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@justslaggingaround
yungblud this was MAAAAAAD … congratulations hayley and grace. thankyou so much for letting me be apart of such a special moment in your lives. this is what this community is about man… spread the fuckin love and unite each other! this made me so happy man 😭🖤
I’ve rewatched the ad at least three times to try and figure out why some folks are angry with it and I’m at a loss. All I see here is: Be a better human. Set a better example. Encouraging strength of character and integrity over typical “machismo”.
I heard something the other day that I had never really thought about before. Someone mentioned to me that whenever you catch yourself missing someone who left your life, you should remind yourself that them not being part of your present is a consistent choice they make every day. They wake up and decide to maintain the silence. They’re indifferent as to whether the space between you gets larger. And that in itself is pretty powerful closure.
How I Teach Men Not To Talk Over Me: from one feminist to another, when basic respect is lagging and conversations are impossible
I’ve done this to several men, and they catch on rather quickly. You’ll be able to have a conversation right then and there, and it works long term too - they might’ve forgot their manners by the time you talk to them again, but by repeating this, they’ll eventually learn to let you talk without you having to do this at the start of every convo. Source: I have a very stubborn older brother, who eventually learned too.
1. When they interrupt you, stop talking. Don’t try to raise your voice or battle them. Be completely quiet and wait.
2. Ignore everything they’re saying. Do not actually listen - just wait until they shut up. Don’t make a point of anything they say, do not answer to anything they say, do not refer to anything they say here. Literally do not listen a single word. Let them rant as long as they want.
3. When they finally shut up and wait for your reaction, say: ”I wasn’t done talking.”
4. Start over whatever you were saying when they interrupted you. I don’t care if it was a 10-minute explanation of rocket science. Start. Over. Repeat you original thought, but do not add anything related to what they just said while talking over you. That gives them the idea that it’s okay to interrupt you, you’ll still listen and pay attention and they’ll get their point clear without having to listen to yours. (It’s especially funny when you get done and they expect you to keep going talking about whatever they talked over you. The face when it sinks in that you didn’t listen a single word is glorious.)
5. If they interrupt you again, return to step 1. If you find yourself repeating the cycle over 3 times, tell them: ”you’re not letting me speak. Either you listen and wait for your turn, or our conversation ends here.” If they try to make excuses, laugh it off or keep interrupting, end the conversation. Prove them that if they wont let you speak, they’re not worth your time.
Why does this work? First, because sometimes talking over is internalized and men don’t actually notice they’re doing it. Being vocally called out makes them realize it and pay attention to it - especially if it happens more than once. Secondly, by refusing to aknowledge anything they say when they interrupt you, they’ll soon realize they will not get their own point across if they keep doing that. Peoole and especially men have the need to be heard and paid attention to when they talk - when you make it clear that by talking over you, they will not have your attention, they’ll learn to wait until you’re done, because they know that’s when you will be paying attention and actually listening.
Go my darlings. Have some actual conversations where your point of view is just as valid as his. Demand the basic respect of being heard. You can actually have some interesting conversations with men when they’re forced to listen too, when being louder is not going to make them feel like they’re dominating the conversation or winning the argument.
Learn To Say
No, to people when you don’t feel like hanging out
No, to people who don’t deserve your time
No, to people that make you feel uncomfortable
No, to people that threaten your happiness
No, to people that don’t let you be yourself
No, to people that make you ashamed for what you like
Things they never told me about losing weight.
1. Buy some better cold weather clothing. You are going to get cold. 2. Buy some decent skin lotion and use it frequently. Your skin is going to retract a bit, and a bit of lotion does wonders for helping it firm up smoother, and stops it drying out. 3. You may have excess skin. This is normal, and not something to panic about/beat yourself up about. 4. Weight loss will start fast but slow rapidly. When you are very over weight, you will find that the weight falls off you initially, but it’s a curve, and it WILL slow down as your body isn’t using up as many calories just existing. This is good. This is healthy. You have not done anything wrong. 5. It won’t be easy. Those people who tell you it’s easy ? They are liars. It’s hard. It’s worth it … but it’s hard. 6. You are amazing and beautiful at every point of your journey. Some people will try to convince you that you are more important or more approachable because you are slimmer. Fuck that noise. You are the same person you always have been, and your value was never determined by a number.
Do it.
Do it for every time you cried over your body.
Do it for every time you hated what you saw in the mirror.
Do it for everyone who said you couldn’t.
Do it for the “have you lost weight”s
Do it for the double takes.
Do it for me.
Do it for you.
Do it for us.
We all believe in you.
You can do this.
Hey
.
I had the best day at work today, the best I’ve had in a very long time.
I’m trying stop being the person i want to be and trying to start being the person i need to be.
If you’re reading this please give yourself rest and take time for yourself, you are doing your best but you also deserve peace
I’m screaming??? So my cat knows I get upset when he steps on my paintings (not yelling or anything I think he just sees me spend hours trying to cover up what his paws do) in my “studio” which is a crammed small storage closet with painting all over the floor drying , so like I’m in there rn and I saw him try to get to point A to point b but it was impossible for him to jump over so like he realized the matte parts were dry and like he was stepping on the corners of the painting and every step he’d look at his paw to see if he fucked up and honestly it was the most thoughtful thing ever I don’t ever wanna hear anyone ever say that cats don’t care
I beg you, if this ever happens again, get a video
