late bloomer?
about a decade ago read a post from dave mcclure - ‘Late Bloomer, Not a Loser. (I Hope)’ [the original medium post no longer exists.]
it resonated with me and for some odd reason, several years later still came to mind
i was always smart… relatively… took honours, ap, and advanced math classes in middle and high school. sometimes out of spite, others because certain teachers believed i was actually smart and / or talented. the pressure of high expectations of others place upon you is not for the faint of heart
didn’t care much for higher education as what i was in school for was what i was already doing on the side. academics fell by the wayside while my i excelled on my ‘technical’ and vocational courses.
then after a string of high success in my late teens things just stopped dead in their tracks,
eventually, it led to a career change where i had to start over… when i told people that i was in my mid-20s learning to code or about a certain computer science thing that they had known from their childhood there was this feeling like was behind
eventually landed a position in a company with name recognition that i was barely motivated to advance in… there was nothing to look forward too
stuck in a rut by.. then i was in my 30s… ppl younger than me had started to surpass my level
during this time had let my other skills atrophy, - didn’t practice, didn’t songwrite, didn’t even set up my piano for years - the few times i did anything music related it was at a contention of ppl around me
‘The Waiting Place’ by dustin curtis is another post that also was reminded of
dr. seuss was a pseudonym while the real him would make it - after the 27th rejection, he believe that children's literature was a step-down. he never made a career as Thedor Seuss Geisel. ‘The Seven Lady Godivas’ tanked so badly that it would be 50 years before he would write another adult book
just like dr seuss, my pseudonym is known within certain circles and i'm somewhat successful
though i was not originally my intent to even start with one, it was just a way to get around certain… let’s just say… roadblocks, of being young.
now have to enter new places trying to replicate those successes. anything less to me is a failure
over the past few months i have had to be very explicit on what i’m working on, with my name on badges, in the credits, on the manuscript(s) - meeting people talking about projects and endeavors, talking up the shorts and feature(s) i have helped produce… their debuts at film festivals - treatments, specs, scripts...
but also i’m late… i’m older, i have not ‘paid my dues’
at times i feel that switching careers for the third (fourth?) time… in my mid-thirties… just feels like i’m late to the game keep chasing the high of success and possibly not able to achieve it
felt this way in the 2010s when moved from music to tech
i know there are stories of people that make career changes in their 50 or later and go on to achieve their dreams and success
i’m trying to make this happen… not resting on successes of the past… in different industries
i’m working on trying to figure out what this next step is…
so… why does it seem like i’m late?
