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PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
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@justashortinsomniac
~~~TITLE PAGE~~~
“Hello! I’m Mendel Weisenbachfeld! My step-son Jason made me create a “Tumblr” account! I am married to my lovely wife Trina! I am a psychiatrist and I am NOT self conscious about my height! Heheh.. Hit me up if you ever wanna go fishing!”
MOD UNDER CUT
trina treated herself to a glass of wine this morning
and then jason woke up and played another game of chess
that made her treat herself to 3 glasses.
“His stepfather is a psychiatrist, although not a very good one, (don’t tell Mendel I said that…) and we still don’t know why he plays chess alone. It’s a two person game.”
“I’m an awesome psychiatrist!”
hi mendel. 🔥
(@il0vechess)
“I did your mum.”
I know. Be quieter next time. I was scared.
“Does much change when you go to your dads house?”
no not really... I want my own house!
“Well you don’t have money so tough luck kid.”
yeah but you have money I can take. boom.
“I don’t have that much money, c’mon.”
“Jason…you know that you can’t get your own house. You can’t even legally have a job yet.”
Yeah but you, dad, Mendel, and Whizzer have money that I can easily have.
“Not easily…what on earth makes you think that any one of us would just give up enough money for you to get a house?”
Whizzer would! Right @i-love-baseball?
Uhhh I don’t have much money kid, I sold my apartment out to move in with your father, remember?
DARN IT
“I’ll buy you a chess set.”
“Mendel, no. He already had too many, because you keep buying him them. You can’t just bribe him with chess every time you want him to be on your side. It’s not healthy, you should know that of all people.”
But it DOES make everything better. Chess Set = Forgiveness
I’m such a good dad
Whizzer is still my favorite
hi mendel. 🔥
(@il0vechess)
“I did your mum.”
I know. Be quieter next time. I was scared.
“Does much change when you go to your dads house?”
no not really... I want my own house!
“Well you don’t have money so tough luck kid.”
yeah but you have money I can take. boom.
“I don’t have that much money, c’mon.”
“Jason…you know that you can’t get your own house. You can’t even legally have a job yet.”
Yeah but you, dad, Mendel, and Whizzer have money that I can easily have.
“Not easily…what on earth makes you think that any one of us would just give up enough money for you to get a house?”
Whizzer would! Right @i-love-baseball?
Uhhh I don’t have much money kid, I sold my apartment out to move in with your father, remember?
DARN IT
“I’ll buy you a chess set.”
“Mendel, no. He already had too many, because you keep buying him them. You can’t just bribe him with chess every time you want him to be on your side. It’s not healthy, you should know that of all people.”
But it DOES make everything better. Chess Set = Forgiveness
I’m such a good dad
I think Mendel loves his wife
“Wife 🥰”
hi mendel. 🔥
(@il0vechess)
“I did your mum.”
I know. Be quieter next time. I was scared.
“Does much change when you go to your dads house?”
no not really... I want my own house!
“Well you don’t have money so tough luck kid.”
yeah but you have money I can take. boom.
“I don’t have that much money, c’mon.”
“Jason…you know that you can’t get your own house. You can’t even legally have a job yet.”
Yeah but you, dad, Mendel, and Whizzer have money that I can easily have.
“Not easily…what on earth makes you think that any one of us would just give up enough money for you to get a house?”
Whizzer would! Right @i-love-baseball?
Uhhh I don’t have much money kid, I sold my apartment out to move in with your father, remember?
DARN IT
“I’ll buy you a chess set.”
“Mendel, no. He already had too many, because you keep buying him them. You can’t just bribe him with chess every time you want him to be on your side. It’s not healthy, you should know that of all people.”
“Buzzkill.”
hi mendel. 🔥
(@il0vechess)
“I did your mum.”
I know. Be quieter next time. I was scared.
“Does much change when you go to your dads house?”
no not really... I want my own house!
“Well you don’t have money so tough luck kid.”
yeah but you have money I can take. boom.
“I don’t have that much money, c’mon.”
“Jason…you know that you can’t get your own house. You can’t even legally have a job yet.”
Yeah but you, dad, Mendel, and Whizzer have money that I can easily have.
“Not easily…what on earth makes you think that any one of us would just give up enough money for you to get a house?”
Whizzer would! Right @i-love-baseball?
Uhhh I don’t have much money kid, I sold my apartment out to move in with your father, remember?
DARN IT
“I’ll buy you a chess set.”
hi mendel. 🔥
(@il0vechess)
“I did your mum.”
I know. Be quieter next time. I was scared.
“Does much change when you go to your dads house?”
no not really... I want my own house!
“Well you don’t have money so tough luck kid.”
yeah but you have money I can take. boom.
“I don’t have that much money, c’mon.”
“Jason…you know that you can’t get your own house. You can’t even legally have a job yet.”
Yeah but you, dad, Mendel, and Whizzer have money that I can easily have.
“Not easily…what on earth makes you think that any one of us would just give up enough money for you to get a house?”
Whizzer would! Right @i-love-baseball?
“Whizzer, don’t encourage him.”
GIMME UR FIVE TOP SONGS AND SEND THIS TO THE TEN MOST RECENT PEEPS IN UR NOTIFS!!!
“Um..
uh..
any song by Paul Simon.”
hi mendel. 🔥
(@il0vechess)
“I did your mum.”
I know. Be quieter next time. I was scared.
“Does much change when you go to your dads house?”
no not really... I want my own house!
“Well you don’t have money so tough luck kid.”
yeah but you have money I can take. boom.
“I don’t have that much money, c’mon.”
hi mendel. 🔥
(@il0vechess)
“I did your mum.”
I know. Be quieter next time. I was scared.
“Does much change when you go to your dads house?”
no not really... I want my own house!
“Well you don’t have money so tough luck kid.”
hi mendel. 🔥
(@il0vechess)
“I did your mum.”
I know. Be quieter next time. I was scared.
“Does much change when you go to your dads house?”
hi mendel. 🔥
(@il0vechess)
“I did your mum.”
Hi Mendel. Charlotte has been working a lot of late shifts and Marvin has been busy and I’m kinda lonely. What should I do?
“Don’t ask me questions.”
33 years ago today falsettos came out on broadway :D!!
trina is beautiful. mendel cannot handle all that.
“She is!
It’s scary at times.”
Adopt me please, I need a father!!
#end the Mendel hate
#pls Mendel be my father!!!!!!
“I-I have a son!!
Um..
I guess I can ask Trina?…
wait, PEOPLE ARE HATING ME?!”
