[irritatedrhythm]

Boundaries and introduction. As if anyone fucking reads them.

I am a cardiophile who enjoys light and dark cardiophilia with an appreciation for the aesthetic of human anatomy. Bones and organs just look incredibly pleasing to my eye. I am physically thin, relatively active where I can manage with an easily irritated and frequently irregular heart. I prefer and heavily enjoy darker cardiophilia activities as well as medically plausible fiction. I have depression, I know people hate depressed people expressing themselves and that's why I keep it on my blog. Block if you want, depressed people are usually viewed as a burden and net negative if they don't hide their thoughts from everyone. Don't tell me not to do what I do, there is no reason to "help" someone hopeless just to help your ego.

What I'm okay with in asks/comments/interaction: Gore, dark cardiophilia fiction (limits heavily apply for sexual content), suggestions for future content (no videos publicly shared), discussion of general medical malpractice fiction, needles, electricity, resus, dark medical experiments.

What I am not okay with on my blog: interaction with ANYONE under the age of 18 (Minors DNI), scat, piss, feederism, ANY FORM OF ANIMAL ABUSE, overtly sexual comments, demands for videos/pictures, identifying me across platforms (creepy and stalkery), unsolicited images of any kind sexual or otherwise,

I will share shortened audio recordings of my heart on this blog and reblog what I find particularly interesting. If you do not like it, block me. I will be blocking blogs without content or meaningful interaction, they offer nothing but notification spam in my view. I don't trust anyone easily and I know that you all dislike depressed people while saying the opposite. Seen you describe them as "depressed piece of shit" and agree that they should be filtered out of any space so don't pretend otherwise. I know nobody actually likes people like me, just the occasional interesting post.

[irritatedrhythm]

Maybe tonight, I could do it tonight. I'm already ill from the first try, it won't take much. Everyone benefits. They admit as much.

[irritatedrhythm]

All liking a post with the caption "15 year old heartbeat". I really don't think that's responsible and will be blocking people who like or post this stuff.

[irritatedrhythm]

Why do I keep getting random fresh accounts claiming to be early twenties perverts follow me while making a billion reblogs of anything in the community only to delete their account within the hour? They almost always have a description where they 'want DMs' and don't follow the format of a typical bot. Especially with the spam in cardiophile tags. Maybe cheaply run accounts scouring for victims?

If anyone else gets this, with how quick the accounts are removed, I would advise against interacting and recommend blocking. Accounts like that are usually scam/spam/blackmail accounts looking for victims.

[irritatedrhythm]

Again? Really? This must be the fourth or fifth time by now.

[irritatedrhythm]

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It hurts but it's satisfying and intriguing. The only way to cope for me. We'll see if it recovers.

[irritatedrhythm]

This person explicitly said the opposite to me, repeatedly only to agree with the exact things I said through someone else in public.

If that isn't blatant hypocrisy then I don't know what is. Even used the phrases I use like "net negative" and how depressed people aren't normal and we deserve no blog to write our feelings down. The support for tags that have automated instant bans upon the first report with no review showing that they want depressed people terminated from here. I hate how disingenuous this person chose to be, pretending that she didn't directly say that all of those things are right despite saying repeatedly in no uncertain terms that they aren't. Why say what you don't mean while repeatly claiming that it's truth? You do believe that depressed people are a net negative, it's right there in plain English that you agree on that. As well as that they make others feel icky for the existence of depressed people having their own thoughts on their own blog. Agreeing with the term of icky to describe depression and agreeing that they aren't normal people. Agreeing that they should be filtered for easy banning when you know from experience that these types of tags get auto banned frequently. Agreeing that depressed people airing their own thoughts on their own blog negatively affects everyone and they should be terminated through those autobannable tags too. Yet you pretend that saying that it's right somehow isn't lying to me and possibly others after repeatedly saying the opposite to them in private chats?

Refusing to address it when I called out that exactly that would happen and that I knew that you actually agreed with it. In response you called me stupid, multiple times, despite it being right there on your public blog that you agreed.

[irritatedrhythm]

And no matter what they say, the typical principles remain that they all agree that you're a burden and a net negative. They'll lie to your face then publicly go "you're so right" to things they claimed the exact opposite of because they are as predictable as you initially worried.

[irritatedrhythm]

Why do I keep getting random fresh accounts claiming to be early twenties perverts follow me while making a billion reblogs of anything in the community only to delete their account within the hour? They almost always have a description where they 'want DMs' and don't follow the format of a typical bot. Especially with the spam in cardiophile tags. Maybe cheaply run accounts scouring for victims?

If anyone else gets this, with how quick the accounts are removed, I would advise against interacting and recommend blocking. Accounts like that are usually scam/spam/blackmail accounts looking for victims.

[irritatedrhythm]

"I'm a very anxious overthinker so this was just the confirmation for everything i already thought abt myself, but getting blocked?? For not being mad at someone telling me to seek help or stfu just was the final straw. But thank you two<33"

It was for the repeated lying in DMs then publicly saying the complete opposite and agreeing that depressed people expressing themselves is icky as well as ruins everyone's mood. Why lie to people in DMs calling them stupid for believing that depressed people's expressions are a burden to express only to publicly agree that they should be removed through automoderated tags, that they ruin everyone's mood and are 'icky' for their mental challenges?

Winds me up, disagreeing with someone over and over saying that they should express themselves and that they aren't dragging everyone down or being a burden only to then say the complete opposite. To further claim it's unreasonable that someone is upset about repeated lying and mocking them for actually being a burden due to expressing signs of depression is not something you do unless you want to filter out those people.

The complete 180° of shared beliefs and the idea that a depressed person expressing themselves makes them a "depressed piece of shit" according to their tags is only done if you heavily dislike people who express the very things you agree are a burden to everyone that should be filtered/banned.

[irritatedrhythm]

The annoyance when someone omits the reasons why they were shunned to try to make others look unreasonable like they didn't say things repeatedly to one person to lie and invalidate what they know only to turn around and say the opposite to everyone else just to make them feel shitty.

Especially agreeing that a major part of their personality is "icky" and that it upsets everyone around them after repeatedly lying to them to encourage them to talk despite you believing that's wrong. Telling someone they're wrong and they aren't a problem only to publicly go on blast about how they and everyone like them are problematic is not something that can't be avoided.

It's actually really easy not to do that by being honest about what you think of the person beforehand, especially when they explicitly say that they believe you think that. It's the repeated lying to their face that will upset people.

[irritatedrhythm]

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Those people that say they don't mind your depressive personality?

They know it affects everyone around you, you make them feel worse. It's your fault alone. They won't say it to your face, unless maybe if they're anonymous, but they all think it. Every thought you have harms the mental state of those around you and you are the one responsible. You shouldn't be allowed to express any part of it in public, let alone a private blog. I like how you look, the other stuff you talk or post about. It's great, so why aren't you? That bit of your personality you fail to remove is unwanted. If you can't remove it then you should be removed. What if someone sees that? Mental illness is icky. You should censor yourself, maybe tag everything in a way that makes it an easy termination target so they can filter you out.

[irritatedrhythm]

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Wouldn't it be nice to know how healthy it is... or isn't? Won't be examined any time soon, so it's all just guesswork unfortunately.

Would be great to drop dead from this soon while nice and comfortable.

[heartcondltion-deactivated20260]

Heyyy…

this is p awkward to ask but is there possibly a way for you to tag when you’re being self deprecating or like suicidal on main?

I love your blog, your aesthetic, and your personality, and we’ve been mutuals for a while now…

but the way you promote a very hyper-depressed image like it’s completely normal makes me feel… icky?

I would love to still be able to interact/follow you but it’s I’m finding that it’s becoming harder and harder to scroll through your blog as you seem to continue to spiral with no support…

and if I’m being truly honest, it’s incredibly difficult to witness someone I care about go through so much…

and it definitely has a net negative effect on my own mental wellbeing.

though I’m not qualified to actually help, I would love to chat, or your can always reach out and text someone on a crisis line?

I definitely understand if you tell me to fuck off, or to go deconstruct what gives me the right to request this, etc., bc I know I’m hypersensitive and easily triggered…

but at the same time, I want you to know that these type of posts not only influence how your followers think, but also how your brain is trained to think.

hii<3

No you’re right, i did use to tag them and then i just stopped bc it felt like everything was just thjs. I’m really sorry if that influenced or affected you or anyone in any way negatively.

I use this blog to just, yk, spill them all out and get them out of my brain to stop spiraling and most things end up in drafts anyway, but i’ll be more careful and i’ll tag those from now on.

[irritatedrhythm]

Hyper-depressed people should definitely use recognised and silently moderated tags that tumblr frequently terminates people with just for ruminating on their thoughts. Thoughts not deemed normal and considered self deprecating are icky, their blogs should be easier targets because I decide I only appreciate a small part of a person while finding other parts inherently icky.

Literally saying "I totally like you, except you make everyone and yourself feel worse because your personality has something I hate so shut your mouth or get it filtered/terminated. I also won't say this outside of anon because I don't respect shit all."

Agreeing with it and deciding that censorship of depressed people's small outlets is especially gross after falsely implying to depressed people that they can talk freely to help them. If you believe that harmless mentally ill people should be tagged for censorship and that they ruin everyone's mental state then you should distance yourself from them. Don't interact with them if you believe they make everything worse by freely speaking about their troubles on a small blog which you choose to look at.

Further gross is pretending as if you didn't tell people the opposite only to now publicly declare that you agree with depressed people being "icky" and that they negatively affect everyone they speak to. Don't lie saying otherwise, even straight up disagreeing with people privately, if you're going to then agree publicly that they do in fact ruin everyone's mood.

[irritatedrhythm]

Another needle, another mild reaction. It's as if there's nothing sensitive left there. Any ideas?

[mzykels]

It’s weird to think that your heart is just sort of dangling from your aorta.

If you lean forward, it sloshes closer to your sternum and is easier to hear from the outside.

[irritatedrhythm]

So many needles in just a week, at this point I'm wondering if it's doing anything at all.

[irritatedrhythm]

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Worth less than anyone else in every way that matters.