Tales of A Flower

[kabukiwuki]

'I'm not sharing a house with a man again': Weaponised incompetence ended Adelle's marriage

After three decades of living with weaponised incompetence, the final straw was coming home from holiday without a single picture of myself

[kabukiwuki]

Open Letter to the ANTI DIVORCE BILL

The absolute divorce bill has passed the third and final reading in Congress. Many religious people have expressed their disagreement with this, but they should not stop those who need it. Divorce is a legal matter, not a religious one. You are entitled to practice your religion and your faith, but do not deny this option to those who need it.

Divorce is a right that people in toxic and destructive marriages deserve. We need to stop the hypocrisy. How much effort has been made to stop concubinage and adultery? How effective have these measures been? Should we force families to suffer and remain in relationships that destroy them as individuals? Marriages outside Catholicism account for about 70% of married citizens. You are not 100% of the population. Who knows how many percent of these Catholic marriages are wanting divorce? Do your own stats within your congregations. Many people even choose to marry abroad where divorce is available.

We must respect the separation of religion and state. Is it really part of your religion to condemn those who got married and later found themselves suffering? Why prosecute people who are already trapped in toxic marriages? This isn’t just about emotional suffering; it also affects legal matters like assets and other aspects of life within the marriage.

Put yourself in the position of those who need divorce. Think of people you know who are helpless and trapped in failed marriages. Nobody is perfect. Yes, you have to work on a marriage, but after you’ve tried and given it your best, when will you say enough is enough? It’s very toxic. Think of those who need this option. Think of others, not just yourselves.

Consider those suffering from domestic violence, which includes physical, emotional, and financial abuse. These individuals need a way out to protect their safety and well-being. They deserve the chance to rebuild their lives free from fear and harm.

If you are happy in your marriage, this law doesn’t affect you. But don’t force those who are suffering to endure more just because your faith condemns mistakes made during marriage. If necessary, add a clause to exempt those within your religion from availing of divorce, but don’t limit the rights of all citizens based on your preferences.

Don’t judge those who need divorce; they’ve suffered enough. Living a lie is like living in hell. Mental health and emotional well-being are important. Let’s ensure that everyone has the opportunity to live a life free from unnecessary suffering.

Remember, divorce allows you to end a toxic relationship, but it doesn't fix your life. It gives people the freedom to start anew. And if, after the divorce, the couple decides to get married again, then let them. Let those who need to be free just be set free. In the end, the benefits of allowing divorce far outweigh the cons.

We respect your religious beliefs, so respect our rights. We accept we have failed; don't make it worse than it already is.

[kabukiwuki]

[kabukiwuki]

Well, funny you're the broken one But I'm the only one who needed saving 'Cause when you never see the light It's hard to know which one of us is caving

Rihanna

[kabukiwuki]

This is my safe haven

Today, I have been threatened... AGAIN.

I feel like my life is in danger everyday. Living with a monster who would always say bad things to you is a daunting task. I have been struggling the past few months; years actually!

The pandemic sure did not make things any easier. I have been dealing with anxiety and there’s been more things added to my fears. Afraid of what the future holds; afraid of dying, getting hurt, not seeing my kids, having no voice, having no one to  turn to.

Just a few minutes ago, I was accused of cheating, lying, everything. All to find a reason to hurl insulting words and threats... death threats. Saying he’ll make sure I go limp or return back home to my family in a coffin if he finds out I am cheating on him. Like WTF!!! He is the one who’s addicted to pornography. He’s the one who’s got a record of cheating, flirting & whatnot promiscuous and perverted. I have no interest in other men. Heck I have even lost my drive for sex because of him. He’s nasty as f*%*.

I want to call the cops so badly. Ask for help. Help to get me out of here. But that would affect the future of me and my family.

He always nags about the things he’s done and given me. Like I won’t have what I have if not for him. Are you serious? Coming from him? Bragging aside but I have always had what I have because my family has brought me up comfortably. The reason why it’s so hard for me to appreciate anything coming form him is because I know that he does what he does so he can tell me to my face again about the material things. These “gifts” and “kind gestures” are his receipts to say he’s already repaid me everything I’ve done for him when he was down in the drain.

Now that I have started picking myself up from falling down deep ever since I got with him, he starts dragging me down again.

Is he just plain stupid? I have never asked anything from him at all! Never have I asked him to repay everything that he lacked for me to raise my kids. Up until now, I have been doing everything for my kids.

Who sends money for their needs? Me

Who pays for Irie’s car? Me and my dad

Who pays for Irie’s tuition fee and miscellaneous? Me

Who pays for the power and internet here at home? Me

Who pays for the groceries? Me

Who pays for petrol for two cars? Me

Like nothing’s left for me because all these, I have taken responsibility of. Yet all he ever sees is his from time to time support that I had to beg of him when I fall short.

And he’s supposedly to save up money... But where’s that savings gone? To his never ending purchase of material things. Material things that will eventually loose its value over time. Is that all he’s wanting to brag to me?

I have come to the point to want to install CCTVs. For my protection.  Just for when the time comes that something happens and I won’t be able to tell anyone literally, there’s at least an audio or video recording that can speak for itself.

I want to elaborate. I want to say more. I want to share. And somehow, even if I know this is a safe haven for me, I am still scared. 

If anything, I have learnt to become more independent. I have learnt to focus on loving myself. I want to have faith in me. I know I have faith in God and that He will protect me from these adversaries. 

[kabukiwuki]

Ngarag Mommy

Had to follow up Colourette delivery. Turned out the rider thought noone's home 2 days ago and was too slumped to deliver yesterday. Decided to just have it picked up at JRS. RUSHING for the accomplished form. Confirming with kuya Rolly. Need to edit Print itinerary. Feed irie. Irie loves corn. Rush to fix stuff. Irie pooped in diaper. Buy meds for mommy, buy choco chips, pick up package at JRS, gas 500 at petron. Irie with ugong kids! Pizzahut delivery late! Should be free! Paid otherwise. Told us they'll deliver 1 pizza. Heavy traffic- north park dinner.

[kabukiwuki]

Malling

November 9, 2015.

It’s a rainy morning today. Yesterday, mommy invited us to have lunch at SM. We had lunch at Rairai Ken.

We brought the stroller and the baby carrier. All our bags are in the stroller and Irie was with me in the carrier. Iroi don’t usually cry whenever we go out but yesterday she was having a fit. While we were eating, she started crying; so I tried to offer her my boob. The problem is she just won’t latch. It was the first time she cried so loud in a public place. I was already so engorged and my shirt was already wet. Good thing Hanna was there. We took turns carrying Irie til everyone got finished eating. After eating, JR went to mommy at bingo to bring her food. I don’t know but daddy didn’t want to go around SM so I just went to the local drugstore Watsons and got me my multivitamins. I told daddy that I need to buy a book but he said that the bookstore is in the other side of the building. He said we just go home and he’ll drop me at the bookstore on the way home. I really wanted to buy something or window shop for my baby but since daddy wanted to go home, we left.

Since daddy told me that he’ll drop me at the bookstore, we went to another mall, Robinsons. Since we were already in another mall, I took the liberty to look for baby stuff. I got a book for my book exchange, bonnet for baby, breast milk storage bottles, and an infant training cup. I also made a transaction to by my classmate’s brand new breast milk pump. I made a deal to buy it at 550 pesos instead of 750 pesos.

I am so happy that I got a breastmilk pump. I didn’t know how convenient it is to have one. I used to just hand express. Hand expressing is time-consuming and a bit hard while breast milk pump is so easy that I got 5 oz in just a few minutes.

Today, my husband didn't go to work because my mom was not here when we woke up, and he did not want to leave us (Irie and I) alone. When mommy got back, she bought a highchair for baby Irie. She also bought a box of pizza. Moments later, JR arrived with Johan and Hannah. But they left right away after getting the car registered.

What a way to cap off the day. Dinner was Lapulapu, Asparagus & Bulalo. Pangmayaman! I had so much fun tonight. Me and mom just got back from massage and it's been ages since I last had one. We chose the combo 1, it's Swedish massage plus Thai foot massage for just 450 pesos. Mommy always goes there and she tagged me along with her tonight. I can't seem to remember how it feels to have a massage. And I am just so happy that I went with her tonight.

[dheysie]

Oh wow! Irie’s just so happy to receive another book!

It’s a teether cloth book! Love book exchange! Looking forward to receiving more books. :)

Do you want to receive books too? Book Lovers of any age can participate. As long as you’re excited to receive books. :) ask me how!

#365daysofirie #BabiesOfInstagram #6Months #clothbook #carters #bookexchange #booklover #bookworm

[dheysie]

Good morning!!! Pretty in Pink!

Mommy & daughter terno. I love waking up beside this pretty girl. Because cosleeping is love. 👶🏼❤️👶🏼

#365daysofirie #6Months #PrettyInPink #Pink #MommyDiary #Cosleeping #BabiesOfInstagram #EBF #BreastfeedingPinay

[dheysie]

Trick or treat!!! I want candies and chocolates please!!!

Where can we trick or treat?!?

#365daysofirie #halloween2015 #halloween #6months #yayairie #babiesofinstagram #costume

[dheysie]

I saw this Farlin nasal vacuum at our local department store so I tried it for the sake of curiosity. I’ve been warned before that this thing doesn’t do much but silly me, I did not heed to the warnings.

Back to the question: Does this thing work? Answer: NO! It really is useless. :(

#365daysofirie #doesthisthingwork #nasalvacuum #babyneedsph #babyneeds #mommydiary #babycolds #farlin

[dheysie]

Just to make sure she’s OK, we went to Irie’s pedia to have her checked. She’s had colds the past few days, and though improving, the mom in me can’t help but feel worried whenever little miss sniffles is having a hard time going to sleep at night.

She’s already developing cough but good thing we don’t have to resort to antibiotics just yet. Good that she’s breastfed. :)

She’ll be under observation til Saturday. Hope these 3 tandem work their magic on my little Irie.

#365daysofirie #6months #colds #medicine #cough #disudrin #solmux #alnix #pedia

[dheysie]

Need to wash the dishes but home alone with Irie? No problem with a Lenny and have her back carry. *rhymes*

This is just one of the occasions when baby wearing helps me heaps!!! Baby is comfy while I tend to the dishes.

Lenny is love!!! ❤️❤️❤️

#365DaysofIrie #5months #baby #babiesofinstagram #babywearing #babywearingph #lennylamb #lennyontheloose #mommydiary #chores #homemaker #babycarrier

[kabukiwuki]

Stuck In The Moment

October 19, 2015

To err is human. Error… Errands… Errand Errands Errands…

Today I’m running errands. I’m currently here at BPI Circumferential Antipolo to run one errand. Bank is currently offline and I’m seated here in front of a banker who I think has her hands full. The pile of paperwork is standing right in front of her and there’s more to come. I just wish I get done right away coz my baby’s waiting for me at home. Apparently, it takes so many paperworks before getting a release hold-out for my credit card.

So, finally! ✔️ bills paid at LBC ✔️ time deposit release hold-out done

Home with Irie at last.

Need to wash the dishes but home alone with Irie? No problem with a Lenny and have her back carry. *rhymes*

This is just one of the occasions when baby wearing helps me heaps!!! Baby is comfy while I tend to the dishes.

Lenny is love!!! ❤️❤️❤️ #365DaysofIrie #5months #baby #babiesofinstagram #babywearing #babywearingph #lennylamb #lennyontheloose #mommydiary #chores #homemaker

[dheysie]

[kabukiwuki]

One happy Sunday, my brother decided to pull his modules out and cook.

I haven't gone home for a couple of weeks already. This is another Sunday I'm spending with my family. When my mom asked my brother to prepare the marinade for barbecue, finally, my brother thought of preparing something from what he learned from his culinary classes. He chose these three dishes: Beef Stroganoff, Roast Beef & Bacon Asparagus.

As we hunt for the ingredients listed on his module, I was taken aback when I saw the prices. I didn't expect all those ingredients to be that expensive. Plus add the fact that the ingredients are so specific. I can't just get any oil or any mustard from the shelves. It has to be dijon mustard, peanut oil for the roast beef, and clarified butter oil for the stroganoff. Now I fully understand why people pay a fortune in culinary schools. It was fun shopping though. I kinda enjoyed running around the shelves of Shopwise while looking for the specific ingredients my brother needs for cooking.

As soon as we got home, we started preparing all the ingredients needed. I was designated by my brother as his sous chef. While he prepares the beef stroganoff, I was told to prepare the roast beef. I began massaging the beef tenderloin with dijon mustard, pepper & salt. In a pan with olive oil(in place of the peanut oil), I quickly cooked each side of the tenderloin until brown. We added paprika for added flavor and color. In place of an oven, I set the turbo at 280 C, and placed the tenderloin slab in the turbo for 15 minutes. After 15 minutes, I lowered the temperature at 180 C and left the beef until cooked. It was kinda hard to know when it's cooked coz we cannot see the inside. I think I cooked it rare. We continued cooking it at 180 C for another 10 minutes. When we sliced the beef, it was medium-well, and juicy in the inside. My brother prepared the sauce with the roast beef drippings, red wine, and other ingredients. 

As my brother prepares the sauce, I started preparing the asparagus. I left the asparagus in hot water then rolled three slices of asparagus in bacon. My brother was very specific to use olive oil with butter in sauteing the onion & beef asparagus. Those onions were chopped into fine bits for me to use. I fried the bacon asparagus and voila! A master piece!

As mentioned earlier, my brother prepared the beef stroganoff & sauce for the roast beef. I dunno how he did it but it's good! :D One thing failed though; my brother microwaved the roast beef which he shouldn't have done. It kinda made the beef tangy. Roast beefs should only be sliced before eating it. Also, we kinda forgot my dad doesn't eat beef. But all these dishes were good!

I'm so looking forward to going home on Sundays for another cooking session with my brother. :D

BON APETITE! 

[dheysie]

[kabukiwuki]

After a long day's work... Stamina Ramen + Katsudon + Chickendon hehe

When the clock struck 6, I rushed to my room, packed all my laundry in a bag, jumped right away in my car, and drove as fast as I could.

Yes! I'm a foodie!

When I got an SMS from Hannah & JR, I did not even think twice. Dinner invites are always a yes! I wasn't supposed to go home yet. Usually, I go home on Sunday mornings especially now that my left headlight is busted.

Nothing beats a full Japanese meal after a week of nothing but stress & exhaustion. :) Yum yum yum Tamagoya! 

[kabukiwuki]

If there's something missing in this photo, it's because something or someone is. IT'S ME!!!

We planned this dinner just a week ago and it's surprising that we got to set a date that everyone agreed on. But low & behold. I already got prepared to leave for the dinner but apparently, I'm the one who can't. I had to go with my family to Subic. :(

But what can I do? I'm now Subic-bound. 

Gotta hit the beach tom. though :)