Everything will play out exactly how it’s supposed to

if i look back, i am lost
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@iwriterudewords
Everything will play out exactly how it’s supposed to
withdraw from society. pass the time by peering out of the window at the snow. listen to simon and garfunkel. refuse to consume anything other than cigarettes and sweet tea. spend the day wearing pyjamas and a duvet. ignore reality. shut the door to the outside world. shrink into yourself. pretend to be asleep when anyone tries to make social contact. stare at maps and globes and wish yourself elsewhere. sleep. worry about the little things until your body shivers and shakes. pray for things you know you can never have. immerse yourself in the past. stare at blank word documents. think about what could have been. turn clocks around and lose track of time. cry quietly. slowly and silently fade away.