Where's my cheese plate? @jesssbedazzle - Tumblr Blog

They always come back

Guy texted me out of the blue “👋🏼”

So then I demanded to know the reason he ghosted me for two months.

He gave me his reason and it seemed legit but also I didn’t let it slide. He apologized and then when I asked where we stood now he just backtracked and kind of put it on me.

So I told him I had already broken up with him in my mind and we could stay broken up if that’s what he wanted.

We said our goodbyes….. and then he promptly blocked me.

#seriously what is with men?#i didnt block him when he ghosted me but then he makes me decide and then blocks me?#seems a little butthurt #dont worry he’ll reach out right before he gets married

I did the 72 hr rule.

And now I’m listening to Olivia Rodrigo screaming the lyrics

#i am a middle aged woman #i am also a 16 year old girl pining after her love #the fuck is wrong with dudes these days #just fucking own up

I’ve realized the after being intimate and you’re just talking with the person and the non-sexual touching that happens is the truest part of intimacy.

#putting my hand on his chest and his hand on top of mine with like one finger entwined #his other hand cups my butt but its not sexual #it took us a long time to get there #being used so many times in the past makes it hard to trust someone

All these New Yorkers are moving down to Florida. Like a lot. It’s getting ridiculous but kind of understandable - you want to be in a tropical area and feel like you’re on vacation

But....

Y’ALL AREN’T READY FOR THE HORRIBLE HOT, STICKY SUMMERS AND HURRICANES OH AND SURPRISE NOW YOU GET TO EXPERIENCE TOURIST SEASON AS A HOMEOWNER

#igivethemallayeartops #everyonelovestomoveduringdryseason #andthenBOOM #itshurricaneseasonandWAIT #hihumidityandstormseveryday

Ok I gotta see if other people remember 2010/2011.

So QAnon is big now - hello insurrection and really weird conspiracy theories.

But does anyone else remember when Q started posting? Or someone like that? Saying Hollywood actresses were being pimped out???

And people were speculating it was Robert Downey jr?

Please tell me you remember this.

Do you think some people are just more mentally strong?

My best friend and I have been in several car accidents and near misses - all separately.

I’ve had two cars tilt on their sides, I’ve been t-boned, etc.

She has too.

But she’s terrified to drive in any type of bad weather. And I’m ok - I’m a great driver in bad weather - I feel because of the accidents.

I don’t know if that’s a good example. I was watching the Kim K Letterman episode where she explains it was the best that she got robbed out of her family because she can handle it mentally. It got me thinking about how we handle trauma and stress.

I don’t date.

I don’t like to date because I’ve done it and it’s stressful and boring.

But sometimes I try.

And then the men lie.

Always lie.

For the limited amount of time I date, they always lie about something.

And then contact me either when they’re about to get married or when they’re expecting a child.

So.... tell me again why I should give men a chance or 2nd chance because there’s been no reason to do it ever again!!!

I’ve had bad foot problems for almost four months now. Multiple x-rays and an MRI say there’s nothing wrong - which is even more frustrating.

I’ve been wearing a boot for two weeks now and it doesn’t seem to be working.

Fast forward to today - Butters got into an ant hill and so he proceeded to drag me a football field to my parents place. On my bum foot. Because I wasn’t wearing my boot.

Guess whose foot is in major pain

teaboot

I love the weirdly specific rules that go with answering a riddle. Like, “I Have Two Eyes But I Cannot See: What Am I?” And the answer’s supposed to be the word ‘iridescent’ because ‘two *i*’s’ right, but like. Why can’t the answer be like… A guy with really bad cataracts. Someone wearing a blindfold. My uncle’s dog. Like why does it gotta be deep

teaboot

“I have a face but no eyes lips or nose, what am I?” Slenderman. Next

teaboot

It walks on four legs in the morning, two legs at noon and three legs in the evening. What is it? A dog with a muscular disease.

What has a head, a tail, is brown, and has no legs? Snake.

What disappears when you say it’s name? my brother when it’s his turn to get the trash

skyykkeli

I think you have missed the meaning of the riddles

teaboot

Listen. Listen if I’m trapped between a wall of sentient fire and a goblin mage who will only reveal the one true path across the forbidden glade if I answer his riddles three, I’m not going to waste time struggling for the answer with the deepest life lesson. I’m gonna pick an answer that fits the criteria and I’m gonna stick with it. “A poor man has it and a rich man needs it” it’s a flashlight. They’re in a cave. The poor man is a tour guide. Next Question before my ass burns off, Por Favour

deaf-fellas-partner

This is the real way how ravenclaws get into their rooms

gilalevana

The secret to the ravenclaw riddles is that you don’t actually need to know “the answer”, you just need to be able to defend the answer you give.

legisaskerator

that’s the definition of being an English major

kyraneko

The result of the Ravenclaw common room door is a House full of students who can make up bullshit on the spot and defend it to the death using only three braincells and a complete absence of fucks, and the resulting agony this produces in the teachers is PRECISELY what Rowena Ravenclaw wanted.

magicallygrimmwiccan

This is the true essence of Ravenclaw

jesssbedazzle

As a Ravenclaw, I approve this message

So I post on my side insta about how I’m getting out of debt. This “guy” follows me and messages me right away. I’m polite and say hi. He says he’s from Chicago and an architect but online he helps people in need and it looked like I could use some help.

Red flags all over the place. So I decline. He messages again that he wants to help me. I say thank you again but that I have a job and can live comfortably while managing my debt.

I then tell him he can use whatever money he was going to give to me to someone who actually needs it in this trying time. He never answered.

I wonder if he wanted feet pics. I have horrible looking feet

Don’t try to make me have pity on you because you wanted hand sanitizer and we’re completely sold out and your husband is a TRANSPLANT PATIENT!!! WHO IS OUT WITH YOU ON YOUR SHOPPING EXCURSION!!!!

If you’re that worried about your husband getting sick, you should have stocked up on those before flu season!!!!! And also kept him at HOME!!!

I also checked out an older man who bought gloves. GLOVES!!! Gloves do nothing if you touch your face!! I’m at a loss.

As an aside to that, I live in Florida and you should have all the necessities prepped for hurricane season. So I’m good besides water — but I have a filter so I don’t know why people are buying water like they’re going to shut it off?

Reason whatever it sucks to be without a partner/lover/hookup

I am a great kisser and give a killer BJ

Tease people about White Claws

I’m allergic to beer and have been trying to find for YEARS an alternative that isn’t wine or spirits - or something 19 year olds drink at bonfire parties and get gut rot.

Hard seltzer is awesome and it tastes good.

(and my heart doesn’t start racing and i don’t start vomiting uncontrollably and my tongue doesn’t swell and my throat doesn’t close)

#if you’re curious it’s most likely the rice proteins #I had a protein frap sample at Starbucks and I had an allergic reaction similar to when I drink beer #it had rice protein #so of course I have the weird allergies #juniper(so gin) and beer

Love when I meet people from Miami

It’s so huge so when people actually know the neighborhoods, it’s nice to commiserate about the traffic.

#she asked if I lived in north or south Kendall #bless #it’s a thirty minute difference in a span of 5 miles

commandtower-solring-go-deactiv

The problem with the idea of 8 hours of work, 8 hours of sleep and 8 hours of recreation as a structure for a day is that it simply can’t work that way. If I’m expected to be at work at 9, then my work day must begin at 7. Allowing myself a rushed experience to wake up and get to work. And I live close to work. So either my recreation or my sleep needs to take a hit, but for some people it could be more. 8 hours a day, 5 days a week as a basis for full time work is honestly unreasonable at that point. Because it isn’t actually 40 hours a week, it’s 50 hours a week lost to a job, of which 10 is unpaid.

blogging-phelddagrif

some of my coworkers have 2h of transit to get to work, which takes 4-5h off their free time. working full time is a bad idea and shouldve never been a thing

xenoqueer

This is, it’s worth noting, by design.

It’s perfectly well known that people can only really “work” (in that they can only consistently and effectively perform tasks and create products) 3-6 hours a day, for 1 hour to 2 hours at a time. Generally speaking, the broad consensus among actual researchers is to aim for about 4 hours a day.

The rest of these work hours, and the associated sunken time necessary to get to and from these work hours, serves one purpose:

It exhausts people.

People who don’t have leisure time are stressed. People who are stressed need conveniences. People who need conveniences will pay for them.

People who are stressed also don’t have the energy to fight for their rights, having expended all that energy in just staying alive.

And let’s not forget that maintaining a clean home and providing food for yourself takes over 20 hours a week (appx 20 hours in-house, and varying hours spent running outside errands) if you are completely abled.

texnessa

HAHAHAHA. Tell that to a chef who literally does not stop moving from the moment they walk into the kitchen until they change, light one up and finally sit down after 12+ hours.

Trending Blogs

Recently Viewed Blogs

Where's my cheese plate?