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@its-marymac-blog
gideonprwtt
âYeah, Iâm Gideon,â he replied, and for a moment he was struck with nostalgia. It had always been Gideon and Fabian, or Fabian and Gideon; never had he thought heâd be recognized on his own, singularly. He didnât want to doom the mood of the conversation though â Mary seemed anxious enough as it was, and small talks with newcomers typically shouldnât include deaths ⊠unless you were Moody, but the man was an exception to every social norm existed.
He nodded in sympathy when she talked about living communally. It had been a while, so his memory may be incorrect, but he remembered that his fourth and fifth years had been horrifying, with the start of puberty and the significant rise in â er â certain physical activities. He and Fabian had managed to escape to the library several times when it got unbearable in their dorm rooms. The screaming portraits were another thing he didnât miss from his summers back at the Prewett mansion. They whined so much about the temperature.
âIâm glad I dodge that bullet then,â he replied. An idea occurred in his mind then, just as he was about to excuse himself to go back to his practice. âHey, if youâre up for it, do you want to duel? Both of us can get some practice.â
"It's nice to meet you," Mary said with a smile, finally calm. She didn't know much about the man in front of her, other than what was in the papers and what little Dumbledore had told her. She knew he had lost his brother and an urge to offer her condolences washed over her. She fought it for it didn't seem appropriate under these circumstances, especially considering this was their first meeting.
"Oh, sure. I could always use more practice, I suppose," Mary replied. Honestly, the idea made her a bit nervous. "I should get probably get changed, though. How about I meet you in the practice hall?" This suggestion was made in order to buy some time to compose herself. She needed to be in the correct headspace to duel and she hoped that this little detour would give her enough time to psych herself up. She rose and walked swiftly to her room.
Mary spent her walk quickly going over her list of defensive and offensive spells. Thinking on her feet was her greatest shortcoming in dueling, but no matter how much she went over the spells it never seemed to improve. She quickly changed into some exercise clothing as she tried to keep herself from starting to panic. "You've got this," she said to herself before taking a deep breath and making her way to the practice room. Her heart was beating faster than normal as she entered the large room. Pulling her long hair into a high ponytail as she walked closer to Gideon, she asked him, "Are you ready?"
Ask Me Anything (2014) dir. Allison Burnett
barestofbones
He probably shouldnât have enjoyed the way the smile fell from her lips, but despite right and wrong, there he was, relishing the effect his words had on her resolve. Edgar had his answer then. He wondered idly if he was the true source of her anger, or if it was a lingering disgust over the mess that came in the form of her first love that held her unable to stomach the sight of Edgar, but asking was outlandish enough to keep even his lips sealed.
âTheyâre just jealous that they wonât be able to marry their granddaughters off to the Bones heir. Youâre just a bit of competition as far as theyâre concerned,â he replied, smiling all the same. It wasnât the whole truth, considering his family wasnât exactly on the great list, but his parentsâ clout and wealth did attract enough interest for his quip to hold some validity. âI would be more than happy to straighten that out if the idea of my name being attached to yours is a problem?â
He slid into the chair he perched on as if to show how serious he was about staying. One leg crossed over the opposite, his ankle settling on top of his knee, and as he looked at Mary settled on the floor, he found himself losing grip on his ability to stop himself from saying too much. Heâd left school before the drama broke out, and there in the center of it all had been one shell-shocked Mary Macdonald. Considering he didnât have the right (or chance) to hear it from the horseâs mouth until now, he quickly talked himself into believing he had a right to say, âProbably couldâve saved yourself a world of trouble if youâd gone along with it back then, though.â
âThatâd be quite the sight,â she said as she chuckled at the thought. âIâm not quite sure that you would be able to take on a group experienced witches.â She paused for a moment, reveling in the fantasy. âYou know, you should go for it. I wouldnât mind watching you get your ass handed by a group of old witches.â She was only half-kidding; watching Edgar get pummeled would certainly put a smile on her face. She would never admit this to anyone, of course.
Mary kept her eyes on him as he settled into the arm chair. It seemed like she wouldnât be able to keep this conversation short and sweet as she had originally planned.
Any hope Mary had for keeping this interaction pleasant was dashed as he spoke. How could anyone have the audacity to speak to someone like this? âA world of trouble,â she repeated under her breath. Her hand instinctively reached for her mug as she tried to process the words he spoke? A world of trouble was quite the understatement, but of course Edgar wouldnât know that. No one would ever be able to understand the true extent of what she went through. Of what she was still going through.
The long sip of tea failed to calm the rage that was brewing inside her. âA world of trouble,â she repeated once more through grit teeth. âIâm sure there was plenty I couldâve done to prevent what happened to me. What I donât understand is why you thought that humiliating a fifteen-year-old girl was the best way to try and help her.â A bitter look clouded her blue eyes as they stayed locked on his.
I wish youâd find the exit out of my head.
Virginia Woolf, âLetter to Vita Sackville-West,â November 22, 1933 (via falsereligion)
alfcrtescue
The 8th of June 1979. ft. @its-marymac
There were just some things that Alice was never going to stop doing no matter how much she wanted to. Laughing when she was nervous, saying âIâm sorryâ too often, and pushing herself harder than necessary to reach self-imposed standards. The latter wasnât necessarily because she was obsessed with being the absolute best or anything like that. It was just that the young woman often felt like it was her against the world. And the world was winning, really kick her rear as of late. So she needed to up her game and be prepared for all the right hooks and side punches it had to throw.
She stood in a wide empty room of Dedalus Diggleâs home where Moody regularly taught advance defense spells. The members of the order were encouraged to practice on the transfigured targets or on each other in the safe space. It had oddly enough reminded Alice of her days back in duelling club. Though back then she didnât remember feeling so pressured to do no less than perfect. The spells practiced during her youth were just a fun pass time to add to her impressive weaponry. Something she could tell her fellow classmates about and them they would gawk at her saying that there was no way she perfected such an advanced spell at such a young age. To which Alice would just sheepishly nod and say that it just took a little time and effort, anyone could do it, really. But now, there was an added weight to every instruction she was given and every advancement made. Because these spells would be used to save someoneâs life, if done right. And she was getting fed up with losing people.
Gripping her wand tight in her right hand, Alice lunged back as she created a Wall of Fire between herself and the dummy she was practicing her duelling on. As the flames roared, she gracefully moved to the side to hit the dummy in the leg with another spell. If it had been a real person it wouldâve easily crippled them and left them at the mercy of the small woman in front of them. With a flick of her wrist the flames ceased and Alice was back to square one, thinking up more and more creative ways to Take Down the poor dummy in front of her. Almost too in her head to notice she wasnât completely alone in the space.
Alice moved to place her wand in between her teeth as she pulled her soft locks into a high bun, only then turning to recognize the blonde. âOmf,â her words not all coming out right due to the wandâs interference. Once it had been removed, she cleared her throat and smiled (not remembering when she last used her voice, seeing as she had locked herself away in the room for awhile). ââEllo, Miss Mary.â Though the two hadnât talked much the older female was familiar with the younger. Sheâd seen her more in the past week than she had in during their school days, probably. âSorry, I uh, were you looking for someone? Or did you want to use the room? Because I can leave you be if youâd like.â And although the offer was sincere, Aliceâs big brown eyes were silently hoping Mary wouldnât kick her out. Her determination to continue her training was strong.
After the incident in the living room last week, Mary knew she needed far more practical dueling practice. She wasn't the worst at duelling, by any means, but she felt that she lacked the instincts that others had for it. Much more practice was going to be needed if she was going to save anyone. Throwing spells at a target by herself wouldn't help improve the skills necessary for accomplishing her goals.
Moody was an amazing resource for this, of course, but he had the skills of the entire Order to worry about. It had only been a week or so since the classes began and Mary already saw that she was falling behind the group. To remedy this, she spent plenty of time practicing alone, but most of her practices were spent perfecting spell techniques rather than combat casting. A few of these uneventful solo sessions passed before she concluded that she was in need of a tutor. After seeing her in action last year, Mary figured Alice was perfect for the job.
Mary was passing through the house when she heard the sounds of what was sure to be an intense practice happening in the room down the hall. Figuring that it couldn't hurt, she slowly opened the door to take a peek inside. Even just observing the others often helped her nail down her own process. It was a pleasant surprise to find that source of the noise was the girl she had been hoping to speak to. Mary watched the performance in silence, not daring to interrupt. The elegance and speed with which Alice darted back and forth simply amazed her. If Mary had been in the dummy's place, she knew she wouldn't be able to keep her eyes on her assailant. These were exactly the skills that she admired in Alice.
Once she realized that she had been spotted, Mary walked toward the girl. "Hi, Alice," she said with a smile on her face, masking the embarrasment she had for getting caught. "No, no, you don't have to go. I was, um, I was actually hoping to run into you."
Mary turned to the toppled over dummy and mused at how it looked thoroughly defeated in its current position. "That was an amazing display. You've really got a talent for this stuff, huh?" Every word she spoke was sincere and she was sure that her admiration was showing through, perhaps even a bit too much. There was no chance of her hiding it, just watching Alice in action for a few moments inspired her. This feeling quickly overtook her - as it usually did - and she turned back to face the brunette, a look of determination in her eyes. "Alice, I need your help." The words fell out of her without hesitation, surprising Mary. She wasn't usually one to speak so candidly with others, especially others that she didn't know very well.
gideonprwtt
Gideon was sweating and panting when he marched along the hallway back to Dedalusâ large living room. Moodyâs defense workshop had been tough, tougher than usual as Gideon had been out of shape for months. He was glad to find out that his reflexes were still sharp, but the physicality of such action had left him out of breath. He wanted some water, snacks, preferably a shower, then after that heâd like to do some drills before calling it a day.
There was a stranger sitting in the living room, and he was so surprised that his wand was pointed at her and a spell was on the tip of his tongue when he realized she was probably an Order member. Hadnât Dumbledore said something about a family emergency of a Mary MacDonald?
âMerlin,â he sighed and dragged his hand over his face. âSorry, sorry. I just got out from a session with Moody. You know how it can go. Mary, yes? I, uh, I donât live here actually.â
He headed to the kitchen area and grabbed himself a glass of water. He didnât remember Mary from Hogwarts, but she seemed like she was in the same year with Lily and the Marauders. She had an air of cautiousness around her, blond hair curving around her face closely like a protector. Gideon knew people like her â had interacted with them numerous times during his school years. People with a secret to keep. People who have been hurt deeply, physically or mentally. Gideon couldnât claim to be an expert, but he figured a little kindness would go a long way.
He sat down on a sofa opposite from her. âHow are you settling in then? Met the screaming portraits yet? Theyâre Dedalusâ great-great-grand uncles, apparently.â
Maryâs heart dropped at the sight of a man ready to attack her without hesitation. She was completely frozen, her hand unable to move the six inches needed to grab her own wand. The breath caught her throat only released when his arm dropped. âOh, um, itâs alright. I understand.â The stammer slowly left her voice as she spoke. âYour reflexes are, um, very good.â She mentally kicked herself for saying something so stupid, but she had been caught completely guard. âYes, Iâm Mary. Um, MacDonald. You must be Gideon?âÂ
She brought her fist up to her forehead and lightly bashed it a few times as he left the room. As far as first impressions go, this wasnât her best. Not only was she embarrassed by the things she said, she was embarrassed that she was unable to react to the position he hadnât meant to put her in. Mary had never been threatened like that before out in the real world. She hadnât fathomed how different it would feel from dueling in the classroom or in training. A feeling of shame rose up to meet the embarrassment as she realized she wasnât ready to be sent on any sort of mission. The part of her that felt like she didnât belong in the Order increased a bit on this afternoon.
Mary put a smile back on her face as he reentered with his glass. âItâs a bit of an adjustment. I havenât really lived communally since Hogwarts, you know?â She gestured her hands in emphasis, having a feeling he'd understand. It was one experience that she knew they all had shared. A shudder escaped her at his mention of the paintings. âUnfortunately, I have. Unfortunately, it was at six in the morning. Unfortunately, they gave me enough of a fright that I also began screaming.â Her shoulders finally began to relax as she recalled that morning. It would have been quite a sight to see, had anyone else been awake. âIâm am very jealous that you donât have to deal with them.âÂ
I wanted to forget the past, but it refused to forget me; it waited for sleep, then cornered me.
Margaret Atwood (via onlinecounsellingcollege)
barestofbones
Edgar stopped by the safehouse because Dumbledore had promised to leave him a book on some sort of muggle carpentry. Somehow he had allowed himself to be sucked into a conversation about needlepoint that blossomed into him getting tips on how to use his hands with wood, and for days he had laughed about the idea of him taking such advice from his former headmaster, day four was the day his boredom made him forget pride. As promised, he found the book under a bowl of fruit on the island, and instead of heading home, he thought to take advantage of the silence surrounding him.
Padding down the hall and into a sitting room, he paused at the open window, then his eyes landed on the blonde sitting in the floor. Mary Macdonald. The corners of his lips turned up, head angling slightly at her question. âOh, Iâm not staying here. Only passing through,â he held up the book and settled on the arm of the chair across from her, and for a moment he was silent, he grin growing wider in the silence.
He hadnât seen her in years, hadnât spoken to her since the night sheâd stormed up to him in the common room at school to confront him on the lie heâd given a certain Slytherin. Edgar couldnât help but wonder if she was still mad all these years later. Clearing his throat, he decided to find out. âSo those rumors about us died down finally,â he began, his hands covering the book as it settled between his legs. His smiled widened enough to reveal teeth, a short laugh escaping. âI can leave if youâre worried about them starting up again.â
If there was one person that Mary had been dreading seeing, it had been Edgar Bones. Their last meeting hadn't been her finest moment. Looking back, she was certain the public display had only exacerbated the rumors. She kept the smile on her lips, but felt it dying from her eyes. "Well, that's too bad. It's nice to see you again Edgar," she said, trying to sound as sincere as possible, a twinge still in her voice.
The smile finally fell from her lips at his remark. She suddenly felt like a sixteen-year-old girl again, being accused of being a slut by the boy she was convinced she was in love with. She remember how much it hurt, "because she had never even had a conversation with Edgar before!" The memory of the way he spoke to her caused a wave discomfort to wash over her. It was a wonder just how much she had put up with, or had been forced to put up with. She wasn't sure which was the truth with memories like these. The line was blurred, and that fact frightened her.
Mary took a quick breath before replying and reminded herself of her goal here. "I'm not so sure they did. I thought I heard a few old women whispering about it in Diagon Alley the other day." She attempted to put a playful smile on her face as she continued. "There's no need for that, but if you're feeling uncomfortable, I would understand."
June 3rd, 1979
It had been a few days since the welcome party, of which Mary had not been in attendance. It had been for the best; she never did well in large social gatherings. A family emergency had kept her busy that evening and, even though Dumbledore had been understanding, she couldnât help but feel like she had already lost a bit of the groupâs trust. She saw how close everyone had grown during that night and already began to feel as though she was on the outside, looking in. It was a feeling she was all too familiar with.
If Mary was being honest with herself, she hadnât been very excited about moving in with a bunch of people. Ever since leaving Hogwarts, she has treasured her independence. Living alone with her best friend had turned out to be the ideal living situation and she wasnât prepared to let that go just yet. The move was necessary, though. If she was going to actively oppose the Death Eaters she would be at an even greater risk, especially considering she had already been targeted once.
Since she had such a difficult time making deep connections with others during her time at Hogwarts, Mary has decided to change her approach. No matter how nervous she gets around the others, she will not retreat into herself. After all, if she was to trust these people with her life, shouldnât they be a part of it? So, she has decided to embrace this change as an opportunity.
In her first real effort in putting herself out there, she has decided that she will be spending none of her free time alone in her room. So, on this afternoon, Mary can be found in the living room enjoying the latest edition of the Daily Prophet. This was her favorite way to spend rainy afternoons. She had opened the window slightly so that sound of the drizzle filled the room and she had a steaming cup of tea on the coffee table in front of her.
Her ears perked up at the sound of footsteps entering the room. She looked up from where she was seated on the floor, her back resting against the couch. âSettled in?â