A customer licks your nipple during a lap dance. This is the third time tonight. You wonder when it will end.
There are thirteen dancers and two customers. It is hopeless, you say to yourself, opening Neko Atsume at the bar.
The DJ plays you a wack song. Suddenly time stands still. This is the longest four minutes of your life. You curse the fact that you will inevitably be required to tip the son of a bitch out $10 at the end of the night despite this.
Your back is turned to a customer while you’re on stage. You are shaking your ass for him. Suddenly he smacks a dollar onto your bare ass. The bouncer does not notice. He never notices. You “accidentally” knock the customers beer into his lap as revenge.
A customer mocks a girl on stage while complimenting you. You grit your teeth and resist the urge to bury your heel in his crotch until he screams. You give her an extra hug later. She did not deserve that.
You are on your period and have just removed your g string on stage. You give another dancer The Look™ as you spread your legs. She silently flashes you a thumbs up. Your tampon string did not fall out of its neatly tucked position. Nobody can see it. You are safe. This time.
A couple comes to the club. The girlfriend looks miserable, she has clearly been dragged along. You can hear her call you a trashy pig from a mile away. You almost feel bad for her.
A baby stripper has coated the pole with lotion and her body glitter is all over the stage, and now it’s all over everyone else too. This is what hell looks like.
A customer tells you that you’re too smart to be working in a place like this. What he doesn’t know is that you’ve already strategically plotted the ways you will manipulate him into emptying his bank account. You will leave with fat stacks of cash. He will go home drunk and broke.
You take someone to do a lap dance. He is wearing basketball shorts. You switch from contact to air dance the moment you feel every intricate detail of his boner against your ass.
A group of sloppy straight female customers sits at the stage. They scream and get embarrassingly rowdy every time you bust out a move. One of them tries to “tip” you by putting a dollar between her boobs to see if she can force you to take it out with your mouth. You don’t need the dollar that badly.
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