Hi :) I'm 17, an active member of the church, and a punk/grunge kid living in Utah. I don't have piercings or tattoos, but I do wear shirts of bands and such that have people with tats and piercings. I also very obviously dress like my "stereotype" while staying modest. The youth and a few older people in my ward are very judgemental and make me feel bad about my choices. I hate going to yw's and church because I get made fun of. I thought we were all supposed to love each other in the church :(
I know EXACTLY how you feel. Well, to some degree. Like you i was into the music scene, though i was more into alternative music. I wore band tshirts, went to tons of concerts (like my friends and i were really intense about it), dyed parts of my hair all kinds of colors IE teal, blue, bleached blond, red, purple etc… Only i’m from idaho, but pretty similar to utah. Like you people in my ward would be very judgmental and usually i would end up sitting by myself. I started to feel bad because i wasn’t the “stereotypical mormon girl” even though i was trying my best to be a good person. One day when i was feeling particularly down i asked myself ” Courtney, why do you go to church?” (yes i talk to myself every so often) i thought about it and i came up with these reasons
1. to come closer to the savior
3. to get away from the craziness of the world
I realized, i didn’t go to church for the people, i went to take the sacrament and come closer to the savior. After i made that decision in my head it got easier. What i realized is that the savior doesn’t care what you look like, as long as you’re there trying to become better. Everyone in this life has challenges they need to overcome, whether thats to not judge others by what they look like, being more charitable, or being more patient etc…. There will always be those who judge, and we are supposed to love others but sometimes people need to work on those christlike attributes. Whats more important is that you’re happy, being yourself and trying to be like the savior regardless of what you look like. Keep being yourself and do what makes you happy and not what others think you should be.
Now, i’m still very into music. i don’t dye my hair crazy colors anymore (mainly because of the damage it’s done to my hair) i still go to concerts and i still have those same reasons as to why i go to church, and i’m happy. I’m happy being me, because there’s none other like me and i really don’t care what people think as long as i’m happy and trying to be a better person. Really, if others are judging then they have things to work on, and i really shouldn’t worry about it. So, keep being you, keep going to church and try not to worry about what others think, i know it’s hard but you can do it! the most important thing is that the savior wants you there.
