Thoughts for the Void #01
Finding Meaning in the Era of Weird
It is no grand statement to say that these past few years have been weird. It is hard to define what exactly the weirdness is and when it all began (although Adam Curtis’ HyperNormalisation has some clues) but without a doubt, it’s been fucking weird.
And this era of weirdness has fully infected my way of being. In the past 5 years, I’ve entirely lost my creative soul and drive. As an artist, I have been a dead man walking. I watch less films, I make less work, I spend less time drawing and painting, less time being in love with creating, and generally less time feeling like I once did. It has been a depressing and frustrating experience. It is as though my nerve endings have shortened, my eyes have closed up and my brain has shrivelled into a kind of walnut.
Much of this might be the results of a pandemic, a parental death, age and a general sense that things aren’t great in the world. It might also be due to the rise of AI, the endless sea of visual content and the sense that whatever we make, the world doesn’t care too much anymore for meaning. It’s just more stuff for the content heap - another thing for the void to swallow.
But fuck that - that’s no way to live! How have I (and perhaps we) so easily let tech companies, social media and new technologies erode and swallow up my passion and desire to create? I loved being creative. I loved painting, making, crafting and doing. I loved reading, watching and discovering the world through art. It was the thing that gave me meaning and energy. And I’m not interested in letting scrolling feeds and AI models erode that meaning in me. And so, here I am…
New Phone. Who Dis?
This blog and newsletter is simply a way for me to document my way back to that creative homeland. It is a quiet place for an internal rebellion to start. A space in which I can talk and share the things I’m making as I attempt to fall in love once again with the art life. It may be that not a single soul reads or looks upon this place, and I’m entirely happy with that (in fact, that thought it rather calming.) But if you are reading this, welcome.
My name is Jordan Buckner - I used to be an artist filmmaker person from the U.K. I typically made strange films for people like the BBC, BFI and Arts Council, but I also painted, animated and created various other things. I made short films like the one below.
But now, I am a lost person in search of a home once again. A person trying to remember how it feels to create things in freedom and without expectation. And a person who still has hope that creating things is a way of finding and communicating meaning in a world of weirdness and voids. Let the journey begin.
You can follow me on Substack here!