i really dont know anymore.

[wishing-for-deathx]

A lot of times I get this irresistible urge to end my life. The only thing that stops me is getting it wrong.

— someday that’s not going to be enough

[lonelynotlonely]

[sa-dnesss]

“you ever just want to fucking cut your body to shreds until you bleed the fuck out because that’s where I am at right now.”

—

[lonelynotlonely]

And somehow I realized that there's nothing I want anymore. Nothing makes sense anymore. Nothing makes me happy anymore. I realized I'm dead.

[sa-dnesss]

“I am fucking tired of staying up late and thinking about everything I have ever done wrong, and how much everything hurts.”

— late night thoughts

[blood-quiet]

[raen1-deactivated20240910]

—idk when will parents understand that the shit they say affect us the most. more than any critical comment by a best friend.

[wildfire-268]

Home is not home anymore.

I don't know where I am supposed to go.

When home isn't home anymore.

It has become a unwelcome visit, a sour taste at the back of my mouth.

It has become the burn in my chest n the tears in my eyes.

Home isn't home anymore.....

No matter if I look from a different perspective

From different angles, everything is still the same

It's not the place itself, its the creatures with nasty personalities, the creatures that stab you in the back when you are not looking, speaks ill of you, fills others ears with poison.

This place isn't home anymore no matter how much I wish it was.....

No matter how much I wish to have a family...

That doesn't exist in this home, Can you even call this a home?

I have become a wanderer, wandering when or where will I find my place, my home, my family.

Because as sad this may sound, I don't have a home and i barely recognize these creatures.

These creatures that spew hate,envy, selfishness and self loathing, these creatures that only see everybodies defects but there own.

These creatures that only want caos n destruction.

I wonder when I'll find my home....

Home isn't home anymore........

[grinseekatzee]

I‘ll Never understand how my mum could see me come out of my room one time everyday for months straight with tears and constant sadness written all over my face, never eating not enjoying the things I loved, never taking showers, sleeping all day long and barley making ist through the day and still yell about me not cleaning something of theirs. It‘s funny how they Never cared and Never asked if I was okay or how I was doing.

[mytherapi]

I don't know how to stop my younger self from crying when all I want is a hug from my mom but mom is my trauma...

[another-worthless-fuckup]

So that’s where it all started.

[shebloomedbutwontforgethepast]

“Being emotionally neglected all your life is so damaging in so many ways.”

—

[worthless-misery]

Dear diary...

My life is just a complete waste of time and space.

I shouldn't be here at all.

I'm sorry I exist.

I'm sorry I'm such a burden.

[0nly-an-illusi0n]

[just-shoot-me-dead]

Most people would think I want to cry, when in reality I want to drive to the middle of fucking nowhere and scream as loud as I fucking can from the deepest part of my fucking dead lungs and aging heart for 10 mins straight.

[shebloomedbutwontforgethepast]

There's something really heartbreaking about looking at old pictures and seeing the slow progression of losing yourself. Watching the light fade from your eyes, and realizing you've fuckn lost yourself and you have no clue who you are right this moment. And you're only losing yourself more with every passing day.

[bpdamn]

i’m the problem. i’m draining to be around. i turn everything good into something toxic. i can’t stop myself from ruining everything, no matter how hard i try. i’m the only one to blame. i’m poison to everyone around me, i destroy everything i touch