GHEMB
TVSTRANGERTHINGS
hello vonnie

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art blog(derogatory)
Alisa U Zemlji Chuda

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祝日 / Permanent Vacation
occasionally subtle
RMH
wallacepolsom

roma★
Not today Justin
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH

JBB: An Artblog!

izzy's playlists!

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Peter Solarz
sheepfilms
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@jeffreymanson
GHEMB
still trying to find a way to move on from what we were
#DAILYPHOTODIARYDAY14
at this point, you don’t owe me anything and I don’t blame you if you did what you did out of vengeance, i get it actually. but don’t say you didn’t wanted to, it sounds so fake i almost puked. i just feel so dumb and so let down. i also feel envy cos i don’t have that appeal and no one finds me that attractive. what’s the fucking point.
—————-
i found this text whilst on twitter and found it so amusing, i don’t feel like sharing the tweet itself (as some sort of gate keeping of mine :) ) i also felt a bit down after a consecutive good couple of days. so it was a bit aggressive but i am now fine.
#DAILYPHOTODIARYDAY13
on this very special day number, I will share something i wrote somewhere else:
Love as a Time Capsule
_________ years aren’t enough to describe experiences painful or cathartic enough to say, “I’ve been through so much…” And yet, for someone who is guided primarily by love, nineteen years might be just enough; maybe there are five or six years truly worth ‘studying.’ Everything else is just vague memories.
From music, cinema, painting, literature, and even theater…
There will always be different portrayals of love (in my humble opinion), and it will always follow you—or, in my case, chase you. Because it is the first thing we know and the last thing we forget when we die or come close to it.
Memory may forget, but the heart never does, no matter how foolish that may sound (once again, love speaking). No matter how much you move forward in life, in work… you will always remember something or someone who taught you so much and shaped who you are today—and perhaps, who you want to become tomorrow.
Because thanks to love—whether from a partner or a friendship—you begin to dream about the future. A trip with that friend, a house or a life with that partner… You grow up with the idea of becoming someone else without forgetting who you are now and who you might be a few years down the road.
What many of us fail to understand is that everything eventually turns to dust. Promises become empty, vows are broken, commitments dissolve. Those of us who don’t grasp this are left waiting, longing as we “move on,” still thinking about what once was and what will never be again.
It’s important to honor the past while respecting the present and considering the future. But for someone so guided by love, longing never dies. That splinter in the heart always remains—it never leaves.
You meet people out of routine or obligation, unaware that they will become a core memory. And with time, you learn to value those memories differently. As I sit here today, on January 30, 2025, at 1:20 AM, I realize that yesterday I was sleeping somewhere else, sharing moments with someone else, talking to people I still love and cherish. I miss them deeply, mourning to the moon, wishing I had been someone different.
I wish I had shown my best self to that person. I wish I could still feel the warmth of an embrace one more time. Or maybe just know how they’re doing—so my mind would stop speculating. Knowing that the choice was mine, or that I was the driving force behind so many people leaving my life… I still struggle to take responsibility for my mistakes because I want to close my heart to new experiences.
And honestly, I don’t know if I even want to have them. The memory of the past still lives in me, as if I were chasing ghosts down the street, hallucinating the presence of those I love just to feel them near. All of this confuses my mind, trapping me in the past instead of honoring my present, turning me into a guest of chaos. Emotional chaos.
So much harm I’ve caused without even meaning to. It seems I am simply designed to cause it, despite never wanting to.
Someday, my longing will die—because for everyone else, it already has. But on that day, I will die too.
#DAILYPHOTODIARYDAY12
I FEEL LIKE MY INNER CHILD IS ALIVE AND THEY ARE MAKING HIM FEEL SO GOOD AND SO CHERISHED—
ILL DO THE SAME, FOREVER INDEBTED.
#DAILYPHOTODIARYDAY11
A CATHARSIS WAS MET
#DAILYPHOTODIARYDAY10
regardless of what happens—
this is where my soul was naked.
#DAILYPHOTODIARYDAY9
A CATHARTIC EXPERIENCE AWAITS!
#DAILYPHOTODIARYDAY8
I KEEP WRITING ABOUT YOU 🤲🏼.
#DAILYPHOTODIARYDAY7
IM STARTING TO FORGET 💖
#DAILYPHOTODIARYDAY6
Everything seems calmer now.
#DAILYPHOTODIARYDAY5
Went out and took a drink— I now hate alcohol.
#DAILYPHOTODIARYDAY4
THIS IS ME EVERYTIME I FEEL UNDER THE WEATHER
#DAILYPHOTODIARYDAY3
lost my password so we'll start over
#DAILYPHOTODIARYDAY2
THE POST DID NOT UPLOAD UNTIL TODAY— THIS WAS YESTERDAY
#DAILYPHOTODIARYDAY1
it’s getting too fucking hard
it’s been 4 years since the first time someone really showed they cared to really know me
i can’t do this anymore
where are you?
please, where are you?