Texnessa

I'M A FUCKING CHEF. HALF TEXAN- HALF ENGLISH. HISTORY. BOOKS. TRAVEL. FUTBOL. WINE. TATTOOS. ENGLAND BY WAY OF TEXAS CALIFORNIA FRANCE ENGLAND SINGAPORE NEW YORK FUCKING CITY AN IVY LEAGUE WHOREHOUSE AND A FRENCH CULINARY SCHOOL.

[follow-the-journey]

[nessa007]

Quinta Brunson and Hannah Einbinder's reaction to Keke Palmer bringing up the infamous 2 Girls, 1 Cup video during the Comedy Actress Roundtable for The Hollywood Reporter (May 2026)

[texnessa]

@nessa007. Friend, I feel like we need to know each other based on this one messy as fuck post alone.

[just-another-cat-blog]

pride month!!!

[lemonsharks]

Is that a miette?

[jeanjauthor]

Pride for you!  Pride for a thousand years!!

[lost-and-cursed]

you COME OUT to miette? you come out to her as queer? oh! oh! pride for mother! pride for mother for One Thousand Years!!!!

[texnessa]

I mean, if there's a perfect t-shirt for me, it exists.

[texnessa]

My Evil A purchases are kinda weird until you know I am a displaced Texan who cooks for a living and lives with an 88 year old Biscoff addict.

[texnessa]

Hey Mom. Totally not Mexican at all.

[realitytvgifs]

[texnessa]

In case anyone is wondering, I went to college with this lunatic. She was not right in the head then either.

[texnessa]

England Englanding 110%.

[texnessa]

Do I need em? No.

Do I wanna em? Yep.

[texnessa]

This photo has not been altered in any way. From my iPhone to the hellsite.

I have spent maybe two and a half days in the sun so far this spring. I live in England, so basically the Arctic Circle. My seventh generation South Texas mother insisted until her last breath that we are not in any way Mexican.

Sure.........

PS. No elder abuse occurred in the process of making this photo. She wouldn't let me help because "You are great at killing and cooking. Not so great with the living." Truth hits hard sometimes.

[ravenclairee]

How Interview with the Vampire changes its tune with The Vampire Lestat

[texnessa]

Not gonna lie................

[isay]

Who knew Billy Joel has a half brother in Vienna? I probably would if I’d watched the second half of the doco about him.

Billy Joel appears on a prerecorded video. He’s looking more and more like he should be sat in an Italian restaurant in an episode of The Sopranos. Anyway his song Vienna waits for you is played, and then it’s time for Conchita Wurst, the bearded drag queen who won with her Bond theme in 2014, except it’s just the music, no Conchita. Still it seems like she’s been on every year since winning so fair enough.

Time for the jury votes…this’ll take a while because all the countries, even those who failed to make it out of the semis, get to vote. All 35 of them.

My coffee has now been brewing for over three hours, I’m tempted to have another cup but I think it may bend time and space.

Ten countries in and Our Delta is in the leading pack, but the Euro alliances are beginning to show.

Michael is now wearing a satin dinner jacket but no shirt. Victoria in tonight’s colour, silver.

Bulgaria leading…surprisingly Sweden have un point. The world is upside down.

[texnessa]

I started reading this and thought I had had a fucking seizure.

[rylandgraces]

Lionel Boyce as CARL Project Hail Mary (2026) dir. Phil Lord, Chris Miller

[texnessa]

THE HOT ASS PASTRY MAN FROM THE BEAR.

[texnessa]

Dear England,

I bought this because my inclination towards 'FUCK YOU. Yeah, I'll find out the fucking hard way' is way stronger than my need to protect a gastrointestinal system which has been roto-routered into a hamster trail of weird connections that approximate how a normal human digests shit.

This ain't gonna end well.

Signed,

A Displaced Texan

[texnessa]

Jeff’s Candy Shop (@jeffscandyshop) • Instagram photos and videos

78K Followers, 504 Following, 515 Posts - See Instagram photos and videos from Jeff’s Candy Shop (@jeffscandyshop)

I have missed my calling in life.

[ilostmygh0st]

[isay]

In better news today it's David Attenborough's 100th birthday.

[texnessa]

Every day I wake up and see something with Sir David mentioned and he's still among us, makes that an excellent day.

Attenborough at 100 on BBC

[texnessa]

Daughter of my vicar [who sadly and suddenly passed last year from pancreatic cancer] has a birthday tomorrow. This fucking thing weighs more than a toddler.

I eagerly await the 'after photos' of a grown ass woman covered head to toe in Callebaut extra dark with a chonky [by accident] double cream ganache with orange blossom extract.