I'm cold.

Judas, 29. He/they. Not sure why i follow you? Its probably for my sideblog

[standardischu]

[grunge-k]

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#BPD #WheePD

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[housegoblin]

lifes so hard

[babushkaat]

[mantisliberationfront]

I think venus flytraps should be intelligent and ambulatory. I think they should get into the cupboards. I think they should purr when you pet them.

[prismatic-bell]

OP there is an entire Broadway musical explaining why you don’t want that

[bbcwhereareyou]

There’s a Broadway musical about them, too.

[bumblebeebats]

The crazy thing is, ninety-nine times out of a hundred, if you asked me on any given day "Would like to see a picture of some genitals?" my answer would be "😰 No, that's... No, thank you. I'm okay, actually." I have nothing but the utmost respect for people who do engage with the penis side of the internet, but personally, I've spent the better part of two decades doing all I can NOT to have pictures of dick and balls or sexy bikini babe buttcheeks blasted onto my retinas constantly. And yet... to be denied the penis? To have a jumped up pile of javascript tell me, a grown adult with an air fryer and an outstanding council tax bill, that I cannot be trusted to withstand the sight of a bare nipple unless I let it scan my drivers' license? I will move heaven and earth to see that fucking nipple, friend. I will walk a thousand miles barefoot on hot coals before I give you big brother bitches my passport number. A thousand miles through the desert with five VPNs just to press my face up against the glass and see the last uncensored picture of two My Little Pony Characters sixty-nining each other, and I don't even want! to look at it! But I will! I must! for the sake of our fucking democracy!

[transpigeon]

STOP! before you decide you are irretrievably doomed, try one of the following options:

transition

bdsm

iron supplements

[hazard-symbols-that-fuck-hard]

just learned about farming simulator

I mean, I already knew about it, but I just learned about it

Did you know that the target audience for Farming Simulator is actual real-world farmers? Because I didn’t. I just assumed that farmers probably don’t want to go home from a day of farming to do some (presumably highly inaccurate) virtual farming?

Like, imagine if the target audience for Power Washing Simulator was actual professional power washers.

Farming Sim gets sponsored by companies and shit to put ads in their games. But since the game is for farmers, all of the ads target farmers. Advertising products that, realistically, only farmers would be interested in. Aka John Deere tractors and shit.

There’s a fucking farming sim esports league. Where do they play? Agriculture conventions. not gaming conventions. agriculture conventions.

[hazard-symbols-that-fuck-hard]

post cancelled this is way funnier

[loaf--of--toast]

My buddy who is a farmer has the type of planter that drives itself across the field using GPS at a steady speed, and he just needs to turn it around at the end of each row. He added a little folding desk to his chair and plays farming simulator on it while he plants.

[hazard-symbols-that-fuck-hard]

okay playing farming simulator while farming is crazy

[needsmoreexplosions]

[nudityandnerdery]

Look, people hate the real world and come home and play The Sims.

[tfemflightinstructor]

[polybius-on-gameboy-deactivated]

“I think America should be taken by Canada instead” No, I think America should be returned to its Indigenous tribes, while Canada should return to the First Nations, the Inuit and the Métis.

“I think America should be taken by Denmark instead” No, I think America should be returned to its Indigenous tribes while Denmark returns Greenland to the Kalaallit, the Tunumiit and the Inughuit.

“I think Texas should be taken by Mexico” No, I think Texas should be returned to the Apache.

“I think Florida should be taken by Cuba” No, I think Florida should be returned to the Seminole.

“I think the Blue states should form their own country” No, I think the Blue states should return to the Chinook, the Yakama, the Nimíipuu, the Pomo, the Chumash, the Diné, the Wôbanaki, the Massachuset, the Haudenosaunee, the Pequot, the Lenape tribes, and the Inuit, the Unangax̂ and the Tlingit tribes of Alaska.

Stop roleplaying colonialism with a leftist coat of paint and give land back to its fucking Natives.

[dankmemeuniversity]

[b-a-m]

[great-tweets]

We just knew.

[awed-frog]

As a reminder, this is what she looks like:

[yougetsomekisses]

[larkiethings]

Also I hope everyone knows that Miette was fostered before she was adopted, and her foster mom loved that little kitten so much and always hoped she’d gone to a good home. this tweet got so popular that she recognized Miette and reached out to her current mom, and was able to share previously unseen baby pictures

[darthmelyanna]

You mean, she saw Miette was kicked like the football and did nothing to help put Mother in jail for a thousand years? I am appalled.

[tigerses]

her!!!

[madeofstarsandfairylights]

Baby Miette!!!

[ottermatopoeia]

Babe wake up new Miette lore just dropped

[devil-with-three-heads]

IT’S MIETTE!!!!