A while back, I called for a Lyft ride home from the airport. The lyft pulled up, he called my name, and I opened the door and climbed in. While I was climbing in he was getting out, which I didnât realize until he opened the back door on the other side.
Him: Iâll put your bag in the trunk.
Me: Oh, thereâs no need.Â
Him: Iâll just put it back there.Â
Me: I prefer to keep my bag with me.
I was also still holding onto it so he couldnât just grab it, and when I said âI prefer to keep it with meâ this cloud of rage crossed his face.
Him: Then get out.Â
Me: Excuse me?
Him: Get out, I donât want your bag fucking up my upholstery.
Now, this was a weekender â essentially an upscale duffle bag. Small, almost brand new, easily fitting on the middle-seat beside me. I donât know if he was just really intense about his upholstery or if he was running some kind of scam, but either way I now DEFINITELY was not going to let him separate me from my bag.
So I said âOkay,â and I picked up my bag and got out, took out my phone, and cancelled him as my driver.
He looked at me like Iâd grown a second head. There was this moment of total disconnect in his face, and then he started ranting about how someone had damaged his upholstery and they needed to put their bags in the back and he wasnât going to have me getting his upholstery dirty.Â
I said, âIâm out of your car. Drive on, Iâll get another,â and held up my phone.
This had clearly never happened before â it looked like plenty of people had thought âThis guy is crazyâ but went the âso Iâd better let him do what he wantsâ route instead of âso Iâm getting out of his carâ. Which is totally normal! Weâre socialized to prioritize ânot making a sceneâ over personal safety. But when you do call that bluff, when you defy the social convention that the other person is counting on to make you do what they want you to do, they donât know how to react, which gives you time for a clean getaway. And maybe he thought I was a dickhead but what do I care what an asshole thinks of me?Â
Anyway the moral of the story is yes, you should know that you can almost always leave a situation and often itâs in your best interest to do so.Â
(Right after I called for another car he picked up a fare using Quick Match or whatever itâs called, peeled out of the Lyft lane, and hit another car well nigh immediately.)