Anuskatrieswriting

[bhloomest]

[kundalini33-deactivated20260510]

If someone told me this, I’d prob cry

[petaltexturedskies]

Rainer Maria Rilke, in a letter to Sidonie Nádherná, dated 1 August 1913

[miseducatedmelanicmuse]

[letsbelonelytogetherr]

— Melissa Cox

[mournfulroses]

Jeanette Winterson, from "One Aladdin Two Lamps," originally published in November 2025

[stay-close]

“Stop asking me to trust you while I’m still coughing water up from the last time you let me drown.”

— Unknown

[justwritingsstuff]

It feels like a cruel twist of fate that I must bleed, burn and break myself for a dream so effortlessly handed to those who barely lift a finger while I, despite the fire I carry am left with empty hands.

I’ve waited.I’ve endured.Held on through the silence,believing just maybe something good would come from all this pain.

But I’ve chased with everything I had,torn myself open again and again, only to be met with emptiness.

Now there’s a hollow space inside me,like I’ve traded parts of myself for hopes that never arrived.

If this is what patience feels like this ache, this quiet erosion then maybe I don’t want it anymore.

Maybe it’s better to be restless and win than to wait forever and still lose.

Because the world doesn’t see the fight when you come back with nothing.

And it hurts to give everything only to be seen as someone who didn’t try hard enough.

[ashstfu]

and in the next fifty years, you will ache and you will glow. you will fall in love with people who don’t stay and still carry their names like pressed flowers in the folds of your memory. you will eat meals alone and meals with people who make you laugh so hard you forget the sting of silence. there will be mornings you can’t get out of bed and nights where you walk home humming under a sky so wide it forgives you. you’ll cry in public and smile at strangers and sometimes it’ll be the same thing. you’ll hear a song that reminds you of someone you promised you’d never forget and you’ll realize you already have, a little. you’ll outgrow versions of yourself you once thought permanent and mourn them like old friends and still you will keep going. you’ll see sunsets that make your chest tighten. you’ll be held when you least expect it. you’ll feel the cold on your face and remember what it means to be alive. and it won’t always be gentle but it will be yours.

[persianmom-deactivated20251026]

agonizing over all the time you wasted or lost is useless. it’s gone now. you survived in the only way you knew how. doesn’t your survival deserve some recognition too?

[persianmom-deactivated20251026]

like toni morrison said, “sometimes you don't survive whole, you just survive in part. but the grandeur of life is that attempt. it’s not about that solution. it is about being as fearless as one can, and behaving as beautifully as one can, under completely impossible circumstances.”

[kosmogrl]

[justwritingsstuff]

Beasts within me

I was going down a narrow road — the kind that steals its breath with every step you make. The air had been dense, heavier than usual

And then I sensed it. A presence. Heavy, motionless, and solid, behind me like a copy shadow. A monster that I could not see but could sense in every corner of my spine.

I picked up pace. So did it.The faster I walked, the more it followed.

Unstoppable. Unrelenting.

The road was a twist of fear and confusion, and I kept on, hoping to outwalk it.

And then —the road stretched out before me. Wide and full.

I felt relived ,it felt as if i had outrun it.

I pressed my chest against the chilly glass of a stranger's automobile window.

I breathed in.I felt safe.

Or at least I had thought so.

Then I opened my eyes and sensed a of a heavy breathing behind. I turned around, ready to face the monster that had chased me into the light.

And then i turned around to see no one else but myself.

Not the me that the world sees —but the version I had suppressed.

Powerful. Fearless. Untamed.

The part of myself that would not cower.

I had not been running from a monster.

I had been running from my own strength.

From the fire that lived in my bones.

From the voice that would not be stilled.

From the woman I was growing into.

And in that instant, I knew:

She was not there to kill me.

She had come to insist on my coming back.

I am the storm I'd been afraid of.

I am the force I'd tried to escape.

And I am done running.

[rythms-of-synthax-deactivated20]

Quote of the day

[lovinganddreaming]

asking myself “is this really who i want to be forever?” a lot lately

[kosmogrl]

[vexheart]

[cheers-to-myself]

x

[mournfulroses]

Virginia Woolf, from a diary entry written c. April 1929, featured in Selected Diaries

[justwritingsstuff]

You ask me how am I and I just nod and say I'm fine. What a beautifully rehearsed line that it almost feels real. How do I explain to you that there is a monster thrashing at my ribs,scratching at the walls of my heart and screaming to set free. How do I explain to you that it has been wrapping it's arms around my neck waiting for me the night that I am too afraid to fight.

But It cannot or do I say I don't allow it to. I have fought too hard to keep it caged . Instead now it has slowly consumed me unraveling me thread by thread . now it feels like it has not been living inside me but it has been a part of me.

I don't know the solution to it. I just hope one morning I wake up and feel the scars carved on my heart have vanished .I will feel the warmth of the sun not just on my skin but the very depth of my being.And on that day I will know I am alive again.