Taurice

he/him, yes, my hair’s natural. caffeine connoisseur | killed my circadian rhythm with my bare hands | interrogation specialist. once got told to take a hike and took it incredibly literally. favorite peaks I ever saw were your mom’s. always up, less often online 🏔️

[justtaurice]

[[SCP OC RP BLOG]]

owned by oopsarboreal!

posts are made in-character for Taurice unless tagged #ooc

new to Taurice/not sure what to ask? Check out his common knowledge for lil fun facts about him!

[thedeer187]

wow

[justtaurice]

ew what the fuck

[officehoursofglass]

they taught the shrink how to log into tumblr oh my gods this is the platform where anyone can go anon and say anything and you're telling everyone youre a therapist?? you must have some CRAZY shit rotting in that inbox, Doc anyway, looking forward to session #854 or something of dodging questions till u give up. im still mad that its 12:30 now. noon was my time. whos got the noon now. tell me and I will respectfully defeat them in combat for the noon slot

-@justtaurice

Well, I don't see why I wouldn't mention being a therapist! If there are people on tumblr who wanna talk, then so be it :) though, I suppose there are some... er... crazy things in my inbox.... mostly people trying to. Ummm.. kiss me ??

You know, you could always try not dodging my questions, right? About the time, I'm sorry it's a bit later than you'd choose. Erm, my sessions with Al,, Er.. dr. Clef proved to need a bit of extra time. I'm sure you understand how... he is.

[justtaurice]

The day I walk in, sit down, and let you do your job is the day you realize I was right about skinwalkers

Also censor that name we talked about this. rare occasion I know

[justtaurice]

clef vs taurice who wins

I'm gonna put you two in a room together with no guns. I wanna see what happens

WHO TOLD YOU ABOUT CLEF IN RELATION TO ME WHATEVER THEY SAID AINT TRUE AND IS A FABRICATION I GOT NO RELATION NOR ANY RELEVANT HISTORY WITH SAID BLOND DIRECTOR

[justtaurice]

Taurice you weren't supposed to see that....please don't tell anyone that I'm actually three goats in a trench coat ok? It's been four months and nobody in the site has noticed yet. I wanna keep it that way ok?

Four months? Really? Four months of hooves scuffing linoleum and eating goat lunch and smelling like a goat and yer tellin me nobody's noticed. Uh-huh. I think they noticed day 2 and no one's said nothin to preserve your goat feelings actually

[justtaurice]

copying my swag

[justtaurice]

Listen to the song jumper by waterflame I grantee you’ll like it

I can’t let them know I lowkey jammed out to this..

[justtaurice]

If you had to choose… between

No long hair

or no energy drinks

Which one would you pick

Third option I throw myself off a cliff

seriously tho energy drinks. you shoulda said caffeine bro! I can still drink coffee or pop tabs WHILE swishing my beautiful luscious mane in this scenario

[justtaurice]

Hypothetical question, what would you do if you found a dragonet (a baby dragon, about the size of a kitten) in your office? :3

ACTUALLY LOSE MY SHIT /POS dragons are like. i always thought they were real as a kid, yknow? now I work with real breathin cryptids and myths and shit on the daily! it NEVER gets old im telling ya that wasn't JUST a hypothetical, I'm assuming. right. right

[justtaurice]

i love loathe you

thank you internet stranger! glad im making you confused. thats the goal

[justtaurice]

Hey, just so you know, someone snitched on you to Clef for stealing sandwiches from the west wing break room fridge. I think a few were his or something idk.

WOHMY WWOAHMYGODS PLEASE say yer kidding IT WAS JUST HAM AND CHEESE who even gaf about ham and cheese amirite. generic ass sandwhich. oohmyogo im shakin i need to climb a tree posthast

[justtaurice]

taurice im gay

for me? 🥺

[justtaurice]

Taurice dear, please stop posing in photos with classified documents clearly in view! You know how HR feels about such actions...

-@doctor-cello

sometimes the lighting is just right and you can’t even waste time fixing the background ok. gotta catch that soft amber glow Cells. Cells we know this

but yeah I am getting angry emails about this

WHO CARESSS I have this one security guard who picks fights w me on Facebook still even tho our beef was four years ago. this is nothin

[justtaurice]

What would you do if I replaced everything.single. energy.drink with strawberry favored battery acid :3

Your whatever the hell you think of me,

- Gradient H Windrunner

jokes on you energy drinks are already flavored battery acid. I wouldn't notice until it was too late and I was dead! nobody write that down also u are basically my sister in law do NAWT be shy like that

[justtaurice]

may i have a monster? *cat glug glug image*

I am open to TRADES I'm not a fridge. what do yall think they pay me here

[justtaurice]

HOW DID I NOT REALIZE HE HAS LIKE 50 ASKS HELP IM SO SORRY

[justtaurice]

Hold still, Taurine…

I’m just going to take your hair… It won’t hurt a bit…

-The Balderer, the eldritch horror, hair thief, making folks balder since 1963.

NO PLEASE ITS ALL I HAVE LEFT