It's December Again

When can it end

[itsdecemberagain]

I'm so scared of what happens when I'm not there.

[itsdecemberagain]

I am nothing but a vessel,

A human body.

You say care about me

It's for my own good

But you only care about

My physical being

That's all I am worth

[itsdecemberagain]

I want to exist for someone else

Because I'm not enough myself

[itsdecemberagain]

I forgot how to be a person in the midst of all my pain

[itsdecemberagain]

Sometimes I think I'm addicted to the feeling of being left behind

[itsdecemberagain]

It almost feels like a real family

[itsdecemberagain]

How come I can't believe in your promises

[itsdecemberagain]

Everything feels better when I'm not breathing

[itsdecemberagain]

Sometimes when I hold my breath it feels better

But then I exhale and there's not enough air and it's worse all over again

[itsdecemberagain]

I'm so bitter

I miss you and I love you but it's making me bitter and

I don't know who I hate more

You're the one who's lost your family when you left

But why does it feel like I'm the one alone?

[itsdecemberagain]

The air doesn't sit right in my lungs

[itsdecemberagain]

I don't know what to feel anymore

[itsdecemberagain]

can you save me

[itsdecemberagain]

feels like everyone will disappear

and everything will disappear

can’t breathe when i think

even if i’m thinking about

how much i just

want to goddamn breathe

[itsdecemberagain]

Am I a person

[itsdecemberagain]

I'm becoming addicted to dreaming

I'm happiest when it's not real

[itsdecemberagain]

Everything is on fire

Can't you see it burning?

Can you feel the blaze?

I'll cry an ocean

I'll take all the blame

So that my tears

Can put out the flames