Jessica. 21 Blonde through and through Square State to the Left. Community College! Fandoms and junk. Text posts. You know the drill. Have any questions, wanna talk or anything, the ask box is open. :)
Bright the sun shone | at the time of Þor’s birth,
And bathed his count'nance fair.
Loki, wolf-father, | the trickster, the liar,
I found on the cold pavement
While returning in glory | from a grand hunt
For a 3 AM quesadilla.
which is why i made things like the soft taco just as detailed as the emblems of thor (goat, hammer, rune) and loki (Baldersbrow holding back the fenriswolf, Jörmungandr, rune)
WHY DOES EVERYONE ASSUME THOR DOESN’T KNOW WHAT HE’S DOING??! He literally smiles every time someone falls for his “I’m just a dumb jock” routine. Guys, he grew up with Loki, he went to university, he’s been alive for over a millennia. His flaw in the first Thor movie was that he had too much hubris, not that he was stupid.
He knows that he can play dumb and get out of any situation. Do you all not see that sheepish smirk he always does?
Thor: Ragnarok only confirms what the first two movies were hinting at - Thor is very intelligent and can even pull one over on Loki when he wants to. After the events in The Avengers, he knows Loki’s true feelings about him and that’s why he’s so emotional in The Dark World and why he’s always teasing him in Ragnarok.
@unstatedmartini: #i’m 200% sure that they had another game called Terribly Sorry#hey. let’s do Terribly Sorry.#no. it’s humiliating.#not for me it’s not.#*cue thor being fake-stupid and fake-clumsy and fake-drunk and real loud*#*loki following along waving his hands nervously* terribly sorry! oh dear! my brother can be such a brute! terribly sorry!#and they’re long gone before anyone realizes that the Important Magic Thingy or Super Secret Map is gone
I haven’t posted in a long while. I’ve been caught up in the game I play every day: Jessica’s life.
I have lots of thoughts. Some are coherent, some, not so much. Some make sense and in order, most are not.
Be careful. It’s a wild ride.
Life
I find life to be valuable, yet common. Fleeting and out of reach, yet solid and sturdy. Almost like the mountains. You know it’s there. It will always be there.
I think that it’s almost impossible to determine what happens after death. Scientifically and medically speaking we know. But if religion isn’t an aspect: what happens to a soul once death has overcome the embodiment of a person?
The breath fades. The heart slows. and eventually the brain turns off. After years of functioning it has finally finished it’s last biological compute.
yet the soul. does it linger awhile longer? does it watch in distress as loved ones mourn? is it distant or close? Does the soul long to be held and to hold onto their one true love?
I do not know.
For awhile I have been considering and weighing in the purpose and meaning of life. The trials, the competitions, the risks all while being graced and blessed with the success, the triumphs, and satisfaction.
What does it mean to be successful? Is it money. or family. or fun. and happiness.
maybe it’s all of it.
or maybe it’s none.
I wonder at times if the life we lead is truly our destiny. Am I meant for something greater than being who I am. Or I am to find true purpose in carving a historical memory the people who will come after me wonder why I thought and worked and sacrificed so much for a moment of glory.
in the end.
is it worth it?
is it worth the heartache. worth the pain? Is our destiny suppose to make us feel fulfilled. or merely a shadow becoming substance through the actions and the words we speak.
Sometimes when I catch myself before I close my eyes and let the sleep invade my senses I wonder what it would be like to know that I am more than who I think I am.
I would like to see myself as others view me. Am I the same person. Or completely unrecognizable.
My deepest fear is to not feel the flutter of a heartbeat in my womb.
My greatest desire is to be mom. not a super cool mom. or a hey i am in bed today mom. but the mom who makes her mom proud. A mom that makes the father of her children beam with light as he knows that in this crazy world we did something right. I want to be the mom where I kiss the wounds, and put fear into their hearts when they disobey. I want to hold them close and whisper melodies into their ears as they drift across the passing of a peaceful sleep.
I do not know whether my ideal desire is simply one of fantasy.
I think I miscarried. or had a chemical pregnancy. it was early, but the pain felt like I was dying.
I wasn’t. but a part of me was.
maybe.
I find myself wondering if i bury myself in work because it is the only escape I have.
to know that if I do an excellent job and do what I need to, everything will be okay.
and then I come home and deal with things that I’ve been putting off.
like packing. or washing clothes.
or taking my vitamins.
I am concerned my hair is falling out.
or that I gained too much weight.
Should I pay the bills? or spend it on something that will make me temporary happy. not happy at all. I don’t want to be like this.
I struggle to see what means to live a life that is not muted in gray undertones. metaphorically speaking.
Depression. If i am, then I need help. Help to deal with the struggles I face. If I am not. then I must find a way. A way to climb out of this deep cavern I’ve engulfed myself in. the cavern of self pity.
I did not mean to fail.
I did not mean to .
I did not mean
I did not
I did.
I.
I love it when you hold my hand. and kiss my forehead and my the tip of my nose. I love it when you smell my hair and hold me close to your heart. I love it when you poke and tease me. and call me silly names.
I love you.
I love you so much, that sometimes I long to be more to you than where we are at. Maybe you are waiting. abiding your time for the perfect moment. the moment where we declare that our lives together are so much better when we are close than a part.
I want you to call me your fiance. your wife. I am your girl. but I want more. what more love, and compassion does one offer before we meet that stage of our relationship. at what point do we plunge in feet first in the waters of life.
I know you love me when you look at me with soft blue eyes. or when you ask me if the pills I swallow are good for me. When you tell me to drive safe. or remind me of my daily goals. you support me physically, emotionally, certainly, financially.
I am forever in your debt.
I will never be able to repay you for everything you have done for me.
I fucking hate FAFSA and took a lot longer to finish my prereqs because of them. My last quarter was ONE CREDIT under full time…still three classes but the last three classes I needed for my program weren’t all the normal five credits.
That drop in credits dropped my financial aid from 1,400…to 400…. that didn’t even cover the classes, let alone supplies and books one of which was 250. I couldn’t take those three classes, I had to take them ONE BY FUCKING ONE and missed out on applying for my program last year.
I called to ask why dropping one credit dropped my aid by over two thirds and was told they gauged my classes by my status as full-time or part-time, and suggested filing for a SECOND program I didn’t intend on applying for and taking a FOURTH class to get my full-time schedule back…all of that on top of my FULL-TIME job because they didn’t think that credits made more sense to judge a student’s workload than their status.
Because of FAFSA I had to wait an extra year before I could apply for my program.
“not living with parents and not having them claim you on their taxes doesnt make you an independent student” then what the fuck does, fafsa because that sounds pretty independent to me
titsay
turnnoffyourmind
snowghoul
kianamaiart
romaincrisis
baratheonpilled
gracieabrams
