Dogs, Books and Catastrophes

I used to write books, but now I’m just really boring.

[memewhore]

[classycookiexo]

[capricorn-born]

Oddly specific. Got a deposit for 6,837 today

[weaselle]

fuck it, i never ever do those “reblog for X, this one really works!” posts, but this one doesn’t have any of that BS, this is just straight up wishing us good things; and then the comment doesn’t even say any of that either. Zero claims on this post, all positive vibes

May you end this week feeling ever more certain of a future you’ll love

[vmohlere]

May you end this week feeling ever more certain of a future you’ll love

[tlirsgender]

How fucked up would it be if Cardassian children just like, hatched out of eggs looking identical to adults just Smaller a la how a lot of irl reptiles are

[jaxsyl]

I thought someone misspelled Kardashian and honestly it makes sense both ways.

[dankmemeuniversity]

[jaxsyl]

Me and my husband constantly. Just walk through the room and flip each other off.

[niuniente]

CAT by  By 九米 / Zhaobangni (1631123)

[readableporn]

And when I say I lost my shit–and by all lost gods did I– I mean it.

[jaxsyl]

Bank statements, man. I know it’s supposed to be “Point Of Sale” but I always read POS as “Piece Of Shit.”

[memes-r-memes]

I’m definitely still mentally a child because I fully laughed so hard at this

[jaxsyl]

So I’m doing my annual re-listen of the HP series, and I get to the part in PoA where they’re facing the boggart in DADA, where Harry’s thinking for a minute it might turn into Lord Voldemort for him. So I start thinking, how could you make Voldemort look amusing so you could defeat the boggart? And then I pictured him with a red rubber clown nose where his real nose should he and honestly it’s two days later and I can’t stop giggling about it.

[jaxsyl]

M: How did you sleep? Me: Pretty good. Except for when those fireworks went off and I had to let the dogs in. Oh, and then Sirius kept kicking me because apparently he was having a dream about bounding across a field or something. Me: ...so, actually not that great, come to think of it.

[jaxsyl]

The new foaming ear cleaner the vet sold me for the dog works great, but it tastes absolutely terrible.

[jaxsyl]

Me: You having fun playing outside? Henry: Yeah. Me: I’m glad. I like being outside with you. Henry: I like diesel trains! Me: 😐

[jaxsyl]

This thing where suburbanites decorate with realistic Canada geese is troubling. I didn’t exactly grow up country, but rural enough that seeing one of those fuckers instantly activates my fight-or-flight response.

[jaxsyl]

So I must have had a dream or something where The Rock and I were all buddy-buddy, because now every time he gets mentioned I have to stop myself from being like, “Oh, Dwayne! I know him!” because I’m overcome with this sort of certain knowledge that we’re friends? And then I have to talk myself down like, no, honey, you don’t know The Rock. You might wish you did, but you really don’t.

[jaxsyl]

The tiniest little baby bunny just hopped across my lawn and I was honestly too full of squee to get a picture 🤦‍♀️

[jaxsyl]

Tfw you cut your hair and you really like it, but no one—NO ONE—notices, and so you wonder if a) it’s actually so bad no one wants to say anything, or b) people just...don’t really care.

[agrownupgeekgirl]

To be honest.. if more children were shown from birth that they are loved, cared for, and listened no matter their gender we might not have some of the problems we have now.  

[becausebirds]

When you’re trying to do homework but you can’t because birds

[spider-hands-mannos-deactivated]

Human: *attempts typing*

Birbs: >:V >:V >:V >:V >:V >:V >:V >:V >:V >:V >:V >:V >:V >:V >:V >:V >:V >:V >:V >:V >:V >:V >:V >:V >:V >:V >:V >:V >:V >:V

[nonbinarypeach]

these boyos sound like when you push an animal crossing villager into a hole