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@iwasabrokenboy
Doctor Who: 11 Doctors, 11 Stories: Eoin Colfer-The First Doctor: A Big Hand for the Doctor
Artemis: *arranges business meeting for extremely profitable venture*
Spiro: *outwits him, steals Cube, fills restaurant with hitmen, kills Butler, Artemis never gets his lunch*
Artemis: I came out to have a good time but I'm honestly feeling so attacked right now
July 10, 2014 - It has been 2 years since The Last Guardian was released, but some things will never change…
So do you ever think we will know who runs dearhollyshort?
Nope not ever (though I know someone who knows, the evil overlord of the tumblr fowldom) I'm afraid it would forever be one of the fowldom's greatest secret which even the greatest of us would be unworthy of. *insert ominous music* tbh there's a tiny part of me that think she's legit holly short
Am I the only one who sometimes think about dearhollyshort in real life I can't even, I swear sometimes I see her as hannah montana living a normal human life among normal humans when really she has this rp blog with realistic pictures i mean don't you just love her and then there's this whole LEP of them like there's trouble and foaly too and i can't how can they even what
boy did i miss the fandom
so i've been away for a while and now i frolic the tag and its the usual quotes from fangathering, people looking for fowldom, occasional damiarty, high as coke posts from mooti and leigh's seductive pie icon i can't even nothing new here missed you cray cray guys and it's 4 in the morning
Opal Koboi: *sleeps for over a year* *plots world domination and revenge on all her arch enemies*
Me: *takes a ten minute nap* *forgets what century it is*
just stoppin by the fowldom and dropping this dichromatic-eyed picture of Benedict Cumberbatch I found (source would be found here once I actually find the source)
"Stay back, human. You don’t know what you’re dealing with."
Angeline gets more than what she bargained for
A/N: Something I came up with after obsessing on that post about Damiarty PDA
Artemis gave the poor girl a forced and cold smile. The girl, who was the daughter of a middle eastern oil tycoon, took an involuntary step backward. In fairness to Angeline, the Fowl matriarch maintained her dignified air.
"It's a pleasure to meet you, Artemis. I, uh - please excuse me. I think I saw an acquaintance. I must go greet him." The girl's smile was only slightly warmer than Artemis' before she scurried- or more accurately, escaped- away.
Angeline sighed. That was the sixteenth girl her son has flipped off. "Did I not raise you to be a gentleman, Artemis?"
A twinge of guilt washed over the genius. "I'm sorry, mother. But you have to stop pushing every eligible female in my face."
"You're embarrassing me, Artemis. The Ceskovs didn't come to the London gala after you left Cecille alone at the opera."
"You know my opinion about your socialite friends." Artemis knew it was childish, but he really was fed up of his mother's set ups.
Angeline was fed up too. "Can't you make your mom happy for once?"
"Mother,"
"There must be someone here who catches your fancy. I don't care if it's the most scientific person. Just dance with someone tonight, Artemis, and I'll stop pestering."
He was a good son to Angeline, but this was one matter he was firm on so she was more than surprised when Artemis nodded. Barely believing it, she watched her son walk across the ball room.
xxx
Damian hovered within Bruce's eyesight, ready to be summoned and introduced to the president of this and the wife of that. Though a minor part of him abhorred the whole thing, all he really was is painfully bored.
From across the room, he watched another exotic looking girl kiss Artemis on the cheeks while Angeline cooed behind them. He knew the matriarch was behind it, but still a slight annoyance hovered at the base of his skull.
Finally the girl left, and the annoyance cleared. Damian shifted his attention back to Bruce.
"Dance with me?"
Damian bit his lip in annoyance. These European girls were brazen.
He looked up. Artemis Fowl stood before him, looking as if he asked about the weather. Surprise flickered across Damian's features, causing a smirk to materialize on the Fowl's.
"Are you serious?"
Artemis sighed. "You don't have to. It's just mother. She promised to stop giving me girlfriends if I dance with someone tonight."
"I'm pretty sure she meant a duchess or an heiress, Art. Not Bruce Wayne's strikingly handsome son."
Artemis gave a subtle scowl. Through the crowd, he saw his mother's face fall. At least his father would be happy; he was finally conversing with Bruce Wayne's insufferable son.
Hands wrapped around his pale ones. This time it was Artemis who was caught off guard. Damian smirked smugly.
"Let's shut your mother up."
Artemis' eyebrows rose. "Damian, are you serious? All of western Europe is here."
"Are you ashamed of me?" He challenged.
"No," Artemis quickly said. "That's not what I meant."
"Then come on." He lead Artemis by the hand to the middle of the ball, where three to four more couples were dancing.
For once in his life, Artemis let Damian take the upper hand. The Wayne faced him, not letting go of Art's right hand and placing his left on his partner's shoulder blade.
The world went quiet, with only the music flowing around the room. Literally. One by one, the other dancers stopped to watch. Phones were whipped out one by one. Every eye on the room followed the two indifferent heirs waltz across the floor.
"You're awfully quiet." Damian said nonchalantly, starting the obligatory waltz small talk.
"You know how to dance." Artemis commented, diverting the topic.
"Well, I am Boy Wonder." Damian wiggled an eyebrow once. "For a physically inept vampire, you're not bad yourself."
"It's something you pick up if you attend a hundred galas since childhood."
They went silent, feet moving to the flow of the dance. One two three, one two three.
Artemis broke into a grin. "Look at mother. She's horrified." And then the smile widened. "Our fathers are together. They're frozen in shock."
"They'll get over it." Damian said, spinning Artemis once.
"I'll go introduce you. Is that okay?"
Damian flashed a grin. "Of course."
The waltz ended, and the world emerged from its muteness. The onlookers erupted into shameless whispers, eyes following the two as they existed the dance floor.
Artemis Fowl AU where everything is the same except Artemis forces everyone to call him Artemis “Mutha Fuckin” Fowl
[to Spiro] My name is Artemis Mutha Fuckin Fowl, and I hunted you
Wherein Holly finds out
((((in other news: this damiarty thing has escalated quickly))))
"This Wayne," Artemis spat out the name. "is the most arrogant, self-absorbed brat. He struts around St. Bartleby's like he's superior to everyone else, just because of his surname."
Holly sighed; finally, Artemis ended his long rant. The mud man usually conversed with her about mundane, normal person stuff such as school mates mainly because she had insisted that he leave her out of his scientific hooplah, so the prattle was normal. But Holly knew better. She could practically smell the truth all the way from Haven.
"Arrogant, self-absorbed, thinks he's above everyone else. Are you sure you're describing this Wayne kid? Or are you describing yourself?"
Artemis bristled. "I am nothing like that Damian." Artemis said even though he knew Holly had concluded correctly. Damian acted too much like him, and it irked him that there was another flippant boy who looked down on everybody roaming the halls. Albeit this one didn't seem to attract animosity from the normal students. Those foolish St. Bartleby's boys actually worship the little pain. And as if their similarities wasn't annoying enough, Damian had to be good at one thing he was worst at: physical activity.
At the thought of the physical activity, Artemis remembered the PE class earlier that day. The boy felt a twinge of...something. He did not know what it was, but blood had rushed to his cheeks, making his face tingle. The feeling only served to enrage him further.
"Sounds like Arty's got a crush."
Laughter erupted from Holly as she heard Artemis choke incoherently on the other end of the line. She wished they were on video call; the whelp's face must be priceless.
Holly's statement came out of nowhere. Artemis had to muster all the self-control in the world so he could hold on to the communicator, rather than throw it across the room.
"I do not have a crush on Damian Wayne."
"Uhuh."
"I am Artemis Fowl the Second. I do not get crushes. You should know that Holly. Or don't know who you're talking too?"
"Uhuh."
Holly was grinning like a loonatic.
"Holly, are you still on the line?"
"We have to teach you to act normally around Damian. Gods help it if you act all in denial like you are now around Damian. And Artemis, now fighting, okay? What are you, fifth grade?"
Artemis grimaced. He was never going to hear the end of this.
I’m, I’m pretty happy with how this came out (for once)??? So I was listening to Lorde when I realized this song fitted them perfectly, and thus fanart was born……Damiarty will be the death of me, i s2g
Bonus (Here are the individual pieces):
[CRASHES THROUGH THE WINDOW] YOUR DAMIARTY SNIPPETS WERE AWESOME, AND LET ME JUST SAY THAT YOU'VE GOT DAMIAN'S SNOBBISH ARROGANCE DOWN PAT. LET ME LOVE YOOOOOOOOOU
EHEHEHEHEHE
I was really nervous on getting him OOC, because I'm used to writing Howl which I know like the back of my hand and to write someone I haven't actually read in cannon let alone obsessed about for years was well. there. Come forth and love me because you have no idea how much how i love you and your art and the gift of damiarty to this fandom bless you.
The locker room reeked of adolescent male sweat and stupidity, a smell Artemis Fowl the Second found quite disagreeable. Amidst the bustle and laughter of the other boys, Artemis shrugged off a school issued gym uniform. Pulling the t-shirt over his head and flinging it in to his locker. Next came the shorts which he tossed into the locker with an unnecessary amount of force. Normally he would take more pride in his possessions and carefully fold up the uniform, but at the moment the Irish teenager was furious and taking it out on his hideous gym shorts made him feel better. The reason for Artemis’s frustration was the hungry set of eyes boring holes into his back. Those eyes belonged to one Damian Wayne...
PREQUEL: Damian's First Day
“…Damian Wayne.”
At the word Wayne, Artemis looked up. He knew that last name. It was a little more influential than the rest of the pitiful hotelier, stock broker, business tycoon etc etc family names at St. Bartleby’s.
Artemis wasn’t the only one who recognized the last name. The classroom, full of graduating heirs about to go off and inherit the family business, coalesced into pique and interest. Their noisy, rowdy indifference bordering on disrespect was now gone; all eyes were on the black haired, lean boy standing arrogantly in front of the class.
“Well, Damian, would you like to introduce yourself?” The teacher said. The question was stupid, as he had introduced the newcomer already.
The Damian boy surveyed the room, as a king would survey his peasant subjects. His gaze was bored, sweeping slowly from left to right. Finding nothing of note, Damian, without even an acknowledgement or look to the teacher, swaggered his way to the next available seat.
Artemis was impressed. Unlike the other spoiled brats who made it a whim to act above everyone else, the Wayne didn’t try too hard and actually pulled it off. A trailing thought hovered past Artemis: the new student reminded Artemis of himself.
Artemis approval was short-lived, as Damian Wayne decided to sit down beside him. No one ever sat in the back row except Artemis Fowl II. It was his territory. Artemis waved off his immature annoyance; he knew there were no other vacant seats in the room. Heaven help him if that Damian tried to make friends. He could almost imagine the pitiful “Hello, I’m Damian.” Americans.
An hour later, the bell rang. All the students made their way out of the room, including Damian Wayne, who had spent the class with an expression that lorded over everything, not speaking a word to anyone. His silence left Artemis feeling disappointed, as his expectations were not met.
But really, Artemis was impressed.
He rose, taking out his phone as he left the classroom. In the search box of his expansive personal database, he typed Damian Wayne. At the back of his mind, Artemis took note of the fact that he was actually spending time and mind space for the new student. Perhaps it was the illustrious last name, or the sight of him expertly maneuvering a long pencil through his lithe fingers for the past one hour in class.