The J says "Grr"

[j-grrgrowlind-oh]

#thenaughtypottywitch https://www.instagram.com/p/CPz2IffpwSy/?utm_medium=tumblr

[j-grrgrowlind-oh]

[j-grrgrowlind-oh]

she handed me back my heart without making eye contact there was still a tenderness in her fingertips an unspoken apology for letting go a slight quiver in her voice carried the words that pierced through the hollow of my chest ... the tale of our forever abruptly ended the chapter cut off mid-sentence the remaining pages left longing for the echo of words waiting to bounce back from eternities edge for any words to break the uncomfortable silence ... I cracked and I crumbled until there was nothing left but rubble and smoke and ash and a pain as heavy as it was empty a pain that stretched from the weak tremble of my heart past the unknown year of my inevitable death ... I don’t remember much of the pain in detail or how sleepless the nights were how bad the dreams got I remember it hurting in a place I believed it would never hurt again hurting in a way I never thought would go away a hurt I never thought I would be able to live with ... time passed slowly burning what would never be again her ghost was on every corner in every line in every car at ever stop light my body kept going through the motions of life but I was... I was... I really don’t recall what or who I was some fraction of who I use to be and nothing of who I thought I would become ... eventually I flew out to visit my parents for four days to try and regroup and recollect and rebuild and distract myself those four days turned into a week and then a month and the idea of going back... back to where both she and her ghost lived... well... the month turned to years and those years are still pilling up ... I tried drinking no.... I drank I drank a lot the days became blurs and it stopped hurting on the nights I couldn’t recall or remember but the pain was still there still empty still heavy when my blood was absent of booze and my head full of longing for the things that would never be ... and time crawled ... I fell in love with a new face a new heart and it was wild and turbulent and short lived and another hand reached into my wreckage and pulled out my heart and held it for a moment and it felt like love and we played pre (at Roots Coffeehouse) https://www.instagram.com/p/CHEfZ1hJRCJ/?igshid=1wnuhfax0stoz

[j-grrgrowlind-oh]

I remember being a kid and wishing I could sleep with my eyes open... Aidans eyes are always open, I try to close them and they open back up... https://www.instagram.com/p/B-2aGbBJxGf/?igshid=1qvl561l7a8yt

[j-grrgrowlind-oh]

more than I expexted twelve years ago you fell from your mothers belly like a soft prayer of small miracles all of heaven contained within the wonder sparkling in your eyes everything that could be more than I expected happiness more abundant than infinite beautiful in every sense that love can be defined I have never appreciated the air in my lungs or the blood in my veins or the pulse and rhythm of my heart more than the first time I held you or the last time I heard you laugh twelve years pasted so quickly and I am torn equally between wishing I could stop time and the excitement of watching you grow the impatience for seeing who you will become you are both hope and the future twelve years of being the luckiest dad the happiest father it often feels like you have been teaching me more than I will ever be able to teach you you have made it so easy life so joyous your heart is a treasure trove of kindness your soul a gentle campaign of patience your intellect sharp with both wisdom and humor what a gift it has been to love you to be loved by you twelve years of everything that could be more than I expected https://www.instagram.com/p/B-V1leWpWvX/?igshid=s01ylc3xty9

[j-grrgrowlind-oh]

#stayathome #essentialemployee https://www.instagram.com/p/B-TWJy3p9gV/?igshid=1iyid135fssyu

[j-grrgrowlind-oh]

and a rockstar is born... https://www.instagram.com/p/B-TQLC8JzjY/?igshid=ofq73syupmi4

[j-grrgrowlind-oh]

#eurekacrate #woodenukulele https://www.instagram.com/p/B-S7BZWpBDz/?igshid=kzmjcoifgv3

[j-grrgrowlind-oh]

the wifi at this place is TERRIBLE, it looks like no one has even tried to clean it up in years (the cobwebs literally have cobwebs), none of the so called art hanging on the walls looks finished, theres a strange looking guy with an unkempt beard walking around grumbling under his breath and constantly scratching his butt.... but at least they have some @westoakcoffee from @trinitystcoffee ( you have to make it yourself, the weird guy here tries to put the ground in a mug, stir it like chocolate milk mix and the microwave it... f$#@ing idiot) https://www.instagram.com/p/B-Sb7Tkp-o_/?igshid=bj3bo3uv37s2

[j-grrgrowlind-oh]

#calvinandhobbes #billwatterson https://www.instagram.com/p/B-PVpa2JBjn/?igshid=1frpfjoxhhvd0

[j-grrgrowlind-oh]

#ofmiceandmarch #ofmiceandmarchrepost #ofmiceandmarchlazy #peterpan #captinhook #shadow #doyoubelieve #doyoubelieveinfairies #ibelieve https://www.instagram.com/p/B-M8oR5Jw5X/?igshid=1c82ha14r0ubh

[j-grrgrowlind-oh]

#ofmiceandmarch #ofmiceandmarchrepost #ofmiceandmarchlazy #peterpan #shadow #doyoubelieve #doyoubelieveinfairies #ibelieve https://www.instagram.com/p/B-KOWFBpI1M/?igshid=14tfilr1ro09x

[j-grrgrowlind-oh]

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[j-grrgrowlind-oh]

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[j-grrgrowlind-oh]

#ofmiceandmarch #ofmiceandmarchrepost #ofmiceandmarchlazy #peterpan #shadow #doyoubelieve #doyoubelieveinfairies #ibelieve https://www.instagram.com/p/B9-ia6spGFX/?igshid=16ueft0n608mo

[j-grrgrowlind-oh]

#ofmiceandmarch #ofmiceandmarch2020 #thesimpsons #marge #margesimpson https://www.instagram.com/p/B95j53GJNdn/?igshid=1kco2bm1ohzs6

[j-grrgrowlind-oh]

#ofmiceandmarch #ofmiceandmarch2020 #thesimpsons #homer #homersimpson #donut #colossaldonut https://www.instagram.com/p/B90jYmpJADJ/?igshid=1276b85t8rh98