“Babe, ya alarm has been going off for a minute now,” he complained through his sleep. I’d been letting it go off for the past 10 minutes without hitting the snooze button because honestly I’m not ready for this day & what it has to bring moving forward. Funerals ain’t for me & I vowed on the day of my mother’s funeral I would never attend one again, but here we are.
“Sorry,” I mumbled, wiping the tears that managed to slip from my eyes just thinking about it. Grabbing my phone from under my pillow I turned the sound off returning the room back to it’s silent state. Flipping the covers off my body I sat up throwing my feet off the bed watching as they dangled & swung back and forth. Feeling my eyes water yet again I looked up at the ceiling trying my best to hold them back but failed miserably as they streamed down my face.
Losing Tre brings a different type of pain I didn’t even feel when my mom died & I know it sounds bad but with her I guess I was just more prepared. Her fight with cancer made it easier to accept her death even though it hurt like hell to lose her, but with Tre I’m still hurt, angry, & confused by it. I just knew he was invincible so I never thought this day would come, but life has its way of humbling you and the people around you. I’m heartbroken & I’ll never feel whole again because they took half of me away when they pulled that trigger. I’m just happy he knows that King & I loved him through it all.
“Babe,” Dom yelled, scaring me out of my thoughts.
“Yea,” I answered looking back at him wiping my face. He breathed out sitting up in the bed next to me & wrapped his arms around my shoulders pulling me in.
“Talk to me babe. You haven’t said much since you got the news & that’s not good.” he said rubbing my back. It’s true, I haven’t really opened up to anyone & I’ve been moving like everything is fine when it’s not.
“I’m fine babe, I just wanna get this day over with. You good?” I asked looking over at him he nodded.
“If I’m being honest babe this shit is hitting me. That was my dog at one point & I know for the sake of keeping you happy time would’ve got us back to that,” he paused, shaking his head as a tear rolled down his cheek.
“I just wish it would’ve happened sooner,” I sighed hugging him. I was shocked to say the least but it does feel good to know despite their beef Dom does feel a way about Tre’s death. I just wish hearing him open up would make me but for some reason I can’t.
“Thank you babe for telling me that, & for just being here,” I said wiping his tears he nodded.
“I’m gon always be here babe & I ain’t gon pressure you but when you are ready to talk just know I’m here,” he said I nodded.
“I know babe, it’s just I don’t even know where to begin & I appreciate all you’ve been doing for me this past week, trying to make things better,” I paused grabbing his hands.
“But if I’m being honest my main focus right now is King. He’s gonna need me more than anything & I’m gon always make sure he’s good,” I said he nodded
“Yea but who’s gonna make sure you’re good?” he questioned staring at me.
“I’ll be fine babe I promise & when I’m not you’ll be the first to know,” I assured him he nodded as I stood to my feet & walked towards the door.
“Where you going?” he asked me, “To check on King, make sure he’s up & getting ready,” I informed him.
“Aight Ima go shower,” he said I nodded. Turning on my heels he grabbed my hand and pulled me back into him.
“You know I got you right?” he asked, looking down on me.
“Yea, but right now babe you need to get a toothbrush,” I joked, making him bust out laughing.
“You really tryna play me right now, yours ain’t to fresh either yuck mouth,” he teased as we laughed
“It’s good to see you smile,” he said interlocking our hands.
“Thank you,” I said kissing his lips before walking out the room.
Knocking on King’s door I waited a few seconds hearing him shuffle around in his room before knocking again only this time cracking the door open poking my head in.
“King,” I called out opening the door to see him on the phone & proceeded to walk in.
“Yea,” he answered with the phone to his ear.
“You ain’t hear me knock?” I asked, he placed his finger up silencing me. I sucked my teeth waving him off and plopped down on his bed. He took the phone off his ear and placed it on speaker revealing my dad’s voice.
“Is Lena with you?” I heard him ask
“Yea she just walked in,” King answered, I sighed standing to my feet and walked over to where he stood. I wasn’t expecting my dad to call so soon, I mean this is about to send me on another emotional roller coaster I’m not ready for.
“Baby girl you there?” he asked
“Yea, hey pops,” I greeted fanning my eyes before the waterworks began.
“How you feeling?” he asked me, “I’m okay,” I paused as my voice cracked.
“C'mon baby clean them tears up, you gon have me in here crying,” he said, making us laugh a bit.
“I’m sorry pops, I just wish you were here for this,” I expressed. I can’t even imagine what my dad is going through right now. From being locked up, to losing his wife while away & now losing his first born, it’s a fucked up cycle I wish he didn’t have to endure.
“I wish I was there too & I’m sorry I’m not,” he paused as his voice cracked.
“I just wanted to call and check on y'all see how yall are doing,”
“I’m okay pops, it’s just hard to believe this day is actually here you know?” I questioned
“Yea I know & it’s unfortunate it had to be Tre,” he sighed
“How are you dad?” King asked him
“Honestly I’m not good, I’m taking this shit hard especially since I’m not there for y'all the way I should be. I’m trying everything in my power to come home cause I’ll be damned if something else happens that I can’t control,” he paused taking a deep breath
“Losing your mother with me being in here and now Tre, I can’t take this shit. I need and want y'all to do & be better than what we were. I’m sorry I couldn’t be a better example because look at where we are now?” his voice shook, by this time we were all in tears. It hurts hearing my dad talk like this and blame himself because I couldn’t have asked for a better person to be my dad. If it wasn’t for him & everything he taught us we wouldn’t have shit so I don’t fault him for anything.
“This ain’t on you though pops,” King spoke through tears. “Except it is King, had I made better life choices Tre wouldn’t be dead,”
“It’s not pop & you don’t know that I mean look at where we’re from,” King paused wiping his face.
“This is on the nigga who decided to pull that trigger. We couldn’t have asked for a better dad, you did everything right regardless of where you’re at right now so please don’t blame yourself because we don’t blame you,” he said as the automated voice suddenly interrupted reminding us we have 2 minutes left of our call. These timed calls are a bitch.
“Look I love y'all & give Tre all my love,” he said
“Aight, I’ll call y'all later,” he said before hanging up.
“You good?” I asked. He nodded his head, running his hands down his face.
“Yea I’m straight sis, what about you?” he asked me I nodded grabbing his hand
“You know I love you right?” I asked him, he chuckled, shaking his head.
“Yea, I love you too sis,”
“All this shit is the reason Tre & I have been so hard on you to stay focused on school, ball, & your music,” I reminded him.
“I know that Lena & I will but now I also gotta step up, something Tre also stayed on me for, so just know I got you Lena. I got us.” he said confusing me. Hearing him talk like that only meant one thing & I’m not having that shit. I’ll be damned if King gets caught up in The Mob lifestyle.
From the moment I found out my mom was pregnant with King I was connected at the hip & when she gave birth couldn’t nobody tell me shit, he’s really my son. I’ve been so protective over him for not only my sake but his too, he’s his own man of course but he’s the perfect mix of both my dad & Tre and that’s what scares me the most. Joining The Mob wasn’t even supposed to be Tre’s life and it damn sure ain’t about to become Kings regardless of what he says Tre prepared him for, especially when I know that’s the last thing Tre would have wanted for him.
“First of all King I got us, you just need to stay focused so promise me you’re not gon be out here doing anything stupid like joining the fucking mob because I am not dumb,” I said he smiled shaking his head and kissed my cheek.
“I won’t Lena, you got my word,” he said but I wasn’t convinced. I’ll just have to take his word for now but with King ain’t no telling what he’ll do.
“Aight finish getting ready,” I instructed before leaving his room.
“Yo Lena look,” King said tapping me. Picking my head up he pointed out the window at the Church parking lot. It was almost filled to capacity which caused the rest of the cars trying to get in to park wherever they see fit.
“Wow,” I smiled looking out at the turnout. Tre was popular no doubt about it and although it’s a shock to see I’m not surprised by the amount of people here right now. Tre’s death affected everybody whether they knew him personally or not so to see this outcome warms my heart.
“I know he’s happy looking down at this,” King smiled
“That sun ain’t shining bright for no reason,” Dom paused shaking his head.
“Tre always said if his shit not packed out, start everything over,” he added, making us laugh.
“You ready?” Dom asked looking over at me I nodded turning around in my seat and faced King.
“Yea, let’s go,” he breathed out as he and Dom stepped out of the car. Watching as Dom walked over to my side I took a deep breath and stepped out once he opened the door for me.
“You speak to Nas or Rocky to see where they at?” King asked looking down on his phone. Rocky and Nas are Tre’s best friends who also run The Mob with him.
“Yea, Nas texted me and told me he was on his way when we left the house, Rocky literally just texted me right now and said he’s about to pull up.” I informed him looking down on my phone.
“Ima go see how the Church looks, if they are ready for us” Dom said.
“Thanks babe,” I said kissing him and watched as he walked off.
“Lena,” my best friends Kennedi & Trinese called out. I turned around and smiled as they walked up to me. Kennedi is Nas’ little sister and literally my other half we met Trinese in second grade and have been three peas in a pod ever since.
“Hey,” I said hugging them. “Hey boo, how are you feeling?” Ken asked me I shrugged
“I’m just ready to get this over with honestly, what about y'all?” I asked them
“It’s just weird us being here, Tre is the last person I would have expected this to happen to,” Trini said I nodded.
“Yea I know,” I said shaking my head noticing as Nas walked off having what looked to be a heated conversation on the phone with Rocky not too far behind him. Nas & Rocky being in Tre’s life meant they were in my & King’s life as well, it feels good gaining two brothers I didn’t know I needed though Nas & I hold a different relationship. He’s my best friend and quite frankly the only person I’ve been able to open up to about Tre’s death.
“What’s their problem?” I asked Kenni
“Remember my cousin I told you about that was locked up in Philly?” she questioned, I nodded.
“He was supposed to get out today but he got into some shit that pushed his release back another week so Nas is tight,” she explained
“Damn that sucks Kenni, I’m sorry,” I said
“What he do?” Trini asked I chuckled at her nosy ass.
“I don’t know but Nas thinks it has everything to do with him not being able to be here,” I grew confused
“I’m lost,” I stated. “He knew Tre, according to Nas they were mad close,” she said as they approached us.
“Wussup sis,” Rocky said, hugging me then walked off to greet King.
“Big head,” Nas said, walking up to me. “Hey knucklehead,” I smiled. He chuckled and pulled me into a hug.
“How you feeling?” he asked me.
“I’m okay I guess, I’m just tryna get through this day ready for it to be over. What about you?” I asked him he shrugged.
“Same I guess, worried about you and King honestly. How is he?” he asked me.
“He claims he’s good and right now his mind is set on stepping up because according to him Tre prepared him for this moment,” I said he chuckled, shaking his head.
“What he mean by that?” he asked me. “Don’t play dumb Nas, it has everything to do with The Mob and I’ll be damned if he goes down that road, especially knowing Tre ain’t want him to,” I said shaking my head.
“I don’t wanna have to go through this shit again Nas because if something happens to King,” I paused as my voice cracked Nas sighed and pulled me in.
“Look Lena you know I got you and King & you have my word that King won’t get involved in this shit,” he said
“Thank you,” I said wiping my eyes.
“They’re ready for us babe,” Dom said, walking up to me. I breathed out nodding and grabbed both his and King’s hand. It really didn’t hit me until just now that this is the last time I’m really gonna see my brother again.
From this day forward I don’t really know how life is gonna turn out but I know I gotta make Tre proud so here’s till we meet again.
germansingergirl
stormborns
2087
gracieabrams
snowghoul
gummygunk
dailybridgerton
