one of my favourite headcanons about neil is that he’s so trained to overreact to fucking anything that could potentially ruin his secrecy and that bleeds into normal life with the foxes
like he’s using a computer at some point
and it’s like that scene with rosa from brooklyn nine nine
the computer stops loading anything
so he smashes it to pieces
“I’ll pay for that”
then throws a couple hundred dollars on top of it and walks away
everyone at the library is confused, terrified and a bit turned on
one day neil gets a nosebleed so there’s blood on his shirt
he just asks andrew to drive him somewhere
so andrew just watches as neil goes into a laundromat
throws his clothes in the wash and then walks away and tells andrew to drive
andrew doesn’t say anything but neil literally just left
a brand new fucking shirt in the washing machine
and he knows they’re not coming back to get it
and that shirt looked really good on him
so what the fuck
he buys new shoes at one point so he takes the old ones and tosses them out the window
literally breaks the window
his face is completely flat
but kevin is yelling at him his face is going fucking red and the rest of the foxes are watching with open mouths
neil pretends none of them exist
or maybe he just really doesn’t see them
he very calmly walks out of the room
goes down the stairs
and the foxes watch through the broken window as neil approaches the shoes on the pavement
pulls something out from behind his back
(it’s kerosene)
he’s literally burning his old shoes like it’s a normal thing to do because he got new ones
and hes completely nonchalant about it too
“neil…. r u ok?”
neil responds with the usual, of course, and then when prompted for further explanation he says · “they could betray my location”
what
literally w h a T
matt is hugging neil to his chest and looking like he never wants to let go bc apparently this is shit neil has had to think about all his life and sometimes matt forgets that
dan is right beside him with a hand on neils shoulder looking like she’s about to fight the ashes that used to be ratty old shoes
(neil, whose face is pressed into matt’s chest, is so confused)
meanwhile nicky cannot stop fucking laughing
and it’s a bit surprising but aaron and kevin and allison are all laughing with him
“BETRAY HIM”
nicky keeps explaining with tears in his eyes that neil was afraid his old shoes were traitors
renee kind of just watches bc she finds it endearing
as she passes neil she just kind of whispers to him that he did good
even though it was clearly unnecessary
andrew completely walked out probably 10 minutes ago
he’s just waiting for the drama to stop
and he keeps telling himself “I don’t care I really don’t care”
I was laughing a bit but then "where was the kerosene" made me lose all of my shits and it's been literally five minutes and I'm still crying
:-) i never use tumblr anymore but this message made me want to congrats you have woken the beast from her slumber and now i will continue to wreak havoc on the realm i once considered home
“I hate you,” Andrew said casually. He took a last long drag from his cigarette and flicked it off the roof. “You were supposed to be a side effect of the drugs.”
i see your “andrew doesn’t care about or like nicky” and raise u “andrew appreciates everything nicky did for him growing up, from leaving his boyfriend in another country to helping him with school and paying for his food and clothes and shelter, and he respects and loves nicky in his own way”
also you’re really trying to tell me that nicky wasn’t a huge inspiration/role model for andrew especially in terms of what a mlm relationship could and should look like,,,,, yeah ok
one of my favourite headcanons about neil is that he’s so trained to overreact to fucking anything that could potentially ruin his secrecy and that bleeds into normal life with the foxes
like he’s using a computer at some point
and it’s like that scene with rosa from brooklyn nine nine
the computer stops loading anything
so he smashes it to pieces
“I’ll pay for that”
then throws a couple hundred dollars on top of it and walks away
everyone at the library is confused, terrified and a bit turned on
one day neil gets a nosebleed so there’s blood on his shirt
he just asks andrew to drive him somewhere
so andrew just watches as neil goes into a laundromat
throws his clothes in the wash and then walks away and tells andrew to drive
andrew doesn’t say anything but neil literally just left
a brand new fucking shirt in the washing machine
and he knows they’re not coming back to get it
and that shirt looked really good on him
so what the fuck
he buys new shoes at one point so he takes the old ones and tosses them out the window
literally breaks the window
his face is completely flat
but kevin is yelling at him his face is going fucking red and the rest of the foxes are watching with open mouths
neil pretends none of them exist
or maybe he just really doesn’t see them
he very calmly walks out of the room
goes down the stairs
and the foxes watch through the broken window as neil approaches the shoes on the pavement
pulls something out from behind his back
(it’s kerosene)
he’s literally burning his old shoes like it’s a normal thing to do because he got new ones
and hes completely nonchalant about it too
“neil…. r u ok?”
neil responds with the usual, of course, and then when prompted for further explanation he says · “they could betray my location”
what
literally w h a T
matt is hugging neil to his chest and looking like he never wants to let go bc apparently this is shit neil has had to think about all his life and sometimes matt forgets that
dan is right beside him with a hand on neils shoulder looking like she’s about to fight the ashes that used to be ratty old shoes
(neil, whose face is pressed into matt’s chest, is so confused)
meanwhile nicky cannot stop fucking laughing
and it’s a bit surprising but aaron and kevin and allison are all laughing with him
“BETRAY HIM”
nicky keeps explaining with tears in his eyes that neil was afraid his old shoes were traitors
renee kind of just watches bc she finds it endearing
as she passes neil she just kind of whispers to him that he did good
even though it was clearly unnecessary
andrew completely walked out probably 10 minutes ago
he’s just waiting for the drama to stop
and he keeps telling himself “I don’t care I really don’t care”
hello all!!! back a while ago i hit 1k followers and said i would write fics for you guys!! so far i’ve only gotten one done, but others will probably follow. you can still send prompts to my ask box, if you like, and ill get them done as soon as i can!! thanks again for following me even though i’ve been a little MIA recently; i’m hoping to get better about that. i love you guys!!
and thank you to @pipedreams-and-hallucinations for this prompt: neil gives andrew a back massage!
enjoy
The day had been long and rough. It wasn’t anything like summer training had been back at the Foxhole Court, when Neil had just started playing Exy. Back then it had all been life and death, and not working hard enough meant all the risk and none of the gain. Neil’s life was slower now. Practice and drills were difficult, but they were no longer fueled by the threat of something nipping at his heels. It wasn’t exactly a feeling he missed.
The entire team had been worked hard today. They were nearing national championships, which meant no room for breaks or second guesses. Of all of them, though, there was no doubt Andrew had been worked the hardest.
For the past few weeks, Andrew had been pushing the buttons of their coach, trying to get him to switch Andrew back to Neil’s line. Obviously, as a coach, Paul Hogan was not very pleased about this. His returning attacks at Andrew were neither merciful nor subtle.
With the biggest advocate of violence in Exy out of the equation for a few years now, regulations (especially among national and US Court players) by the ERC tightened on in-game toleration for hits. Even though Neil’s life was easily in the most stable and safe position he’d ever experienced, Andrew’s protection had diminished little. He had loosened his hold on Kevin’s leash to let him build a life and family with Thea, but the same could not be said for Neil. Regardless of the lack of threat against Neil for the first time in his life, Andrew seemed intent on staying on his line to keep an eye on other players. Neil wasn’t complaining, since it was the reason he always felt so safe, but it was times like these where that tendency grew to be a little difficult to manage.
However, with Andrew being who he is, it was unlikely for him to ever outright ask Coach Hogan for anything, let alone anyone else. Even Neil was only theorizing about what Andrew could possibly be irritated with Hogan about. Considering time change and small movements had lead Neil to believe it was the recent line switch between Andrew and a newer goalkeeper.
All of this had lead to Hogan taking out his frustration with Andrew’s lack of cooperation or obedience through drills targeting him alone. For the most part Andrew had been able to keep up. It wasn’t until the end that Andrew broke a sweat and stormed out of the stadium.
Neil knew there was no point in talking about it. Their ride home was silent, but not hostile. Either Andrew was too exhausted or too frustrated to speak, and Neil had learned long ago that pushing wasn’t the way to go. It was easier (and less dangerous) to work around it. Eventually Andrew would push past the issue, or he would get his way. That’s how things went with him, and probably how things were always going to go. Neil still got an occasional surprise every time Andrew seemed to back off of an issue between them when Neil explained his logic, but it was getting easier to predict. They were finding a pattern. A routine. Neil had never been familiar with emotional routine that didn’t involve burning evidence or stitching wounds; to have one that didn’t imply danger was a welcome change.
Andrew led the way into the apartment. He moved slowly, even though he tried not to show it, but Neil had experience deciphering Andrew and his movements. It was clear the man was worn out at the very least.
Routine continued with Andrew making a slow beeline to the kitchen. It was unhealthy but typical for Andrew to resort to ice cream after a match, if he had been pissed off enough (it had taken a while for Neil to make that connection, but now that he had, it was actually endearing). While Andrew occupied himself with sugar, Neil went to their bedroom.
Neil was quick to change. He had separate practice clothes and he was eager to get out of them and into something more comfortable. He grabbed some sweats for himself and another pair from Andrew’s closet. By the time he had gotten changed, Andrew was making his way into the room. If Neil had let him, Andrew probably would have beelined for the bed, barely spoken to or even glanced at Neil.
That’s why Neil stood in front of the doorway, sweatpants in hand.
“Move,” Andrew said. Back when they first met, Neil would have taken it as a lot more aggressive.
Neil only held out the sweatpants. Andrew looked down, and when he realized what Neil was doing, sighed and placed his ice cream down on the nearest table. “Are you going to watch me?”
“Is that a problem?” Neil replied.
Andrew didn’t answer. He made full eye-contact as he switched out of his athletic pants and back into sweats. “You’re still not moving.”
“You’re angry.”
“You’re annoying. I’m not a fan of accusations. You’re wearing the same pants as me. Are we finished with the observations?”
Neil would usually back off, but going to bed angry wasn’t in his itinerary tonight. He did his best not to roll his eyes and backed up to let Andrew pass. He let Andrew have his usual smoke out the window and crawled into bed to wait for him, allowing Andrew to choose how close he wanted to be to Neil.
It was difficult not to notice the tense look of Andrew’s shoulders, though. He kept rolling them, switching feet in a way that he didn’t usually -- he was in pain. Worked to the bone, tired and definitely sore. It was a sight Neil didn’t see often. Andrew usually chose to hide things like that, but had slowly gotten more and more comfortable allowing Neil to see him when he’s vulnerable.
“Hogan went too far,” Neil tried, gauging Andrew for his reaction.
There was a bit of silence at first. “Nice try, Josten.”
“I’m not prodding. I’m stating a fact.”
Andrew turned around, smoke in hand. “Yes, you’re right. He did go too far. Are you saying I didn’t deserve it?”
“No.”
“Good,” Andrew replied, “I would have called you a liar.” He flicked his smoke out the window and approached the bed. “Stop cataloguing me.”
“Stop forcing me to catalogue.”
“If you don’t stop looking at me, I’m getting rid of the fur.”
Neil smiled despite himself. Andrew sounded serious, but he never would have done so. The cats made their place feel like home as much as each other did -- Andrew was much more likely to start enjoying vegetables than to let the cats go.
Andrew had already stopped looking at Neil, but he had chosen a place on the bed that was quite close. It meant if he was upset at all, it wasn’t in Neil’s direction. In fact, it probably meant he was glad Neil was there. Of course he had never said so, but Neil was getting better and better at picking up clues.
“Yes or no?” Neil asked.
Andrew finally looked at him, eyes narrowing. “Yes,” he replied, but he did not stop looking at Neil.
Even though Andrew had said yes, Neil still moved slowly. He let his hands drift up to Andrew’s shoulders, careful not to move too quickly. Andrew was very particular about his back, and if Neil approached him from behind while out of sight, it never ended well.
“What do you think you’re doing?”
“Working out the knots in your shoulders.”
Andrew didn’t reply for a little while, but he didn’t pull away or ask Neil to stop. “Are you some kind of expert now?”
“Just relax.”
Normally that would have elicited an unhappy response from Andrew, but instead he fell silent. He allowed Neil to work on the muscles in his back, and eventually they started to ease. Andrew’s shoulders slowly seemed to lose their tension, and while he was clearly attempting not to make any noise, somehow Neil could tell he enjoyed it.
After Andrew had finally pulled away, he made an aborted movement in Neil’s direction, but decided against it. Instead of returning the favour, Andrew instead lead Neil to their master bath. It had been ages since either of them had taken a bath, let alone together, and allowed themselves to soak and relax as opposed to the rushed showers they usually took when either having sex or rushing to practice.
This was nicer. They let themselves forget about the day’s work and instead allowed themselves to be together, and to be at ease.
It was the life Neil had never even dreamed he could have.
