@isaaclaheys-scarves - Tumblr Blog

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#when you felt like everyone pulled away from you when you were in your deepest depressive episode #and feel like those same people jump through hoops for others in the same spot #((:#i wanna help people so badly but why do i feel like no one tried to help me as much

luvinchris

NEW - Awww it seems he is filming something today

Thank you @knifevsstageprop for sending this to me :)

I’m so tired of existing. I’m so tired of having my heart stomped over. I’m so tired of feeling worthless and unloveable.

I just want to feel like the people I care about actually care about me. I’m so tired of suffering quietly and being scared to voice my hurt.

#not a single friend has asked me about bday plans #and so i can’t express why i’m fucking hurt #because i’m so fucking hurt and just want to cry all the time

pattinsonpoint

“Justice. The answer’s justice.”

#oh no…my crush on you…is back #YOU ARE RIPPED #robert pattinson

isaaclaheys-scarves

I’m calling it now, my birthday plans are going to fall through and I’ll be disappointed. As always.

isaaclaheys-scarves

Called it. Cancelling my own bday weekend and fucking off by myself.

I’m calling it now, my birthday plans are going to fall through and I’ll be disappointed. As always.

#because i’m not allowed to be happy on my birthday #or have things go my way

I hurt my own feelings. Love that for me.

#i just…can’t get him out of my head #and i did some digging and hurt my own goddamn feelings

The last 4 months have been the hardest of my life. I’m not okay mentally. However, I started an anti-depressant and am looking for a therapist. But I am…hurting and feel hopeless. It sucks. I want to be better. I’m struggling with looking for a FT job and therefore struggling to pay my student loans. On top of that, I ended up getting COVID. I’m fully vaxxed, minus a booster (was supposed to get it the day i tested positive, so now I have to wait a month) and have taken all the proper precautions. I’m fine. All my symptoms were mild and I’m all better. But it just felt like the fucking icing on the cake for the last 4 months. Cuz my life couldn’t get any worse, right?

#i still miss him and dating is not right for me #and that has a large hand in making me miserable but…idk