haha *rubs neck* u-uh this is actually my first time doing this? *gets on knees and positions himself* haha anythin for you right? bros bein bros *plays with his toes*
u want in arnie ? *uwu face*
lol why invite him when he’s judging us ugh -rolls eyes- but like if u want to join u can? not that i want u to or anything?
it was comedic, in a way, how every being & thing relied on time as if it held all answers. if things didn’t go well, it just wasn’t the right time. when others died, either at a young age or not, it was their time. how we told the days with the sun rising and counted the nights with the sun setting. and how, no matter how much he wanted to, rhenzy couldn’t get back the time he missed out on with jude. he tried to make up for it, stuck to the other like glue & spent most, if not all, his days with him but it still didn’t feel enough. maybe it was selfish or a stupid idea, but, rhenzy wanted all of him, not just bits and pieces. he allowed himself, and his now tanned skin, a break from the rays of the hawaiian sun as he laid in bed scrolling through his phone when a text from the same person intruding his thoughts popped on the screen. bare feet quickly landed on the floor as he ran towards the window and saw that jude really was leaned up against a car, arms folding over themselves. before he could think it through, his hands filled a random backpack with clothes he found laying around that most likely belonged to his roommate but he would apologize with a cute smile and probably with getting his ass beat later. he slips on his worn out white vans and runs down the stairs and out the house. “where are we going?” he prompts, ignoring a greeting and smiling big as he stops in front of jude, eyes enjoying the view before him.
jude grinned wide in return as rhen approached---and there’s the first breath of relief he can let slip past his lips. with rhen standing there, suddenly he isn’t sure why he was so nervous to begin with. “we’re going on a uh... small road trip. there’s this spot i found, about... two hours away?” he rubbed over the ink on his neck. a force of habit he’d never kick. “and i’m not even gonna try to pronounce the name of it, but---it’s got black sand and kind of a gorgeous view. i thought we could check it out together,” he explains with a simple, kind tilt of his head, before reaching out to take rhen’s bag and stick it in the back seat. “so get your ass in the car and we can get a move on. i wanna get there before sunset. y’know, for good pictures or whatever.”
once in the car, he couldn’t drive away from the villa fast enough. while jude did love their friends and the home away from home they’d made here for themselves, there was always a part of him that needed to escape from it for a while. too many heads under one roof and whatnot, making it too hard for him to think. especially about this thing he and rhen were doing. whatever it was. and for him to figure it out, well, he could do without all the meddling. “you can take over the music,” he offered---quite the invitation from jude ahn, resident music snob. but for as long as he’d known rhenzy, the other boy had been mostly exempt from his snobbish tendencies. maybe it was because of all the idiots from summer camp that rhen threatened for jude, or the way he’d always pick him over anyone else. rhen had always been allowed past that barrier he put up. and those memories were too fond to him, despite knowing he had the heaviest hand in tarnishing them. but he’d hold onto whatever he could, because if the past few weeks with rhen taught jude anything, it’s that they were still the same. still the same mirrors of each other. still the same dumb kids with skinned knees and bad haircuts who were always okay as long as they were together. and it was comforting---something for jude to cling to when all he really wanted was to retreat into himself.
jade was sat by the edge of the pool, watching yuki wade around and come back to the steps. she was so proud watching her pup jump back into the pool even after she would gently put her back up onto ground next to her. she felt like she’d stolen yuki from that puppy store so long ago, and the pup certainly wasn’t as small as she was back then. jade looked up at jude with a smile as he came to sit beside her, but it faded once he announced he was the bearer of bad news. “what… how bad?” she said quietly, coaxing yuki out of the water. when she was told it was about bear, she knew it was bad. really bad–especially if jude was the one telling her instead of them. “what’s wrong with him? why didn’t mom or dad call me?” she said, eyes already watering. it wasn’t rocket science. it wasn’t too far-fetched to expect the worst. unsure if she wanted to know the answer, jade asked her question anyway. “…what happened to bear? what did they do to him?”
jude exhaled before finding the right words to continue. it was better this way. too vivid were his own memories of losing sasha all those years ago and being lied to about what happened to her. he knew his sister deserved a gentle kind of honesty. that’s the kind of person she was. “to start off, it wasn’t their fault, and they really did everything they could for him...” he began, looking down at their hands before looking back up at her. “he got sick after eating something he shouldn’t have. when mom and dad noticed, they tried taking him to the vet to get it fixed. really, they wanted to try anything they could, but the surgery just---it would have been too expensive. and too far away to even get there in time... they made the best decision they could in the moment, so that he wouldn’t suffer or be in pain...” he squeezed her hand tighter. “and he wasn’t in any pain, jade. but i’m so sorry, and i’m right here for you.”
how stupid. he was nervous. and for what? he couldn’t understand. rarely did anything make jude too nervous these days, especially not a day spent with someone whose face he was so very well acquainted with. yet here he was, restlessly shuffling the car keys in his hand as he pulled out his phone to text rhen. ‘hey. we’re goin on a trip today. possibly overnight... so sorry if u had plans. meet me outside the house asap :P’, he shot off the message, quickly tucking his phone back into his pocket and leaning back against the car as he heaved a sigh. maybe it was all the planning he put into this that had his fingers fumbling just the slightest bit as he double-checked the car and everything inside it. because maybe this was lame; a nostalgic venture back to a childhood friendship both of them missed too dearly, and worked so hard the past few months to resalvage the pieces of. he wanted this to be right. because things between him and rhen had such a nasty habit of going so, so wrong. and they’d missed out on far too much of each other’s lives. it wasn’t supposed to be that way, and it wasn’t gonna be like that anymore. not if jude had any say in it, at least. this was gonna end up just fine, he reassured himself, arms crossing over his chest as he waited.
a somber air hung over him as he ended the call with his mom. he can’t remember the last time she sounded so sad over the phone, not when all their calls for the past year had been happy check ups. this was nowhere near that. he set his phone down, steeling himself for a conversation he wasn’t sure he was ready to have with jade, but knew he needed to. his parents were right, she had to hear it from him. after a deep breath and squeezing his fists tight a couple times, he got up to go find her where he’d last seen her.
stepping out of the villa, he approached jade by the pool, thankful she wasn’t surrounded by her usual entourage---but instead with yuki, watching the small dog paddle through the water. “hey,” he spoke softly, sitting beside her, unsure of where to start. “listen... i just got off the phone with mom and dad. they uh, they had some bad news.” taking his sister’s hand, he held it snugly in his own as he looked up at her. “it’s about bear, jade. i don’t know if you want to take yuki out of the water... and hold onto her maybe...”
teagan: what if someone did something and i know the person did something but i never said something because if i said something then the person who did the something would be upset because the person who did something did something involving another person who did something and THAT person doesnt know that the other person knows that they did something but the something the person did actually caused this person to do the something they did
teagan: do u get my dilemma
jude: uh. no.
jude: /my/ dilemma is that i don't know what language u sent this message in
“you know i’m a horrible friend. i think you’re well aware and i’m well aware. the whole house may be as well?” graham’s head tilted to one side as his eyes scanned the familiarity of jude’s features. he’s never fought with the other, instead to open up the tsundere he would only be a hummingbird flying around him and about. it was enough to explain their relationship but these days, it was mostly graham being reserved to himself. “jude i’m sorry, okay?” for once his voice remained steady and firm, “you and i have been friends for so long and i ‘m sorry for breaking a trust and your heart.” he pleaded along with a long sigh falling from his lips. “jude i can’t take back what i did but i can try and make it right and i’m sorry i didn’t come back sooner or apologize sooner but, because i didn’t think you ever wanted to see my face or anything but whatever this is worth.. i’m so so so sorry.”
jude let him speak. after everything that went down, he’d give him that. no tuning out, and no storming off. because this time at least, it felt real. like something he should hear. and there would always be some softer side of him that refused to believe graham didn’t care about hurting him---in spite of the harsher side that disagreed. he watched him until he was done speaking, at which point his eyes shifted somewhere off to the side, a hand coming up to rub over the back of his neck. despite wanting nothing more than this apology, he wasn’t quite sure what to do with it. even with the words ‘sorry’ out there in the open, it was hard to be vulnerable again in front of someone once they’d broken your trust. “this was... all i really needed from you, you know?” he mumbled, eyes finding graham’s face once again. he’d noticed the change in the other boy’s demeanor lately, even with the distance he kept. and it was an odd feeling---wanting to stay away and be angry, yet still wanting to be there for him somehow. a stupid, odd feeling. “i guess it just felt like... i don’t know, like you didn’t care about me. and i never got that from you before. but... i believe you,” he nodded. “i believe you, and i’m just tired of being upset.”
jude sebastian ahn was born in the dead of a chilly winter night on december 28th, at 3:06am in cherry hill, new jersey. looking over his chart and the descriptors of the signs he fell under, i honestly can’t say i disagreed with many of them. perhaps the structured rigidness described in capricorns is a bit less present in jude’s personality, but overall everything does seem to match pretty well.
okay so this is REALLY LENGTHY, but all you really have to read are the bullet points! those are my comments hehe. the big blocks of text are just copied from sites.
CAPRICORN SUN
Capricorn is a feet-on-the-ground, eye-on-the-prize sign. Those with Sun in Capricorn have a realistic, grounded approach to life that can be seen no matter how dreamy the rest of the birth chart suggests. These people know how to do things, and to get things done. Capricorns can sometimes be rather lonely people, although they rarely let it show. They are often a little reserved--even standoffish. This is generally because they value all things practical, and they'll seldom wear their emotions on their sleeves, unless they have a particularly flamboyant Moon sign. Many Capricorns have mastered the art of making people laugh. Their sense of humor can be of the deadpan variety--they're generally excellent at keeping a straight face. They can be bitingly sarcastic, too.
these are parts of jude’s sun sign i agreed with most. he’s very much a capricorn in the sense that he’s got an idea of where he wants his life to go (professionally) and knows what he needs to do to get there. he’s ambitious and very hardworking when it comes to his art! he can also come off as cold despite not being so, and values authenticity in others, as well as being the chill, down-to-earth type that’s typically seen in earth signs.
ARIES MOON
High-spirited and courageous, you are a fighter when your emotions are aroused. The degree of force and drive that you can bring to any effort sometimes surprises others. You have hair-trigger reactions to specific stimuli and tend to "let it all hang out." You sometimes act before you think and do things on the spur of the moment, and that sometimes gets you into trouble. Your moods change quickly -- you have quite a temper, but you don't hold grudges. Very independent, with an extremely strong and forceful personality, you are known for being impulsive, careless, reckless, foolhardy, rash and daring.
his moon sign i have to admit i’m a bit on the fence about. aries moons are described in a very brash and hyperactive way which i wouldn’t say matches jude very well, specifically one part i’d read that said aries moons aren’t sulky and don’t withdraw when they’re upset, which is exactly what jude does (though he can be a bit explosive in certain situations). however, he can be very impulsive, careless, and reckless when it suits him. while he’s generally calm, it only takes the slightest hint of competition for him to morph into the more reckless aries moon type. really, he’s got a bit of a duality to himself when it comes to this.
SCORPIO RISING
You tend to be quiet, reserved, secretive and, at times, quite difficult to understand. Others notice your deep emotions and feelings and wonder how to draw you out. Stubborn and tough, you fight for any position you believe in. You are very resourceful and formidable when you become angered or upset about something. You enjoy living life at the cutting edge -- for you life must be experienced intensely and totally. Quite courageous, you are willing to take calculated risks. Easily hurt by others, you often strike back with bitter sarcasm. Sensitive and curious, you are concerned with the deeper mysteries of human psychology. Once you have become interested in any subject, you pursue it with total fanaticism.
don’t have much to say about this, the entire thing is accurate. jude in a nutshell.
CAPRICORN MARS
With fiery Mars in the more orderly sign of Capricorn, natives with this position have a subdued and controlled style of approaching life. Most don't come across as particularly enthusiastic; rather, theirs is a low-key but determined energy. Mars in Capricorn natives like to be on top of things. They are generally goal-oriented and focused people who are not afraid of hard work. Most are achievers by nature, and many possess well-defined ambitions--well-defined to themselves more than anything. They're not particularly flashy people, but their drive to succeed and to make their lives secure is strong, even if it's not right out there for the world to see. Anger is expressed in a rather cool, level-headed way with this position of Mars. Self-control is strong when it comes to expressing anger, drive, energy, and sexuality.
again, i gotta say jude isn’t as rigid as his capricorn alignments suggest, but i do believe this matches him well when considering other sources i’ve read from. they describe capricorn mars as having a desire to be in control and i definitely see that in jude. also, here’s a fun tidbit i got from a post about mars signs and sex, since mars signs are often associated with drive and sexuality: ( capricorn: very kinky, dominant in bed. roleplays involving them being a police officer or an authority figure of some kind. probably also likes handcuffs and ropes, although never on themselves. better than average stamina, lots of force and determination in their rhythm lmao. daddy doms. ) LMAO
AQUARIUS VENUS
Venus in Aquarius people try to impress you with their open-minded, future-thinking spirit. They want you to see them as unique, rebellious, and a little provocative. They are attractive when they are acting a little aloof. They want you to acknowledge and appreciate that they don't follow the beaten track in matters of the heart. Venus in Aquarius men and women are attracted to unusual or unconventional relationships. They don't want to follow all the rules, although they may make quite a few of their own. They can appear quite standoffish at times, and are threatened by restrictions of any kind. Emotional types may be put off by their detached manner in love. Venus in Aquarius wants you to love them for their intellect, and to admire their visions. They value lovers who are also good friends, and they avoid emotional displays or confrontations like the plague. Dream along with them, and don't fence them in. They need space and will happily return the favor, giving you lots of room to breathe and to be yourself.
so this one is just really funny to me, because it is pretty accurate. i wouldn’t say he’s as detached as aquarius venus’ are described to be when he’s in a relationship, but he definitely is when he isn’t in one. he’s definitely no stranger to getting around casually, and certainly keeps an open mind. probably wouldn’t mind being in an open or poly relationship either.
CANCER LILITH
When Lilith is with the Moon, things can be challenging. Turbulent, or even stubborn emotions. Fear, especially of abandonment and change. Sometimes can become smothering, or overly worrisome. This placement can be vindictive and petty, often going out of their way to prove their point or spite someone. Lilith in Cancer often feels unappreciated and unnoticed, and their struggles are harder to overcome than most. Can have a harsh tongue, but is very good at hiding their true feelings and putting on a sweet face. This placement can have a tendency to “drag others down with them”, especially when their mood is sour.
okay, so lilith signs are described to be you at your very worst. you at your ugliest and most destructive. i’d say this is pretty accurate for jude, as his insecurities do lie in feeling unwanted/unnoticed/left behind by people he cares about, and he can be very spiteful when he feels he’s been wronged.
RHENZY: what about now
RHENZY: im like tinkerbell
RHENZY: need attention to live :)
RHENZY: well . NOW ill never be mad at u :/
JUDE: there u go. freakin adorable.
JUDE: tinkerbell huh
JUDE: i see it
JUDE: that nickname could stick y’kno
JUDE: i sure hope so :/ cause i like missed u or whatever ://
annaxmalina
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izzy806
