secnjae:
The girl felt exhausted. It felt like a weight had been added, on top of everything else she already worried about. Should she be worried that Dongju brought up the whole animal control topic? Would he call them? Did she have to hide Bomi now? A million questions swirled around in her mind and she didn’t have the answer to any of them. It only made her grow even more anxious to the point where she could feel her pulse pick up.
What was she supposed to do now? Should she call him and ask him? Seonjae needed to clear her head, she knew she would probably spend the rest of the night obsessing over the topic at hand if she didn’t give it a rest now. She needed something to distract her, and she needed to do it quickly. But she also needed the reassurance that Bomi was still there, with her, that no one had taken her. So as she hung upside down form her bed, trying to get the red panda’s attention, the girl immediately felt somewhat relieved. Bomi was still there. And she seemed okay.
Talking to Dongju only made her remember the day Seonjae had brought her in, the state she found her in. The human would’ve never thought that she would grow so attached to the red panda. She had actually planned to contact animal control once Bomi got better, but after spending so much time with her, she couldn’t find the strength or willpower to do it. She grew too attached to the small panda. And honestly, she wouldn’t have it any other way. Seonjae wasn’t sure what she would do if the panda disappeared.
Bomi had somehow turned into her confidant, if anything felt too awful she would immediately think of Bomi and how relieved she would feel once she got to her. It was easier to interact with her than with her friends, even though the panda couldn’t actually answer her, she seemed to always convey her feelings in some type of way, wether it was a gesture or a sound that escaped her tiny form. Their relationship didn’t seem to bring any type of misunderstandings, they always found their way back even if Seonjae scolded her. It wasn’t as easy to do the same with her friends.
Seonjae stared back, probably flushed by that point, all the blood rushing to her brain. But she waited patiently, not wanting to startle the red panda. The girl knew what it was like to be reprimanded by a person and then have that same person act like it was okay minutes later. Not only was it confusing, but it made her act cautious around them. Seonjae would understand if Bomi didn’t want to come out, sure it would break her heart and make her feel awful, but she would have to accept it. She never quite understood what her parents went through whenever she distanced herself from them, but she had a feeling that, to some extent, it was the same as what Bomi was doing right now. It did hurt her feelings that she didn’t come out right away, but she understood why she hadn’t.
Picking her up carefully, Seonjea repositioned them on the bed, letting Bomi rest on top of her and softly stroking her back. She didn’t take her eyes off of her, almost like she was afraid that the small animal would disappear if she blinked just for a moment. “Are you okay?” she questioned faintly, making sure to show the panda that she wasn’t mad anymore. She knew it was pointless to even ask her, but it brought her comfort to just speak to her. “I love you, okay? You need to know that I love you and would never ever ever give you away.” she continued, just as quietly as she did before. “Even if it gets me in trouble.” she concluded pressing a gentle peck right above her eyes.
No matter how often the human reminded her, Jinri was still scared that the day when she had to leave her side will come. The red panda had yet to reveal herself and even that alone was haunting her. She didn’t want to scare away Seonjae but there was a chance that she will. Many others had, and she desperately wanted to believe that Seonjae would be different. Unfortunately, there were many times she thought the same about someone else only to be hurt and devastated when they turned their backs on her.
Then there was the looming risk of her father finding out where she was all this time. She knew he wasn’t happy that she was gone most of the time now, but didn’t say anything because at the very least, she was showing up to important meetings. That was what she was for after all; to make appearances and hope that investors would see interest in their company. She was nothing but a pawn to him, and had grown up used to it. But she didn’t want him coming after Seonjae if he learnt that this was where she was staying. The girl was an angel for taking in the animal, and she honestly thought she would give her away once she had healed but instead, she kept Jinri and for once, she felt the love and care that she always craved for but never received. To leave Seonjae would break her heart but if it came to that, she would just to keep the other safe.
Resting on top of the human, Jinri nuzzled as closely as she could with the other. Being here as an animal, she had become a lot more affection than she ever was in all of her 22 years. But mostly it was because it was only with Seonjae she did so. Staring straight into her brown hues, Jinri wanted to believe her words. That she was safe here, that she wasn’t going to be leaving this place but that was just too good to be true. Her life had taught her not to be optimistic. Her life taught her that her father will always get to her if he really needed to.
She wiggled around until she could somewhat hug her with her relatively short arms. Sometimes she wished she was in her human form so that she could talk with the other. Or hang out with her like normal people. Instead, she was kept hidden inside her home. Nuzzling close enough, Jinri poked her nose against Seonjae’s cheek.
