jimmy purkey @jimmypurkey - Tumblr Blog

Let me preface this by saying I’m not glamorizing anything but self love. So it’s been a year since one of the worst feelings I have ever felt. 2018 was a tough year and I had so much riding on it not being that way. I lost my grandmother, and then in turn I let down a lot of friends and then myself and my family. This time last October I started planning my suicide. Ironically I also started planning a show with two fantastic artists that I let down. I couldn’t bring myself to paint much less showcase adjacent to others. My show in January will be a slight homage to those I let down. Back to the crux of the story. I was planning on ending everything in November 2018. I picked the building I would jump from, and through work I had access to the roof anytime I needed it. I was in the midst of picking the day when I realized that this wasn’t right. I promised I would never think those thoughts. I always held those who did succumb to those urges cowards. It can happen to anyone. Those closest to me didn’t even know until I finally asked for help and decided to see a psychiatrist about my thoughts. I was days away and I got help because I asked. 2019 has been a hell of a year and I am supremely grateful for the opportunities I had been given. I showed a lot of work, sold pieces to people who cherish them, and set up a new show for 2020. All because I said something. Love yourself even if you feel you can’t anymore. You are powerful and can overcome any obstacles. 2019 Purkey is here because he got help. Bring on 2020. . . . . . . . . . . #positivevibes #selfcare #endthestigmaofmentalhealth #anxiety #mentalhealthsupport #mentalhealthadvocate #mentalhealthisimportant #depressionsupport #mentalhealthmatters #mentalhealthrecovery #selfcarethreads #suicideprevention #selflove #endthestigma #anxietyrelief #quotes #mentalhealth #mentalhealthblogger #mentalillness #mentalhealthawareness #endthestigmaofmentalillness #threads #selfcaretips #depression #inspiration #loveyourselffirst (at Owings Mills, Maryland) https://www.instagram.com/p/B4LJ7PFnplk/?igshid=13a4sbd6mg2aa

This beauty is now hanging @ironicyork!!! So go see it, buy it, shoot a selfie with it, whatever makes you happy:) . . . . . #artworks #drawing #politics #instaart #artist #spraypaint #drawings #paint #twitter #artwork #artofinstagram #sprayart #urbanart #arte #stencils #artsy #illustration #painting🎨 #sketch #painting #stencil #paintingoftheday #art #graffiti #graffitiart #digitalpainting #photography #artoftheday #memes #streetartglobe (at Timonium, Maryland) https://www.instagram.com/p/B34y1JyH3zf/?igshid=1xa0jrzfx5wwl

Working on this Behemoth tonight. This one is encompassing alot of what I'm trying to express constantly. There's order, chaos and the desire for expansion. Let's see where it goes. (at New Salem, York, Pennsylvania) https://www.instagram.com/p/B3yW9k4nyPL/?igshid=up9v4fg54umu

So there's this live from the Idles song "Television" that goes : "If someone talked to you, the way you do to you, I'd put their teeth through. Love Yourself!" It keeps resonating so hard. I talk myself down from everything. It's like I'm scared to succeed because if it falls apart so do I. This week I had some days off to reflect on myself, my relationship to the Divine, and my relationship with my art. Even with the meds I'm still a bit lost in my head and when I feel that I'm not meeting my expectations I beat myself up about it. One day I'll love myself as much as I should. https://www.instagram.com/p/B3fkAc2H92K/?igshid=8e7v5ft7tmvg

I took off a few days to get some creative time and it feels like time is eluding me in some weird blocking maneuver. I have been going over all the pieces getting them ready for January, so many pieces to go over. I’m really grateful and excited for this opportunity even if it petrifies me a bit. (at New Salem, Pennsylvania) https://www.instagram.com/p/B3XUeMMHXmm/?igshid=1nk6cu9ckm4ov

What is your metric for accomplishment? I’ve been trying to produce new material but its been a little foggy. Glad I have so many wips to keep me going. Feeling unaccomplished... (at New Salem, Pennsylvania) https://www.instagram.com/p/B3VznudHd5n/?igshid=ue8bj9heqm7s

Let’s see how they look together on the wall! (at New Salem, Pennsylvania) https://www.instagram.com/p/B3Si9g6nCJZ/?igshid=k7tx4wvpol2p

Working on this tonight. Tired and full bellied this Rosh Hashanah after @krafty_nurse and I cooked family recipes. This was in honor of our ancestors and to show those family traditions that they are still remembered. When Gram passed, something broke. I feel that through the pieces I’ve worked on the last year and a half I’ve been able to channel it and express it a bit. Don’t worry, I’m not mopey, just reflecting and painting. I like this direction. Happy New Year:)♥️ (at New Salem, Pennsylvania) https://www.instagram.com/p/B3BCpndHMiq/?igshid=anhxmdlhyul8

Let it ride. Letting this one tell me where to go. 4'x4'. Work in progress. (at New Salem, Pennsylvania) https://www.instagram.com/p/B22yEafnXUM/?igshid=1lwbcufbkyg20

Sunday Funday. Just got finished washing our cars, started laundry, and are planning this week's meals. The past week my wife and I have reinvigorated our relationship with better communication and new stress lowering techniques. She's my everything and I am thankful. Newly framed piece. Work in progress, much like life. (at New Salem, Pennsylvania) https://www.instagram.com/p/B2uiI5qnYNe/?igshid=ia9ddl53r80i

Loudness doesn't instantly make you right! Please don't ever forget that. "And if we only listened to each other's voices instead of waiting for our own chance to speak. We'd see more within ourselves. We'd have better relations. We'd have a better understanding of our quality in life instead of moping in pain " -- Fade Away; Mismo. I wrote lyrics and sang in a Noisey Rock band in the early 2000. We're on Spotify, Google Play yadda yadda. In case you ever wanted to hear me sing/shout/scream :) This is what I'm working on tonight. (at New Salem, Pennsylvania) https://www.instagram.com/p/B2h1m51Hy8R/?igshid=1vzcob3qxg0tj

What are you afraid of? I'm afraid of dying. Ironic how last year ended. My father and I were talking on our fears of it last night. What scares you the most? (at New Salem, Pennsylvania) https://www.instagram.com/p/B2cRTH_n0RM/?igshid=lxrjkytiuczw

Fully mounted. Ready for wire this week, then lights. So stoked! (at New Salem, Pennsylvania) https://www.instagram.com/p/B2atPe3HN8j/?igshid=1doe8d3bzz06s

I'm a little on the up side tonight. Trying to calm down some to go to bed. Gonna sleep on it and reconvene tomorrow. I'm also building some frames in the afternoon so better crash now. (at New Salem, Pennsylvania) https://www.instagram.com/p/B2YbMl4H1i1/?igshid=13gyqqlscbsvm

Three hots and a cot. I got big plans in action for this piece. (at New Salem, Pennsylvania) https://www.instagram.com/p/B2IE0DmnY9L/?igshid=18t8400vbdnba

This used to be an old drafting table. I'm gonna put some color onto it and see what happens. (at New Salem, Pennsylvania) https://www.instagram.com/p/B2HbogunWMe/?igshid=1d90hxzhcmbz7

Larger scale, work in progress. (at New Salem, PA) https://www.instagram.com/p/B2DUzuYnk-l/?igshid=y07d6jzih5rk

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