jess czapalski poetry

embracing my messiness she/her

[haleyincarnate]

I will go on believing that love is the future that I deserve.

Alice Walker

[sssolitario]

Lorde - Melodrama (2017)

[jessicaczapalski]

She’ll douse the fire I lit in you

Make you feel perfectly fine about losing me

Make you wonder why you ever fought so hard for me

Make you indifferent to knowing me

Somewhere out there is a girl so powerful

That you’ll never look at me the same way again

You’ll touch her and everything will make sense

In an instant I will no longer be the the most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen

You will lay eyes on her and forget all my hurricanes

She’ll be the balm for the burns I left on your skin

You will love her and let me go in the same moment

And finally what becomes of me won’t be your problem anymore

Jessica Czapalski, “I Think You Might’ve Found Her”

[jessicaczapalski]

If you start to love her

will I ever cross your mind again?

Jessica Czapalski

[jessicaczapalski]

I hope she loves you at least a little bit like I would’ve.

Jessica Czapalski

[jessicaczapalski]

AT ANY POINT

WHEN YOU LET HER HAVE YOU

IF ONLY FOR AN INSTANT

DID YOU THINK OF ME?

Jessica Czapalski

[jessicaczapalski]

Even if you don’t think that they understood love at all, you can find peace in knowing that you showed them what genuine love is- what it feels like & looks like- so that next time they find it, maybe they will be able to recognize it instead of throwing it away. Maybe that was your purpose in their life, and you fulfilled it. I know that you wanted to keep loving them, but maybe the love you gave them is still there, impacting the way the rest of their life unfolds.

Jessica Czapalski

[jessicaczapalski]

Do not ask me where I am going because I could not tell you. Away from the things that hurt me. Toward anything soft. Toward open arms. Away from the knives in my back. Over the speed bump without slowing down. Away from who I was. Away from where I was when I was her. Away from anyone who should recognize her. Coming back, unrecognizable. Away and back again, dead or alive. Even if it kills me, towards the burning sun.

Jessica Czapalski, Running Away

[jessicaczapalski]

I FELT THE SUNLIGHT WARM MY SKIN AND I HATED IT BECAUSE IT REMINDED ME OF STANDING NEXT TO YOU

Jessica Czapalski

[jessicaczapalski]

To love you was a thankless job. I’d do it over again.

Jessica Czapalski

[jessicaczapalski]

I hope we meet again as different people in another life. One where you haven’t hurt me first. And that time I’ll get to keep you

Jessica Czapalski

[jessicaczapalski]

I’ll spill my guts over & over to your shoulder blades until it’s in my best interest to never speak to you again.

Jessica Czapalski

[jessicaczapalski]

I’LL SPILL MY GUTS AND YOU’LL SPILL YOUR DRINK AND MY SECRETS TO THE NEXT GROUP OF PHANTOMS WHO WILL LISTEN

Jessica Czapalski

[jessicaczapalski]

I didn’t know that your regret never meant repentance. I didn’t know that wanting me never meant staying. I didn’t know that leaving would always be this easy for you. But if it is, why do you insist on making this harder?

Jessica Czapalski

[jessicaczapalski]

I’ll try not to let the bitter end get the best of all our years.

Jessica Czapalski

[feliz-navidad]

"What if my friends secretly hate me?" What if they pray for you before bed? What if they hear a song come on and it makes them immediately think of you? What if when times are hard for them, they close their eyes and think of the memories they've shared with you? What if they study your face closely to see how you're feeling? What if they listen to your stories? What if they smile when you text them first? What if

[jessicaczapalski]