he himself was the original Harlequin.
And he didn't know weather to be annoyed or furious.
The trembling in his fingers remaining as he tightened his grip on your hair, just enough to be noticeable, before giving you another one of his charming smiles.
This one filled with far more teeth and his eyes a bit sharper as he eyed your pitiful form that he could easily snap in half with a flick of his wrist.
"Ah, a lover of the arts I see... you speak as if you know the message behind such a piece."
He says, his voice teasing, yet holding a subtle threat beneath the thinly veiled charm that went completely unnoticed by you as your smile seemed to soften.
"Perhaps not, but... I always thought it was trying to tell us that Love and Hunger were far more similar then anyone thinks. Hunger is an all consuming force, just like love.
To love in to starve for that persons attention, their joy, their sorrow, their heart as a whole. Making it very easy to confuse the two, because they are much the same. I always thought it was a beautifully macabre depiction of love, hunger and the loss of ones self to emotion."
You explain, smiling brightly as you stare up at him with a purity that made Harlequin's chest ache.
Not because of the words themselves, but because you truly seemed to believe them.
The way you described the emotions behind the story so simply, speaking of love and hunger like they were one in the same. As if it was inevitable to hunger for the one you love... as if you, a mere human, could ever truly understand the emotions behind such things.
As if he hasn't scarred his body and beaten himself for years due to the guilt of choosing his hunger over the love he thought he held for her.
Only for you, a pitiful little freak of a human, to speak such words as if they were fact.
What a delusional and disgustingly relatable way of thinking.
"Do you have any idea what kind of monster calls hunger love?"
He whispers, his words drawing your attention as the air between you both grew tense, concern overtaking your mind as you finally took notice of the strain behind his smile.
The pain behind his eyes beneath the mask he wore, the tremble in his hands as he slowly released your hair, only to take your hand into his own. Holding it tight, not enough to hurt, but enough to feel his presences as he leaned down.
The charming smile upon his mask once more, his eyes hardened in a way you didn't understand as he pressed the lips of his mask against your hand in an imitation of a kiss.
The action holding a lot more meaning then his words of flirtation from moments before.
"What a truly fascinating and beautiful woman you are."
He says, his voice soft in a way that took your breath away before he finally released your hand.
His smile all charm, his eyes shining with a curiosity and intrigue that had not been there moments before, as he finally turned away. A sway to his body and a confidence in his steps that you couldn't hope to achieve as he disappeared beyond the shadows of the tent once more.
Your hand trembling where it pressed against your chest, trying to calm your racing heart as your eyes remaining on the spot the Harlequin once stood.
Before you finally turned away, making your way towards the exit of the circus as the sounds of laughter and screams alike faded into the background. Your night of fantasy and adventure coming to an end as you passed the threshold into the town beyond, back to your normal life filled with endless nights of work, pain and fear.
All while the Circus watched on, the eyes of the Harlequin never once leaving your retreating form, watching the way other humans moved away from you, eyeing your too pale skin and unnatural hair color with a distain and disgust that he had seen directed at himself many times before.
The memory of your genuine awe as you watch his performance and the words you spoke afterwards still lingering in his mind, even when he finally turned away.
Jingles freak circus characters in front of you to talk about perfume~
Did you know Night blooming jasmine isn’t really a jasmine at all and is used more to make a indolic heart note. Its profile is described as thicker, greener and creamy compared to true jasmine. I was poking through my sample box for a friend that needed recommendations and I just wanted to yap.
Speaking of which I have a tip, if you want to find frisky perfume profiles I suggest looking up/for certain terms like indolic, animalic, heady, musky, dirty, and narcotic (all common terms to describe perfume profiles like that) this isn’t a full list just something fun to look out for.
hmm I cant seem to find my old post of my yandere master list, so Im just gonna re upload it ( ꩜ ᯅ ꩜;)
Maya's huge yandere male master list below 🔥🔥
as a long time yandere fan, I have consumed insane amounts of media with yandere males!! and I see a whole lot of people who ask for reccomendations on media with yandere male leads, so here is my master list!
for this list, my definition of a yandere will be a bit loose. this list contains majority yanderes, but may also have characters who are obsessive, lovesick, protective, or yangire! my personal faves have (❤) next to them :3
extra note: many of these series include dark topics, like rape, abuse, incest, pedophilia, etc. if you have any triggers, please read the warnings of the particular media before getting into it.
MINORS DO NOT INTERACT!!!!
animanga:
-A Condition Called Love
-Firefly Wedding (❤)
-Even If I Were To Die, I Wouldn't Choose You
-I Have a Second Chance at Life, so I’ll Pamper My Yandere Boyfriend for a Happy Ending!!
-My Yandere Neighbour
-Omoi Omoi Ai - Jirai Joshi to Yandere Danshi (❤)
-Paperbag-kun is in love
-(sort of) My Next Life as a Villainess: All Routes Lead to Doom! (❤)
-My Beloved Oppressor (❤)
...hentai:
-Tonari no Seki no Hen na Senpai (❤)
-My Broken Vampire (❤)
-I Reincarnated into the Otome Game "KURODORA," but it's IMPOSSIBLE to clear (❤)
-The Sacrificial Maiden Corrupted by Coupling With an Oni
-An Ordinary Girl Obsessed Over By a Downer Deity
-Until the Trashiest Boy Toy Exorcist Ren-kun Crushes Me in His Embrace
-Yandere Ouji ga Shachiku Onna no Watashi o Hanasanai
-I Can't Escape From Mr. Naughty Red Riding Hood
-You're Cutest When You're Pathetic ~Drugged Sex with Co-dependent Chiaki~
-The Demon Gods' Village ~Descendants of Gods x Sacrificial Girl~
-ANYTHING by Umekoppe (❤)
-(K)NIGHT & DAY Until the reverse bird knight you pick up becomes a “male”
-Dekisugi Kon to Dekiai no Kase - Toshishita Konyakusha wa Yandere Sakushi
-The Yakuza Leader's Only Daughter and the Second in Command
-The Sultan's Love
-BORDER LINE ~My Fiendish Chinese Classmate's Psychotic Infatuation~
-The Neighbor in Room 203 Disappeared Leaving their Keys Behind
-Dekiai Osananajimi wa Watashi no Otto de Stalker!?
-Immoral Night
otome games:
-Chou No Doku Hana Awase (❤❤)
-Amnesia: Memories (❤)
-Sympathy Kiss
-Cupid Parasite (❤)
-Hana Awase
-9 R.I.P.
-Diabolik Lovers
-Brothers Conflict
-Dandelion - Wishes Brought to You (❤)
-Nameless ~ The One Thing You Must Recall
-TAISHO X ALICE
-Nightshade
-Psychedelica of the Black Butterfly
-Psychedelica of the Ashen Hawk
-7'Scarlet
-Lunar Maiden, River-Side Angel, and the Godlike Moment
-EPHEMERAL -Fantasy On Dark-
-Trap of MUSK: Europe Night
-Piofiore
mobile/non otome games:
-Love and Deepspace (❤)
-A3! Act! Addict! Actors! (❤)
-I-Chu! (❤)
-Mystic Messenger
-Dangerous Fellows
-What In Hell Is Bad!
-Love Unholyc
-Ikemen Sengoku (❤)
-Ikemen Villains
-Ikemen Revolution
-Ikemen Prince (❤)
-Ikemen Vampire
-Samurai Love Ballad Party
-just about every Genius Inc game
-Paradise Lost
-Blood In Roses
-My Puppy Fiance
indie amare games:
-14 Days With You
-The Kid At The Back (❤)
-My Dear Hatchet Man
-Something's Wrong With Sunny Day Jack (❤)
-Favor (❤)
-Binary Star Hero (❤)
-Criminally Yours
-Boyfriend To Death 2
-Monster X Mediator (❤)
-John Doe
-Your Boyfriend
-Degrees Of Lewdity (❤)
-Sexy Cabin Murder Man (❤)
-Blush Blush
-Lovers Trophy (❤)
-Courtin' Cowboys (❤)
-My Sweet Housemate
-Homicipher
-Online Obsession
-He's Just Away (❤)
-Lurking For Love
-Penetrate The Veil
-Chromatic Agape
-Duality
-Hydrangea
-Perfect Love
-Overtime
-To Eat a God
-The Snake's Taken a Spouse (❤)
-wh4t 1 w0uldnt d0
-Red Phone
-Hopeless Romantic
-Symptoms of Deceit
-Picture Perfect Boyfriend
-Mind Mind Mind
-Yandere Wonderland
-One Night Eternity
-Twisted Carnival
-Colored Gaze
-Picture Perfect
-Please Don't Hate Christmas
-Domestic Dread
-Than Winter Came
books:
-The Collector (❤❤)
JP only:
-Folie Fatale
-https://tinyurl.com/mayasyanmasterlistdoc (the link to my google doc of jp otoges, WIP!!)
tumblr accs that post yandere stories/art/ocs:
(this list does not include the official or creator accs for yandere amare games!)
theartofmadeline
ellievsbear
tangentwithtanner
dededos
titsay
origamiaround
gummygunk
