Hello! I'm opening up writing requests for new and exciting fic! If you have a janejake concept you'd like to see explored in (at minimum) 1000 words in a fic, submit them through my ask! :3
Thanks for being a cool artist - and drawing what you want when you want. If it were up to me you'd be a zillionaire based strictly in your power over yuri...
candy!jane wants crockercorp to be more popular with the kids so she makes tavvy do tiktoks for her. imagine in your head. the sad sight of tavvy doing The Griddy desperate for approval from his mother
despite being JaneJake Hetslop's strongest soldier, your favorite blog runner is transfemme and queer as hell.
It's also my birthday this month! please send me warm wishes and images of janejake you want me to see on the 23rd. I plan to get back to work on more writing very soon, as well as doing some jake kinnie activities! :) I'm gonna watch Avatar for the first time in like. 20 years.
I hope this month treats y'all well! 💚🩵
Thank you for making post-canon fanfic that’s not DirkJake or GamJane. I love the way you write Jane, too. If you’re still taking fanfic requests, could you write something with Jane and Jake on the meat ship with Jake being unhinged? It can NSFW or SFW.
Anon, thank you! I have a lot of problems with DirkJake as a ship, from a personal Lived Experience perspective (been there, done that, came out of it with lasting trauma), and I personally just wanted to create something fun and self-indulgent and sweet with my first fic, as I didn't see anything like it on AO3 at the time. I'm really glad you've enjoyed my work thus far!
I've been sitting with your request since I received it and tried cracking at this every few days since. As mentioned in a previous update, I'm not exactly doin' so hot right now, and writing Jake and Jane in a very vulnerable position right now has been rough. I want you to have this in a timely manner, so please try to enjoy the heartache I've pulled from my chest and splattered onto the page. More thoughts at the end.
The Alpha Kids Aren’t Alright
Jake knew exactly how long he and everyone else had been on the Lifeboat.
Three years, six months, 13 days, 7 hours, 40 minutes. But who was counting? Certainly not Jake. Certainly not the man who had spent the past three years, six months, 13 days, 7 hours, and forty… one minutes waiting for the inevitable blow waiting for him at the end of the journey.
One has a lot of free time to watch movies in three years, six months, 13 days, 7 hours, and 41 minutes, and Jake had one hell of a backlog in the entirety of the surviving films of Planet Earth, and an infinitely long lifespan in which to watch them. Within the first year, Jake had finally gotten around to watching Akira Kurosawa’s body of work, a suggestion once given by Dirk without ever having actually seen any of these films himself. These days, Jake felt like Toshiro Mifune at the end of Throne of Blood, constantly bug-eyed, pelted with arrows, hiding around every corner. It’s not so much the fate at the end of the tunnel that haunts him as much as the fact that all he can do is wait. To hear that voice in his head again. For the other shoe to drop.
The ship had, unfortunately, had their Friday (as if the day of the week even mattered anymore) movie nights commandeered into Jake’s command. Everyone had stopped showing a while back. For the third week in a row, Jake came out of his and Jane’s room in his red boxer-briefs and sock-garters, sat down on the inflatable couch next to Jane, held her hand softly, and put on The Cat in the Hat. A dull smile crept across his face as they watched together.
“Janey, don’t you love Mike Myers? Isn’t he simply delightful?” he said, soft and hoarse.
“Uh.”
Jane didn’t quite know how to say she was more fond of the man in the Austin Powers films. Something about this film had made the scrawny, hairy man that reminded her so much of Jake when they were young look grotesque. The handheld dolly zooms onto a stiff face that filled the screen constantly, that wheeze of a laugh, the way everything was so clearly an artifice, from the whitened muzzle of his face to his visibly dirty, hairy feet with no pawpads, made him horrifying.
“Yeah, I uh… I think he’s great, dear.”
“This is my favorite movie of all time.” There was no joy in Jake’s voice. “I love how Kelly Preston clearly wants diddly squat to do with this movie. She had the right idea getting out fifteen minutes in. She was great in Battlefield Earth. I like when they make her blue. 'Cuz of the light.”
Another awful, wicked laugh emanates from the ship’s powerful speaker systems, and Jane recoils. Jake doesn’t even flinch as he peeps the horrors. “Jake… don’t you think we should maybe turn this down?” She squeezed his hand a little tighter than normal, putting a free hand on his bicep.
Jake put his clearly-exhausted face in his clearly-worn hands. “Sure.” His voice sounds so pathetic when it’s muffled. “Just turn it off.”
Jane breathes the biggest sigh of relief Jake has ever heard before he hears her scramble for the remote, before he changes his mind. They stood there, silent a moment. She wants to touch him, but she can't bring herself to reach out her hand. “Do you just want to lay down with me for a minute?”
“Yeah.”
The pair laid there for a moment, in the cold dark of their bedroom, on opposite sides of the bed. Jake was silent, still, practically dead. The only hint he showed any signs of life was the shallow sound of his breathing.
“Jake.” Jane’s voice was soft, burdened with worry.
“Darling.”
She tried to put a hand on his chest, but he caught her hand gently, placing it on her side of the bed. The motion stung. “I love you.”
“I know.” His voice somehow managed to sound even more hollow as he turned away from her.
Jane tries to search her mind for when things started to fall apart for them and comes up short. Three years. They’d been hurtling through space together for so long, knowing something difficult to swallow was waiting for them at the end of all this. She touched the side of his face, feeling the brush-bristle hairs of his beard, wild and light around the edges. “I miss you.” The words slide out before she can stop the thought from happening.
“I’m right here, Janey.”
And then it all comes tumbling out of her. “No you’re not, Jake. You haven’t been you in years. You’ve been a shambolic corpse since we were months into this trip.” She grabbed his shoulder and forced him to turn over, staring him down. “What the hell is wrong with you? You’ve been avoiding contact with everybody else on this ship and they’re worried about you. I can’t keep telling Roxy that it’s just a blue period. He’s terrified you’re going to do something rash… It’s been two years of this, Jake. Two years of you only shuffling out of bed for routine food and drink and movies, movies you don’t even enjoy anymore.” Her throat burned. “What’re you so goddamn scared of?”
Jake’s voice finally rose above a whisper, impatient, coarse. “Do you have any idea what it’s like to know that at the end of this little fancy flight, we're going to do something to Dirk? To know there’s a greater-than-zero-percent chance I will have to look that chap in his eyes, after everything we’ve been through, and give him the what-for? The thought of being in the same room as the gentleman saps me!” Jake sits up and sits on the edge of their cold bed. “It’s just icing on the cake that after I work through all my bullshit with Dirk, suddenly we’re here. On a ship I gave to Kanaya and Roxy and Calliope to go handle this themselves. I don’t want to be here for the end. I can’t be here for the end.”
“Is that all?”
And that is, in fact, all. For now. I want to come back to this when I'm in a better headspace and give you the work you deserve, anon. We'll get 'em next time.
Thanks for your patience and for your support.
Coming back to this a week later! I'm in a slightly better headspace about this than I was, so let's unpack where this would have gone together.
It's pretty obvious that this was ever going to end one way: JaneJake breakup. Whether it's hard or cold or sad and soft, I think that Janejake ends with very loud, and then very quiet, sadness on the meatship/lifeboat/whatever you'd like to call it. Obviously, nobody here wants this, the author included, so I pulled the ejector seat and got out of there.
I think that both of our beloved alpha kids suffer a great deal of anguish re: the mission on the meat side. It's been pointed out to me that only person the Orange Strider doesn't really try to fuck over on the way out is Jane, that the pair have a kind of sympatico to them. As you can probably tell by the DNI at the top of my page, I don't believe in portalshipping romantically. That man is gay and I would not rob him of that gayness. But I do think they're a fascinating pair as friends. The last thing that Dirk does before he fucks off into the wild too-blue yonder is give Jane the world. Jane, unlike everyone else, doesn't have a possibly antagonistic or blackrom reason to go after Dirk, and yet... here she is. What does going on this trip mean for her? Why is she here, if she's gotten everything she's ever wanted because of Dirk?
I, being a Jake kinny (shocker), have thoughts on why Jake would be on the trip now, when he wasn't initially. As someone with their own Dirk Strider in their past, I think it goes without saying that when you pick up the pieces after the fact, you'd probably like to show off how well you're doing, how you've recovered. How you smile again. That you've learned to anticipate and withstand the blow. But it's fairly obvious to me that this is a blow that's shaken Jake to his core. Dirk quite literally can worm his way into Jake's mind and has proven he isn't above completely rewriting his character and his feelings to suit His Needs as author. Let's be honest with ourselves here: What Jake goes through at the hands of Dirk in The Epilogues is a terrifying situation to be in. And he's flying directly back into range of his ability to completely overwrite him. He is, in essence, flying back to a potential fate in which Dirk can get control over him again, a place where his abuser can win, like anybody who tries to regain contact with their abuser.
Cards on the table: in case it wasn't obvious, I was using janejake here to explore my own history of abuse and how it has impacted me. And it came out a little more raw and harshly shaped than I expected. For the time being, I'd like to try to explore some fluffier things before diving back into the psychologically awful. Maybe I'll actually watch Throne of Blood, too!
Thanks for reading as always, new and old readers. Let's get back to our regularly scheduled programming of janejake and janejake accessories.
Just the idea, Jakes dong resting between Janes big soft thighs. Jane knows Jake cannot resist now. Janes breasts pressed against Jakes chest, Jane and Jakes eyes staring into each other. "I'm all yours, Jake." her lips meeting his. everything in Jakes brain screaming for him to thrust. He can't hold back no more, he slips in. So warm, so wet "By JoOoOoOoOove!". Jake can't hold back any more, his hips begin to move more and more as Jane slips her tongue into Jakes mouth.
🎲☠️
Thank you for making post-canon fanfic that’s not DirkJake or GamJane. I love the way you write Jane, too. If you’re still taking fanfic requests, could you write something with Jane and Jake on the meat ship with Jake being unhinged? It can NSFW or SFW.
Anon, thank you! I have a lot of problems with DirkJake as a ship, from a personal Lived Experience perspective (been there, done that, came out of it with lasting trauma), and I personally just wanted to create something fun and self-indulgent and sweet with my first fic, as I didn't see anything like it on AO3 at the time. I'm really glad you've enjoyed my work thus far!
I've been sitting with your request since I received it and tried cracking at this every few days since. As mentioned in a previous update, I'm not exactly doin' so hot right now, and writing Jake and Jane in a very vulnerable position right now has been rough. I want you to have this in a timely manner, so please try to enjoy the heartache I've pulled from my chest and splattered onto the page. More thoughts at the end.
The Alpha Kids Aren’t Alright
Jake knew exactly how long he and everyone else had been on the Lifeboat.
Three years, six months, 13 days, 7 hours, 40 minutes. But who was counting? Certainly not Jake. Certainly not the man who had spent the past three years, six months, 13 days, 7 hours, and forty… one minutes waiting for the inevitable blow waiting for him at the end of the journey.
One has a lot of free time to watch movies in three years, six months, 13 days, 7 hours, and 41 minutes, and Jake had one hell of a backlog in the entirety of the surviving films of Planet Earth, and an infinitely long lifespan in which to watch them. Within the first year, Jake had finally gotten around to watching Akira Kurosawa’s body of work, a suggestion once given by Dirk without ever having actually seen any of these films himself. These days, Jake felt like Toshiro Mifune at the end of Throne of Blood, constantly bug-eyed, pelted with arrows, hiding around every corner. It’s not so much the fate at the end of the tunnel that haunts him as much as the fact that all he can do is wait. To hear that voice in his head again. For the other shoe to drop.
The ship had, unfortunately, had their Friday (as if the day of the week even mattered anymore) movie nights commandeered into Jake’s command. Everyone had stopped showing a while back. For the third week in a row, Jake came out of his and Jane’s room in his red boxer-briefs and sock-garters, sat down on the inflatable couch next to Jane, held her hand softly, and put on The Cat in the Hat. A dull smile crept across his face as they watched together.
“Janey, don’t you love Mike Myers? Isn’t he simply delightful?” he said, soft and hoarse.
“Uh.”
Jane didn’t quite know how to say she was more fond of the man in the Austin Powers films. Something about this film had made the scrawny, hairy man that reminded her so much of Jake when they were young look grotesque. The handheld dolly zooms onto a stiff face that filled the screen constantly, that wheeze of a laugh, the way everything was so clearly an artifice, from the whitened muzzle of his face to his visibly dirty, hairy feet with no pawpads, made him horrifying.
“Yeah, I uh… I think he’s great, dear.”
“This is my favorite movie of all time.” There was no joy in Jake’s voice. “I love how Kelly Preston clearly wants diddly squat to do with this movie. She had the right idea getting out fifteen minutes in. She was great in Battlefield Earth. I like when they make her blue. 'Cuz of the light.”
Another awful, wicked laugh emanates from the ship’s powerful speaker systems, and Jane recoils. Jake doesn’t even flinch as he peeps the horrors. “Jake… don’t you think we should maybe turn this down?” She squeezed his hand a little tighter than normal, putting a free hand on his bicep.
Jake put his clearly-exhausted face in his clearly-worn hands. “Sure.” His voice sounds so pathetic when it’s muffled. “Just turn it off.”
Jane breathes the biggest sigh of relief Jake has ever heard before he hears her scramble for the remote, before he changes his mind. They stood there, silent a moment. She wants to touch him, but she can't bring herself to reach out her hand. “Do you just want to lay down with me for a minute?”
“Yeah.”
The pair laid there for a moment, in the cold dark of their bedroom, on opposite sides of the bed. Jake was silent, still, practically dead. The only hint he showed any signs of life was the shallow sound of his breathing.
“Jake.” Jane’s voice was soft, burdened with worry.
“Darling.”
She tried to put a hand on his chest, but he caught her hand gently, placing it on her side of the bed. The motion stung. “I love you.”
“I know.” His voice somehow managed to sound even more hollow as he turned away from her.
Jane tries to search her mind for when things started to fall apart for them and comes up short. Three years. They’d been hurtling through space together for so long, knowing something difficult to swallow was waiting for them at the end of all this. She touched the side of his face, feeling the brush-bristle hairs of his beard, wild and light around the edges. “I miss you.” The words slide out before she can stop the thought from happening.
“I’m right here, Janey.”
And then it all comes tumbling out of her. “No you’re not, Jake. You haven’t been you in years. You’ve been a shambolic corpse since we were months into this trip.” She grabbed his shoulder and forced him to turn over, staring him down. “What the hell is wrong with you? You’ve been avoiding contact with everybody else on this ship and they’re worried about you. I can’t keep telling Roxy that it’s just a blue period. He’s terrified you’re going to do something rash… It’s been two years of this, Jake. Two years of you only shuffling out of bed for routine food and drink and movies, movies you don’t even enjoy anymore.” Her throat burned. “What’re you so goddamn scared of?”
Jake’s voice finally rose above a whisper, impatient, coarse. “Do you have any idea what it’s like to know that at the end of this little fancy flight, we're going to do something to Dirk? To know there’s a greater-than-zero-percent chance I will have to look that chap in his eyes, after everything we’ve been through, and give him the what-for? The thought of being in the same room as the gentleman saps me!” Jake sits up and sits on the edge of their cold bed. “It’s just icing on the cake that after I work through all my bullshit with Dirk, suddenly we’re here. On a ship I gave to Kanaya and Roxy and Calliope to go handle this themselves. I don’t want to be here for the end. I can’t be here for the end.”
“Is that all?”
And that is, in fact, all. For now. I want to come back to this when I'm in a better headspace and give you the work you deserve, anon. We'll get 'em next time.
Thanks for your patience and for your support.
My hot take is that the criticism that Jane is “boring” can genuinely also apply to John. The primary reason John isn’t called boring is because we spent more time with him. But Jane and John fill the same role, with a twist.
Both are supposed to be the normal, grounded characters who are meant to play off of a more colorful cast. John is a normal kid into magic who is thrust into a magical new world, while Jane is a normal teenager who lives in a world that isn’t quite right. She’s into detectives, and ironically her A6A1 character arc is about uncovering the mysteries of her world, and verifying the claims of her friends.
But Jane’s role as the primary alpha kid gets usurped in favor of Roxy, so people just assume she only exists to be a fanservice dispenser or a plot device.
I think one of the biggest shames of Homestuck as a comic is how little Jane gets the spotlight after the initial hit of her in A6A1 and A6A2.
Jane is a really uniquely fascinating character to me! I love that her combination of her skepticism and her sweetness is often the driving force in all of her relationships with other characters. I think she really wants to know the real person behind the friends that she talks to online, and I think often she's disappointed by the truth of what she finds in a way that's very rich and natural. That disappointment with others and the inability to compromise leads her into trouble so often as a character both in Homestuck and Beyond Canon. It's the thing that makes how she turns out make sense.
stormborns
snowghoul
andulkaphoto
germansingergirl
janainaart
yousharknotpass
turnnoffyourmind
