Stop This for Him

Independent & Canon Divergent Ziva David. Head Canon Driven. NCIS et al. Semi-Selective. OC friendly. Penned by Fae. est. 12/30/14. Wont you talk to me? Don't walk or run away... I'm onto you, yesterday...With empty eyes I don't know where I'm going... In search for answers... I don't know who I'm fighting... I stand with empty eyes You're like the ghost within me... Who's draining my life... It's like my soul is see through... Right through my empty eyes Right through my empty eyes

[israclixlioncss]

[TEXT] - i have good news and bad news.[ betterxinxisrael ]

@betterxinxisrael

[rubymemes]

𝐓𝐄𝐗𝐓𝐒 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐓𝐒 (a collection of texts prompts. Some have romantic undertones, but not all of them. Feel free to adjust phrasing and gendered terms as necessary)  TW: food & alcohol mention

[TEXT] - please just call me back.

[TEXT] - i’m sorry.

[TEXT] - so this is my number, but don’t save my name as anything sketchy.

[TEXT] - i’m making dinner tonight, you should come over.

[TEXT] - WHERE ARE YOU????

[TEXT] - you’re LATE.

[TEXT] - can we talk? 

[TEXT] - how did it go?

[TEXT] - you’re gonna laugh, but can you pick me up at the police station?

[TEXT] - thinking about you…

[TEXT] - i miss you so much.

[TEXT] - i have an idea, probably gonna get us in trouble though.

[TEXT] - i know you’re awake! pick up the phone! 

[TEXT] - so you’re just gonna ignore me forever? 

[TEXT] - i’m at taco bell you want anything? 

[TEXT] - are you awake?

[TEXT] - i have good news and bad news.

[TEXT] - how are you? 

[TEXT] - new phone, who is this? 

[TEXT] - wanna come over? 

[TEXT] - what’s wrong with you?!

[TEXT] - you only call me when you’re drunk. 

[TEXT] - me, you, a bad movie. you in? 

[TEXT] - wanna bang? [TEXT] - hang* [TEXT] - whatever

[TEXT] - i’ll seduce you with cool scientific facts.

[TEXT] - are you still alive?

[TEXT] - we are sophisticated adults ok?  [TEXT] - last week i purchased a vegetable

[TEXT] - i will not hesitate to strangle you

[TEXT] - what are you doing this weekend? 

[TEXT] - can i come over? [TEXT] - because i’m in your driveway.

[TEXT] - are you seriously leaving me on read right now?

[rubymemes]

𝐓𝐄𝐗𝐓𝐒 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐓𝐒 (a collection of texts prompts. Some have romantic undertones, but not all of them. Feel free to adjust phrasing and gendered terms as necessary)  TW: food & alcohol mention

[TEXT] - please just call me back.

[TEXT] - i’m sorry.

[TEXT] - so this is my number, but don’t save my name as anything sketchy.

[TEXT] - i’m making dinner tonight, you should come over.

[TEXT] - WHERE ARE YOU????

[TEXT] - you’re LATE.

[TEXT] - can we talk? 

[TEXT] - how did it go?

[TEXT] - you’re gonna laugh, but can you pick me up at the police station?

[TEXT] - thinking about you…

[TEXT] - i miss you so much.

[TEXT] - i have an idea, probably gonna get us in trouble though.

[TEXT] - i know you’re awake! pick up the phone! 

[TEXT] - so you’re just gonna ignore me forever? 

[TEXT] - i’m at taco bell you want anything? 

[TEXT] - are you awake?

[TEXT] - i have good news and bad news.

[TEXT] - how are you? 

[TEXT] - new phone, who is this? 

[TEXT] - wanna come over? 

[TEXT] - what’s wrong with you?!

[TEXT] - you only call me when you’re drunk. 

[TEXT] - me, you, a bad movie. you in? 

[TEXT] - wanna bang? [TEXT] - hang* [TEXT] - whatever

[TEXT] - i’ll seduce you with cool scientific facts.

[TEXT] - are you still alive?

[TEXT] - we are sophisticated adults ok?  [TEXT] - last week i purchased a vegetable

[TEXT] - i will not hesitate to strangle you

[TEXT] - what are you doing this weekend? 

[TEXT] - can i come over? [TEXT] - because i’m in your driveway.

[TEXT] - are you seriously leaving me on read right now?

[desertxflower]

This is the end...

                   L e t  the S K Y F A L L, 

                 When it crumbles, we will stand tall and face it all together….

Independent and Original Character for NCIS. NCIS: LA, NCIS: NOLA, NCIS: Hawaii. Police Procedural Roleplay. Covert Operations roleplay. Younger sister to Mossad Officer Malachi Ben-Gidon. Semi-Selective. Please read over biography and rules before interacting with muse.

[israclixlioncss]

Psa; Go on a wreck my feels why dont’cha?!

I’m not crying, you’re crying!!! 

I didn’t know that I needed this interaction, and the MUSE my god is she prominent. Ziva is like: “hello world, i’m here!!! did you miss me? pay attention to me!” 

She is finally getting the peace she deserves  😭 😭

[israclixlioncss]

Big-d-little-i-big-n-little-ozzo​:

She looked good. Looked healthy. But there were shadows in her eyes that spoke of horrors that he couldn’t even imagine, death and destruction that he’d walked away from. Ziva had clearly been entrenched in the danger that Tony had walked away from, all the things that Tony had turned his back on when she’d sent Tali to him. He could remember that look in his own eyes, but he hadn’t seen it in someone else since the last time he’d seen Gibbs.

He knew Ziva. He knew what kind of things would make her so desperate that she would send her daughter away, that she would send a child to him. Whatever she’d been doing, it had to be dangerous, risky. Tony didn’t even want to know the kind of danger she’d been in, but he had to. He had to know what it was, had to know that it was over.

Ziva wouldn’t have come back if Tali was still at risk, he knew that the same way he knew his middle name. She would never put Tali at risk. It was why he’d had the opportunity to know his daughter in the first place. Sending Tali to him had been smart, had made her safe. There was nothing Tony wouldn’t do for that little girl, including going into hiding in plain sight. It was one of the safest ways to go undercover, stick as close to the truth as you can but change a few key details. It was how he’d taken down two mob bosses and how he’d kept Tali out of any trouble for the past few years.

He thought of everything that Ziva had missed, everything she’d given up in order to protect Tali. He was the one who’d witnessed all of those firsts, who’d been there and taught her things that Ziva had thought she would teach her. Had Ziva longed to make cookies with Tali standing on a stool beside her swiping chocolate chips? Had she painstakingly kept Tali’s food kosher, just in case Tali wanted to keep kosher when she understood what it meant? Had she bought fluffy little dresses in hopes that Tali would wear them, only for their daughter to tumble in the dirt and rip them to shreds?

There were so many things that Tony was positive Ziva had wanted to do- things that Tony had done instead. He felt for her, for the pain that was etched on her face, for the way she was clearly hurting as she stood here watching Tali’s school. She’d come back, clearly aching for their daughter. Could he keep her away?

Selfishly, he wanted to tell her to go away, wanted to tell her that Tali was his now and Ziva couldn’t have her back. He wanted to take Tali and hop on a plane, run to Paris or Hawai’i, maybe to his nonna’s home in Italy. He wanted to pack Tali up and get as far away from here as he could. She was his daughter now, and he wasn’t going to let go of her.

But he knew how Tali looked at the pictures he’d given her of Ziva. She traced her fingers over them when he tucked her in at night, pressing kisses to the frames. Tali missed her mother and Tony knew that. He’d always said he’d do anything to give her Ziva back, and now that resolve was being tested. Would he be able to give her back if it meant Tali was gone from his life?

Didn’t he owe his daughter everything he could possibly give her in life? Hadn’t he sworn that he would do anything to keep her happy and safe? Here was someone who could help him with that, someone who could keep Tali safe the way he fought to. He knew Ziva. He knew the lengths she would take for Tali, the lengths she had already taken. How could he deny a mother that loyal access to her daughter?

He stuffed his hands into his pockets, glancing behind him at the school. Tali would be out soon, would be running to the gate, long hair in messy braids, babbling at him in Hebrew. He would pick her up and swing her in the air and answer all her questions in Italian. They would walk to the theater a few blocks away and he would buy her all the snacks her little heart desired. That was how Thursdays went. 

“Come to the movies with us,” he said impulsively, licking his lips as he returned his gaze to Ziva. “Tali and I go to the movies every Thursday. Come with us. If I upset her schedule she’ll throw a fit. Especially if she has to miss movie night. Come with us and then come home with us. I’ll make dinner. You can answer all my questions.”

His tone didn’t leave any room for argument. Ziva would answer his questions, would tell him where she’d been, everything that had happened. She would spin her yarn and he would listen. Then they’d decide where to go from there, how they were both going to be involved in Tali’s life. Because Tony wasn’t giving her up, and neither would Ziva. They would have to come to an accord.

“She’s learning Italian,” he changed gears, pulling one hand out of his pocket to run through his hair. “I thought I’d teach her as many languages as I could. We go to the movies to help her learn, same way I did. She’ll be excited to share that with you.”

There was a clatter at the school as the bell rang and kids started pouring out to meet waiting parents. Tony needed to get over there. Tali would be waiting with her teacher and a report on her behavior. She was a scrapper, always getting into fights with boys. Was Ziva like that when she was young?

“Come get her with me,” he held out his hand to Ziva, feeling cordial. “She’s like you. Never met a fight she couldn’t fight. Come see.”

He waited for her to take his hand, for this crucial moment in their relationship. This was where they started something new, where Tony let Ziva be a part of the most precious thing in his life. If she said no… well he wasn’t going to let her break Tali’s heart like that.

@big-d-little-i-big-n-little-ozzo​

Every impulse in her body told her to run. Perhaps it was best if she kept her distance? Perhaps it was better that only Tony knew she was alive? She couldn’t bear the thought of disappointing their little girl. She had to put on a brave face, for Tony’s sake, for Tali’s sake. This was the moment she had been waiting for. To be reunited with her family.

“Tony..” her voice trembled as she drew out his name, it brought her comfort. He again was showing her a kindness that she wasn’t sure she deserved. She had left without a word, disappeared into the shadows, knowing he would be there to help pick up the pieces. Again. Without much thought she pulled him into an overdue embrace. His familiar smell brought her comfort, eased the nagging voices that plagued her mind. She ended the embrace with a small smile, retracting herself from him. This smile was genuine. Something she hadn’t done in several years. Ducky had been right all along, solitude had only heightened her fears. Made her irrational. But that feeling of loneliness, longing for her daughter’s embrace was finally over.

Ziva allowed a small chuckle of amusement pass her lips at hearing that Tali, alike her father was a fan of the cinematic arts. That brought comfort to the Israeli woman. “Oh? I see, she will be a movie sensei like her Abba.” her tone had shifted, it was almost playful. There was the old Ziva...the one he probably remembered. “ I do not wish to impose...” she trailed off but his tone didn’t leave room for her protest. They would be going to the movies, as a family. “ But if you insist, I would be more than happy to oblige.” A movie? She couldn’t recall the last time she had seen a film. Seeing a movie seemed like such a luxury, especially for someone who had been on the run mere weeks ago. “ What will we be seeing? or will you leave that up to חיים שלי (haim shelli ||my life)? ”

It warmed Ziva’s heart to hear that Tony was starting Tali early on learning other languages. Italian, one of the romance languages. It was always one of Ziva’s favorites and would make learning any other Latin based language much easier. “ You are teaching her Italian? that is wonderful, how is her English? ” English wasn’t something Ziva had the chance to teach Tali. She taught her Hebrew first. She was determined for that to be her daughter’s first language, especially with them living in Israel it made the most sense to start there. She had planned to start teaching her English when they were forced apart. 

“ I had intended to teach her both English and Italian myself before my former life caught up with me..” her gaze shifted at her last statement. She shook off the thoughts, she needed to focus her attention on the present and stop living in the past. The past was done. Her daughter’s health and happiness was now her future. Ziva’s thoughts were interrupted by the school bell, the bell sent a chill down her spine. Her fist clenched as the chime brought up feelings of uneasiness. Her discomfort visible. She allowed herself a moment to collect herself, sucking in a deep breath and exhaling slowly. Her hand went to the sapphire necklace that little Tali had picked out for her all those years ago. It was Ziva’s only physical reminder of her  נסיכה (nesicha || princess). 

She motioned to the necklace around her neck. “This is the only reminder I have of Tali. She picked this necklace out for me...before the attack on the farmhouse.” Ziva could hear the commotion of children in the background. School was out. It was time. Time to be reunited with the only thing that mattered to her in this world. She placed her hand in Tony’s and gave it a light squeeze. She was nervous, what if Tali didn’t recognize her? What if she didn’t want to see her? “What if she doesn’t recognize me? she must have so many questions...Tony I do not know if I am ready. I--” Ziva felt selfish, crashing in on their life. She followed behind him, there was no going back to the shadows now.

Hearing that Tali was a spitfire alike herself made her smile, there was no denying that she was HER daughter. She stood beside Tony, foot tapping anxiously. What would she even say to the little girl? How big had she gotten? “How old is she now?” she mused while looking through the see of children for her חיים שלי (haim shelli || my life). Tali had to be around four or five now. Had it really been that long?

Out came a vibrant little girl, light brown hair and brilliant blue eyes. Ziva’s heart near stopped, there she was. Her Tali. She clasped her hand over her mouth as she felt tears begin to well in her eyes. She was beautiful, she looked happy. “ אהבה שלי (ahava shelli || My love)...” The Israeli woman’s voice cracked as she spoke the term of endearment aloud. 

[baringoursoulss]

“The ones who get too close… always end up dead.”

[thexoriginxofxstuff]

NCIS: Enemies Foreign [Season 8, Episode 8]

This is part two of a list of askbox starters from the three NCIS episodes with Malachi Ben-Gidon [ portrayed by T. J. Ramini ].

Feel free to change whatever pronouns need to be changed to make the sentences accurate.

For one at random, send in [?] and the mun will generate a number (1-90) to determine what your muse said to theirs.

Part One Part Three

Ah, our prison guard has come to check up on us.

All someone needs is the willingness to trade his life for mine, y'know, in the line of fire.

Am I sensing something between the two of you?

Americans. You can never just say hello.

And your family? How do they feel?

Black-on-black never goes out of style.

But I’m not done. Benefit of youth.

Dammit. Brought the wrong cane. The other cane’s got the flask.

Dead bad guy. The end.

Did you expect we would never… move on, after you left us?

Do you think it’s just by chance that he came back into your life?

Drop your weapon.

Get back!

Have you even spoken to him?

He has who knows how many guns trained on him right now and he’s completely oblivious.

He is a splinter in my toe, ______. He has been for years. If I do not extract him now, it could become infected.

His heart is hidden for a reason.

How ‘bout Shalom? Hello and goodbye.

I ask for a walk, and I get a tour of your city.

I can withstand anything you do.

I cannot disagree with that, ______. You have a way of making my family disappear.

I can’t believe some people have never heard of us.

I don’t have the luxury of allowing my feelings to dictate my actions.

I don’t think a round of applause would be too out of line.

I even bought gloves for the occasion.

I know this face. You made the same one when I told my brother he could not buy you a pony.

I mean, I suppose that it sounds complicated, but believe me, it’s not nearly as complicated as knowing that they’re never, ever gonna come back again.

I refuse to be afraid of 22-year-old girls. No matter what kind of magical pick-pocketing devices they’re sporting.

I was looking forward to the chill of an east coast winter. I understand the air here is different.

I will not reveal anything.

If someone wants something out of your pants, they should have to use their hands.

If you choose to let me be part of your life, I would welcome that with open arms.

I’m a magician.

I’m afraid all we have to offer in November are elections and pardoned turkeys.

I’m not speaking too fast for you, am I?

Is this the only alternative?

It may be necessary for me to defend myself.

It’s a matter of principal.

It’s God’s justice right there.

It’s kind of a bad idea to shoot at a cutter with a 9mm. It’s like trying to put out a forest fire with a Super Soaker, right?

It’s not a guessing game.

Let him come. He is one. We are many.

Let’s not get hung up on who’s left, who’s right, and who’s wrong.

Most fathers teach their daughters how to drive. I have you to blame for this.

Movement gets the blood flowing, stimulates the mind, can even create the illusion of freedom.

Ninja senses tingling?

No. He’s aware. He’s always aware of what he does. Not caring about the consequences is what makes him who he is.

Nobody protects you quite like a trained killer.

Now. You must be courageous and learn the truth.

Oh good! the Israelis are back.

Oh look at this. I get to play school teacher again.

Oh yeah. He’s an awful sonuvabitch. Everyone knows that.

Our people are supposed to be better. If he manages to get through and to kill me, I wouldn’t want to go on anyway.

Outsiders are not allowed to be unaccompanied in this building.

People do tend to follow patterns.

Personally, I don’t like losing things.

Pirates do like rum.

Protect the guy we invited; find the ones we didn’t.

She is young. What she lacks in experience, she makes up for with a passion unlike I have ever seen.

Somewhere, on a piece of paper, it has been written.

Still. I feel this, ah, measuring contest would be more at home in the men’s room, don’t you think?

That is absurd.

That is all you’re going to say to me?

That’s dark. Even for black-on-black.

That’s right. You should still be terrified of my kind.

The first rule of fishing, patience is everything.

There are different techniques for protecting a young man and an older man.

There something going on I should know about?

There was a time, ______, when I was quite different, when my house was filled with the sound of children laughing.

There was… a threat. It has been assessed, confronted, and dealt with, in a fashion.

This a witch hunt? With you wearing the pointy hat?

This is a fool’s errand.

This is incredible. Pretzel with peanut butter inside. This is American ingenuity.

We are calm. You’re yelling.

We will make sure they do not succeed. If necessary, we will place ourselves in the line of fire.

Well, of course we are sleeping together. It’s just nothing serious.

What does it matter to you?

What’s happened?

Why don’t you just memorize your lines and don’t bump into the furniture?

You almost made me spill my coffee.

You are not dead. You are living your life, making your choices.

You consider yourself heroic?

You did not need to wait for me.

You do not have any feelings.

You do plan on talking to that girl, don’t you?

You read up on me.

You should see your dad.

Your father is coming. He’ll be here in three days.

You’re fluent in chicken-scratch. Perhaps you can make out this scrawl.

You’re very… tongue-in-ear.

[rp-meme-glaceon]

Ask my muse questions about their past

Get specific! Ask about the home life, their experiences, incidents that have affected them, etc!

[grab-an-idea]

Gibbs’ Rules Starters

1. “Never let suspects stay together.”

1. “Never screw over your partner.”

2. “Always wear gloves at a crime scene.”

3. “Never believe what you’re told. Double check.”

3. “Never be unreachable.”

4. “Best way to keep a secret, keep it to yourself. Second best, tell one other person - if you must. There is no third best.”

5. “You don’t waste good.”

6. “Never say you’re sorry.”

7. “Always be specific when you lie.”

8. “Never take anything for granted.”

9. “Never go anywhere without a knife.”

10. “Never get personally involved on a case.”

11. “When the job is done, walk away.”

12. “Never date a co-worker.”

13. “Never involve lawyers.”

14. “Bend the line, don’t break it.”

15. “Always work as a team.”

16. “If someone thinks he has the upper hand, break it.”

18. “It’s better to seek forgiveness than ask permission.”

20. “Always look under.”

22. “Never, ever bother _____ in interrogation.”

23. “Never mess with ________’s coffee if you want to live.”

27. “Two ways to follow someone. First way, they never notice you. Second way, they only notice you.”

28. “When you need help, ask.”

35. “Always watch the watchers.”

36. “If it feels like you’re being played, you probably are.”

38. “Your case, your lead.”

39. “There’s no such thing as a coincidence.”

40. “If it seems like someone’s out to get you, they are.”

42. “Never accept an apology from someone who just sucker-punched you.”

44. “First thing’s first, hide the women and the children.”

45. “Left a mess I gotta clean up.”

51. “Sometimes you’re wrong.”

62. “Always give people space when they get off an elevator.”

69. “Never trust a woman who doesn’t trust her man.”

[israclixlioncss]

Unrequited Love & Heartbreak

"Are you really that fucking blind?"

"I'm the one's that's always been there for you, not him/her!"

"I'm in love with you."

"I think I love you."

"I never loved you."

"Can we pretend you didn't say that?"

"Can we pretend I didn't say that?"

"I don't feel the same way."

"I think we should just be friends."

"It's so obvious that you like him/her."

"Can you stop talking about him/her?"

"You know I like/love you, and I'm trying to forget that, but you make it pretty difficult to do that by talking about him/her every time we speak."

"Every time I try to move on, you're right there."

"Stop leading me on."

"You're playing with me."

"I never thought we'd have a last kiss."

"I'm tired of being your doormat."

"Take a chance on me."

"Can I kiss you?"

"I'm tired of being your second choice."

"I'm not even your second choice, I'm not even in the top ten to you!"

"I can't keep pretending that I don't care."

"I was in love with you and you took advantage of it."

"I kinda wanna be more than friends."

"Have you ever stopped to think I have feelings, too?"

"It's pretty shitty how you think you're entitled to have a relationship with me because we're friends."

"Just let me go."

"I regret every time I've said I love you."

"All I've ever learned from love is that someone is always gets fucked someone over."

"Have you ever been in love?"

"I don't believe in love."

"I don't wanna get hurt."

"I'm not gonna hurt you."

"I can't do this anymore."

"You broke my heart."

"Please don't leave me."

"It's over."

"I can't erase you."

[maurawrites]

Cote De Pablo as Ziva David in ‘NCIS’

[maurawrites]

Cote De Pablo as Ziva David in ‘NCIS’

[big-d-little-i-big-n-little-ozzo]

@israclixlioncss​

She was the light of his life. 

If someone had asked him years ago if he thought he’d love a child like this he would have said no, would have explained that he didn’t know how to love a child, that he didn’t have the best example of what a father should be. Then he’d met Tali, heard her call him abba for the first time, and he knew that his heart was sold. There wasn’t anything he wouldn’t do for that little girl. He would give her the world.

And he had. He’d resigned from NCIS immediately and set off with Tali, determined to keep her safe from the fate that had befallen her mother. New York was as good a place to hide as any, an easy place to build a new identity. The tug of familiarity it brought didn’t hurt. He could raise Tali in New York, could keep her safe from anyone who might come to hurt her because of who he and Ziva were. Tali would be protected.

It was a Thursday, movie day, and Tony was walking to Tali’s Hebrew school, ready to pick her up for their nightly tradition. The old theater that his mum had taken him to was still open, still playing the classics. He had started the tradition with Tali when she was four and struggling to learn English. The same method that had taught him English had taught his daughter, a tradition he’d been proud to carry on. It was something he could give her of his mum, something that would connect her to family.

His mind was on the movie, on what Tali would tell him she’d learned today, on the crowds around him. That was the only reason he saw her standing there, leaning against a tree on the other side of the street, looking achingly like the little girl he was about to pick up. Tony pulled up short and stared at her for a few minutes, wondering if she was really there or if she was a ghost. Then she glanced away from the school and their eyes met and he knew. This was really her.

Crossing the street, Tony fought down all the emotions he was feeling. He didn’t want to lose control in front of the school, didn’t want Tali to see him angry or upset. He’d calmed down a lot from the hothead he’d once been. He wouldn’t lose his temper.

“You’re looking very healthy for a dead woman,” he stopped in front of her, emotions carefully blank. “Where have you been, Ziva?”

[israclixlioncss]

@big-d-little-i-big-n-little-ozzo​

These last few years had been the hardest years of her life, the Israeli woman had given up everything to keep her daughter safe. They had a good life in Israel, one where the former NCIS agent had finally been able to find some peace. She had lived in Israel for  four years undisturbed, her past had stayed where she left it. Becoming a mother was one of the best gifts she could have received, finally she had a family of her own. Her Tali. 

In honor of her late sister Ziva had named her daughter Talia, but called her the cherished namesake of Tali. Little Tali was all she could ever hope for, she was perfect in everyway. Ziva had gotten to watch her grow from an infant to a toddler, watched as she learned to like certain foods, taught her new words in Hebrew. They were truly happy. 

That was, before their small sliver of happiness was ripped out from under them. The past had caught up with Ziva, sending her into hiding and having to make the hardest decision in her life...sending Tali away to D.C. 

The mortar attack on her late father’s farmhouse had sent Ziva into a panic. Her mind was clouded with fears of losing her daughter. She had to! She had to send her away for her own safety and to end things once and for all. Tali had been sent to D.C. to live with her father, someone Ziva trusted and cared for deeply. Tony. At least then she knew that Tali would grow up with some sense of normalcy. That didn’t make it hurt any less...

She had fought her way through splinter cell after cell looking for the woman they called Sahar. Someone else wanted her dead, and for what? She had lost count of all the harm she had caused. With the help of Adam Eshel she was able to cope...barely. Her search led her back to her former home of Washington D.C., where she crossed paths with the man she considered her father figure. It had been a long and hard game...but in the end it was worth it. Sahar was dead. That meant she could finally see little Tali again. And Tony.

McGee had given Ziva a lead on where to look for family, which brought her to New York. With some digging she was able to track down a man and a young girl who resembled that of her lost family...

Lingering from afar Ziva watched, umber brown hues scanning the crowds outside of the school. Her lead had brought her here. Would she finally be reunited with her daughter after being away for so long. Ziva stood against a tree, arms crossed against her chest anxiously looking for anyone that could resemble her Tali. The flood of guilt that began to set in had her on edge. Her fists clenched so tightly that her nails dug into the flesh of her palms. 

Breathe Ziva...breathe. She thought to herself.

The questions that raced her mind were overwhelming. What if Tali didn’t remember her? What if Tony wouldn’t allow her to see Tali? What if her lead was wrong? She was going down a rabbit hole...questioning if she even had the right to be here. Her shoulders tensed, chest heavy, it felt like someone was sitting on her chest. She couldn’t breathe. She wasn’t as strong as she used to be... she used to be able to fight off these feelings. Nowadays she just about drowned in them...

Her eyes moved away from the school only momentarily and when her gaze returned that was when she saw him. Tony. Or at least someone that shared an uncanny appearance. Her eyes locked with his momentarily before she looked down. She wasn’t ready. She needed to leave before she was noticed. But it was too late, the man who resembled an old friend was headed right for her. 

Panic set in, there was that feeling again...heavy chest, uneven breathing, eyes darting away like a cornered animal. ‘ You’re looking very healthy for a dead woman,’ she heard the man say. Her gaze shifted up, almost shocked to see Tony standing before her. It was him... a small smile tugged at the corners of her lips. How she wanted to just embrace her old friend and apologize for the lack of transparency. But his tone indicated otherwise... guilt gnawed at her, this was not the feeling she was expecting to have seeing him again.  ‘Where have you been, Ziva?’

Lips parted but the words would not come out, she wouldn’t burden him with her woes. He had done that kindness for her, for far to long. Taking a brief moment to collect her thoughts she finally mustered the courage to respond. “ Hello Tony..”

Her voice wasn’t higher than a whisper, her gaze fixated on the man in front of her. Afraid if she looked away he would disappear and she would wake up realizing that it was just another dream. “ I-I truly am sorry.” her voiced faltered. 

“ I promise I’ll explain everything...but not here. ” She didn’t want to do this in front of place that brought some semblance of joy for him or their daughter. “Tim, told me where to find you..” she had made Tim promise not to tell Tony anything. Not that she alive, not that she was stateside. She wanted to do that herself when she was certain Tony and Tali were out of harms way. 

[israclixlioncss]

Life of the past

@nciselliebishop

It was early fall in D.C., the air crisp as autumn leaves littered the sidewalks. The weather was overcast, with a slight drizzle in the forecast. It was a curious thing that brought the Israeli's return to D.C., she had unfinished business. The Israeli woman was staying at a safe house arranged by a contact of hers. Somewhere she often visited during her active status as an NCIS agent, it was a private place where she could unloaded her thoughts. It was remote, had the essentials that she needed and the location was unknown to those she cared about most.

She hadn't spoken to anyone from her past... not in a long time. They all thought she was dead, It was best this way. Faking her death was the best way to keep them all safe and away from the danger that seemed to follow her for years. This was the first time she had come out of hiding since the mortar attack on her father's farmhouse. She was forced out of hiding, as the threat she was seeking to neutralize had gotten too close to her old home and family.

Ziva found herself yet again entangled in a web of conspiracies, sitting in the small makeshift office that Odette had so kindly kept in tact for her. She was planning her next move, the woman she was after, Sahar was somewhere nearby. Ziva sat at an oak desk, a map of the D.C. metropolitan area unfolded on it's surface. Next to the map sat a laptop and notebook. The laptop was air gapped to prevent any intrusions to her manhunt. A trick an old friend had taught her, Tim McGee. Tim. An old friend that she hadn't seen since the last time she stepped on U.S. soil. Fond memories came rushing back, the pranks they used to pull on each other. A small smile graced her features as she thought about her NCIS family. How she missed them...

The sudden sound of tire tracks on the gravel outside caused the demeanor of the Israeli woman to change. Someone was here. Odette had mentioned stopping by around seven to check in on Ziva, but it was far too early to be Odette. She needed to make herself scarce. She quickly folded the map of D.C. on the desk and locked the laptop, closing the lid as quietly as possible. She shoved the laptop and map into a green messenger bag, pausing as footsteps drew near.

She needed to find a way out without being spotted. She needed to leave N O W. Collecting herself she moved towards the dresser that held many of her hidden thoughts. There was false wall behind it leading to a tunnel under the main property. That was her way out. Moving the dresser just enough to slip through the hidden door, Ziva slipped through the hidden door. Making sure to fully close it behind her. Her heart was racing, hands shaking. This couldn't be the end...had she lost her touch? She was not the same woman she once used to be. Fearless. Her breath hitched in her chest, she was having a panic attack. This wasn't the optimal time for her emotions to be overwhelming her. Frozen in place, she sucked in a shallow breath, hearing the door open as she lingered in the breezeway between her office space and the tunnel that would lead her away from the property. Who was this unknown visitor? How did they find her?!

[soulrph]

𝙁𝙄𝙍𝙎𝙏-𝙏𝙄𝙈𝙀 𝙋𝘼𝙍𝙀𝙉𝙏𝙎 𝙋𝙍𝙊𝙈𝙋𝙏𝙎 (𝙋𝙏. 1)

as requested by a powerfully patient and endlessly lovely nonnie!! there will be more lists like this, because frankly, parenthood is a whole theme park of roller coasters with unique challenges and milestones in each of them! but these are for parents who have recently become parents to a newborn! i also have requests for prompts based on foster families and adopted children, but i'd like to do my own research before i dive too deeply into those, because obviously the rules vary from country to country, but i digress! i sincerely hope you all enjoy these! unclench your jaw, drink some water, roll back your shoulders! DO NOT ADD TO THIS LIST PLEASE!!

" if you waken that baby, so help me god, there won't be a corner of the universe that will protect you from my wrath. "

" do you wanna hold him/her/them? here, it's okay! just support the neck like... yeah, there you go! you got it! "

" no, no, it's okay, i'm not going anywhere. the baby spit up on everything i own except this sparkly little number, so i'm waiting for the washing cycle to end until i can change out of this! come on in. "

" i don't think i've had a full night's sleep since the baby came along. "

" i'm gonna train this kid, night and day, until they say my name before yours. that's my goal. my name is gonna be their first word. "

" i love my baby. more than i ever dreamed possible! but they've kept me awake since the second they were born! i seriously need a nap... could you keep an eye on them until i wake up? just twenty minutes, i promise you! "

" it kinda feels like every single person in the world suddenly has a PhD in parenting to make me feel incompetent with. "

" i think our sweet angel's gonna be a rock star with that set of lungs! "

" we need a new babysitter. preferably one who won't read rosemary's baby to our newborn. "

" god, they're so precious when they're asleep... can you believe we're that kid's parents?! "

" how can something so tiny go through a billion diapers every single day?! "

" they smiled at me today! actually smiled, i swear! that baby is a genius! and no, it wasn't trapped gas, before you say it. "

" that darling child ripped a fistful of my hair out today, so if you see a bald spot, now you know why it's there. "

" shh... shh, honey, it's okay. the baby woke up, but i'm handling it. you just go back to sleep now, okay? "

" i was thinking... if, for whatever reason, i'm not able to take care of the baby, i was wondering if you might be okay with being their legal guardian? "

" so pre-schools aren't only super competitive, they've also got some insanely high standards now, too! one of them won't even let me bring my car in unless it's completely emission-free! "

" the baby has a remarkably dark sense of humour. they only seem to laugh when i stub my damn toe on the crib at 4 in the morning. "

" we had a somewhat violent reaction at the diaper station this morning. so that meant i had to bathe and change the little cherub twice in ten minutes, and then go take another shower and find new clothes unscathed by infant vandals again. "

" he/she/they have your eyes. and your batshit insane sleep schedule. "

" you know what really pisses me off? when people act as though new parents have it easy. like a newborn is the easiest thing in the world to handle. i'd like to see them make coffee, change a diaper and fold a onesie one-handed! "

" isn't it so crazy that this tiny little human, who can't even hold their own head up yet, might be like, a president or something one day? "

" i'm really sorry, i know we had plans tonight, but i literally just got the baby to sleep and all i wanna do is lie down and eat the leftovers of a bag of potato chips until i fall asleep. i haven't showered all week, i can't remember the last time i wore clean clothes, and... it's just not gonna work out tonight. "

" i figured you wouldn't have much time to cook, what with the baby and all. so i decided i'd bring a lasagna and some groceries over to you, and i can keep an eye on the little one while you take a nice hot shower and eat your dinner in peace! "

" hey... relax. i promise you, the babysitter can handle it for a few hours! and if they need you, they've got your phone number, right? so just... take a night off. sit back. enjoy yourself. the baby is fine, i promise you! "

" you know, if you guys wanted a date night, i could mind the baby for you? "

" i swear, this baby is the freaking jackpot of excuses to not attend all those events! all the times i wanted to throw sharon's awful hummus at her face during those dinner parties, and now i don't even have to go anymore, all because of this beautiful, wonderful little baby! "

" i mean, sure, sometimes i'm crying 24/7 and i don't know what the hell i'm doing! but then i'll tickle the baby's little foot and they'll laugh for thirty minutes, and it just makes me so insanely, immeasurably happy! "

" what do you think? will we try for baby number two? make this little angel a big brother/sister/sibling? "

" i need a night out. please. i'm begging you. i cannot sing another single note of baby shark! please, even a trip to the grocery store would do! "

" god, couldn't you just sit and watch them sleep forever? "

" oh god, he/she/they're crying! the baby's crying! oh man, is that a hungry cry or a diaper cry?! talk to me, little baby! "

" i cannot believe we just paid four figures for a cradle when the baby won't even sleep unless they're in our arms... "

" you know, that little baby is so freaking lucky to have you as their mom/dad/parent. "

" a-actually, maybe you better keep holding them. i mean, what if i hurt them by accident? or what if i scare them? babies don't like me, they never have! "

" you know, i always thought newborn babies looked like potatoes. but this kid is pretty darn cute! "

" i believe congratulations are in order. where's the new addition? "

" i never realized how expensive diapers were until now... "

" mm... honey, the baby... the baby's crying. wake up, baby, go help the baby... "

" nice try, but i got the baby the last time. it's your turn now. probably a diaper change, too, by the sound of it. "

" how can someone so tiny drink so much freaking milk?! "

" i wish people would quit acting like parenting experts every single time they see me. believe it or not, i do know what i'm doing! "

" some stranger on the bus decided to let me know i was a terrible mother/father/parent for not choosing to raise the baby on a vegan diet. "

" did you think of any baby names yet? or is this sweet little angel still anonymous? "

" i'm thinking we should decorate the nursery while the baby's still napping. i got the paint in my car; what do you think? "

" this baby is officially more extroverted than me! every single person we met in the park, this socializing star was waving and smiling at them like crazy! "

" oh my god, remember that little blanket you gave us when the baby was born? yeah! they refuse to go to sleep without it now, it's the cutest thing ever! "

" oh, i took the most adorable photo of the baby yesterday while they were sleeping! wanna see? "

" i don't think you need to worry about your parenting skills. 'cause that little baby in there is the happiest, luckiest kid in the whole world just by having you in their life. they might not know it yet. but they are. "

" well, according to the principal at the last pre-school, we should have been booking placements before the baby was even conceived. "

" i wonder what kind of life this baby will grow up to live? "

" you're such a natural with the baby! he/she/they love you so much already; look how they're gazing up at you! "

" i'm so sorry, but we're gonna have to leave early; the bottle leaked all over my bag, and it's feeding time now, so it's either leave early or unleash a screaming infant on you! "

" would you mind holding the baby for a minute while i go grab my stuff? "

" don't judge, but we were out of clean onesies, so i dressed the baby in that huge old t-shirt you got at that concert five years ago. if i'm being honest, it suits them! "

" listen. i know i complain and i struggle. i honestly think my mistakes outnumber my triumphs, as far as parenting is concerned. but i have never loved anything nor anyone nearly as much as i love this baby. never. "

[dutychained-blog1]

taken from the comic book series written by neil gaiman

“the price of wisdom is above rubies.”

“when do the nightmares slip out into the daylight?”

“it was a dark and stormy nightmare.”

“I left a monarch. yet I return alone…hungry.”

“never trust a [insert word here]. he has a hundred motives for anything he does - 99 of them, at least, malevolent.”

“I would have dreamed of you…if I could dream.”

“the real problem with stories: if you keep them going long enough, they always end in death.”

“little ghost, get out of my way.”

“I’ve learned from my mistakes, but I’ve had more time to commit more mistakes.”

“I suppose there are worse endings.”

“it is a fool’s prerogative to utter truths no one else will speak.”

“I only have two kinds of dreams: the bad and the terrible.”

“the price of getting what you want is getting what you once wanted.”

“it’s part of growing up, I suppose. you always have to leave something behind you.”

“nobody looks up in the sky anymore.”

“everybody has a secret world inside of them.”

“it is sometimes a mistake to climb, it is always a mistake never even to make the attempt.”

“sometimes you wake up. sometimes the fall kills you. and sometimes, when you fall, you fly.”

“without dreams, there could be no despair.”

“it is unwise to summon what you cannot dismiss.”

“never trust the storyteller. only trust the story.”

“destiny is blind.”

“remember how hard it was for me to leave, and that it was not your fault.”

“life, like time, is a journey through darkness.”

“I like the stars. It’s the illusion of permanence, I think. I can pretend that lives last longer than moments.”

“when something ends, there’s always something left over. a story, or a vision, or a hope.”

“I don’t recommend revenge. it tends to have repercussions.”

“honesty is a somewhat overrated virtue.”

“I suppose the point you grow up is the point you let the dreams go.”

“the things we do make echoes.”

“all journeys leave marks on us.”

“have you ever been in love? horrible, isn’t it? it makes you so vulnerable.”

“when there’s no hope, you might as well be dead.”

“they will haunt your sleep until you die.”

“everything changes, and nothing is truly lost.”