just had to make this! there is a lot of swearing, mentions of smoking, drinking, drugs and sex in the quotes below, just a heads up. I have slightly altered these so they are more universal and just a tad less aussie. (135 sentences all together)
“Show us your titties!”
“I’ll fucking give you head! I’ll give you a fucking broken head, you fuckwit!”
“Stop making so much bloody noise! I can’t hear the TV!”
“You’re fucked in the face, _______!”
“Wanna buy some dope?”
“The cops are coming!”
“I am the cop hunter!”
“What the fuck is he doing?”
“Alcohol. That’s why they say don’t drink and drive. It affects accuracy.”
“Ha! Look on that, mate! Not even a scratch, mate! And I did it ‘cause I hate authority, mate!”
“Your head looks like a fucking arse.”
“You might remember I did my fucking hip, too, which is why I can’t work, so I can’t get up and go and get the mail! Fuck! Thanks for caring!”
“The missus has got the shits again.”
“What’s going on with the pussy lately? ‘Cause you keep changing your Facey status, eh.”
“I’m fucking awesome. I still am. I always was and I still am…”
“My dick has never been happier. But my heart is, like, I don’t know, man.”
“Like a herpes on your heart?”
“Don’t talk to me about herpes, man.”
“Fucking hell! What, did your kids like try and burn your house down again?”
“Hey, nothing wrong with kids burning shit down. I burnt down me first school when I was four, mate.”
“Hey, you know what I don’t like, dickhead? When people like you putting your authority on me.”
“That kid looks nothing like me, mate! It’s got a head as big as a bloody pot plant!”
“Oh, one of my kids, they bit a teacher’s finger off at school. Yeah. How fucking awesome is that, eh?”
“Give us a beer, would you, darling? I’ve only got enough for half, but fill her up and I’ll give you the rest on cheque day, eh?”
“Feed your miserable children.”
“This is what we’re gonna do. OK, go voucher them chickens in the checkout. I’m gonna go steal some raffle tickets. Right, now we go into the pub and we tell the stooges that we’re gonna raffle off them chickens for charity, mate.”
“But what happened to all the money?”
“Yeah, no, we’ll just do a bashing for them, or maybe knock off some cars. - Then we’ll get you some cash, mate.”
