Where did you go?

Reagan Irene Barlow | Formerly 25 What do you do when you're nothing but a memory?

[monstersgraphic-blog]

You and me and the devil makes three.           ( ft. @preslcys | @irenebarlow | @deceivcrx )

[irenebarlow]

hauntvng:

Marisol took a step back, a loud gasp escaping her lips. So she really wasn’t crazy, there was really a ghost there. “ You’re real. ” The young woman found herself saying, eyes never leaving the girl. “ Pardon me but I just – I didn’t know ghosts were real and you’re there. ” It was becoming a bit repetitive now but Marisol couldn’t help it. “ You are a ghost, right or – -  ” She didn’t dare to say what she was thinking, maybe this was the creature plating another game and she’d just fallen right in its trap. But… she seemed far more phantasmagorical than just a demon trick. 

Reagan wasn’t sure what to make of the girl’s reaction. She hadn’t meant to scare her, and she sure didn’t look frightened; surprised maybe? “I’m…” She trailed off, looking down at her nearly see-through feet. “Yes, you could say I’m a ghost.” Her bottom lip quivered slightly, accepting her state wasn’t exactly the easiest thing, and Reagan had still to come to terms with it. “Should I go or….?”

[irenebarlow]

preslcys:

He knew she was going to say no, it was most likely that she’ll deny the offer. Any other time he would’ve been grateful for that but any other time other ghosts would’ve taken the offer first hand. And while he should just let it be he didn’t want to, it was her. It was Reagan the love of his life, the person he was supposed to spend the rest of his life with. He just couldn’t let her hurt, even after dead he couldn’t. Maybe he’d been naive when she was alive, maybe he didn’t see what was happening and going on with her that drove her to what happened. He didn’t see her hurting then and he had to live with that but now? Now he could do something about it.

“ If it isn’t you, it’ll be something else. ” Ryker said while he sat down on his bed, he was determined on doing this. He wanted to make her understand that this would be for the better. That he was okay with it. Honestly he didn’t mind as long as she was freed from any suffering. Ryker couldn’t bare to see her go through something like she just had ever again. No one should. Specially not Reagan. She was deserving of everything good and of a better place than being stuck between the dead and the living. “ It hurts me already to see you like that, Reagan please. I beg you, let me. ”

He might sound desperate and maybe he was but he needed to o this. For her, to free her from the pain. At least for a while. Besides Ryker didn’t want to turn her into one of those deranged ghosts, he knew that was what mostly happened to those who didn’t pass on and he was at best a vaccine against that. In its own messed up way. Ryker looked up at her then in a rather dramatic manner. A look of hurt across his face for a moment, how could she ask something like that. He understood if she was curious but she should know better. “ It took me almost thirty years to find the perfect woman. ” Ryker had adverted his gaze then, face in his hands by now and his voice barely more than a muffled sound. “ Do you really believe I’ll find someone so soon? ” 

He wanted to tell her he’d never find someone like her, that he’d never find someone else, period. She’d been the love of his life, the perfect one, the one that drew his demons away - no one else would ever compare. He wouldn’t be able to find someone else now or ever but he didn’t say it instead, “ It’s always been you. Even if you left me… Even after you’re truly gone. It’ll always be you. ”

The time spent by her grave had been so long, so long and lonely. She thought no one else could ever see her again and for almost two months, she stood there, trying to figure out how to go back into her body, wake herself up. And with those thoughts, she’d been too busy to realize it was the first time in eight years when she was truly alone. The demon was gone, she was dead and there was no one around that could see her. Every time her parents came by the grave, she’d try to apologize for their pain, for what she’d caused them, and all to no avail. Nothing would make it better. Like nothing would make her heartache better, especially not hurting him again.

Reagan shook her head again, “No, Ryker. I don’t want to hurt you.” She whispered, letting her feet carry her over to him. They weren’t really touching the ground anymore, or pretending to touch the ground until she noticed when she stood before him. God, she just wanted to touch him, just one more time. Once, and she’d be happy by knowing she could do this again. She could take away all his worries with just one touch when she was alive and now…. Now she couldn’t do anything of the sort. “I can’t hurt you again, my love. This wasn’t supposed to happen this way.”

Nothing was supposed to happen the way it did. Irene was supposed to get better, after eight years of having that thing haunting her, she was ready to look for help, for someone to help her get rid of it and then… Then they could get married, start a family, be happy together. This wasn’t the way their story was supposed to end. Not so soon, so prematurely. Before they had any chance at being happy, it had been taken away from them, everything had ended for the two of them, but still, there she was. Standing before him as a ghost. A memory of what she’d truly been. His words hit her so strongly, a sob passed her lips, weightless tears running down her cheeks and disappearing into thin air.

How could it hurt so much when she was already dead? “I don’t—You can’t love me forever, Ryker.” She choked out, her hand running through his hair gently. It was the smallest of touches, but one that brought so much relief to her she nearly collapsed before him. She’d be gone one day, this time for real, but something had changed and she was happy with whatever time she had left of this. “Ryker,” Irene breathed, pushing his hands away from his face to take his face in her hands. “Look at me, you can’t hold onto my memory forever. I—I love you with all of me. But you… you deserve someone else who can make you happy. There’ll be someone else, someday.” As much as the thought hurt, it was meant to happen. She couldn’t bear the thought of him mourning over her for the rest of his life.

[captainheroism]

[hauntvng]

 @irenebarlow

Marisol kept staring at the same wall she’d seen the girl walk into. For a moment Marisol had thought the girl would walk straight to it for maybe not paying attention where she’d been going but no, that wasn’t the case. The girl simply had walked right through the wall leaving Marisol wondering if she’d finally gone mad. “ Hello? ” After a while she called out, maybe she had gone completely crazy but that wouldn’t change her status of the looney in town so she might as well make sure this wasn’t real. “ Please if you’re real come back. ”

[irenebarlow]

Reagan had been particularly bored once Ryker left for work. She couldn’t follow him there of all places. They’d think he was insane, talking to a wall, and as much as she would have loved to watch him do whatever, she didn’t want to bother him through the day. Turned out being dead was a great deal boring, and as she wandered into people’s apartments, it was easy to find a source of entertainment in watching other people do normal things. None of them had noticed her and as she walked right through a wall to find someone staring at her, she took a quick step back. Going through walls wasn’t exactly her favorite thing to do, it just proved that she was dead even more. As the girl called out to her, Reagan peeked through the wall once more, a soft sigh passing her lips as she stepped right back into her place. “I didn’t mean to intrude, really, I was just… bored.”

[451seconds]

You deserve better,” he whispers, staring at his hands. “That’s what you don’t get,” she says, and she's exasperated. “I don’t care if I deserve better, because I want you.“  He lifts his head. She takes his hand. “There is nothing better than you.

H.L. // excerpt from a book I’ll never write #12 (via fitzsimmonsofrp)

[hellish-daddy]

[irenebarlow]

judexmercer:

Jude’s smile couldn’t possibly get bigger when she pointed out the garden, “Yeah, I think so. It’s taken a while thanks to the weather, but I mean…all things considering, this is the best I’ve gotten it so far.”

“The weather?” Reagan trailed off, looking up to the sky. It was sunny, but then again, she hadn’t really noticed the weather ever since she… died. “It’s nice today, isn’t it?” She asked suddenly, turning towards the man. “How long have you been working on it?” Despite her not being able to damage the flowers, she moved to stand by his side.

[irenebarlow]

preslcys:

I never meant to. They rang on his head as he simply sat there. He felt something ease into him, like he was right all along all those months ago by telling everyone she would never do such thing even if at times he didn’t believe so himself. But for some reason he couldn’t believe her entirely. What had happened wasn’t normal. He knew that but there were too many things surrounding her death that it made it impossible for him to believe that she didn’t mean to. That maybe someone else had done it. Something else. But maybe she didn’t even mean it that way. Maybe she just regretted it now that she was dead and stuck between the realms of the living and the dead.

“ I can … ” What could he do? He could help her pass on, that would make the pain stop. That would make whatever was going on with her right now stop forever and she’d be at ease. Resting, in a place of nothingness but she wouldn’t be hurting. That would be the right thing to do, the option he should grant her, really. But Ryker was selfish. Despite being angry, despite hating the fact that she left that way. He didn’t want her to leave again. Not yet. He’d missed her so much he couldn’t dare to imagine another day without her and now that she was here. Even as a ghost, he didn’t want to let her go. He wouldn’t.

A sob left his lips as soon as her hand went right through his chest. He hated this, he never thought he’d say it but he hated it. When ghosts tried to come in contact with him, most of them being weak. Ryker loved the fact that none could really reach him but now that it was his girlfriend. The ghost of his dead girlfriend, he hated that she couldn’t touch him, that he couldn’t hold her hand and pull her close in a hug. To caress her hair like he used to when she was alive. This only made the man wished he was dreaming and she was not a ghost. Because at least in his dreams, there she was real. Tangible. Here she was nothing.

The words were like needles to him and he couldn’t bare to hear them anymore. But Ryker couldn’t dare to push her away either. He’d missed her too much to sent her away even for a while for a slight moment of peace and quiet. He stood up instead, turning away from her while he finally gave an answer to her previous question. “ I don’t only see the dead, love. I can help them – - I help them ease the pain. ” Without having to pass on, he thought but refused to say. Ryker was determined to keep her around for a while longer. Even if it meant he had to do one of the things he disliked the most.

“ I can work as a host. ” He didn’t really want to say more, because some part of him; the still sane part ( despite his life being one big paranormal chaos ) knew this would hurt like a bitch. But if he wanted to keep her around, he would do this to keep her from suffering any more than she already was. “ You’ll feel at ease and I… I’ll take your pain. ” He said lastly, back turned to her, afraid he’d finally crumble down if he looked at her another second.

Reagan had spent weeks trying to wake up inside her body, but try as she might it wouldn’t work. Her soul no longer belonged inside it and she didn’t belong in this world anymore. But there was no way to leave, and even if she wanted to, seeing Ryker again lifted a weight off her shoulders. She wanted to hug herself to him, have his arms wrapped around her and have her tell her everything was okay. Yet the truth was, nothing was okay anymore. Nothing would ever be okay, because she was supposed to be gone forever. Wasn’t suffering supposed to stop once you died? The pain that racked through her chest as she watched him walk away was nothing like the eternal bliss she was once promised through her acts. Then again, had it really been the demon that did it?

A host. Her eyebrows furrowed curiously, before she took a step back. “No.” She shook her head. Irene refused to let him take her pain, she refused to make him suffer anymore than she already had, though unintentionally. Her feet carried her over to him, standing behind him quietly as she reached over once more, only to stop herself short. What was the use? Try as she might, it was impossible to touch him again, to feel his warmth and ease every single worry of his with just one touch. “I don’t want you to be in pain anymore,” She sighed, letting her gaze fall to her feet.

She hadn’t realized before, but that was what she missed the most. The smile he’d share with her once their gazes met, a private moment built for the two of them only. How he’d get lost in his thoughts, only to be brought back with a single touch and she knew he was with her again. But secrets, secrets had led her to this place, stuck between two realms that weren’t supposed to mix and yet they had. Both with the demon tormenting her, and now, with her there and who knew how many other ghosts haunted him. Reagan didn’t want to be one of those, she didn’t want to bring him pain, but perhaps selfishly, she never wanted to leave his side… They were supposed to grow old together.

“Do you…” Reagan started, her gaze still stuck on the floor beneath her feet. “Have you found someone else yet?” The question left her lips in a whisper. Perhaps not the most important thing to be asking, but one that haunted her almost as badly as the thought of facing her demon again. Ryker was allowed to move on, he was allowed to love someone else now that only he remained. But the intensity of her emotions was unexpected, her chest feeling suddenly caved in as she looked up at him. He should move on, but Reagan didn’t want him to. She wasn’t completely gone after all, was she?

[mau-archive]

Name → Reagan Irene Barlow

Age → Formerly Twenty-Five

Species → Ghost

Occupation → None

Neighborhood → Prymont

Personality Traits →  caring, intuitive, protective

Personality Traits → dead, reminiscent, secretive

Face Claim → Kaya Scodelario

Reagan Barlow, the picture of grace and beauty, the pastor’s daughter whose upbringing was nothing but perfect. She was taught to be caring, compassionate and most of all to respect and love God above all things. But destiny had other plans for her. At the age of fifteen, Reagan saw it for the first time. It was only a shadow at first, in the corner of her room, darker than the darkness surrounding it. The air in her room was chilly, extremely so, having a shiver run down her spine despite her turning away from it and trying to ignore it as much as possible. Day after day, she got on with her life, trying to ignore the ever-lurking dark presence.

It took years before something happened. In the middle of the night, the dark presence showed exactly what it was capable of doing. It started with a simple creak on her floor, and before she knew it, she was thrown against the wall, a piercing scream leaving her lips but one that no one heard. The nightmare didn’t end there though, it was only beginning. It went from small things like tugging at her blankets, something like claws running through her hair, a whisper by her ear to bigger things; scratches on her arms and back, physical torture that left her staying in bed for days on end.

Her father barely noticed the change, always busy tending to the church, to the people and the town, whatever they required from him, he was there for them. And perhaps that made the demon stay longer, that made her understand why it was there. She tried her best to not let it show anymore, to not be a burden on her family when she could carry this on her own. If there was anything Reagan could do, it was survive whatever life threw her way. Even a demon.

She was wrong, of course, but there was one good thing that happened before death took her. Or rather, before the demon got his hands on her. Ryker Presley, the boy with sad eyes who was bound to stir more trouble than he was to do any good, at least, that’s what everyone thought. But he was the one who took away all of her worries, even the demon quieted when she was around him. Not all the time though, at times it kept telling her he’d die to, just like everything else she loved, just like she would if she didn’t give in. Of course, it’s threats chilled her to the bones, but somehow, he didn’t notice, no one noticed. But she was happy with Ryker, she had what she wanted with him; a future.

Except that future was cut short two years after having met him. The threats had gotten louder, the demon wanted her body and wouldn’t stop until it had it. Either it did or she would die, and she did. She saw it for the first time that night, it’s horrid eyes staring into her soul as they wrapped her neck on a blanket. Her begging was useless, tears ran down her cheeks as she watched herself being pulled up on her bedroom’s mirror. It didn’t take long for her to take her last gasp of breath. But she didn’t leave. Her soul was stuck somewhere in between, not really beyond, yet not really in the real world either. Days passed in a blur, her funeral, the cries of her loved ones and the worst part was knowing they thought she took her life. She tried telling them, yelling at them that she didn’t do it, but no one would listen. No one could see her.

She stood by her grave for days on end, willing herself to go back to her body, to wake up, but nothing would happen. Try as she might to enter her body, but nothing would work. Nothing would bring her back to life. She didn’t know how much time had passed before she left that place again with one goal in mind. Reagan had to find the one person who had shown her how happy she could be. Even if he couldn’t see her, even if she would never talk to him again or touch him or… anything. But she’d been wrong, like about many things before. The moment he walked in, Reagan couldn’t help the warm feeling spreading through her. He looked as handsome as ever, though the deep frown on his eyebrows spoke of something bothering him, sadness clouded his eyes and as he caught hers, both of them froze in place. He could see her, and now she had to make him see, she would’ve never killed herself.

[archirenaux]

[preslcys]

nierps:

And While We Were Here (2012)

@irenebarlow​

[irenebarlow]

preslcys:

He hadn’t thought about that, not as much as he should have though. Why hadn’t he seen her at the funeral? It was more simple than anything; “ Because you were still there. ” It wouldn’t be easy to understand and if Ryker gave too much thought to it he wouldn’t understand it either. Because she was also here. But it was different, she wasn’t human anymore and she wasn’t here like she’d been back at her funeral. As soon as she’d been put away everything came back and maybe he would’ve seen her if he payed attention. But Ryker hadn’t even stayed around to pack his things and leave, much less to wait for her ghost to appear to him.

“ You left me… why did you leave me? ” His words died out though, echoing through what would appeared to anyone else as an empty room. His gaze was down and away from the other because the peace and ease he’d felt moments ago were gone, replaced by that anger. Unfair anger that made him feel selfish if nothing else. There was silence for a moment and for just a second Ryker thought that she was gone. Just like that she’d left him before. But she wasn’t, she was there and something terrible was happening to her. Ryker couldn’t explain it and understand it, he’d never seen something like this before and it terrified him. Not only because it was haunting but her - she was hurting and he didn’t understand how that could be possible. She was dead, the dead at best felt undying anger. Never something like this.

He wanted to help her, take a hold of Irene and bring her back to him. Hold her until everything was right again but he couldn’t, he knew better than that. He could never touch her again or help her in any way. Ryker simply stood there as he saw something taking hold of her and it only took him a while to realize what was happening and he wanted more than ever to be able to help her. To be able to grant her ease but Ryker couldn’t, all the man could do was stare as everything played out before she was falling to the floor and Ryker was in an instant next to her. Hand placed on what could’ve be her shoulder only it didn’t and all he could do was sit next to her, hear her suffer and that was it for him. “ I can make it stop. ” It wasn’t ideal for him to do so, but if he had it in him, Ryker would do even the impossible to make it stop hurting for her. Even if it meant hurting him. 

She didn’t understand how this could happen. Every day, at the same hour, it happened all over again. Reagan was officially dead, and yet everyday she relived her death, the pain, the desperation of having her life ripped from her hands and being incapable of doing anything about it. She was powerless against the demon, just like she was powerless when the moment came. Eternal bliss would be a blessing, but one that wasn’t bestowed upon her, one that she hadn’t been granted with despite dedicating most of her life to doing good. What had she done wrong that left her stuck there? Why couldn’t she move on like everyone else was supposed to?

Her teary gaze met his as she caught her breath, his words registering minutes after he’d said them. “I didn’t leave you, I never—” She cut herself off, a sob passing her lips as guilt racked heavily through her. “At the funeral, I tried, but no one would listen. I was there, and no one could see me.” She hadn’t known what that meant then, not until she looked into the coffin in the center of the room. Her family grief stricken when they couldn’t even give her a proper burial because they all thought she had taken her own life. They should’ve known better. And even as a spirit, as a ghost, she wasn’t capable of saying what had truly happened.

“What does that mean?” Reagan muttered, moving away as a sudden chill ran through her. He could make it stop, but what? Everything that held her here was a mystery to her. But if everything stopped, if whatever kept her here just vanished, then she would never see Ryker again, she would be truly gone and forgotten. “How?” This moment didn’t go exactly as she envisioned, if there was anything of the sort before he’d actually seen her. If she was only able to materialize herself, to give him that hug he so badly needed, to feel his hands on her once more and get rid of the eternal cold that haunted her. Then things would be a little better.

“You’re the only person I could think of, Ryker.” She breathed suddenly, reaching over to him again. Her hand seemed solid enough to her, but the moment she touched his chest, it went right through him, making her wince as she slowly pulled her hand back. He was the only thing in her mind as the demon took away her life and with it, her future with Ryker. Her mouth opened and closed, no sound coming from it when she tried to tell him what had happened. Finally giving a resigned sigh, she shook her head. “I’m sorry for dying, I never meant to.”

[irenebarlow]

preslcys:

A dry chuckle left his lips and just as well tears fell. How was he not supposed to cry? He was just seeing her after months of not having her around. Yeah, they might be in some way sad tears - she was dead after all. But he was really, really happy to see her face and hear her speak. Even if he couldn’t hold her. Even if she was just a ghost. One more of the crowd he dealt with. Ryker had heard other talk about similar things before they appeared back in the world as ghosts so it wasn’t really a surprise to hear her say she never left, but there had been people who talked about the white light at the end of the tunnel. He wondered why hadn’t she seen that? Why was she back? - not like he was complaining. But out of everyone he knew, the least person he thought would be back was her. It honestly didn’t made sense to him. 

He wanted to ask more, as to why she was here of all places. People usually stuck to a single place, most of the times where the places they’ve died but Ryker was far away from where she had perished. Also that way he could avoid the question he’d known was coming almost from the moment he saw her standing there. But it would be better if he simply tell her about it now. After all, he spent two years keeping it a secret. If she was going to haunt him the rest of her afterlife - or the rest of his life, he might as well tell her. “ I just can. ” The words were followed by a shrug of his shoulder. Finally walking further into the room and sitting down on his bed. “ I had always been able to see things that are not really there. ” He felt almost like a child confessing to doing something wrong. But it wasn’t like he’d done anything wrong, not really. He just didn’t expect to have to tell her about this ever. Specially not in a moment like this. 

“ Why are you back? – why are you here? ”

A frown etched itself between her brows, as she stared after him. He could always see things that weren’t really there? Was she not truly there then? No, that wasn’t the case. Reagan knew as well as day that she was there, that she never left. If anything, she shouldn’t be feeling any pain or suffering after having died. Perhaps this was her own personal hell, a world where she couldn’t truly be with him anymore. A world where she’d have to watch him move on and forget about her completely in one way or another. Her hand pressed against her chest, willing the pain away even though the thought still remained. One day, he’d have to move on.

“You couldn’t see me before,” She whispered, feeling herself fade a little. “At the… funeral.” The word passed her lips and left an odd feeling behind it. Like accepting she had truly died would have her disappearing completely, but there was nothing. No chorus of angels, no tunnel with a light in the end, nothing. She didn’t understand though, she’d been good all her life, had she not? Even dealing with a demon all on her own so to not burden anyone. For two years, he couldn’t figure out the one thing that was wrong about her, nor could anyone else. She shook her head, moving over to stand before him. Her hand reached out towards him, tempted to run her fingers through his hair like she used to do when she was alive. Reagan pulled her hand back, holding it against her chest once more while the other held her wrist. She couldn’t touch him anymore.

“I don’t… know,” Irene breathed shakily, taking a step away from him as tears welled up in her eyes. “I don’t know. I don’t know.” Memories of her last moments flooded her mind, tormenting her. She didn’t do it, she would’ve never taken her own life, but as the scene replayed in her head, suddenly she wasn’t so sure anymore. Reagan remembered the terror, the darkness slowly surrounding her as her gasps for breath didn’t reach her lungs, and then she was gone. It was over and she was falling to the ground soundlessly, tears flowing down her cheeks as she covered her face with her hands. “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry…” She sobbed into her hands, shaking her head uselessly.

[hyunmuti]

eternally yours - motionless in white

[irenebarlow]

preslcys:

As if her voice broke through all the confusion and fear he’d been feeling lately, Ryker immediately relaxed. Maybe he was going crazy - finally after everything he’d seen and experienced, and  honestly he wouldn’t mind if he was. Her question though made him realized - remember how he’d hidden his ability / curse from her. It only then dawned on him that maybe she was real, as real as you could be by being dead. But real nevertheless and not just a fraction of his imagination. 

Ryker didn’t flinch away, if anything he leaned to her touch. As much as he could but not even the grasp of her fingers could be felt. Though he stayed like that, hoping that if he didn’t move he’d be able to feel her, touch her, hug her. Never let her go. But Ryker knew that wouldn’t be possible, he’d been in similar situations before and never once were ghosts able to be tangible enough to the human touch and even him with his own abilities wasn’t able to do so. “ More than you think. ” He finally spoke, voice breaking ever so slightly as he tried as he might to mimic her smile but it only ended with his lower lip quavering and tears feeling up his eyes, blurring the look of her for a second. “ How are you back? ” Ryker knew the damn answer to that, but he wanted to hear her say it – that she was here. A ghost but that she was here and wasn’t really a fraction of his mind.

“No,” Reagan let out, the quiver to his lower lip tugging at her heartstrings. He wasn’t supposed to cry, he was supposed to be happy to see her. He could see her, but how? Everyone else she’d tried to communicate with always ended up going right through her, ignoring her existence completely. They couldn’t see her, no matter how much they had loved while she lived, but Ryker could. She was real, as real as a ghost could be, though the word was not something she liked using for herself. “Don’t cry, please.”

His question had her pulling her hand away, the lack of a feeling there only confirming what she’d known all along. She was dead, and there was no coming back from that. Her body was stuck six feet underground and that’s where it’ll stay for the rest of eternity. “I never left.” She replied simply, moving to pace around his room. “People always said there was a light at the end of the tunnel when you died, but there wasn’t. It was all darkness, and then…” She trailed off, looking back at him with a small smile. “I’m here.” Deliberately, she left off the amount of times she’d tried to wake up inside her body, how she’d seen it begin decaying inside a coffin and how the demon was no longer after her, at least not the same way it had been before. “How can you see me?”

[thelovejournals]

Please, consider me a dream.

Franz Kafka

[preslcys]

— Availability: Closed — Timeline: The late 2022′s — With: @irenebarlow

It had been two months, fourteen days and sixteen hours since she’d died. Maybe not that exact time but pretty close to it. It hadn’t even been so long and Ryker was already losing count of long it had passed. He hated himself for that, after bowing to never forget about her, Ryker was already forgetting even the days of long she’d been gone. The man had been sad, destroyed after her death of course – but he was also angry. Some part with himself for not noticing something was wrong, but mostly with her. Because she left him,  she just left him all alone to deal with the dead again and he was just being selfish, he knew. But that’s how he felt, she left him alone and scared. Though a part of him believed that maybe she hadn’t done that, that she was murdered and made look like a suicide but Reagan had no enemies. No one who could possibly harm her. And maybe he was just looking too much into it but Ryker didn’t just wanted to accept the fact that she would do such thing. It wasn’t right. His endless mental rants came to a stop as soon as he walked back into his motel room. For a moment, just a brief second he felt at ease. Just as he had when she was alive but it was quickly replaced by anguish and confusion. He took a step into the room and stopped. The door was already closed behind him but the man was so close to turning around and running away. Because he must’ve been going crazy, that was it. The ghost of his dead girlfriend wasn’t just standing there, he refused to believe so. Not that he’ll deny and say he’d wished for her to have come back sooner. But it had been months already, and it just didn’t work this way. She couldn’t be here now.

[irenebarlow]

Time wasn’t a thing she kept anymore. It passed her by and forgot completely about her existence, about her. Everyone eventually would, she was sure, she’d be nothing but a distant memory to those she loved and those who loved her. Not one person though, he wouldn’t forget her, would he? The thought of him alone brought her to an unknown place, a motel room littered with random objects of clothing she recognized too well. They were his, but as she tried to pick one up, her hand went right through it, a gasp escaping her lips as she pulled her hand back. She’d been dead for long enough now that she knew that would happen, and still the feeling of not really being there had something odd washing over her. Like the feeling of her blood running cold, but even that was impossible for a ghost. She turned around as the door opened behind her, a smile immediately pulling at the corners of her lips as she saw him standing there. Ryker looked as gorgeous as ever, though the lines etched around his eyes, the frown between his eyebrows spoke of an unhappiness he couldn’t wave away. One that vanished quickly as his gaze met hers.

For a second, only a second, Reagan thought he was looking through her instead of at her, but a quick glance behind her corrected her. “You… can see me?” She breathed, a second later standing before him. Her hand wouldn’t be able to touch him, and still she reached over to caress his cheek, feeling nothing at all though she remembered what he felt like, and that was enough. “Hello, sad boy. You look like you need a hug.” Her lips quirked into a smile, the tease falling easily from her lips. “Again.”