SYNOPSIS: after your fall from grace last semester, you didn’t think you’d find yourself back on campus, but here you are. With Beomgyu’s sudden interest in you and the annual song writing competition being held again hopes of having a quiet semester are low.
PAIRINGS : beomgyu x f!reader (slight yeonjun x reader)
GENRE: music students au, friends to not friends to ???, angst, hurt, comfort, romance.
WARNINGS: swearing, angst, smut (mdni), yeonjun’s an asshole in this (i’m so sorry to the moawajjunies out there), bad jokes, featuring all other members.
WORD COUNT: 9.6k (lolz i tried my level best for it not to hit 10k)
A/N : it’s finally here 😭 this has been my longest fic so far and i really tried hard on this one. i don’t know much about music school so there might be a lot of inaccuracies here so bear with me. i hope y’all enjoy this one and thank you for waiting 🤍
You stood outside the campus building frowning at it. You had promised yourself you wouldn’t be coming back for the second semester after everything that had happened but here you were.
“Are you coming in or what?” Taehyun asks you.
“I hate this.” You muttered walking inside.
“You’ll survive” he tells you wrapping an arm around your shoulder.
-.-
The classes were nearing its end when you felt a tap on your shoulder. You turned around and saw Beomgyu smile at you.
“What’s up?” you whispered.
“Nothing. Nice to know that you’re back” he told you still smiling.
You gave him a nod and turned back around. Of course everyone had to know about what happened. Gossip spread like wild fire around campus and you were no exception. But you knew, it’d die down soon once they had someone else’s misery to latch on to. You didn’t expect THE Choi Beomgyu to talk to you about it though.
The bell rang and your professor gave the list of additional readings you had to do by the next class and you quickly jotted them down. You didn’t want to stick around and answer more of Beomgyu’s or anyone else’s questions. You practically leapt out of the classroom and was hurrying outside when you saw Taehyun at the doors. You slowed down to a walk.
“How did it go?” he asked you.
“It was alright. A little weird though” you told him.
You both stepped outside the building heading towards the cafeteria.
“Weird how?” Taehyun asked you.
“Hmm I don’t know. Beomgyu told me it’s nice to have me back” you said shrugging your shoulders.
“Wha- wow. y/n you’re famous now” he told you chuckling. You pushed him.
“Shut up. He is probably messing around. You know him.” You told Taehyun rolling your eyes.
Beomgyu was THE most popular guy in campus. With his long hair and coffee brown eyes, girls and guys practically drooled over him. But that wasn’t always how it was. You two had kind of been friends when college started, clinging on to each other since you had sat together on the first day of class. But within a few weeks it was clear that people had taken a liking to Beomgyu. Nobody could escape his charm and soon you guys drifted off. You were never an outgoing person in the first place and he clearly loved the attention. Besides when the other thing happened you didn’t have enough time to hang out with him anyways. And now you were back in the trenches and he still continued to be on top.
-.-
“Did you see the flyers?” Taehyun asked you walking into your dorm.
“How could I not? They are everywhere” you told him sighing and laying back down on the sofa.
“So? Are you participating?” Taehyun asked you with his wide eyes. You knew that look. It’s the one he gave whenever he wanted to get something done. You quickly looked away.
“Hell no. You know what went down better than anyone else Tae” you said looking up at the ceiling.
Taehyun leaned over you so that you had to look at him. “Come on. It’s over now. You have to do this. Otherwise people will believe it to be true” he told you.
You closed your eyes. The annual songwriting competition was happening again. Last time you had entered and very nearly won. But then the Yeonjun fiasco happened and you had nearly dropped out of college. You were sure you couldn’t go through that shit again.
“No, Tae I won’t be participating” you told him firmly.
Taehyun sighed. This was not over but he knew pushing you right now wouldn’t work. He needed a bigger plan.
“I know that look” you told him frowning.
“What look?” He asked you with wide eyes.
“You are scheming” you muttered.
Taehyun laughed. “Get up, let’s grab something to eat before the game”
Oh that’s right. Tonight was the fucking football game. “Fuck no. I’m not coming”
“God Y/N stop being a drag and come. It might be fun. Also Kai is busy today and I really wanna watch the game” he told you pulling you up.
“Remind me again, why are we friends?” You asked him as he pushed you into your room to change.
“Because without me you might die alone and without me life is just an empty shell of itself” he told you picking out an outfit for you.
You pushed him away from your closet.
“Alright, alright but you owe me a drink. Now get out, so I can change” you grumbled at him.
He threw you finger hearts and a wink and you had to fight off your laughter.
-.-
If you had a little less pride you’d have admitted that the game was fun. Your department’s team sucked though. But what more can you expect from the music department who rarely stepped out of their studios.
Beomgyu was sitting a couple of aisles away from you with Soobin and a few others. He had nodded at you when you made eye contact earlier and you had given him a wave earning you quick once over from Soobin.
A couple of people sniggered when you walked past them and your head hung low. Taehyun flipped them off and dragged you to your seats and here you were now.
“Maybe I should’ve gone for the tryouts because this is not it” he groaned.
You giggled. “Tae, I begged you to go for the tryouts and you told me you’d rather die than be a jock”
“You should’ve forced me more” he grumbled.
“Nuh-uh” you said leaning your head onto his shoulder.
-.-
After recording a historical defeat of 5-1, the game was over. The drama department was having the time of their lives and your department stood out there defeated.
Taehyun and you were waiting for the crowd to dissipate a bit before heading out, when you noticed a familiar mop of bright orange hair. Your insides twisted into itself and you grabbed Taehyun’s arm in alarm. Taehyun looked at you with concern but his eyes hardened when he saw Yeonjun making his way towards you.
“Tae get me out of here” you pleaded.
“Wait-“ he was trying to tell you something when Yeonjun cut over him.
“Y/N, I need to talk to you, I swear it won’t take more than 5 minutes” Yeonjun stood in front of Taehyun looking over his shoulder to see you. If it weren’t for how angry and scared you were you would’ve laughed at the ridiculousness of the situation.
“Please, leave me alone” you whispered at him.
People had noticed you and Yeonjun and were starting to stare at the three of you. Taehyun refused to move away from you and was basically having a stare down with Yeonjun.
“So that’s it huh? After everything you are just going to cut me out like that?” Yeonjun sneered at you. “You already took away my scholarship and now you can’t even face me properly without having your boyfriend in the middle of this?” he was practically shouting at you.
More people had gathered. You could feel your heart in your throat and anxiety completely shut you down. Your body was shaking and tears threatened to spill from your eyes. “No.. I- Please” you choked out.
“You whore” Yeonjun tried pushing Taehyun out of the way and that’s when the first punch landed on him. People were shouting and trying to pry apart the boys. You were tugging on Taehyun’s shoulder as he shouted obscenities at Yeonjun.
“Tae please” you tried your best to force them apart. From your view point Beomgyu was trying to pull Yeonjun away. Soobin stepped in between them keeping them apart. You dragged Taehyun out of the stands.
“Stay the fuck away from her” Taehyun shouted back at Yeonjun. His lips were bleeding and you could feel him shaking.
Yeonjun was shouting back at you two but his voice was muffled. You noticed Beomgyu from behind Yeonjun signalling you to get out.
-.-
“I’m going to kill him” Taehyun was still pacing around in your dorm.
You had applied medicine to some of his cuts and scratches. He looked a little funny covered in yellow ointment and having a shinchan plaster on his chin but you knew better than to laugh at him right now. You were still feeling a little shaky inside.
“Please” you murmured holding your head in your hands.
“No, how dare he? How dare he come up to you and blame you for everything?” Taehyun sat down next to you in a huff.
“It doesn’t matter Tae” your voice was shaky “I’m the reason he lost his scholarship after all” you managed to choke out before completely breaking down.
“Shh Y/N” Taehyun wrapped an arm around you pulling you onto him. “You did nothing wrong. He deserved every bit of it” he murmured into your hair.
You cried onto his chest, memories from the past threatening to pull you back.
-.-
You met Yeonjun over a year ago. You had stayed back in the studio to work on your music composition and he had walked in. He looked so cool in his leather jacket and loose pants.
“Hi” he called out when he saw you sitting alone in the room.
“Hi” you kind of did a half wave before dropping your hand back in your lap. You could feel the anxiety tightening its grip on your heart threatening you to double over. Keep your cool, you reminded yourself.
“I haven’t seen you before, are you a first year?” Yeonjun was walking up to you.
You nodded your head and gave him a smile.
“I’m Yeonjun by the way, I’m doing my third sem right now” he said holding out his hand.
“Y/N” you said loosely holding his hand and giving it a light shake.
“What are you working on?” He asked you sitting down next to you on your bench.
“Just composition. I suck at it” you muttered rolling your eyes. You were great at songwriting but composition stumped you. Beomgyu usually helped you out but he was hanging out with his other friends and you didn’t want to be a drag around him. Taehyun was ass at composition too, but being a sem ahead of you his was already done, leaving you to struggle with it alone.
“Let me have a look at it” Yeonjun took the piece of paper from your hands, scanning the contents and you sneaked another look at him. Up close he looked even more handsome with two piercings on each ear and his lips had a pouty look to them. He glanced back at you and you quickly looked away.
“This is not that hard, I’ll help you with it” he told you. He was smiling at you and you couldn’t help but smile back at him. He cleared all the doubts you had promising you to help you out whenever you needed his help and you ended up exchanging numbers.
That’s how you two had hit it off. Yeonjun needed your help when it came to lyrics and you needed his in composition. He was the coolest person in your eyes back then. Taehyun had been iffy about him back then and you had not heeded his warnings choosing to ignore the red flags. Yeonjun would constantly pull you away from Taehyun and your other friends and you both would end up in your studio mainly working on music. But for you it seemed more like dates with how close you’d be sitting and the way he would touch and talk to you. Stupid, stupid girl.
You regretted it now. The annual songwriting competition, trusting him, avoiding your friends. You regretted every bit of it. It was still too embarrassing to think off. How you convinced yourself he liked you back and how you had just handed over your lyrics trusting him enough to give you the credits for it. The asshole entered it as his own and performed it live. He nearly got away with it too, if it weren’t for Taehyun noticing the similarities between your verses and his. You had notified the board and shown them the notes on your phone and the drafts you had saved up as proof. He was eliminated immediately and the board had offered you a consolation prize which you turned down. You hadn’t known it would take away his scholarship too.
A lot of people still refused to believe you though, most of them your seniors choosing Yeonjuns side. It had been a lot of hate towards you which was why you wanted to drop out of college all together. Well, it’s all in the past now. If it weren’t for Taehyun you wouldn’t have come back. He was your rock and you were eternally grateful for him.
-.-
“It’s kind of funny, how he called Taehyun your boyfriend” Beomgyu told you. “Like that was the lamest bit out of everything that came out of his mouth”
You didn’t know what was up with Beomgyu. It seemed like the boy was solely interested in you. He had sat down next to you in class after ages. You had raised your eyebrows at him and he shrugged his shoulders at you giving you a playful smile.
“How do you know he is not my boyfriend?” you asked Beomgyu curiously.
“Yah, you look more like siblings than anything else” he huffed out
“Are you though ?” He asked you with wide eyes.
“Ugh. No” you told him. He was the closest thing you had to a brother.
The bell rang and you started collecting your things, Beomgyu was shuffling beside you. “See you aro-“ you started when he cut you off.
“There is a party happening tonight at Soobin’s place, do you wanna come?” Beomgyu asked you with a smile.
You frowned. “Why?” you questioned.
“What do you mean, why? Why not? Bring Taehyun too” Beomgyu was still smiling at you.
“No- I mean, sure but why are you asking me to?” you were still frowning at him.
“Because maybe I want to be friends with you?” He told you picking up his backpack.
“But-“ you started again.
“Be there Y/N” he said walking out of class.
You sighed.
-.-
It was not like you didn’t go to parties, you did. Mostly to accompany Taehyun. You just didn’t like the crowd and the drinking. And after last semester you had barely gone to any event on campus. Taehyun didn’t force you to, he knew you needed your time and usually he went with Kai.
You opened the door to find Taehyun waiting outside. He was wearing a dark shirt with black jeans and he looked good. “Ready?” He asked you smiling.
“Uh-huh” you told him. “You look good” you told him.
“You look cute” he said walking up to the elevator. You had worn a skirt and a spaghetti strapped top with a black crocheted pullover. You grinned at Taehyun. His cuts were healing.
“Kai loves the shinchan bandaid” Taehyun told you. You laughed. “I knew he would”
-.-
Soobin’s party was actually nice. You had walked in expecting it to be loud and swarming with people, but there were only a couple of others. Most of them from your year too. Some were swaying to the music others were sitting around chatting with one another. Soobin had greeted you at the front door with “Beomgyu told me you guys would come”.
You saw Kai walking over to you and felt Taehyun fidget behind you. Kai was the closest person to Taehyun after you and you sometimes wondered what went on between them but you never asked. Knowing Taehyun, he would tell you in his own time.
“It’s nice to see you again Y/N” Kai told you giving you a hug. “You too” you said patting his back.
“I’ll be right back, you guys hang out” you told him and walked further into the house.
“Call me if you need anything” Taehyun called out from behind you and you waved him off.
Beomgyu was just getting outside a room when you were walked up to him. “Hi” he grinned at you.
“Hi” you said. Well you found him, now what?
“Were you looking for me?” He asked you and you nodded.
“Hmm… wanna go someplace quieter?” He asked you stepping away from the door.
“Quieter than this?” You questioned him fighting back laughter.
“Uh-huh, come with me” he told you leading you deeper into the house.
“Did you get anything to drink?” Beomgyu asked without turning his head.
“Nope” you had reached the kitchen.
“I’ll fix you up something” he told you walking over to the counter. You could see stacks of cups and drinks, “No- um I don’t drink, I’ll just have soda or something” you said hopping onto the empty space.
“Alright” he said pouring something into a cup and handing it over to you. He stood in front of you holding his own cup. You took a sip, Cola.
“Why am I here?” You asked him. You didn’t want to play anymore games.
“I told you. I want to be friends with you” Beomgyu told you putting his cup down and coming closer to you.
You raised an eyebrow at him. “We are friends.”
“Better friends?” He was looking down at you and you had to look away, flustered by his proximity.
“Okay…” you whispered.
“Where’s Taehyun? Or did he not come?” Beomgyu asked you.
“Oh he is with Kai” you leaned back so that your back rested against the wall.
“I see… Uhh Y/N, are you participating in the competition this year?” He asked you placing a hand on your knee.
You looked at his hand and then looked up at him, “No”.
“Why not? Is it because of what happened last time?” Beomgyu asked you trying to look into your eyes.
You nodded your head. Anxiety had started bubbling up in your chest.
“Hmm… why don’t you enter with me?” He asked you and you looked up at him sharply.
So that was it. That’s why he wanted you to come over.
“Is that why you asked me to come here?” You asked him quietly moving his hand away from your knee.
“What? No. Well, maybe. I thought we could do something together this time. You are great at songwriting Y/N…” he trailed off when he saw the look in your eyes.
“Fuck off” you told him hoping off the counter. You were about to walk away when he grabbed hold of your arm. “Let go” you said trying to shake him off.
“Wait- Y/N, listen to me” Beomgy grabbed your arm again.
“WHAT? WHAT IS IT?” You shouted at him. “I’m not some product to be used again Beomgyu. I’m sick of people pretending to be my friends and then taking whatever they want from me” you shook his hand off tears were sprouting from your eyes and you rushed outside. You kicked a can lying on the ground and sat down on the curb holding your face in your hands. Of course. You hated yourself for how stupid you had been to trust someone else. People only wanted to use you. They didn’t care about you.
You wiped your tears away angrily about to call Taehyun to let him know you were going back home. Someone was walking up to you. Beomgyu.
“Stay away from me” you muttered at him trying to find Taehyun’s contact.
“Fuck Y/N” Beomgyu said grabbing your phone out of your hands. “Just listen to me, for once”
“If it’s about the competition, I don’t want to” you said trying to get your phone back. Beomgyu sat down next to you.
“Alright. I won’t bring it up again. I’m sorry” he said handing over your phone. You looked at him in confusion. This was not how things usually went.
“It’s just, I wanted to do this thing with you and you were perfect for it- but never mind. I’m sorry I shouldn’t have forced you like that” he said looking at you. You looked down on your hands not knowing what to tell him.
“Please? It’s not the only reason I wanted you to come over you know?” He asked you bending over his knees to look at your face.
You looked at him. “Then?”
“I missed having you around” he told you and you snorted.
“That’s very believable”
“What? It’s true” he told you pulling your hair so that you’d look at him again. “I missed talking to you and after what happened I regretted letting you drift away like that” he told you.
You looked into his eyes. He seemed sincere enough. “So, Taehyun didn’t convince you to do this?” you asked him.
“He might’ve mentioned it-but wait, I understand why you don’t want to now.. I’m really sorry” he told you.
Your stomach chose that moment to let out a loud rumble. Your eyes widened and Beomgyu started laughing next to you.
“Hungry huh?” He asked you getting up and offering you his hand. You took it getting up and dusting yourself off. “Starving” you replied.
“I know just the place” he told you giving your hand a squeeze. “Friends?” He asked you with a smile.
“Ugh. Friends” you said letting go off his hand and following him to his car.
-.-
Beomgyu couldn’t help but smile at your sleeping form. You guys had been studying for the last two hours and sometime along the way you had fallen asleep. He pushed away the strand of hair covering your face. Even asleep your eyebrows were knitted into a frown.
It felt like how you two had started off. Beomgyu didn’t mean for you two to drift apart but when he noticed how close you had gotten with Yeonjun, he decided to stay away from you. Deep down he knew it had something to do with jealousy but he pushed that thought away every time it popped up.
When Taehyun had approached him with the plan of getting you back on to the competition, Beomgyu had been a little hesitant. But after the incident at the football game and the way you seemed to shrink away from people made him rethink. He wanted you to show everyone what you were capable of instead of hanging your head low and avoiding everyone.
Beomgyu laid his head on the table watching your sleeping face a melody floating around in his head, he wondered how he would convince you to do this. Soon enough he too drifted off into dreamland.
-.-
Your phone vibrating woke you up. Getting up groggily it took you a few seconds to realise you had fallen asleep in the library. Looking sideways you found Beomgyu napping peacefully next to you.
Taehyun was calling you. “Hello” you whispered into your phone, afraid of waking up Beomgyu.
“Where are you? Why are you being so quiet?” Taehyun asked you.
“I’m at the library. Fell asleep while studying” you continued whispering.
“Ohh do you need me to pick you up? It’s pretty late” Taehyun asked, you could hear Kai laughing in the background.
“No Tae, it’s fine. I’m with Beomgyu. I’ll text you when I reach home” you told him.
“With Beomgyu? Wah you two really have hit it off haven’t you?” Taehyun giggled.
“Shut up” you muttered
“Text me” he tells you before hanging up.
You placed the phone back onto the desk shifting your attention to Beomgyu. He really was so handsome. You wanted to run your hand through his fluffy hair but fought back your urge.
“How long were you planning on staring at me?” Beomgyu asked cracking an eye open and looking at you.
You nearly jumped from your seat. “Fuckk Beomgyu, why didn’t you get up if you were awake?” You hissed at him trying to hide your embarrassment at being caught staring at him.
Beomgyu grinned at you, amused at your flustered reaction. “I’ll drop you home” he told you.
“Nah it’s fine, I can walk home by myself” you told him.
“Uhuh, no way. Taehyun would kill me if he comes to know I let you walk home alone” he told you getting up and stretching.
Let you? “Let me? I don’t need your permission to walk back to my house” you told him indignantly, grabbing your stuff and shoving them into your bag.
“I’m sorry I didn’t mean it like that. But, I’ll drop you home. Please let me have this honour princess” he held a hand to his chest and bowed his head to you.
“Oh fuck off” you told him giving him a push and he caught your hand. You looked at him with surprise. “Aren’t you hungry?” Beomgyu asked still holding your hand.
“Why are you always trying to feed me?” You asked him. His hand was warm and soft.
“You didn’t answer the question” he said tugging you closer.
“Yeah, a bit” you told him feeling shy for some reason.
Beomgyu almost cooed at your reaction. You liked to act all tough and mean but in reality he could see you were a really sensitive and shy person. “Wanna come over to my place?” He asked you.
You looked at him quickly. “It’s late, your roommates would mind” You didn’t know what else to say. He probably didn’t think too much before asking you.
“Who? Soobin? No way. I’m pretty sure he is still up gaming” Beomgyu laughed out.
“Still. It would be awkward” you told him looking down at your feet.
“Oh come on. I make really good ramyeon you know?” Beomgyu was wiggling his eyebrows at you and you laughed. “Fine” you told him trying to take back your hand but he held it tighter still.
“Thank God, I’m ready to drop” he told you grabbing his backpack and leading you out of the library, the heat from his hand warming yours as he tugged you along.
-.-
“I thought you made really good ramyeon ?” you asked Beomgyu.
“Yes, but Soobin makes even better ramyeon” he told you solemnly.
You fought back your laughter. Soobin stood grumpily in the kitchen. Beomgyu had manipulated him into cooking you guys dinner and you felt sorry for him. You walked over to Soobin to see his progress.
“Do you need any help?” you asked him nudging his arm. “I didn’t know Beomgyu would make you cook” you told him apologetically
“No, it’s fine Y/N, it’s almost done. Besides Beomgyu is a terrible chef. You probably won’t come back here again if he cooked for you” Soobin told you.
“YAH! I can hear you” Beomgyu shouted from the table.
You laughed. Soobin grinned down at you. “It’s great that you are friends again” Soobin told you quiet enough that Beomgyu wouldn’t hear. “He wouldn’t stop yapping about you all of last semester” he whispered so that Beomgyu wouldn’t hear.
“Yeah. It’s nice” you told Soobin, glancing back at Beomgyu who sat with his feet on the table scrolling through his phone. You didn’t know Beomgyu cared about you that much.
“It’s done” Soobin told you turning off the stove, “Can you help me carry the bowls?”
“Yes, of course” you grabbed the bowls and chopsticks as Soobin placed the food on the table.
You knocked Beomgyu’s feet off the table before putting down the dishes, ignoring his indignant shouts.
-.-
It was the happiest you had been in recent times. You wished Taehyun were here with you. You had texted him to let him know that you were with Beomgyu and he had texted back with a 🫣 emoji which you promptly ignored.
“Did you know, after watching 25-21 Beomgyu cried for two days?” Soobin asked you.
“Really?” You looked at Beomgyu with wide eyes.
“Shut up. I’m still mad over the fact that they didn’t end up together” Beomgyu muttered not looking up at you.
“Aww, were you really that sad?” You cooed at him, patting his head and Beomgyu knocked your hand away.
“Better than crying over losing 7 games in a row” he told you looking at Soobin with narrowed eyes.
“7 games in a row??? Wahh and you told me you were a pro-gamer” you asked Soobin in mock surprise. Soobin’s smile quickly dropped, “Yah, yah, yah I was not trying too hard that day” he told you grumpily.
“Sure, whatever helps you sleep better” Beomgyu grinned at him and Soobin flipped him off.
“Alright I’ll better get going then” it was nearing eleven and you felt exhausted.
Beomgyu got up too. “I’ll come back after dropping her home” he told Soobin who gave him a nod. You were too exhausted to fight with Beomgyu so you just went along with him.
The walk back home was silent. Beomgyu had insisted on carrying your backpack for you despite your protests, but he was being too quiet.
“Are you still mad?” You asked him gingerly.
“No. Why would I be mad?” He asked you still not looking at you.
“I cried for a week after watching that drama” you told him quietly.
“Wait- really?” He asked finally looking at you.
“Yeah. I don’t like sad endings” you told him.
“Me too. I get too invested in the storyline. I want only good things to happen to the main character” Beomgyu told you.
“I know right. I can’t handle open endings either were we get to decide what happens” you told him excitedly. Taehyun never understood this. He rarely cried over t.v shows and mostly ended up comforting you through it.
“You get it” Beomgyu told you nudging you gently.
Walking along you freeze in your steps, not quite able to believe the sight in front of you. Yeonjun stood outside your dorm building. Beomgyu comes to a stop next to you looking at you in confusion before following your line of sight and seeing Yeonjun.
“Well, well, well new guy already huh?” Yeonjun tells you walking up to you. You force yourself not to cringe away from him.
Beomgyu stiffens up beside you and he is about to say something when you take hold of his hands. He looks at you and you gently shake your head before stepping in front of him.
“What do you want?” You ask Yeonjun quietly. You were sick of feeling afraid and embarrassed because of him.
“I just need to talk to you” he tells you, giving Beomgyu a glance.
“Then talk” Beomgyu tells him.
“I need to talk to you alone” Yeonjun emphasises.
“No. You can talk to me now” you tell him.
“I’m entering the competition again this year” he tells you with a smug look on his face.
You feel like you’ve been punched in the gut. He is entering again ?? The board. How could they? Despite everything he had done how could they just let him enter.
“No” you whisper.
“Yes. I am. A few members of the board are still on my side” Yeonjun smirks at you.
You feel rage bubbling up in your chest and you want to break him. Wipe off that stupid smirk from his face and hurt him just as much as he hurt you. You palms curl up ready to hit him when you feel Beomgyu gently taking hold of your hand. Bringing you back to reality.
You realise this is what Yeonjun needs. For you to react and then break. You see his eyes shift down to your hands and he lets out a quiet laugh.
“Good luck” you tell him, making your voice as emotionless as you can. That gets his attention. Yeonjun looks at you in confusion.
“What?” He asks you. You can tell he is bothered and you smile inwardly.
“Good luck. I’m sure you can make it without my help Yeonjun, I hope it works out for you” you tell him patiently.
The rage and discomfort in his eyes is enough to make up for everything he put you through.
“See you around” Beomgyu tells him before walking you into the building.
Once inside you finally let the rage take over you.
Beomgyu softly takes hold of your hands and you knock him away. “How dare he?” You whispered. You wanted to scream. You stepped away from Beomgyu and he held his hands up in peace, trying to catch your eyes again.
Beomgyu could see the thoughts raising through your head and he felt your anger too. The asshole. Fuck the board, he thought to himself. The way you carried yourself in front of Yeonjun made him feel proud of you. He had been so close to saying “That’s my girl” when you did your bit but held back, knowing you would round house kick him if he ever does something like that.
“It’s okay” he told you gently.
Your eyes focused back on him. “No. It’s fucking not okay” You felt incredibly sad now. People couldn’t just get away with things like this. He should’ve been banned from the competition. You swayed a bit and Beomgyu caught you immediately. Wrapping you up in his arms.
“I’m not going to let him win” you told him fiercely. Beomgyu leaned away from you to look down at you. Then his eyes widened, realisation dawning on him.
“Wait- is this what I think it is?” He asked. You could see him trying to fight back his smile.
“Yes” you muttered.
“Yay” Beomgyu’s small smile broke into a wide grin and he hugged you again.
The competition was on.
-.-
“I bring food” Taehyun told you as he walked into your studio. Your eyes take a while to focus on him, blurry from spending too much time staring into your computer screen.
Beomgyu was passed out on the chair next to you and you bring up a finger to your lips signalling Taehyun to be quiet and leading him outside your studio.
You smile at him after closing the door. “Thank you Tae” you say taking the packages from his hands.
“Did you eat anything at all today?” Taehyun asks you. You have been working non-stop this whole week on your song during evenings and whenever you had free time, Beomgyu worked along with you. It was almost done but it had taken everything in you.
“Uh- Beomgyu brought me a cake I think- or was that yesterday?” You tell him, trying to rack your memories about when your last meal had been. “But i have been eating” you say quickly noticing Taehyun’s change in expression. Beomgyu made sure you ate dinner with him every day which you were grateful for, making you miss one less meal.
“It’s great that you decided to do this Y/N, but I don’t want you to kill yourself in the process” he tells you concern written all over his face.
“I won’t” you reassure him. “How’s Kai?”
“Oh he’s alright” Taehyun tells you scratching his head and you take note of the light pink dusting his cheeks. You smile to yourself.
“How are you Tae?” You ask him.
“Yah you talk to me like we didn’t just hang out yesterday night at your dorm” he tells you indignantly.
“Well, me passing out before I even got a chance of talking to you doesn’t count as hanging out” you tell him, “For which I’m really sorry too” you add.
“It’s alright, I’m doing okay so don’t worry about me just focus on your work, Okay?” He asks you giving your head a pat.
You give him a quick hug, one of the packages hits his back and he let’s out a quiet ‘ow’ making you both laugh.
“I’ll get going then, say my hi to Beomgyu” Taehyun tells you before walking away.
“Bye” you call out, before stepping back into your studio again.
It’s a mess, with lyric sheets and notebooks and Beomgyu’s giant guitar case all lying haphazardly around the room, but it’s the kind of mess you enjoy. You place the food on the table, shoving away the notebooks and you look over at Beomgyu, your heart softening immediately.
Beomgyu must’ve been as tired as you are but he rarely showed it. Whenever you felt like giving up, he would take over and work on the tricky parts. You knew he would make a great producer someday. The melody he wrote for your song was so beautiful, that tears sprung to your eyes when you first heard it. You didn’t need words to communicate with him while working, both of you understanding each other perfectly and working so well with each other that it sometimes felt like he was just another part of your being.
“Hey, wake up. Taehyun bought us food” you gently shake Beomgyu’s shoulder and he wakes up slowly, looking at you and then smiling.
“Did I sleep for too long?” He asks before getting up and stretching out his arms over his head, the tshirt riding up and revealing his lower stomach to you and you look away.
“No- maybe half an hour?” You tell him moving to open the packages.
Beomgyu helps you set the table(more like opening the packages and arranging the spoons). He brings over your chairs and you both sit down.
“Taehyun is a God sent” he tells you before diving into his food.
You only nod your head before stuffing yourself up too. “Is why he is my favourite” you tell him with your mouth full.
“I thought I was your favourite” Beomgyu tells you pouting.
“Ha- you thought wrong” you tell him trying to open the bottle of cola before Beomgyu takes it from your hands and opens it up in no time.
“Who is your favourite again?” He asks you smiling.
“Taehyun” you reply without missing a beat.
“Oh- fuck off”
-.-
It was almost ten at night by the time you stepped out of your studio. The song was done and you just needed to record your adlibs. Oh and decide on the title. Beomgyu and you kept having disagreements (to be read as Beomgyu looking over fondly at you while you argued your case) about having an English title or a Korean one.
“Hey, wanna get ice cream?” Beomgyu asked you once you stepped outside the building.
“This late?” you questioned.
“I know just the place” he told you grabbing hold of your hand.
“Of course you do” you sighed. Beomgyu was the touchiest person you knew. It had taken you a while to get used to him taking hold of your hand (which was always) or hugging you whenever he felt like he wanted to. You refused to let your heart flutter at those touches and would just stand there receiving his affection.
-.-
“You are not getting mint choco. Not on my watch” Beomgyu stomped his foot down.
“You are just a hater, let me eat what I love” you tell him. The girl at the counter looked at the pair of you.
“I’m sorry, she is just out of her mind. We’ll have a cotton candy and a choco-malt” Beomgyu tells the girl.
“It’s alright, I get couples arguing over their choice of ice cream all the time” the girl grinned at you.
“We-“ you began, only to be cut off with, “Really? You must be tired of it by now” Beomgyu’s smiling at her and taking the ice cream from her hands.
You looked at him curiously and he shrugged his shoulders at you signalling you to go along with it. You smiled at the girl again before paying her and walking over to your booth.
“Why didn’t you tell her we are not together?” you asked Beomgyu while he handed over your ice cream to you.
“It’s not a big deal” he said shrugging his shoulders and pulling you down next to the stool by his side.
“Of course it is a big deal” you told him looking at him. Beomgyu avoided your gaze focusing on his ice cream instead. You nudged his knee with your own.
“It’s not… I’m pretty sure you’ve done that before with Taehyun or something” he murmured still not looking at you.
“Uhh”
“Haven’t you?” He pressed shifting his eyes to you finally.
“Um.. we sometimes do it for valentines. To get free food” you told him looking down at your lap. “But that’s different. It’s Taehyun” not you, you thought to yourself silently.
“Different how?” Beomgyu asked you before licking his ice cream and looking at you like he already knew the answer.
“Nothing” you told him licking your ice cream and looking over at him.
“You’ve got ice cream on your chin” you inform him.
“Where” he said rubbing it and completely missing the mark. You wiped your hand on his chin and sucked it off your fingers not noticing Beomgyu’s eyes on you at the action.
Beomgyu felt like butterflies had irrupted in his chest. How could you have this effect on him and pretend like nothing happened?
You looked up to see Beomgyu staring at you intensely, “What is it?” You asked him.
“Y/N, you can’t do shit like that and expect me to act like nothing happened” Beomgyu tells you.
“Huh?” you ask not knowing what you did.
He pulls your stool closer to him and you grab his arm to balance yourself. Swiping his thumb across your lips, he looks at you before sucking his thumb. Your eyes widen realising immediately what you had done. You try to keep your cool but you could tell you were blushing.
“Well it’s not like you don’t do shit like that to me either” you muttered.
“Oh really and what have I done that got you so flustered up princess” he asks you grinning at you.
You narrow your eyes at him, “I’m not your princess and you know what you’ve done Choi”
Beomgyu smirks at you and you feel the competitive spirit in you rise. You place a hand on his thigh and pull his shirt to bring him closer to you. You lean into him, before taking a lick of his ice cream and leaning back just as quickly removing your hands immediately.
Beomgyu stares at you and you could tell he is bothered by the way his face is flushed and his breath hitching up, eyes basically boring into yours as you innocently go back to eating your ice cream.
“Who is the flustered one now Choi?” You smirk at him and something in Beomgyu snaps. Beomgyu takes hold of your chin making you look at him and he leans down closer to you.
“Can I kiss you?” He asks you and your brain malfunctions. You look into his eyes and then you nod your head making him tsk. “Words princess”
“Yes” you whisper and Beomgyu closes the gap between you immediately, kissing you softly and sucking on your bottom lip. You grip his jacket, his cold lips on you making you shiver as Beomgyu pulls you closer to him.
His phone rings suddenly breaking you apart and Beomgyu groans. “If it’s Soobin, I’m gonna kill him” he tells you looking at the caller id. It was indeed Soobin and you giggle. Beomgyu narrows his eyes at you leaning into peck your lips again before picking up the call.
“What is it loser?” He asked. You could hear Soobin’s voice but you couldn’t figure out what he was saying.
“Yeah she is with me” Beomgyu spoke into the phone impatiently. “I don’t know- fuck off” he told Soobin before hanging up.
“What’s up?” you asked Beomgyu.
“Nothing. He wanted to know when I’m coming back home” Beomgyu told you taking your hand in his again.
“We should probably get going” you told him hopping off the stool and Beomgyu got off too. But before you could walk away, he pulled you closer to him.
“Wait- I uh, I like you- if that wasn’t obvious enough” he tells you seriously. “I wanted to tell you that for a while now but the timing was never right and you make me nervous” he tells you scratching his head and looking at you sheepishly. You smile at him, heart melting at his shyness.
“I like you too” you tell him quietly.
“I don’t want you to just say that because of you know - the kiss. Um think about it and let me know” he told you and you could feel your heart falling for him deeper. You wrapped your hands around him, initiating the action for the first time in your relationship. Beomgyu looked surprised but happy and wrapped his own arms around you.
“I have thought about it and yes I like you too. I was just scared to tell you about it because if I make you nervous you make me feel catonic inside” you tell him looking up at him. Beomgyu leans down to kiss you again, his lips were warmer now and you opened your mouth to him and he kissed you deeper still. You broke the kiss to come up for air and Beomgyu squeezed you tighter.
“I really like you” Beomgyu whispered into your ear. “I really like you too” you told him and Beomgyu smiled widely at you.
“Catonic, huh?”
“Shush”
In your heart you knew there was no coming back from this.
-.-
“Tyun i need to tell you something” you gently tell Taehyun. You both were watching a movie (his suggestion) after a long while. Beomgyu had wanted to tag along but you knew you needed this time with Taehyun.
“Tyun? Oh it must be something serious” Taehyun pauses the video before looking at you.
“It’s not serious… it’s just, well, I-“ Taehyun was looking at you with his wide eyes and it did nothing to ease your nerves.
“What is it? Don’t tell me you are pregnant” he tells you seriously. “Although if you are we will deal with that”
You burst out laughing at that slapping his arm, “I’m not pregnant” you tell him indignantly.
“Thank God, what is it then?” Taehyun pats your head softly.
“I- uh- Beomgyu and I kissed” you tell him quietly.
A beat of silence and then Taehyun laughs out. You slap his arm again. “I knew something was going on between you two”
You fall into silence, letting him process it.
“I approve or whatever” he tells you wrapping an arm around your shoulder. “He seems like a nice guy and he even got you back into the competition and the way I heard it, he even kept you back from sucker punching Yeonjun”
“He is the nicest” you assure Taehyun and he smirks down at you.
“How are things with Kai?” You ask Taehyun gently. You haven’t seen him for a while now and wondered what happened with him.
Taehyun’s smile drops immediately, sadness clouding his eyes and you feel concerned “Kai is dropping out of college” he tells you looking down at his lap.
“What? Why?” you ask surprised
Taehyun sighs before answering, “He wants to be a full time trainee and he can’t manage both his studies and practice, so he is dropping out”
You wrap both your hands around Taehyun, he looks close to tears and you’ve never seen him like this. So defeated.
“Oh Tae, didn’t you tell him to stay?” you ask softly. Taehyun nods his head. “And?” you press, needing to know what happened so you could help him out.
“He said he doesn’t have time for that right now and he has to focus on himself” Taehyun’s voice cracks and your heart breaks for him. Hugging him closer you gently pat his head and he silently cries into your shoulder.
“Shhh it’s alright” you murmur trying to calm him down.
Taehyun wipes his tears, letting go off you, “I didn’t mean to bring the mood down” he whispers.
“Fuck no. I wish you had told me this earlier” you take his hands into yours. You wipe his cheeks and rest your hand on his cheek. “It’s going to be alright” you tell him and Taehyun smiles at you softly.
“Oh well, maybe we will meet each other at a better time” Taehyun tells you ruefully and you smile at him, your heart going out for your best friend.
Taehyun leans his head into your shoulder and you rest your head on top of his. “I’m going to kick Kai’s ass the next time I see him” you tell him and Taehyun laughs before hitting the resume button.
The movie continues rolling but your heart feels heavy for your friend and you pray silently that he finds someone who treats him with the same amount of love he has for them.
-.-
This is the most crowded your studio has ever been. Soobin, Taehyun, Beomgyu and you sit around the computer screen waiting for the results. To say you were feeling nervous would be an understatement. You had listened to Yeonjuns entry and despite your pride you had to admit that it was good. Beomgyu held your hand and you gripped it back tightly.
“Stop bouncing your leg you are making me nervous” Taehyun lightly taps Soobin’s leg and he gives Taehyun an irritated expression.
“The atmosphere is getting to me” Soobin tells him
“Are you sure it comes out at 9?” Beomgyu asks you for the fifth time in the last twenty minutes and even Taehyun groans. You fight back your urge to punch him (which wouldn’t have been very romantic).
You hit the refresh button again and your breath stops. The results were out. There is complete silence in the studio. None of you are ready to look at the screen. Soobin covers his eyes and Taehyun hides his head behind Soobins shoulder. You look at Beomgyu. He smiles at you nervously before giving your hand a squeeze giving you a boost of confidence and you scroll down.
“Huh?” Is all you can say.
“What is it?” Taehyun groans.
You start laughing. “If We Ever Met Again won the first prize” you tell them.
“What?” The boys crowd over your computer. “Who the fuck is Lim Young Woong?” Soobin asks.
“Fourth year student apparently but wait- you guys won second place!!” Taehyun jumps up and that’s when you see the rest of the list.
“Lonely Boy is in fifth place… ohhh Yeonjun won’t be happy with this” Taehyun was still reading the list but your eyes focus on Beomgyu. You turn to him and hug him tightly. Beomgyu picks you up, giving you a little twirl and you both start laughing. He leans down and kisses you softly and you hear Taehyun making gagging noises but you ignore them kissing Beomgyu back. So what if you didn’t win? You beat Yeonjun which had been your reason for entering in the first place.
“I’m happy with the results” Beomgyu tells you. Oh and you ended up with the softest boy on campus. “Me too. Yay for us” you tell him looking into his eyes.
“The way they are acting you would think they won” Taehyun tells Soobin.
“My brain is ready to throw up. Hey, by the way, there is a game on campus tonight, do you wanna come ?” Soobin nudges Taehyun’s shoulder. “Although it might be halfway done by now”
“Definitely. Anything to get away from this muck.”
Taehyun and Soobin head out of your studio and you barely yell out a bye at them before Beomgyu pulls you into another kiss. “Come back home with me Y/N” he whispers softly “Please” and you nod your head at him giving his nose a small kiss.
-.-
It’s been almost an hour since you both have been talking and occasionally making out on Beomgyu’s bed. You sit on his lap trying not to think too much and Beomgyu smiles lazily at you. Both his hands are on your waist. At some point you had taken off his shirt and he wanted to take off yours too you could tell.
“Hmm but you still haven’t told me why you stopped talking to me” you ask him.
“When are you ever going to stop talking about that” Beomgyu groans out.
“What else do I have to annoy you with?” You smile at him.
“Fine. I was jealous alright? I didn’t like seeing you with that asshole and I could tell he wasn’t right for you” Beomgyu huffs out.
“Aww” you tell him squishing his cheeks with your hands making his lips pout at you. Beomgyu narrows his eyes at you pulling your hands away from his face but you continue smiling at him and he raises his legs making you jolt forward to his chest. You cling to him for balance and Beomgyu smirks. Oh is that how he is going to play, you think to yourself before rolling your hips slightly against him and his expression changes immediately.
Beomgyu flips you over so that you end up under him and he hovers above you. Your eyes widen and he leans down to kiss you again.
“Take this off for me” he tells you pulling at your tshirt and you take it off, leaving you just in your bra and shorts. Beomgyu stares intensely at your figure and you feel embarrassed so you look away from him. He pulls your chin to catch your eyes. “You are so beautiful” he tells you before leaving small kisses down your face to your chest and he unclasps your bra throwing it behind you.
His mouth quicky latches onto one of your boobs and his hands massage the other one and you have to fight back your moans.
“Please” you manage to say out loud and Beomgyu looks at you.
“Please what princess?” He smiles at you and you cover your face in embarrassment.
“Nuh-uh don’t hide away from me” he says tugging your hands off your face and kissing your cheeks. His hands play with your shorts like he wants to take them off.
“I want you” you tell him and Beomgyu grins cheekily at you so you give his shoulder a slap.
Beomgyu pulls down your shorts and panties leaving feather light kisses on your inner thighs before kissing you where you need it the most. You’ve never felt this good before. You arch your back and Beomgyu places a hand over your waist to keep you down, sucking on you softly. He puts a finger in and you moan out loud. He continues kissing and sucking you and you grip his hair tugging on it and he groans against you slightly.
“Gyu I’m close” you manage to say. The nickname slips out of you and Beomgyu’s heart does a summersault.
“Yeah? Come for me princess” he tells you and you let go. His tongue and lips are still on you cleaning you up before you pull him up to you kissing him fiercely tasting yourself on his lips.
Your hands go to his pants pulling them off and you are about to touch him but he pulls your hand away. “I wanna be inside you” he tells you and you blush.
Beomgyu can barely control himself. The way you innocently look at him makes him go wild. He puts on a condom and aligns himself at your entrance looking at you. He holds on of your hands. You tug him closer to you and Beomgyu kisses you softly before entering in you.
You’ve never felt so full and you can tell he is going easy on you giving you time to adjust around him. “Fuck Y/N, you are so tight” he manages out.
“Gyu, move please” you whisper in his ear and Beomgyu slowly starts rolling his hips against you. He builds up a rhythm quickly, your sounds giving him more drive bringing you closer to your orgasm. “You’re mine princess aren’t you” he whispers harshly in your ear.
“Yes” you cry out holding onto his shoulders already on edge.
“I won’t last long if you clamp around me like that” Beomgyu huffs out and you whine.
“Come with me baby” he tells you kissing your neck and that’s your last straw before you both come together.
Beomgyu lays down next to you, kissing your shoulder and holding your hand. He had been holding it all this time and it’s all hot and clammy but Beomgyu refuses to let go. He slowly pulls out and you whimper slightly at the loss.
He gets up and you barely have the energy to ask him where he is going before he comes back to clean you up with a wet towel.
Beomgyu lies down next to you, throwing his blanket over your bodies and holding you close to him. You turn around in his arms and he pushes your hair out of your face. You are pretty sure you look disgusting but Beomgyu looks at you like you are the lady of the lake.
“You are so pretty” he murmurs.
You shake your head before giving him a soft kiss on his lips and then burying your head into his chest in shyness and Beomgyu laughs silently.
“After all that you are still shy?” He asks you.
“Shut up” you say into his chest
“You know, I might even L word you soon” he tells you.
“I might beat you to the punch” you tell him and Beomgyu holds you tighter against him.
Your lyrics play around in your head before you drift off to dreamland with him.
-.-
“The water that swallowed scars will become calm someday, and it will have a wide embrace”
🤍🎧 and there it is ;) i really hope you enjoyed reading this as much as i enjoyed writing it. if you liked this please consider leaving a like and reblog it helps me out a lot and consider checking out my other fics. feedback’s of any kind are appreciated 🤍🎧
CAST | choi beomgyu, choi yeonjun, yoo jimin (karina), mentions of choi soobin, yang jeongin (i.n), shin ryujin, lee heeseung, kim minjeong (winter)
WC | 28.2k
GENRE | angst, smut, childhood friends to lovers, friends to lovers, neighbor!au, boy next door!au, right person wrong time (sort of)
WARNINGS | explicit language, explicit smut & sexual content, infidelity, toxic relationship, verbal abuse, mc has a present mom and dad, vaping & smoking cigarettes, marijuana mentions
SYNOPSIS | SEQUEL TO IDLE TOWN! // it’s been ten years since you last saw choi beomgyu in the flesh, but a high school reunion prompts you and your fiancé, yeonjun, to return to your hometown one last time. unfortunately, it seems like old habits die hard, and the harder you try to stay away from beomgyu, the closer he seems to get.
A/N | i was not planning on a sequel but sometimes the heart wants what it wants and i just had to write this. idle town readers, welcome back, and if you haven’t read the prequel then it’s linked in both the synopsis above and next to my masterlist below. it’s not required to read part one, but it’s helpful and provides context.
request to be added to current and future taglists HERE!
listen to the playlist here!
MASTERLIST | IDLE TOWN (PT. 1)
TEN YEARS LATER.
The day that you receive the envelope in the mail was the day that everything started going downhill. Now that you think about it, when was your peak? Was it as soon as you stepped foot in the city you’d always dreamed of living in? Was it when you met Yeonjun? Was it when you started working at that publishing company with amazing pay and benefits?
All in all, you’re not really sure. But if you had to pick a simple “best moment,” it would probably be your college graduation.
It was the perfect summer day. You’d aced your last semester of classes and had numerous colorful cords around your neck, showing off your accomplishments from the past four years. You sat between two people that you were semi-close with now, what with being almost forced to talk to them during rehearsals and all. They were alright, maybe you’d have even been friends with them in school if you met them earlier. Maybe being the key word. So instead, you sit between them, exchanging excited words in hushed whispers, making small talk, asking them what their plans are after the ceremony is over with. One of them invited the two of you to an end-of-school party that one of the frats is throwing; you had no clue about it. But as they explain the theme, saying that it’d be fun to end your last year with a typical college party—something that you’d probably never get the chance to do again—you start thinking, why not? What do you have to lose?
The ceremony itself is great. Nothing goes wrong, even though in these sorts of situations you always expect something to go awry. It doesn’t start raining, no one trips or messes up their words, the speeches aren’t too dull (as far as graduation speeches go), and the cheers for you as you walk across the stage are almost deafening. You can’t help the wide, almost cocky grin that spreads across your face as you turn to the crowd and wave once towards the area you know your loved ones are sitting in, spotting Yeonjun’s pink hair right away. He sticks out like a sore thumb, almost neon in the bright sunlight in comparison to the people around him. You hear his voice rise up above everyone else’s cheers, yelling your name amongst praise and sweet words. It makes you blush, how he’s not afraid to say such sappy shit in front of your parents, in front of your friends—in front of your entire graduating class, really.
The rest of the ceremony goes by in a blur. You can’t stop smiling even if you’re a little clammy underneath your cords and robe and cap, and your grin grows even wider once you’re able to toss your cap in the air and then go find your loved ones.
You see Yeonjun first, parting the crowd like the Red Sea. It’s kind of impossible to not see him. That’s something you’ve always equally liked and disliked about him—he attracted attention wherever he went. And not always from those who were sexually attracted to him, though that was, admittedly, a large portion of the attention that he got. No, he emitted this glow when he walked into a room. There was something about him that demanded your attention, even if you were unwilling to give it up. It was partially his looks—god, was he stunning—but also, the charm that basically oozed from his pores. You’d never known anyone that didn’t like Yeonjun. Even if they were apprehensive at first, no one could resist his genuinity, his kind nature that collided with his sharp visuals that sometimes made him come off as the cold or arrogant sort of attractive. But of course, no one ever thought of him as cold or arrogant as soon as he opened his mouth.
You liked this about him because it was easy. Everyone loved him: your friends, your classmates, and most importantly, your family. “He’s such a catch,” your friend Yeji said jealously, eyeing him as he walked away after dropping off lunch for you. “I wish I had a partner that would bring me a homemade meal.”
“And he drove half an hour to get here,” you bragged playfully, shaking your little dosirak full of food, still warm to the touch.
When he met your parents, your mother waited until he left the room before nudging you and smiling. “That’s a keeper,” she said happily, “I couldn’t think of anyone better for you.” The only issue with this was the fact that you noticed her stumble over the second part of that sentence, and it made you think of someone that you hadn’t bothered to think about in years.
But when Yeonjun was there, any semblance of thought towards that someone melted away almost immediately.
You run into his arms, almost crushing the massive bouquet of flowers that he’s holding gently. He holds it above the both of you with one hand and catches you in a tight embrace in the other, laughing and trying to speak through his giggles to congratulate you. “You are the most wonderful person in the world,” he says astutely, caressing your face gently as you part. Before you can get too far, he brings you back in to kiss you softly, his hand dropping to the small of your back to bring your body closer to his. Once he lets you go, he hands you the colorful bouquet that you almost squished. It’s beautiful. The entire thing is so heavy, full of flowers that are almost as big as your head. It hides the bottom half of your face as you hold it in front of your body and he laughs, pinching your cheek and calling you cute before everyone else arrives to congratulate you.
Is it selfish of you to think of that as your peak? Why do you consider it so? Your immediate answer to that is because of how you felt, how happy you were. You were so happy that you had no more room for any other emotion, save for perhaps excitement—but even that bled into happiness, blurring the lines between which was which. But maybe you think of that as your peak because of your achievements—no, that’s not it. You’ve achieved much more since then. Then the last conclusion, and the one that you dreaded to consider, must be correct. You consider it your peak because of everyone else’s reactions. They celebrated you that day, they all paid attention to you and how much shit that you’d done in those four years. And to be fair, it was a well deserved celebration—you worked your ass off in your undergrad years, so much so that sometimes Yeonjun would have to physically stop you from pushing yourself before you collapsed from exhaustion.
Your other option for your peak in life isn’t a singular moment. But it’s happier than considering yourself to peak in college. You consider your life as a whole since you moved out of your parents’ house to be your peak. That time frame between getting on the airplane to New York City and receiving that letter in the mail, that was your peak.
It has been ten years since you left your hometown far behind when you pull that letter out from between a catalog for lacy underwear and your electricity bill, and promptly spit your coffee all over your dinner table.
The address is from your home state, your hometown. It’s the address of your high school, and sure as hell, that’s your full name written across the front of the envelope. The stamp in the corner is of the school mascot—well, the same animal as your school mascot, anyways.
Hands shaking, you wipe your mouth quickly and then use a butter knife to cut a slit in the envelope. A single piece of dense paper slides smoothly into your palm, and you gnaw on your lip until you taste blood as you read through it, eyes following the dark print, chasing it as it registers in your brain. You swear you can feel your tongue dry and your heartbeat slow as the words “HIGH SCHOOL REUNION” echo in your head. You toss the invitation back on top of the opened envelope and busy yourself with wiping up your mess of spewed coffee.
Of course, this is when Yeonjun comes back.
You hadn’t expected him to be gone long; he’d just stopped by the local bagel place to get some fresh breakfast to pair with your coffee (though your cup is now half gone, spat across your dinner table).
“What’s wrong?” he asks immediately.
That’s another thing about Yeonjun—he can read you like an open book. It’s a little annoying at times, when you want to keep certain things private or hide surprises from him, but most of the time you appreciate his intuitiveness.
You don’t say anything, but point towards the invitation that’s still on full display, laying on top of the envelope it came in. Yeonjun kicks off his shoes and sets the box of bagels on the kitchen counter before walking over to you. He kisses you on the temple and picks up the invitation, leaning against the table as he scans it. Sucking in a deep breath through his teeth, he taps the thick piece of cardstock against the solid wooden surface of the dinner table and looks at you, concern clear in his eyes. He takes in your ashen face, bloodless and unsure.
“Well,” he says, “are you going to go?”
You groan loudly and slump forward in your chair, your forehead colliding with the table with a resounding clunk. Yeonjun coos, babying you like he knows you want him to, and drapes his slim frame over your back. His weight is a welcome comfort, like your very own weighted blanket.
“I don’t know,” you say honestly. Your voice is muffled, but he understands.
“If it’s stressing you out this much already, then…” he trails off, but you already know that he’s going to suggest not going. For some reason, this pisses you off a little and you nudge him off of you and pick up your head, scowling at him.
“What if I want to go?” you ask, frowning.
“Then go, of course,” he says, walking back into the kitchen to retrieve the bagels. His voice echoes through the hallway, preceding his physical return to you. “I just assumed that you didn’t want to because—“
“Because of Beomgyu,” you finish for him.
Yeonjun stops, freezing up at the sound of his name. You do too. It’s like you’ve been literally frozen—you feel so unbearably cold, and you can’t move an inch even though you’re the one that said it in the first place.
“I was going to say because of your reaction to the invitation,” Yeonjun says carefully. He still does not finish his route back to you. Instead, he stands there, halfway between the kitchen and you, very still. In his slim fit dark pants and sweater, he almost blends into the background.
There’s an uncomfortable silence that settles between the two of you, making itself comfortable atop all the surfaces in your home. Outside, it begins to rain. The only sound is the scattered raindrops that are beginning to pit-a-pat against the roof of your apartment building and the tiny fire escape.
After what seems like an eternity of stunned silence—you’re both still so shocked that you even uttered his name—you clear your throat to break the ice and say, “Well, I probably won’t go anyways. I hate that town.”
“Right.”
You both resume your day as usual, but the air is different. You’re both much more reserved and careful with what you say, something that’s rare for Yeonjun, who usually likes to speak his mind even if it comes off as a bit brash sometimes.
The reunion is not discussed any further until the week of, when you slide two plane tickets across the dinner table to Yeonjun, the destination being your hometown.
“Come or don’t,” you say, “but it’ll be uneventful either way.”
“I know this means a lot to you even if you refuse to say it out loud,” Yeonjun says knowingly. “I’m not an idiot.”
“You’re not an idiot, but you’re also unusually good at reading my mind,” you murmur. This prompts Yeonjun to crack a smile.
“Well, since you already bought me a ticket…”
“I can get a refund,” you retort, but he knows that it’s a lighthearted joke.
“Not a chance.” He snatches up the tickets and walks over to you, slinging an arm around your shoulders and holding the papers up to the light. “High school reunion, here we come.”
—-
Maybe you should be more nervous.
Or maybe it just hasn’t kicked in yet.
Because the thing is, it’s not like you haven’t been back to your hometown at all since you left for college. You come home for certain holidays, for special days, for celebrations or times of mourning.
So far, it feels like another one of those times.
In your head, it’s just like you’re going home for Christmas, or for your mother’s birthday. Nothing has been really different just yet, so it has yet to hit you.
It’s only once you’re back in your childhood bedroom, with Yeonjun standing next to you, that you begin to feel uneasy. The only time you’d stayed in your childhood bedroom (after you’d moved out, of course) was for a long weekend during Christmas a few years back. Every other time, Yeonjun had come with you, and the two of you stayed in a nearby hotel. This time, before you could book a room, your mother had called you and demanded that the two of you stay in your childhood home.
“Cancel your hotel room,” your mother said cheerfully, once you’d picked up her call.
“Why?” you asked, stifling a yawn and blinking your dry eyes simultaneously; she’d woken you up from a late afternoon nap. Golden sunshine was pouring into your bedroom like honey, splashing across the length of your shared king-sized bed. It was the first real sunshine to penetrate through the thicket of fog and storm clouds, the last lingering signs of spring before summer took over. The air was warm and heavy, scented heavily with the spices Yeonjun was using to cook dinner in the kitchen. The bedroom door was slightly ajar, and of course this is why the smell of food was so strong. You sit up as your mother starts talking again, wrapping a soft throw blanket loosely around your shoulders. It’s only a few steps to the window, but your bare feet are quickly getting chilled from the hardwood floor as you peer out the window at the setting sun.
“You and Yeonjun can just come stay at the house,” your mother prompts, but her tone is a little off.
“You know I love our house, but it’s just too small for me and Jun to stay in my room,” you say, walking back over to sit down on the edge of the bed. “We sort of tried that one year at Chuseok, remember? We tapped out at around eleven after tossing and turning for like half an hour in that tiny bed.”
“I know, but still,” she says, trailing off.
You lean down to inspect a chip in your floor. “But still what, mom?”
“We’re selling the house,” she finally says. You freeze, heart skipping a beat as you lick your dry lips.
“You’re selling it?” you ask hoarsely.
“We can’t take care of it any more,” she explains, and you can hear the pity in her voice, sweet like cough syrup. “We’re going to move to a little complex a few towns over at the end of the month.”
“Oh, Woodbury?” you ask faintly, a flash of a memory of a Woodbury Apartments catalog sitting on your parents’ coffee table the last time you’d visited, around the winter holidays.
“We just thought that you might like to stay here for the last few weeks. We’re mostly cleaned up and starting to pack…”
Your head is swimming in the warmth of your bedroom, suddenly too hot for your taste. The blanket slides off of your shoulders as you mumble an excuse to your mother and hang up before she can even reply. You feel your phone buzzing in your hand and you know that your mother is texting you and asking if you’re alright, but you don’t answer her. You sit there until Yeonjun comes to get you for dinner, and once he sees your frail figure, shaking and clutching your phone to your chest, he scoops you into his arms and you listen to his heartbeat until the words come spilling from your lips.
You grimace, thinking back upon the memory of that phone call, as you yank the zipper on the side of your suitcase, trying to get out the bag that holds your toiletries. You packed it on top of all your clothes for easy access, for this reason exactly. The memory of your mother breaking the news to you wasn’t a good one, and the worst part was how stupid you felt for being upset about it at all. You were nearly thirty years old and you were having a breakdown over your parents selling their house?
“You grew up there, there’s a lot of memories. It makes perfect sense to feel the way you do right now,” Yeonjun had soothed, when you whimpered out your worries about sounding dumb. But you still felt shitty about feeling shitty.
But like you’d said before: nothing really felt different until you actually got back and you were unpacking in your childhood bedroom. You’d specifically asked your parents to leave it untouched so that you could pack things up yourself, and they obliged. Every other room in the house had been scrubbed clean and left simplistic, easy to clear out in just a few hours when the time came to leave for the last time.
Luckily, that wasn’t for a while yet.
First, you had to get through this damn reunion.
It took place the night after you landed, starting around eight thirty. You assumed that people would show up early, so you prepared yourself to arrive at crisp eight forty-five, just so that there was no chance of you being early nor late. You wanted to attract the least amount of attention possible from your old peers.
“If you don’t even want to see anyone, why did you decide to go?” your father asked sharply over dinner that night. A mixture of your annoyance, the tension in the room, and probably some of his pain medication for his back, was all building up. You watch through slightly narrowed eyes as your mother slips another few pills to him, a new wrinkle line appearing on her forehead. She’d tended to your father day and night since he fell off a ladder a few months ago. His tone made your head ache, and you sighed harshly—perhaps a bit too harshly, you realize, as you watch him flinch—before replying.
“I do want to see people,” you say, scowling into your dinner. Even though it’s delicious as always, prepared by your parents, you can’t seem to get much of it down before your stomach starts turning. You put down your utensil and rub your eyes, making your parents exchange an uneasy glance with an awkward Yeonjun. He didn’t really know what to do about the tension between you and your father, so he helplessly draped an arm over your hunched over frame and rubbed your shoulder comfortingly as he made a kind, somewhat pitiful expression towards your father. “It’s just that—I don’t want to see most of them, and I know that most of them haven’t ever left town. What if they ask me questions? What if they want to be friends? What if they expect something from me just because we were in the same class?”
“Woah there,” Yeonjun said, speaking up before either of your parents could offer a singular reassuring word. “Doll, if they didn’t care ten years ago, they probably won’t care now. At most you’ll get a few curious questions but it won’t be from a harmful place.”
“You weren’t there,” you glower at him, “you don’t get it.”
“Did something happen?” he asks, eyes widening. “I didn’t know… You never said anything about… Are you alright?” He stutters, trying to find the right thing to say to soothe you.
You kind of feel bad at this point, with both your parents and Yeonjun staring at you with the same concerned look written across their faces, the food in front of them untouched since the conversation started. You didn’t mean to be bitchy and bitter about it—after all, you were the one that chose to come back and go to the damned thing after all. But this was why you wanted to do it alone. As soon as it was over with, you imagined yourself returning to the playful, slightly more cheerful version of yourself that everyone knew and loved. You exhale loudly, then stand up. Your three loved ones mirror your actions, with Yeonjun straightening up to his full height beside you immediately, as if he could read your mind, and both your parents half-rising, mirroring out of pure empathy.
“I’m sorry,” you state, “I’ve just been stressed about this.” You want to say something more, give them more information about what the hell has been going on inside your head since it really clicked as you were standing there in your childhood bedroom, but your tongue feels glued to the roof of your mouth. Your jaw clenches and unclenches as the three of them stare you down, expecting more, but when they realize that is all you have to say, you watch your parents’ wrinkled faces deflate into a more relaxed expression. One that says, “my child has issues, but they’ll work through it themselves and there’s nothing we can do about it so let’s just stop freaking the fuck out.”
“It’s okay, sweetie.” Your mom says this solemnly.
When your eyes meet, you feel anger bubbling in your chest again. There is nothing but pity behind those old eyes. You know that your mom feels bad for you, her child that’s completely exiled from the hometown that they once lived in. The child that ran away to a big city and never came home again. The child that’s back home for the last time before they finally, really turn into an adult and let go of the last strings of childhood forever.
It settles, though, as she reaches over to place her cool, dry hand over yours. You look down, a little ashamed now that you’re calmer and can think clearer.
“I think I’m going to turn in early, so that I can… pack tomorrow before the reunion,” you explain, and your hand moves to pick up your dirty plate. Before you can lift it an inch off the table, your father swipes it from you and waves you and Yeonjun off.
“We got this. You two go get settled.”
You lock eyes with your father and you give him an appreciative nod. He smiles in return—yes, a sad one that is full of pity for you—and kisses you on the top of your head as he walks by you on his way to the kitchen.
You press your lips into a thin line, a slightly awkward silence emerging between the remaining people at the table. Your mother jumps up before anyone has the chance to attempt to rekindle the conversation, and brings both hers and Yeonjun’s dirty dishes to the kitchen, following your father and disappearing behind the cream wall of your dining area.
“I guess we’ll do what they say,” Yeonjun says, exhaling slowly and standing up. He pushes his chair in and tries to brush off imaginary dust from his place mat, and then looks to you for direction. Though he likes to take the lead, it seems that there is an exception when it comes to your childhood home.
You take the creaky stairs by two and slip around on the slick wooden floor, warped and smoothed down from years of sock hockey and communal use. Your childhood bedroom door is there at the end of the hallway like it always has been, illuminated by the ceiling light that’s clearly just been replaced by the sheer brightness of it. The door, which has faded crayon lines and your name in wooden letters, blue tacked to the wooden frame, is slightly ajar, just how you had left it when you went down to dinner.
The two of you sidle into the room, feeling a little claustrophobic. You spy an old purple bikini string overflowing out of one of your old dresser drawers, and your chest lurches a little as a memory of Beomgyu resurfaces. In the brief flash, Beomgyu is sitting in the middle of your bed, mud-caked high tops kicked off and laying on your shag rug. The browned laces are messy and askew, because of the haphazard way that Beomgyu had untied them messily and kicked them off carelessly. He’s dressed in a t-shirt and baggy, light colored jeans. His white socks have a hole on the left bottom and you can see pale flesh peeking through because of the way he’s laying, slumped onto his back with his feet sticking straight out in your direction. His hair is dark, long, and messy, with those white streaks that you loved so much. His brown eyes are twinkling in the dim yellow light, and just as he opens his mouth to say something to you you snap out of it.
When the image of Beomgyu dissipates completely, you realize that you’ve been staring at Yeonjun this whole time. His stature almost mirrors Beomgyu’s in the memory. But instead, Yeonjun is perched politely on the corner of your mattress, and his pointy-toed, shiny black boots are neatly lined up next to your teenage collection of shoes in your closet. Your own ankle boots had been kicked off and left in the middle of your old rug, just like the illusion of Beomgyu’s Vans had been. Yeonjun’s hair—it’s a mushroom-y shade of brown now, rather than pink—glows warmly in the light alongside his sharp, sparkling eyes, a stark contrast to Beomgyu’s midnight locks and rounded boba pearl eyes.
“Hey you,” Yeonjun teases, “where’d you go off to in Dreamland? I missed you for a few moments there.”
You realize that you’ve been fidgeting with your fingers this whole time, picking at your cuticles and peeling the surrounding skin. It’s a bad habit that tends to resurface when you’re stressed, and your fingertips burn now. You regret it, but it’s too late.
You chuckle. “Sorry, I got lost in my memories for a second.” You swallow hard, feeling choked up for some reason.
Yeonjun picks up on your watery voice and your inflamed fingers, and he smiles that goofy smile that always makes you feel soothed before he kisses your hands and starts rummaging for his own luggage to find a first aid kit. You let him baby you for a bit, jabbering over your wounds and gently rubbing in a medicated ointment to soothe the throbbing. He selects the worst wounds to bandage up, reassuring you that the other ones would be fine as long as you didn’t touch them again, but it was too late already. Your skin wouldn’t heal before tomorrow, and after that you hardly had a damn about anyone and what they thought of you. You mentally insult yourself for a moment before feeling weary, pushing Yeonjun away after he finished fixing your last finger but rewarding him with a long kiss.
He’s desperate for something more, for your attention to be solely on him. You again feel bad; your mind has been elsewhere for days now, and you know that Yeonjun can feel it.
So you relent even though you’re exhausted, and you kiss him with what you hope is passion, dragging your nails down the curve of his back to make him groan and pull you closer to him until your front halves are smushed together. Chest to chest, your bare breasts beneath your thin t-shirt brushing against his hard pecs, his groin grinding against yours. You wrap your legs around his slim waist, pulling him ephemerally closer, closer, closer. You suddenly desire him so much that it burns. It hurts in your chest and your stomach and your head and the burn can only be soothed by his touch. Slowly he pulls away from your lips though he feels intoxicated by them; if he could, he’d kiss them forever. He starts at your head, pressing light kisses to your forehead, nose, and lips. He lingers on your lips again, the feather light drag of flesh against flesh driving you insane when you were craving depraved, rough handling.
Maybe Yeonjun really did feel your desperation as you gasped aloud and clung to his frame. That faked passion in the beginning was so foolproof that you yourself feel victim to your own lying.
Yet, nothing more really happens that night. You both take off your clothes, locked in each other’s embrace, and you feel his hot mouth attaching itself to your neck, your chest, your clavicle. His wet tongue laves over the bruises he’s suckled onto your flesh, narrowed eyes looking up to you for approval. You stroke his hair, and the texture is even different from Beomgyu’s—you remember when he would lay his head in your lap during your sleepovers, and every now and then he’d shift and lock eyes with you, grinning foolishly like he always did. You didn’t realize how much you missed him until now, until you found yourself in a place that reeked of familiarity, that reeked of him. If you closed your eyes and tried hard enough, you think you could smell the cologne that he wore all those years ago. It’s musky, yet sharp, and he wore so much of it sometimes that you couldn’t ever hug him without your eyes watering and your nose wrinkling.
Yeonjun’s mouth parts from a particularly sensitive spot on your neck, a string of saliva from his lip connecting to your neck for just a moment longer before breaking. He places a soft, wet kiss on your lips, lingering there for just a little too long before he pulls away and smiles at you.
“Everything’s going to be okay,” he says quietly. You fix your gaze on your fiancé, his face smooth and soft in the warm glow from your bedside lamp. That’s the only source of light in the room apart from the slivers of pale moonlight that are barely creeping in through a crack in your dusty butterfly patterned curtains.
“I know.” You place a kiss on his forehead, which he receives gratefully, happy to have your attention. At least, some of it. More than he’d been receiving recently.
“Do you want me to come with you tomorrow?” he asks, following you to the bathroom.
You clutch at the plastic bag holding your toothbrush and toothpaste, along with other toiletries. “Do you want to come?” you ask, as he closes the bathroom door behind him as he walks in. You turn on the faucet, wetting your toothbrush and squeezing a blob of mint green toothpaste onto the bristles. Yeonjun reaches over to turn off the water.
“Do you want me to come?” he asks. “It’s your high school reunion, and if you’re more comfortable going alone then I understand. But if you want me to come—especially because he might be there—I would love to.”
You accidentally jab yourself in the gums with the hard plastic of your toothbrush at the mention of Beomgyu. Even though he didn’t say the name aloud, you knew that was who he was referring to. You groan, spitting out the mixture of blood and foamy toothpaste into the sink as you turn the water back on and watch the mixture go down the drain. “I know I’ve made it seem like a really big deal,” you said, choosing your words carefully, as to not offend your somewhat hot headed fiancé, “but it’s really not. I think I was just overwhelmed because of all the memories here, and the fact that my parents are selling the house. But really Jun, it’s not that big of a deal. I’ll be there for an hour, max.”
“Then you’ll be back and we can finish packing,” he says promptly.
A warm feeling washes over your body at the way Yeonjun always used words like “we” and “us” constantly. It always made you feel like part of a team, like a relationship should be. Such a simple gesture made you feel so safe and loved.
“Yes,” you said, pinching his cheek playfully, “then we can finish packing, and my parents can sell the house and we can go home.”
Yeonjun grabs your hand and plants a kiss on the back of it, making you blush as you pull it away. “I can’t even brush my teeth in peace,” you tease.
“What can I say? If you’re gone for more than five minutes, I start to miss you too much.” Yeonjun winks before leaving you to finish washing up in peace, and you sigh softly as he closes the door. You look in the mirror, and you look tired even though you’ve yet to start packing at all. Really, it won’t be a big job. What’s more exhausting to think about is the reunion.
You can almost picture a devil and an angel on your shoulders as you stare at your reflection in the mirror as you pat in your skincare.
Listen to everyone else, the devil-you scolds. She scowls up at you. Why are you even going to the reunion? You could just skip it tomorrow and help your parents pack up the rest of the house. Your trip home won’t be a waste, and you’ll suffer less. It’s a win-win situation, she pressed.
Because she has to prove to her old classmates that she’s successful now! the angel on your other shoulder pipes up cheerfully. And isn’t it nice to see old friends anyways?
The devil scoffs. If she has to prove that she’s successful, is she really successful at all? And what old friends are you even talking about? She had Beomgyu, and that was all. There is zero point in going to this stupid reunion.
Maybe if we see Beomgyu again, he’ll fall in love with her again and she can live the life she always wondered if she could have if she’d just forgiven him—
You throw a fistful of water at the mirror, washing away the hallucinations. Your eyes are rounded and panicked, from the angel speaking your greatest fear aloud. You always told yourself that if you never thought about it again, it wasn’t real. You didn’t really think or care about it; it was just an intrusive thought.
Now, it was too real. Your angel spoke the truth.
You may not be in love with Choi Beomgyu, but you sure as hell have laid awake many nights wondering what would have happened if you did love him back.
Even more so, what would have happened if you’d never gone to New York in the first place, and stayed with him like he wanted you to.
—
“That’s the last box of books,” you wheeze.
Collapsing on top of a freshly sealed box filled with your dusty collection of Harry Potter books, you stare up at your ceiling. Yeonjun’s sweaty forehead appears in your line of vision, a playful expression on his pretty face. “Tired already?” he asks, pulling you up. You groan loudly as you get back on your feet, squeezing his hand tightly.
“The books are heavy,” you complain.
“That’s your fault for being such a nerd and having ten million books crammed into one room,” he retorts, wiping his brow with his forearm. “But enough of that. We’re done with it now.”
You sit down on the floor, which is bare now. The first thing you two had done was roll up your old flower-patterned rug and take it down to the main floor so that the movers could easily pick it up with the rest of your parents’ stuff once they arrived early next week. A half empty bottle of water sits next to you, and you reach for it and chug the remaining liquid. A bead of sweat rolls down your temple and collects in the collar of your dusty t-shirt.
“We did a lot for just one day,” you praise, as you look up at your newly empty shelves. “It already looks so much emptier in here.”
“It really does,” Yeonjun says, sitting beside you and squinting at the empty bookshelves.
You pick up your phone, and your eyes widen at the time. You wanted to give yourself enough time to get ready without rushing and stressing yourself out further.
“You better get going,” Yeonjun said, noting your reaction to the time. “Don’t want to be late.”
“I won’t be,” you say confidently. You give him a quick peck on the lips before dashing off to take a shower and wash away all of the dust and sweat before getting dressed.
Besides stressing yourself out about going in the first place, the next big thing you worried about was what you were going to wear. You didn’t want to show up under or overdressed, and you’d done countless hours of research on what was usually proper. You even scoured some of your old peers’ social media to see if they’d posted at all about the reunion, any hints of what they would look like. Well, their outfits, at least.
Luckily, it seemed like a lot of your classmates still liked to over share, and you found out more about what others planned to wear that night. Turns out, you had stressed out over almost nothing, as usual. You picked out an outfit from the few choices you’d stuffed into your suitcase, finding something almost new and just fancy enough to put your old classmates to shame. Yes, you were definitely going to outdo your frenemy Shin Ryujin, and without looking tacky too, as Lee Heeseung tended to do. Lucky for him, he was handsome enough that people looked past his terrible sense of fashion and liked him anyways.
You almost tripped down the worn wooden stairs as you tried to multitask and double-check the location while pulling on your left shoe. It wasn’t like you even needed to look it up on your phone; you knew the way to your old high school like the back of your hand. You’d walked there every day for four years, and driven there countless times with other people. You could close your eyes and find yourself there in a matter of fifteen minutes (or less).
Yeonjun had insisted on driving you there himself, and he promised you that he’d pick you up as soon as you texted him as well. You felt your heart flutter as he insisted on escorting you, liking the feeling of being cared for. He played music from a decade ago and sang along, making you giggle and pushing your anxiety to the back of your mind.
Then before you knew it, with a quick kiss, you gathered up your things and left your parents’ car, and stepped out onto the sidewalk in front of your old high school. It’s littered with cigarette butts and old chewed gum, just like it was back in the day, and a wave of nostalgia fills you as you inhale the familiar scent of marijuana and crayons, a jarring juxtaposition that oddly made your heart ache for those years you spent on the cusp of adulthood and the cliff edge of childhood. The very same years that you spent suffering through high school in the very building you were staring at now.
The front entrance is decked out in colorful balloons and a long white banner that reads “WELCOME CLASS OF ‘08” in crooked black paint. You manage a tight-lipped smile at the staff at the entrance, and duck into the main hallway, where a few people are mingling by the sidelines. The gymnasium is booming with music, and it’s almost too similar to your senior prom (which you of course attended with Beomgyu).
You don’t recognize the few people talking outside in the hallway, so you prepare yourself to enter the gymnasium. You have to take a deep breath and look down at your outfit to make sure you’re not in your seafoam green prom dress. The watch on your wrist almost feels the same weight as your oversized corsage made of baby’s breath and small dyed blue buds. Your ankle boots seem to morph into dirty black Converse with scribbles on the toes. You catch a glimpse of yourself in the shiny reflection of the freshly repainted lockers, and your rippled reflection is ten years younger, with unblended green eyeshadow plastered up to your eyebrows and a brown-red lipstick on your lips. Your hair is very reminiscent of the time, and your nails are bitten but painted with matching green nail polish. Underneath your dress, your toenails are slathered with the same shade even though they wouldn’t show with your choice in shoes.
You feel ten years lighter, ten years dumber, ten years younger.
TEN YEARS BEFORE.
You’ve never had a panic attack before, but you think you’re having one now.
In the girls’ bathroom.
At school.
During your senior prom.
You’re breathing heavily, wheezing as your lungs seem to collapse in on themselves. Your manicured hands are gripping the sides of the porcelain sink so tightly your knuckles ache, and you’re staring at your reflection in the mirror. Your eyes are teary, but you know that if you let those tears fall your face will be streaked with metallic green trails for the rest of the night. You grit your teeth and will the wetness in your eyes to go the hell away.
Beomgyu was waiting for you outside the bathroom.
He’d never even asked you to go to prom with him; he just assumed that the two of you would go together. The week before prom, you complained about not having a date, and he’d turned to you with a surprised look, asking why you couldn’t go with him. For some reason, it hurt your feelings a little when he said that you were his best friend, but it healed the wound a little when he said that there was no one else he’d rather go with.
He was so handsome in his suit. You knew that his mother picked it up at Dillard’s and had made slight adjustments herself so that it would fit him perfectly. Even so, the white shirt underneath was wrinkled and his tie was crooked, veering to the right. It didn’t matter to you though, and you’d smiled nervously, blushing from your nose to your toes as he offered you a corsage and you held out the boutineer.
You felt like he was your boyfriend even though you walked the same way to school you did every day. The only difference was that you were all dressed up—and the simple fact that anyone who saw the two of you would assume you were a couple. Especially with the way he had offered his arm to you, and the way you were currently walking perfectly in time as you clutched his thin but muscular arm.
It was too much when you both got to the school and he kissed you on the cheek right before the two of you walked into the gymnasium. Choppy locks of his messy wolf cut fell into his big brown eyes as he grinned at you, cocking his head to the side innocently as you nearly sweat through your makeup.
Then, you ended up in the bathroom. A messy stuttered excuse to Beomgyu had to suffice, and you rushed away from him, clammy hands lifting up the train of your dress so that you didn’t trip as you ran away.
He’s your best friend, idiot, you murmur under your breath, staring at your ragged reflection in the mirror. Stop acting like such a freak. You have a month before you go to school an hour away, and then you won’t have to worry about these feelings ever again.
You place a hand over your heart, feeling the rapid beating start to finally slow as you take deep breaths and reassure yourself that it’s going to be okay. It’s been harder and harder to tamp down the weird bubbling feelings towards Beomgyu, and you’ve never been happier to be attending your back-up school in the fall. Anything is better than here, you think, grimacing. Anywhere away from Beomgyu will help me work out my shit without him interfering.
“Your shit” refers to these odd feelings. Obviously.
You finally let go of the sink and take a step back, relaxing your shoulders and looking at yourself one last time. You look normal. Your face is no longer scrunched up in a confused, panicked expression, and your chest isn’t heaving with shallow breaths. Your hands are less clammy and you feel more at ease. Right before you turn away, you fix the corner of your lipstick with your pinky finger, then spin on your heel and exit the bathroom.
Beomgyu is waiting there, slumped against the lockers, picking at a cuticle. When you come back, his face lights up, and you can’t help but allow yourself to love him more than a friend, even if it’s just for one night.
TEN YEARS LATER.
You practically relive your senior prom in that same bathroom, clutching the sides of the sink and staring at your reflection with a mixture of nausea and anger bubbling in your stomach. This time, all you have to do is take a long drag from your vape before the tension in your head starts to loosen. You exhale, a cloud of white slipping from between your lips as you stuff the little device back in your purse, between your lipstick and your box of cigarettes.
You feel like your old wallflower self again as you lean against the door before pushing it open to exit the bathroom again. For some reason, being in that bathroom again reminded you of the days where you’d skip class and eat lunch alone. You didn’t want to go back out to the crowd, something that you didn’t have any problems with after you graduated high school and came out of your shell for once and for all. But now, surrounded by your past, your hand hesitates a little before pushing the door open and leaving the confines of a place that’s seen you at your best and your worst for the better part of four years.
Then it starts to feel like things are moving in slow motion.
You’re hyper focused on the fact that the heavy bathroom door had dragged a clump of wet paper towels out of the bathroom and across the freshly waxed floors. You grimace as you step around the sodden mess, making a face and successfully avoiding the paper pile.
You look up, the ghost of a scowl still present on your face, and then you see him.
It’s been ten years since you’ve seen Choi Beomgyu, and it’s such a strange feeling that resonates through your entire body that you actually feel bile rising hot in your throat. You swallow hard, tasting bitter stomach acid, and can’t do anything else but stare.
It’s stupid really; you feel, again, like your stupid teenage self. The one who froze up in uncomfortable situations, the one who cried too easily, the one with seemingly permanently sweaty palms that no boy would ever want to touch, especially not when you were around other more radiant individuals. No, you felt like you hadn’t changed at all as you stared at Choi Beomgyu the same way you did when you were eighteen: with nothing but love and pure adoration in your eyes.
But that’s not to say it wasn’t terribly conflicting.
As soon as you saw him and it actually registered in your mind that it was him in real life and not some ghostly memory, you felt your throat tighten as you thought of the last interaction you had with him. Those old familiar feelings of softness and love faded as you remembered the full extent of what he did, and it was hard to just pretend like that didn’t happen. You would never forget that.
But god, was he gorgeous.
Ten years had nothing on him. Even though twenty-eight wasn’t old in the slightest, you could still see signs of aging in your other classmates. Some had hairlines that had receded much further back than they were when they were eighteen, some had the beginnings of smile lines and crow’s feet, and some even had some wisps of gray hair, though it was only a select few.
Beomgyu on the other hand looked exactly the same, yet so oddly different you almost couldn’t recognize him unless you looked very closely. You wondered for a moment how different he’d look in your eyes if you’d been by his side for the past decade and watched him age right beside you, rather than miles and miles away, both physically and metaphorically. Then, you attribute the weird unfamiliar feeling in the pit of your stomach to the fact that you haven’t seen him in years. Because really, you hardly know him any more. You can’t really call him your best friend if you have had zero contact for a decade.
His hair, which you remembered was always messy, shaggy, and unkempt, was cut shorter. Instead of the dark natural black with white streaks, it was a reddish brown. It was just short enough to be acceptable for a professional job, but long enough that it still looked like Beomgyu. His bangs still fell into his eyes the same way as he leaned forward to laugh, and your heart ached as you heard the tail-end of his goofy chuckle. He stood right outside the gymnasium entrance, talking with a guy whose name you think was Soobin. You distantly remember him at the graduation ceremony. He leans against the lockers nonchalantly, making you remember your senior prom again, but this time the way he does so isn’t in a cocky way. He looks genuinely relaxed as his shoulder rests against the cold painted metal, nodding along as Soobin chatters away to him.
This entire time, you’ve been standing right outside the women’s restroom. You’re kind of surprised that no one’s asked you to move out of the way, given how long you were standing there like an idiot with your mouth hanging open like a fish’s.
Luckily, no one really gave a fuck.
People were flying by, most of them on the phone and saying something like, “I was just there! You told me to meet you by the entrance! No, the front entrance!” Others were just standing around, either focusing way too much on their own conversations or typing aggressively on their phones without paying any attention to those around them, which included you.
You fight the urge to whip out a cigarette right then and there, feeling a headache coming on.
Taking out your own phone, you shoot a quick text to Yeonjun, who’s already asking you when you think you might be ready to leave. Unsurprisingly, you already feel exhausted and plan to just stop by the main room and then get the fuck out.
When you look back to the entrance of the gymnasium, Beomgyu and Soobin have disappeared, and you catch a glimpse of Beomgyu’s pale blue dress shirt and Soobin’s khakis rounding the corner to the men’s room, opposite where you’re standing. You breathe a sigh of relief and enter the main room, chewing on your bottom lip as you look around for anyone you know.
It really is like senior prom, you think grimly, as you sidle over to a table with drinks and snacks. You pick up a can of lemonade and pop it open with the little tab, taking little sips from it as you look around some more.
“I didn’t think I’d see you here.”
You swallow a mouthful of lemonade and turn to the source of the voice, eyes widening a little in surprise.
It’s Karina, who looks as beautiful as ever. Like Beomgyu, she doesn’t seem to have aged at all, rather, her beauty seemed even more radiant. You knew immediately that she was the type to simply get better looking with age, and you couldn’t help but feel a little jealous at that thought.
She offers you a small smile and stands next to you, looking you over with a satisfied look. “You look really good,” she said honestly, “how have you been?”
You let out a long sigh, ending it with a bitter chuckle. “I’ve been good, finished school, got engaged. After I finish helping my parents pack up the house I won’t have a reason to come back here ever again, so I thought why not?”
“Right, I heard about them moving out. Where to?”
“Some apartment complex, I forgot the name.”
“Was it Autumn Oaks?”
You shake your head no, pursing your lips. “No, that’s not it…” you mumble. trying to remember. Then it comes to you, and you snap your fingers at no one in particular. “Woodbury!” you say, silently commending yourself on remembering the name.
“Oh! I must have been wrong then,” Karina laughs, and you’re again jealous of her because of how delicate and pretty she sounds. It’s like the tinkling of little silver bells. Her eyes scrunch up when she laughs, and your gaze washes over her pretty face. Her laughter subsides, and it becomes just a little awkward as she clears her throat. “So, engaged, huh? Who’s the lucky guy?”
You feel a blush creeping onto your face; your cheeks feel hot.
“Yeah, his name’s Yeonjun. I met him as soon as I got to New York and we’ve been inseparable ever since.” You feel a little sheepish talking about him for some reason, and you’re unsure why. You’re very proud to have a partner as loving, handsome, talented, and successful as Yeonjun. Yet, it’s still weird to admit your love for him. It’s like he doesn’t fit with this version of you. And then you wonder, for a brief moment, if that really matters—have you really changed that much since high school? So much so that Yeonjun doesn’t even fit into the world you used to live in?
Awkwardly, you show Karina the home screen on your phone for reference. It’s a cute selfie of you and Yeonjun from the past winter holidays. When the photo was taken, you and Yeonjun had been on an evening stroll when it started to snow, and heavily. The snowflakes were more like clumps, so many little particles gathered together all at once. In the photo you can see the snow clumps clinging to your winter clothes, your hair, even some resting on your eyelashes and eyebrows. Your noses are red from the cold, a single puff of breath escaping your mouth as you’re caught mid-laugh, mid-smile, permanently in the picture.
At first you hated that picture. You hated that Yeonjun took it when you were caught off guard, hated the way you looked in it. But the more that you looked, the softer your reaction got, and eventually you came to love the photo as much as Yeonjun did. At least, you loved the way he looked in it. With his eyes almost closed from his whole face being scrunched up with laughter, his exposed teeth in his wide smile, and his strong arm wrapped around your shoulders, he looked like the sweetest boyfriend ever.
Karina seemed to think so too as she audibly cooed at the picture. “You guys are adorable,” she declared. Then she stops talking, swiftly brushing a strand of hair behind her ear before she locks eyes with you and continues. “Honestly, and I don’t mean this in a bad way at all, I promise—I always thought that you and Beomgyu would end up together.”
There’s a pregnant pause, and it was like everyone in the room held their breath before you remembered where you were and laughed, a little too loudly to be natural. “That’s crazy!” you say between fake chuckles, feeling your stomach turn. You briefly wonder what Karina would do if you threw up all over her, and then pray to any higher being out there that it wouldn’t actually happen. “What makes you think that?” you ask quickly, before she can respond to your exclamation.
She flushes a dark pink. “Oh you know…” she waves a hand in the air. “You two were always together, like always. Everyone thought you were already dating, even if you never were. We all thought so.”
You get déjá vu, remembering the last time you talked to Karina—when she asked you to hook her up with Beomgyu. You get irrationally angry over this, pushing aside the fact that it’s been ten years since she liked him, and you have a fiancé who obviously isn’t Beomgyu.
You force a tight-lipped smile, squeezing your can of lemonade so hard it crunches in your fist a little. Karina doesn’t seem to notice, taking a long sip of her own lemonade.
“Well, it was really nice catching up,” she says, after it’s clear you’re not going to further the conversation. “Good luck. Not that you’ll need it.” She holds out her free hand to you, and you grip it firmly as you both shake. You both burst out into giggles at the odd formality, and the butterflies you get from laughing with a female friend is like nothing else. You wish that you’d had a friend like her in high school. Maybe you even wish that you’d been her friend back in high school.
“Thanks,” you say, “you too. It was so good to see you again.” You find that you genuinely mean it, and a fire roars in your chest. This was what you wanted. You wanted to come back for closure, and now you have it. You saw Beomgyu and he seemed to be doing just fine without you, mended things with the one person you weren’t on great terms with, and you’re folding it all up in your metaphorical box of childhood memories. You can just feel the satisfaction of tying the ribbon and moving on to the next chapter of your life without anything weighing you down.
How mature, you think, to be able to move on from childhood just like that.
You feel accomplished, and a weight that you didn’t even know about has been lifted on your shoulders. You feel lighter than air; you felt as if you could walk amongst the stars if you tried. There’s nothing more for you to do, so you gather yourself and take a deep breath before exiting the gymnasium, giving it one last look. Still, it felt like only yesterday that you’d walked these halls as a student. Those miserable (yet wonderful) years felt like a lightyear and a day away simultaneously.
You’re fumbling through your purse for your phone, to text Yeonjun when your keychain falls out from your vigorous digging. It lands with a loud clink, metal hitting linoleum, and you groan, moving to pick it up, but another hand snatches it before you do.
Standing up, you readjust your purse as the person holds the keychain out to you. “Thanks,” you sigh, reaching for it.
They tug it away then, and you jerk your hand back in surprise. “Where did you get this charm?” the person asks in an accusatory tone.
You finally get your purse back on your shoulder and look the freak in the eyes, but just as you’re about to give them a piece of your mind it clicks. Your breath is stolen from you; you feel like you’re shriveling up on the spot, no oxygen flowing through your veins.
Choi Beomgyu is standing in front of you, frowning at your old matching keychains.
Why hadn’t you gotten a new one, damn it? It’s not something that you regularly thought about; you always made a mental note to get a new one but it always slipped your mind. It was never important enough for you to write down.
You try to say something—what, you don’t know—but your mouth is so dry that you hardly rasp out a single word. Beomgyu finally looks up, dark eyebrows angry and scowling, but as soon as your eyes meet, he melts. You see the hurt, confusion, and warmth flow through his face like waves onto a shore. He drops the keychain again, eyebrows furrowed and hands shaking.
What are you supposed to even say in this situation? You have no fucking idea.
That’s why you run. You squat down quickly to snatch your keys up, and then sprint for the front entrance. The doors are wide open, and you can see the pink and purple sunset, just out of reach. You don’t look back, and you’re soon you’re half running, half tripping down the staircase and then slipping on the dirt pathway all the way back to your house.
It’s stupid. It’s juvenile. It’s immature. Why did you run from him like a maniac? Why didn’t you just say hello and then goodbye like a normal person? No, now things were definitely going to be weird.
Sweat is running down your back when you finally get back to your house. It’s not a long walk, but even though the sun had now fully gone down, it was still hotter than ever. You forgot how nasty summers in your hometown could be.
Musty, muggy air surrounds you as you wipe your moist forehead with your wrist. You feel suffocated in your semi-fancy outfit, and your dress shoes are killing your feet. All you want is to get home, take a shower, and forget that you ever saw him.
So that’s what you do. You don’t tell anyone that you saw him, even though you know they’re wondering. Especially Yeonjun, who was so eager to pick you up from the school and hear all about the reunion. You can see it written across all their faces as you eat dinner together—while they ate, at least. You still felt so sick that all you did was pick at it with your fork and push things around on your plate.
Afterwards, you kiss Yeonjun on the forehead and slip out the door. It’s too early to go to sleep just yet, and you want some fresh air.
Now that the sun had fully gone away, the air had cooled more, but just a little. It was thick and warm, and the buzzing of mosquitoes and other pests hummed in your ears as you itched an already inflamed bite on your ankle. Fireflies danced close to the grass, the flashing yellow lights illuminating the dark blades. Distantly, you could hear big bullfrogs croaking and crickets chirping, and you knew that it came from the small stream that you and Beomgyu liked to mess around in way back when. You lost a sandal there once, you think.
The road from your house to your school started off as black asphalt, but later turned into a winding dirt path, carved by human feet alone, through a small thicket of trees fondly referred to as “the forest.” There were multiple ways to get there though; you and Beomgyu just liked this one best. You stand where dirt meets concrete, staring into the forest, and puffing on a cigarette, exhaling plumes of smoke floating up towards the massive full moon. It’s still too hot out, but you somehow feel more suffocated inside the house. Something about Yeonjun and your parents staring you down, their eyes practically begging to know what happened. You don’t need their damn sympathy, you just needed to chill the fuck out.
“Big city girl needs her nicotine fix?”
Somehow, you knew this would happen. A part of you knows that’s why you came out here tonight.
“Only when I’m stressed.” You purposely take an exaggerated, long drag.
“Because of me? I’m flattered.”
Beomgyu finally stands beside you, heels on the asphalt and toes brushing against the loose dirt. You refuse to look him in the eye. You refuse to look at him at all. The only light is from the moon and your lit cigarette, flashing reddish orange every time you breathed in.
“What do you want?” There’s no softness in your voice despite your opposing feelings inside. You drop the remains of your cigarette onto the dirt ground and stamp it out with your shoe, which you now realize are an old pair of Converse, worn down and caked with dirt.
And, complete with faded Sharpie scribbles made by you and the cocky bastard standing next to you.
“You ran away from me earlier.”
“That’s not what I asked.”
“You ran away from me ten years ago too.”
You groan loudly, wiping your face dramatically until the reds of your eyes showed. “I’m not doing this again,” you say, in a voice that’s much higher pitched than normal. You’re getting mad.
“What, you’re just gonna run away again? Very mature,” he said sarcastically. Your heart panged with hurt; there was venom in his words. Clearly, he was still hurting from you leaving. He hadn’t healed either.
“Say what you want to say, I’m only here until the end of the week anyways,” you snap.
Honestly, even though you’re still mad at him, a part of you still cares deeply for him, and it makes your throat tighten when you see the despair on his face. You know you did the right thing back then; leaving, and never talking to Beomgyu again. You never wanted to let him think that what he did was okay, and you knew that if you ever reached out to him and apologized he would assume that. Even so, there were so many nights where you sobbed into your pillow, restraining yourself from calling his number, not even knowing if he ever got a new one. Maybe that was another reason why you didn’t want to call; if you tried to call and couldn’t reach him, it’d be ten times more humiliating.
“You know I’m sorry, don’t you?” he asks quietly.
“Yeah, but that doesn’t make it okay,” you mumble, dejectedly. “Just because you said that you’re sorry, just because you are sorry, it doesn’t mean you didn’t try to purposely ruin my future. For selfish reasons too.”
He doesn’t reply for a minute, cocking his head to the side like he always used to do. Seeing him with his old mannerisms makes you feel sick.
“I know,” he says, choosing his words carefully. “I was a stupid kid. I didn’t want you to leave, even if it meant holding you back. It was so damn selfish, and I am so sorry.”
You swallow past the lump in your throat. “Okay. Thanks.” Again, Beomgyu doesn’t reply right away, and instead he turns to face you. The moonlight hits his face perfectly at this angle, and his features are lit up by the beams of silver. You can’t help but look over at him too, staring into his brown eyes that look completely black in the night. They’re so big and dark, but the moonlight reflects sparkles into them. Your scowl softens as you take in the slight signs of aging that you realize he’s beginning to show. His jawline is much more square now; his chin and nose slightly more prominent. There’s faint smile lines traced into his smooth skin, so light that you know you wouldn’t be able to see it in the daylight. The faintest whisper of stubble was only obvious on his chin, if you looked very closely. “Is that all you wanted to say to me?” you say finally, after what seemed like an eternity of you two staring into each other’s eyes.
“No,” he admitted. “There’s so much I want to say, but I’ll forget most of it before I even begin. But I missed you a lot. And I still love you a lot too.”
You wince at the declaration of his feelings, and you hope to any god out there that he means he still loves you as a friend, as someone he’s known for so long. But you know that isn’t what he means. You ask anyways.
“And by love… you mean…”
“I never stopped loving you,” he said fiercely, and his eyes look wet in the pale light. “I never will.”
“You’re crazy,” you say, but your voice cracks, and when you see Beomgyu’s pleading eyes finally spill over at the sound of emotion breaking through your rock solid facade, you shatter.
You’re leaking like a broken faucet; no sobs or cries, just silent tears streaming down your face non-stop. Beomgyu’s crying too, but he’s the opposite. His shoulders are shaking so hard from the force of holding his sobs in, and you can hear his little chokes as he swallows them down. Against your own better judgement, you mentally say fuck it, and walk over to him to take him in your arms.
You regret it and love it at the same time.
He smells just like he did back then; you can tell he uses the same cologne and it makes you smile into the top of his head, where your chin rests softly. And yes, the smell still makes your nostrils sting initially—but you find it doesn’t really bother you like it used to. His body against yours feels different physically but the same in memory. He’s broader, a little taller, a little more squishy now that he’s out of his teen boy phase where he grows faster than he can eat to catch up. But the way his hands clasp around your back, the way he buries his face in your neck, the shake of his left leg (you can tell he’s genuinely nervous because of this), it’s all the same.
You watch your own tears drip down into his red-brown hair, smoothing them away before they can soak in. You sit there on the asphalt in silence, stroking his soft hair and holding him close, as you both cry.
You almost press a quick kiss to the top of his head, but as soon as you look up you see Yeonjun standing there, flowery apron on and an oven mitt on one hand. Right, he’d been in the middle of baking dessert when you’d run out. You push Beomgyu away, a little too roughly, as Yeonjun looks the two of you up and down suspiciously. “Is that Beomgyu?” he asks sharply, and Beomgyu, upon hearing another man’s voice, turns around before you can even open your mouth to reply.
“I am. And who are you?” Beomgyu asks, rather rudely. You shove him again and stand up, walking over to Yeonjun and shaking your head. You bring your wrist up to your eyes and roughly wipe away any of the remaining tears. Yeonjun notices this and his expression softens as he bends down to try to look at your face.
“Hey, is everything okay?” he murmurs softly, rubbing your back gently. “This asshole didn’t try anything, did he?”
“What did you just call me?” Beomgyu asks loudly.
“I called you an asshole because that’s what you are,” Yeonjun snaps. He gently takes you by the arm so he can guide you back to the house, and you let him. “And just so you know, I’m Yeonjun, her fiancé. So fuck off.” He sends one last bone-chilling glare at Beomgyu before he wraps an arm around you and walks you back down the road. Beomgyu can see him leaning down to whisper in your ear, and he grits his teeth angrily, knowing that you’re both talking about him.
“It’s fine, Jun, really,” you say, between stuttered gasps for air. You’re crying again, harder this time. It’s embarrassing; you’re not sad, you’re angry.
“Are you sure? He didn’t try to pull anything? Promise?”
“Promise,” you choke out, and Yeonjun presses a swift kiss to your wet cheek as he closes the front door behind the two of you.
“Then… can I ask what was happening when I found you two?” he asks quietly.
You avert your eyes and stare at the ground. You’ve tracked in some dirt, and you know your mom will be pissy if you don’t clean it up before you go to bed. Yeonjun says your name, reaching over to tilt your chin up so you can look him in the eye.
“He started crying because he felt bad, so then I felt bad and… I just hugged him. He looked so pathetic.” You tell Yeonjun the truth, and he accepts it immediately. There’s no question about it; he trusts you completely.
“I’m sorry you had to go through that alone,” he says, sounding genuinely sorry that he wasn’t there with you. “I would have beat his ass.”
“And that’s why we walked away,” you said, laughing a little and wiping your teary eyes.
“That’s right,” he repeats, pulling you into a tight hug. An immense wave of guilt washes over you as you flinch; your first thought was something terrible.
You like Beomgyu’s hugs better, and you always have.
—
The next morning dawns hot and dry.
Unlike the previous day, in which the air held so much moisture you could feel your clothes clinging to your seemingly permanently damp body, this heat was unbearable in a different way.
You swear you can feel your skin cracking and drying as soon as you step into the direct sunlight, no matter how much sunscreen you apply. Heat waves are practically visible when you look outside; they’re distorting the image of the big tree in your backyard.
This morning, you’re sitting on your front porch with a paper plate and a steaming mug of coffee. On the paper plate is a blueberry streusel muffin; courtesy to your fiancé’s above average baking skills—and also the reason behind the flower-patterned apron he had been wearing when he came across you and Beomgyu having a weird emotional snot-fest. The muffin is a little soggy, as muffins tend to degrade to once they’ve been shut in a tupperware overnight, but the promise of a sweet treat first thing in the morning far outweighed the initial disappointment upon seeing a second morning muffin.
Chewing slowly, you dust off your streusel sticky hands, crumbs rolling off your palms and landing onto the peeling wood of your front porch. You watch one big crumb of streusel roll down the expanse of your thigh and down two, three steps until it lands in a patch of sunlight further down the stairs that lead to the street. It’s early enough in the morning that the sun isn’t directly overhead and therefore burning you as soon as you walk out the front door, and you’re grateful for the temporary shade. Your bare feet brush against the edge of the shadows, toes dipping into light and spreading across the sun warmed wood.
It’s a gloriously individual morning, and you breathe in the smell of trees and warm grass. If only you could freeze this moment in time and revisit it whenever you wanted. If only you had such an escape that you could return to when times got tough.
But really, that morning is the only peaceful part of your day. You’re arguing with your co-worker on the phone as soon as you down your last sip of coffee, which had by then cooled into a lukewarm liquid. You hate the last few gulps of a hot drink, because there is nothing worse than a lukewarm drink that’s meant to be hot. Then, irritable from your row with Jeongin, who fucked up your entire project and needed help restoring a few very simple documents, paired with the misery of living in a house with no AC during the hottest, driest summer months, you end up being snappy with Yeonjun.
Also, your mother made your least favorite dish for dinner, and as much as you appreciated your parents for cooking for you, there was no way in hell you were eating it.
Stomach growling, head aching, and fingers sore from furious emailing (thanks to Jeongin), you curl up on your side in bed. Your hair is still damp from your recent shower, and your face is shiny and a little sore from you taking out your anger on your face when you were washing it.
You’re plucking at a piece of your hair, just toying with it mindlessly, when you feel the edge of your bed dip down as someone sits on it. You freeze, sucking your bottom lip into your mouth to chew on it nervously until you taste blood.
“Long day, huh?” Yeonjun asked softly. You scoot over a little to let him lay next to you, but you don’t turn to look at him. He sidles in carefully, leaving just a little space between your bodies in case you’re not comfortable with too much contact tonight. You shrug in response, the only sound being your t-shirt brushing against your bed sheets as your shoulders move up and down in place of real words.
“I was just annoyed, and everything piled up so quickly after I had to fix Jeongin’s shit.” You spit out Jeongin’s name like it’s poisonous, and Yeonjun can’t help but chuckle at your petty behavior.
“He’s a kid,” he chided, “but he is a pretty dumb one, at that. I thought young people were supposed to be good with technology.”
“Doesn’t apply to clueless idiots,” you mumble, your words muffled from your lips being pressed to your pillowcase.
“It’s been a long few days for you, hasn’t it?” he asked, forgetting about Jeongin and his antics. “Are you sure you don’t wanna fly home early?”
Home. Fly home. Right, this wasn’t home any more, even though you always referred to it as that. I’m going home for Christmas. This girl I knew from back home got married last month. My hometown is a wasteland and I never want to go back. But I don’t want to lose it, either.
“I’m okay,” you start, and you can just picture Yeonjun’s doubtful frown without turning to look at his face. “Fine, I will be okay once this is all wrapped up and over with. It’s a stressful time but it’s something I have to do. I had to come back to my high school reunion for closure. I had to at least see Beomgyu one last time. I had to help my parents clean and sell the house.” You’re laying it out for him, word by word, and he pays attention to your intonation and serious tone, moving a little closer so that he could rest his head right next to yours. His nose poked the back of your scalp as he inhaled the scent of your shampoo, and underneath that, the scent of you.
You swallow hard, feeling all of the anger from your long, stressful day melt away. Yeonjun’s steady breathing and complete attention to your stupid rant had calmed you. Silently, you both stare up at the warm-toned walls, washed with a dim yellow light from the small lamp on your nightstand, the only light in the house left on at the moment. It was late, past midnight, and you two were the only two souls in the house that were awake.
Holding your breath, you slowly move closer to Yeonjun until your bodies are pressed so tightly to each other that you couldn’t wedge a single finger between where you two were connected. He breathes in harshly at the feeling of your hips connecting, flexing his hands into fists to try and control himself. Then, with a shaking hand, you reach over to find him, and once your fingers brush against his, you slip your hand into his hold. His fingers are warm, soft, familiar. Especially from the past few days of moving heavy objects. You bring your intertwined hands up to your chest, and then they part—you press his newly free hand against your breast, letting him feel your hardened, sensitive nipple. He groans softly, deeply, into your hair as he thumbs at the hardened nub over the thin material of your shirt.
You exhale, happy that he seems to have missed you as much as you missed him.
Now you feel his hard length pressed up against your backside, grinding roughly into you and making you slick with anticipation, though you were both still fully clothed. Momentarily, he let go of your tit, and before you could whisper a question he slipped his hand underneath your shirt to grope at them freely, without any barriers. He’s breathing heavier now, soft grunts escaping his lips ever now and then. You’re holding back a whimper as he sucks hickies onto your neck, his hot tongue making you squirm.
All in one quick fumble, you’re facing him now and your lips are pressed to his. Your neck is stinging from his teeth, your nipples burning from his calloused fingers pinching and teasing. Worst of all, your clothed cunt, grinding against Yeonjun’s hard muscular thigh, which he had pressed roughly between your legs as soon as you turned to face him, gasping.
You feel your teeth knock against his as you choke down a moan when your clit nudges against his thigh just right, and he reaches up with one hand to grab your throat gently, just enough to get your attention. He shushes you, and you whimper quietly as his fingers move up from your throat to inside your mouth. You swirl your tongue around the digits, sucking them deeper into your mouth, eager to please as you stare at his gorgeous face, half hidden in the shadows. His lips are swollen and red in the limited light, his eyes hooded and dark as he stares at you sucking on his fingers, desperate and longing. You haven’t felt this way in a long time. When was the last time you wanted to please a man this badly?
Yeonjun pulls his fingers out of your mouth, staring at the string of saliva that connects them to your bottom lip momentarily before it inevitably breaks, and then he reaches down into your pants, spit soaked fingers expertly finding your clit, as they have done for years and years. He knows everything about your body, and better yet, everything about your mind that makes your body react.
He’s going to give it to you exactly how you like it, exactly like he’s done for years and years. He’s never let you down before, and he isn’t planning on it now, even when it’s in your childhood bedroom.
He winks at you before ducking under the covers, and you feel his hands grabbing at the waistband of your pants. You lift up your ass, letting him remove your shorts and panties at the same time, and finally, you feel his warm breath tickling your inner thighs as he leans in.
He presses sloppy, wet kisses down your thighs as he works his way to the center, and finally you feel his fingers teasing you with light touches, poking and prodding just to get on your nerves a little so that you’ll pull his hair the way he likes it. And that you do, tangling your fingers in his brown locks as he smiles into your cunt, your wetness dripping down his chin.
Yeonjun reappears once he’s done his job, so well that you had to stuff your fist into your mouth when you came so that you didn’t wake up your parents with the loudest, most pornographic moan you’ve ever uttered. Your legs are shaking as he emerges from between your legs, your slick making his lips and chin glisten in the light. You reach up to grab him by the shirt, dragging him down to you so that you can taste yourself on his swollen, pouty lips. It’s salty, a little bitter and musky, and you can smell it all over his face as you messily make out with him, lips sliding over each other as you fumble with the bottom of his shirt to try and tug it up. Feeling your cold hands on his stomach, he reluctantly stops kissing you to rip it off his body, tossing it onto the floor with a flourish. It joins the pile of clothes on the floor, alongside your shorts and panties, which had made their way closer and closer to the edge of the bed before finally just falling in a sad heap, forgotten about in the heat of the moment.
You watch his muscles flex in the dim light as he tosses his shirt onto the floor, your eyes glowing with lust. He dives back in; kissing you like it’s the last time he’ll be able to taste your lips as he fumbles with his pants. You part once more to rid yourself of the remaining clothing items clinging to your bodies; your shirt and his pants.
You’re already reaching over with a spit soaked hand to grab at his dick before he even gets the chance to toss his boxers on the floor, and he sharply inhales at the feeling of you sliding your slick hand over his cock head. You feel it twitch under your touch and giggle. The effect that you have on him has never dimmed; you are the most gorgeous person in the world to him.
Before you and Yeonjun had officially gotten together, you had just been friends. He was two years older than you, an upperclassman already, and he didn’t want to hold you back with a relationship as soon as you got to school. No matter how much he liked you, he kept his distance just a little as he watched you grow and change as a person in those first few months as an adult. In this time, you managed to rack up a few sexual experiences, some better than others, all being below average at best.
It was hooking up, that’s all it was. That’s the only kind of sex that you had, the only kind that you thought existed. Fucking. Hooking up. Having sex. Such plain, brash terms.
Then, you were with Yeonjun.
Fucking had a different meaning with him. There was affection, an underlying softness even when he was being rough, an overflow of love pouring from his heart into yours every time he was inside of you. It made you feel weird at first, and you actually avoided him for a bit after you started crying during one heated night due to feeling so safe in his arms. It was so new that you got scared; you thought it was wrong.
It wasn’t just fucking any more, you later thought, he was making love to you. It was as simple as that. You had previously thought that fucking, having sex, making love, hooking up—it was all pretty much the same thing; they were all synonymous terms. No, the difference with Yeonjun was that he made love to you, and that was the missing puzzle piece in your previously deeply unsatisfying sex life.
You knew that this is what he was doing now, especially tonight when you were both feeling so vulnerable. His lips hardly leave yours, save for when one of you needs to take a gasping breath, and his hands roam your body, embracing and worshiping every single part of you. It’s driving you crazy, as you’re doing nothing but kissing though you can feel his hard cock brushing against your weeping slit every time he leans forward. To remedy this, you wrap your legs around his waist to pull him closer to you. Now he’s grinding against you, his length pulsating against your cunt with every movement either of you make.
“Please Jun, please just do it already,” you whine, over and over, crying in his ear.
He teases you endlessly, stuttering his hips to make your breath catch in your throat, smirking at your visceral reactions to him. In the middle of your begging, he angles his hips differently, and his head slips into you, a breathy moan leaving your lips. He bites down hard on his lower lip, resisting the urge to groan aloud and slap your tit to see it jiggle, and pushes the rest of his cock in, warmth enveloping him as he closes his eyes.
Your hands scrabble for something to hold onto, and his shaking hands find your flailing ones. He grips your hand tightly, pinning it above your head as he rocks his hips into you. The covers slip off of his narrow hips at the slow, constant thrusts, exposing all of you in the light. You look down to see where you’re connected, see the ring of your slick around the base of his shiny cock, and throw your head back with a whine as he pushes into you particularly roughly.
Yes, sex with Yeonjun is always full of passion, full of love. It elevates the experience for you, when you feel so deeply and wholly for the person that you’re having relations with.
You can’t help but pull him in for another kiss when he chokes out a quick warning, words spilling from his trembling lips. You’ve orgasmed twice already, from Yeonjun putting off his own orgasm in order to make sure you achieve yours. His neglected cock, edged multiple times, was red and leaking copious amounts of precum by the time his trembling hand directed it back inside of your swollen pussy after your second high.
You feel warmth erupt from his cock as he cries into the kiss, unable to tamp down the soft groans that escape his lungs. Slick, wet sounds are the only thing you can hear apart from the both of your labored breathing, as he keeps thrusting his softening cock inside. You feel his cum leaking down your ass cheeks, and your cunt clenches around him as he stills inside of you.
Somehow, the two of you fall asleep like that. It’s just so warm and fuzzy and sticky, and you’re so tired that when he lays his sweaty face in your chest, you close your eyes and don’t open them again until the early hours of the morning, when you feel like you’re about to piss yourself.
You leave Yeonjun in the cum-stained bed; it’s still just past two in the morning, but you know you won’t be able to fall back asleep now. At least, not while there’s rivulets of dried semen down your inner thighs and you smell like a mixture of saliva and sweat. After you flush the toilet, you stare at the reflection of your hickey covered neck in the mirror hanging on your wall, pressing against one lightly with your pointer finger and grimacing at the purple color. It’d be a bitch to try and cover. You want to shower again so badly, but first you need a smoke. You find a half empty box of stale cigarettes in your purse and a gas station lighter on your nightstand, and you open your window and step out onto the roof.
It’s a cool night. Your bare feet and legs—you only put on Yeonjun’s shirt and a fresh pair of panties when you woke up—scrape against the rough surface of the roof tiles. You’re clutching the box of cigarettes so hard you think you might have dented a few of them. Balancing one between your lips, you light it and inhale deeply, tossing the lighter down and leaning back before exhaling. You watch the exhaled smoke rise up to the dark sky before eventually dissipating.
“I seriously think you have a problem,” a disapproving voice states, and you curse aloud, almost dropping the lit cigarette off the roof as you sit up.
Again, Beomgyu stands there, looking wounded. “Why the fuck are you here?” you ask. Suddenly, the way that you’re dressed makes you extremely uncomfortable. Beomgyu seems to notice this too, eyes following the length of your bare legs, disappearing beneath the oversized shirt you have on. With disappointment, he realizes this is probably Yeonjun’s shirt covering your body. This is quickly remedied when you sit up in annoyance and he catches a flash of your panties underneath. He feels like a teenage boy when a simple glimpse of white panties makes his cock twitch in his pants.
“I wanted to be an adult and say I’m sorry,” he says indignantly, offended at your violent tone.
“At one in the morning?” You scoff, stubbing out your cigarette on the roof tiles even though it’s only half-gone. You don’t feel like smoking any more, not with Beomgyu’s judgemental eyes on you.
“He get you into that shit?”
“Jesus, Gyu,” you snap.
“Fine, fine! I don’t care. I’m sorry.” His lithe figure, bathed in moonlight, moves closer to you, but with a slight caution. You know he isn’t completely sure how you feel about him.
“Just sit down already.”
He sits.
“You called me Gyu again.”
His voice sounds thick, pained. You habitually reach up and touch your chapped, kiss-swollen lips. You hadn’t even noticed that the old nickname slipped out; it felt so natural to say even though it had been so long since you had. The closest you came to saying any variation of your ex best friend’s name was the silent mouthing of the vowels and consonants that made up one of the most beautiful names you’ve ever heard. The loneliest nights, mostly the ones that you struggled through right after you moved away, were spent with the ghost of his name on your lips. You were too cowardly to go any further, as if the simple singular utterance of his name might summon him from across the country and into your dorm room. The wound was so fresh that even the made-up version of Beomgyu that came with the memories was too much for you to bear.
“Remember all the nights we’d come out here and just look at the stars?” he asks suddenly, and all of a sudden you truly feel eighteen and heartsick again—staring up into the dark void of nothingness above you, rendering you and Beomgyu smaller than the tiniest ant, nothing more than two less than microscopic specks on such a vast planet.
“Yeah,” you manage to get out, though your voice sounds oddly strained.
“The night before you left—the last time I saw you—I was looking at the stars and thinking of us.” He laughs a little, and you can’t help but turn to look at him, your dry eyes burning with the possibility of tears. You’re on your side now, facing him; he’s still laying flat on his back with his hands clasped behind his head. His eyes are locked on the night sky, so focused that he doesn’t even realize that the girl he loves is staring at him with tears in her eyes. “And then, you just appeared. It was like I manifested you. You looked fake in the moonlight too.”
“Fake?”
“Yeah, you almost didn’t look like yourself. You were wearing this dress, a floaty looking one with flowers, and you looked so pretty that I thought I was imagining you standing in front of me. I thought I made it all up, until I grabbed your hand and you were warm and solid and real.” Now he turns to look at you and realizes that you’re facing him, paying full attention to his rambling. Slowly, he mirrors your pose, turning to look at you. Your faces were close enough now that if you both leaned in, you’d kiss. The very thought of that makes your stomach turn—with anticipation or dread, you’re unsure.
“Like now.” He whispers this last part, before looking down and taking your hand in his gently. His hands are different from Yeonjun’s; instead of being smooth and soft, they are dry and calloused. You can see how years of work in his dad’s old shop has taken a toll on his poor hands; the days where his hands were young and clean were long gone. You hold his hand up to your face to study it closer, to memorize each little line and freckle so that when you left for the last time you could remember exactly what Choi Beomgyu’s hand looked like, exactly how it felt to hold. Years from now, you will be sick and dying in bed, and you will wonder if the pale, slight freckles on the back of his hand will disappear amongst dozens of age spots. Will his fingers gnarl and twist like his grandfather’s did, falling victim to arthritis? Will his nails grow thick and yellow, like so many other elders’ do? You take in the cracked fingertips, the dirt and oil under his nails.
“Like now?” you ask thickly.
He nods, head slightly bobbing up and down. It was so subtle that you almost didn’t catch it, instead focusing on his full lips and how they glistened. How was it possible for a man to have such perfect, delicate features? You’d never seen anyone so pretty in your life. There’s something about seeing a beautiful man in the middle of the night; the moonlight will illuminate their face in a completely different way than sunlight does. It will make you see an entirely new side of him, and it will only make you fall deeper in love with this unattainable, gorgeous boy. Once you see a beautiful boy in the moonlight, you will never be able to forget about them, and this is when you know that you will never be able to let Choi Beomgyu go. More time could elapse—ten, fifteen, twenty more years—and you’d still think of him too often for it to be normal. You’d still hope that one day, you get another chance to try things again.
That is how you find yourself kissing Choi Beomgyu, nothing but a single pane of glass separating the two of you and your sleeping fiancé.
His lips are slightly chapped. They’re warm, but his tongue is hot and wet as it glides across your lips, begging you to open your mouth. You do so after only a brief hesitance, sighing a little into his mouth as he cautiously puts a hand on your waist. The feeling of his hands on you seems to snap you out of your daze, and you quickly pull away from him, sitting back up and looking at the window, panicked. It’s still dark. No one is awake but you and Beomgyu.
He reaches for your hand again. “Are you okay?” he asks. It’s a stupid question, you think—you just cheated on your loving, perfect fiancé—and he’s asking if you’re fine? Of course, he’s guilt-free in this—Yeonjun’s feelings mean nothing to him.
“I just can’t do this. Not while he’s sleeping right there.” You look away, guilt already melting away as you stare into Beomgyu’s gorgeous eyes. It’s like you forget all about Yeonjun as long as Beomgyu’s there in his place.
Beomgyu ponders your words for a moment, looking off into the distance and pursing his lips. “Then… let’s go somewhere else.”
You bite your tongue. Somewhere else?
“And that means…?” you ask.
“I know a place,” he says mysteriously. “Do you trust me?”
You know you do before you even say it. Before the incident, there was no one you trusted more than Beomgyu. And even after the incident, you know that you would be safe with him.
You quickly climb back into your room and snatch up a pair of shorts that are laying on the floor, pulling them on so that you’re not walking around in your panties. You also slip on some shoes, the first comfortable pair you see.
After you climb back out the window and shut it as quietly as possible, he motions for you to follow him. He shimmies down the side of your house, whispering directions to you when you try to mimic his moves. You slip a little more than halfway down, your panicked scream catching in your throat, reducing it to little more than an exhale, but you land in strong, firm arms. Beomgyu rolls his eyes at your clumsiness, not the least bit phased, but you have to calm your rapidly beating heart before you even think to thank him.
You feel a new fire burning in your chest, the thrill of doing something so daring, so wrong, waking up your hibernating rebellious side. You’re reminded of other moonlit walks you had with Beomgyu, years and years ago. You snuck out the same way, through your bedroom window—you just didn’t fall halfway down.
It’s only when you’re more than halfway there that you realize where Beomgyu is leading you. He helps you across a shallow stream, telling you which rocks are safe to step on and which are slick with damp moss, and then a memory pops back into your head. You land safely on the dirt ground, clutching Beomgyu’s hand, and you grin. “Are we going to Thomas?”
Thomas—the nickname that you and Beomgyu gave to the abandoned boxcar in a clearing in the woods. At the time, you were regularly babysitting a child in the neighborhood, who was obsessed with the animated show about a talking train named Thomas. For a few months, you and Beomgyu watched a little more of the show than you’d like to ever admit. You also both enjoyed it more than you’d like to admit. But something that you were more than happy to admit, you now had a good code name for the train car in the woods.
“You still remember!” he exclaims. “I was starting to think you seriously forgot about him.”
“I did, until we crossed the stream,” you admitted. “It’s been a while.”
“It really has,” he agrees, “since when, junior year of high school?”
“Something like that.”
You only have to walk a little longer before the trees thin out, and you spot the faded old car on the other end of the small clearing. You take Beomgyu’s hand, and you both run over, laughing openly and bumping into each other playfully. He boosts you up into the car first, and then hoists himself up and sits beside you.
The door had been ripped off the car since you’d found it, and it was now covered in moss and broken down into splinters behind the structure. This meant that there was a section of the car that was lit up by the moonlight, so you weren’t stuck in complete darkness. That was where you and Beomgyu sat, legs hanging over the edge, until he nudged you and got up, walking further inside the car until he sat down at the far end, motioning for you to come inside. You follow him, kneeling beside him, heart hammering in your chest as he slowly takes your hands.
“Can I kiss you again?” he asks quietly.
You swallow hard, but nod. You shut your eyes tightly before your lips collide, but as soon as he’s kissing you again you don’t care any more—there’s no more hesitation. You’re bringing his hands to your chest eagerly, sucking his tongue into your mouth.
He pushes you down, so that your back is flat on the floor of the car, and he’s slotted between your legs. He’s groping your tits over your shirt, pressing his knee into your cunt.
You pull out of the kiss, opening your eyes and studying him. His lips are swollen now, and he’s panting. “I want to see you,” you whisper.
“Then look,” he says sassily, cocking his head to the side, shifting his bangs into his eyes.
“No,” you whine softly, “I want to see all of you.”
He holds his breath once he realizes what you mean. You watch intently as he slowly sits back on his heels, taking off every item of clothing carefully. You do the same, making a neat pile so that you don’t lose anything.
You’ve seen him shirtless before, when you’d go to the pool or he’d change his shirt in front of you on the occasion. But now, he looked different. He’s more muscular, more solid. He’s still slim, but it’s clear that he’s worked on his body and grown into it more over the years. You can’t take your eyes off of him as he takes off his pants, gaze fixated on the bulge in his boxers. He flushes a dark pink when he follows your eyes, and gets back between your legs, staring at your naked tits. Your nipples are stiff in the cool night air, and he gently tweaks one of them, smiling when you inhale sharply.
“Is this okay?” he asks, when his mouth is an inch away from your breast. His warm breath ghosts over your skin, and you moan quietly, nodding and pushing your chest against his lips. He sucks your nipple into his mouth, grazing his teeth against it, and you can’t help but place a hand on the back of his head and lean into his mouth.
When he’s done admiring your tits, which he’s dreamed about for years, he places wet kisses down your body, until he reaches the band of your panties. “Okay?” he asks again, just as his fingertips curl underneath the elastic.
“Yes, please,” you gasp, and he pulls them down your thighs, tossing them into the pile of clothes in the corner. He places his hands on your knees, spreading your legs, eager to see you. He leans down, parting your glistening lips in the moonlight, and feeling prideful—you’re wet because of him. He did this, not Yeonjun.
It seems that the differences between Beomgyu and Yeonjun keep growing—the two of them eat pussy differently too.
Beomgyu’s messy with it, spit already dripping down your cunt and down his chin. He’s rough too, pressing his tongue against your clit until your thighs are shaking uncontrollably. His soft hair curls around your fingers as you pull his head closer to your cunt.
You cum, surprisingly harder than you have in a while. You’re whining and bucking your hips into his face, until he finally lifts his face. His lips and chin are wet, and he has a shit-eating grin on his face.
“What?” you ask, suddenly embarrassed at the way he’s staring you down.
“You’re so hot,” he sighs, and you feel yourself blushing at his genuine glee.
“Whatever,” you mumble, suppressing a giggle, but he doesn’t stop smiling to himself as he takes off his boxers.
You think it’s completely, wholly unfair how beautiful he looks naked.
Something about his skin makes him look extra luminous in the moonlight that washes over his body in pale stripes, slipping through the slats of the wooden walls and pouring in through the door frame. His auburn-brown hair looks dark cherry red in the limited light, so different from the fine black hairs that litter his arms, legs, and stomach. This is where your gaze dips lower, towards the one part of Beomgyu you’d never seen before.
His cock, hard and leaking, twitches as he feels you staring. You’re impressed—but really, you weren’t expecting to be disappointed. You’ve never seen him naked before, but you weren’t an idiot. After seeing him in his swim trunks that last summer, you couldn’t help but bring that image to mind whenever your fingers traveled beneath the elastic band of your panties. You swallow hard as he drops back down, hovering over you. He’s breathing heavily, nervously, as he tries to decipher the unassuming expression on your face.
“I hope I’m not disappointing you,” he can’t help but blurt out, not thinking straight.
You wrap your arms around his neck and pull his face close to yours again, kissing him long and deep. He melts into your embrace, quickly reciprocating your excitement. You feel the head of his dick nudge against your slit as he moves closer, and you unconsciously buck your hips up, slipping it inside for just a moment. You both shudder at the sudden closeness, the sensation of being closer than you ever have before, and you part—he stares so deeply into your eyes that you swear he’s staring at your soul. You feel more naked than ever; it surpasses your physical body. You’ve exposed your loves, your fears, your darkest secrets and the skeletons in your closet, before baring your tangible nudity—something you’d never done before.
His eyes drop to your neck and chest, and the adoring fuzzy gaze disappears as he takes in the dark marks left by Yeonjun. His hold on your hips tighten, so hard that you’re gasping from the tingling mixture of pain and pleasure, and he attacks the same spot on the side of your neck, the same one that Yeonjun had been nibbling at as he worked you through an orgasm. It’s sore, swollen—the skin is hot to the touch and bruised already, but Beomgyu’s hard teeth reignite the pain ten times over as he roughly rubs your clit. You cry out, thighs squeezing his hand as you come again, feeling over sensitive already.
He positions himself at your entrance, looking up to you for confirmation. Your chest is heaving as you pant, still woozy from your orgasm, but you know you won’t be wholly satisfied until you feel him completely. This time, you need him in a way you have never had him. You nod, and he reaches up to clasp your hand above your head, rough fingers pinning you to the wooden floor.
He enters you in one fluid motion, so smooth you don’t register it until he’s fully sheathed inside and the two of you let out a simultaneous deep groan.
“Does he fuck you as good as I do?” Beomgyu can’t help but spit out between moans, slamming his hips into yours so roughly that the slap of skin on skin echoes around the empty car.
You’re getting annoyed at how you keep comparing Beomgyu to Yeonjun, so when his thrusts differ from your fiancé’s too, you completely block the thought of your loving partner out of your head. You forget that he’s asleep in your childhood bedroom, cuddling with your favorite stuffed animal, surrounded by the smell of you. You forget that it’s too late to ever go back, to ever regain what has been broken. And you forget that you ever hated Beomgyu, because it was hard to hate him when your mind was so clouded by lust you couldn’t think of anyone else.
The last thing you think about before you fall asleep in the early hours of the morning with another man’s cum leaking out of your sore cunt, is how angelic Beomgyu’s face looked when he filled you up. It made you want to wrap your legs around his narrow waist and let him fuck it into you, so that he would never be apart from you again. You never wanted to see another face ever again, after you saw his delicate features scrunched up in pleasure.
You’re so exhausted by your sneaking around, so sore from the splinters and scrapes, that you curl up right next to Yeonjun without showering off your night.
It’s a pity, that when Yeonjun wakes, long before you do, he doesn’t suspect a thing when he sees a twig clinging to the back of your shirt, or fresh mud on an old pair of your shoes. He trusts you, so wholeheartedly, that he pressed kisses on top of your exposed hickies—though not without noticing that they looked a lot darker than they did the last time he saw them.
—
“Excuse us, ma’am!” Two children—no older than ten and twelve—squeeze past you in the crowded aisle, the younger one brushing against a box of uncooked pasta and knocking it to the ground. Without a glance backwards, they speed off towards a tired looking couple with a shopping cart full of sugary cereal and cheap plastic toys. It’s then that you register the name that one of the kids called you, and you’re disgruntled—do you really look that old? You catch a glimpse of yourself on the reflective surface of a colorful advertisement standee, and frown at your appearance, feeling older and more out of place than ever.
You toss a box of uncooked pasta into your cart and go forth, braving the chilly aisles of the grocery store without your jacket, which you stupidly left in the car, thinking that you’d be fine. You make a mental note to never trust the temperature again.
As you’re studying the nearly identical packages of grapes, a pale hand reaches for the same bag you were going for. The both of you spring back, surprised, and you lock eyes with Karina.
“Oh!” you exclaim. You try to make yourself say hello, but there’s already been an awkward silence after your surprised outburst.
She smiles, unaffected, and says, “Hello, (Y/N). How have you been?”
Damn her perfect ability to navigate a conversation.
“Hey, Karina!” you say, crossing your arms to try and mimic a comfortable position. “I’ve been good! Just busy, moving and stuff, you know. What about you?”
She laughs, the same delicate laugh that makes your stomach jump with excitement, before replying. “I’m good too! Trying to soak up the last few weeks of summer, then everything starts up again. This place really revolves around the kids, you know? When school starts again, it feels like the whole town just wakes up after a long sticky summer nap.” She pauses. “Oh, I’m rambling.” A little embarrassed even though you’re clearly not offended, she places a delicate hand over her chest. A pretty silver ring sparkles on her fourth finger.
You shake your head, assuring her that it’s fine, that she’s right anyways, but you’re staring at her ring the whole time. She notices, gaze following yours and quickly flickering down to her hand, and smiles broadly. “Oh! Did I tell you last time? I’m married now!” she exclaims. Her cheeks are pink, flushed with excitement. Clearly, she was very happy in her relationship, eager to talk about it. The very thought of your own relationship now made a rock appear in your stomach—a heavy, dark, massive boulder that weighed you down and made you sick.
“Congratulations!” you say, and you both share a little moment right there in the fruit and vegetable aisle—it makes you miss your girl friends from back home, and you again wonder if it would have been possible to be friends with Karina way back when. If that would have made things different. Better, even.
“Thank you, thank you.” She looks down, trying to hide her wide smile, and brushes a long lock of her dark hair behind her ear. “He’s the best.”
“That’s sweet, I’m really happy for you,” you say, and you find that you actually really mean it. You exchange goodbyes as the conversation naturally trails off, and head off in opposite directions—both of you carrying a bag of grapes, neither one being the initial same choice.
As soon as you get into the car and place your hands on the steering wheel, your phone starts ringing, and you groan and reach over to fumble around in your purse for the vibrating device.
“Hello?” you ask, answering the call, which you now see is from Yeonjun. You feel the rock in your stomach press down harder on the sensitive walls of your stomach lining, and you wince.
“Hey, babe,” he coos, “are you on your way back yet?”
“Yeah, just finished grocery shopping,” you say honestly, propping your purse back up. You work on tossing the mess back into the open mouth of the bag; you ended up spilling an expired container of Tic-Tacs all over the passenger seat when you tried to feel around for your phone.
“Good! I was thinking that maybe we could go on a drive tonight?”
You freeze up, a handful of fruit flavored mints falling from your hand. “Why?” you ask carefully.
“No reason, I just… I guess I just miss spending time with you alone,” he confesses. “As much as I love your parents, and this place, it’s not the same. I’m excited for us to go back home, and for things to go back to normal.”
Your heart aches at the melancholy, tired voice on the other end of the line. “We leave soon, babe,” you assure him, “we’re almost done here.”
“I know, I know—I’m sorry, I’m complaining. This is a lot for you, I shouldn’t be wrapped up in my own feelings.”
“No, no! I understand, I do, and I miss you too. Look, the drive sounds good. I’ll be back soon, and as soon as I finish putting the groceries away we can leave. Does that sound okay?” Your grip on the phone tightens, and you feel guilty. If not for the complete betrayal, then because you’d genuinely been neglecting him since you got home too.
“Yes, it does.” He sounds content, relieved even, and you smile to yourself as you say goodbye and hang up. You place your hands back on the steering wheel, and take a deep breath as you head home, away from Mr. Kim’s grocery store—which is now owned by his son. Another small change, another thing that makes you feel like you never knew this town in the first place.
Outside, the sun is setting. Orange and pink bleed through your cracked windows, painting warm stripes across your body. The air is warm and thick, almost soupy from the humidity, but it feels familiar and comforting.
Yeonjun is baking again when you return, the same flowered apron that’s too short on his lanky frame tied in a messy pink bow at his back. He’s pulling a tray of cookies out of the oven when you push the door open, hands full of groceries.
“Welcome back!” he exclaims, quickly putting down the cookies to rush to your aid. Gratefully, you hand off a few bags. Yeonjun bustles around the vanilla scented kitchen, putting things away quickly as you dust off your hands and sneak a cookie from the tray. Sweetness floods across your tongue as you bite into one. It’s still a little too warm, the center burning your tongue a tad and the rest of the treat falling apart in your hands. “They’re not cooled yet!” he scolds, finally noticing your struggle.
“Couldn’t help it, they looked too good,” you say around a mouthful of cookie, and he rolls his eyes before walking over and planting a peck on your messy lips.
“I’ll finish up here, you do what you need to do,” he says, kneeling down to sift through the remaining few bags. He shoos you away as you cram the rest of the cookie into your mouth, giggling.
Really, you don’t need to go off and do anything. You already had everything in your purse. So all you did was check your reflection quickly before walking back into the kitchen, where Yeonjun has finished putting the groceries away and is hanging up the beloved frilly apron.
“Ready?” he asks.
“Sure am.”
He grins, wraps an arm around your shoulders like he always does, and presses a kiss to your temple. The two of you don’t bother to close the windows or lock the door, because it’s a small town where everyone knows everyone. It’s still a bit unnerving for Yeonjun, who has always lived in the city. He was brought up sternly, always told by his parents that if he ever left a door unlocked or a window open, someone evil would surely get in. And in the city, that’s not too far of an assumption. That was probably Yeonjun’s least favorite part about you—if he had to choose. Though you were much better about it now, for the longest time he saw you as a little country mouse lost in a big city. You would leave the door of your dorm room open all day after leaving for class. You would often leave the windows unlocked overnight. One warm autumn evening while going out for dinner with some friends, you left your window completely open and Yeonjun was the one that found the intruder under your bed. To be fair, the intruder was a rather chunky squirrel who didn’t have the gymnastic ability to hurl himself back up onto the window ledge, but still. You remember all of this fondly, as you watch Yeonjun double check that the front door is closed in the rear view mirrors before pulling away from your house.
The sun seemed to be taking its sweet time, wanting to give a magnificent show to anyone who spared the time to watch. You stare down at the small clouds of reddish dirt being spit up by the wheels of your car, then refocus your attention on the splendid landscape before you. The warmth of the setting sunlight bled golden everywhere, turning the green grass a springy hazy shade and shining rays of sparkles onto any moving creature. A pair of songbirds flew by quickly, twittering and warbling a good night song as golden light danced across their waxy feathers. You squint at the tree that the birds have landed in, and you gasp as you recognize it. “Jun,” you plead, “can we stop by the blackberry bushes? It’s just the right time to pick them.”
“Blackberry bushes?” Yeonjun exclaims, “you don't have to tell me twice.”
“You sound like my dad when you say stuff like that,” you groan as he pulls off to the side of the road.
“I am honored. He is a fine gentleman,” Yeonjun insists goofily, watching you with adoring eyes as you leap out of the car and into the meadow.
“It’s just past this tree,” you claim, pointing to the very same tree that the two birds landed in earlier. “I used to come here with—I used to come here all the time,” you said, stumbling over your words. Your mouth feels dirty, almost saying Beomgyu’s name aloud, and in front of Yeonjun too.
If Yeonjun notices, he doesn’t say anything about it. He lets you lead him past the tree with the gnarled bark and further into a thicket of younger trees. Your grasp on his hand tightens as you spot the patch of bushes, their branches heavy with fruit. You bound ahead, letting go of his hand and plucking a few large berries, the dark juices staining your fingertips. Yeonjun walks up beside you, pulling a large handkerchief out of his pocket and holding it out to you. You pile on blackberries immediately, knowing that was why he was offering it.
“Your lips are purple,” Yeonjun says accusingly, using his free hand to point at your face. You feel your cheeks heat up slightly; you’re embarrassed for acting so juvenile and stuffing your face with blackberries.
“And yours aren’t,” you say in the same tone. His eyes flicker from your lips then back to your eyes. You feel your heartbeat speed up as he gently sets the handkerchief of berries down on the soft grass before scooping you into his arms and pressing his lips to yours.
“So sweet,” he murmurs against your purple lips jokingly.
“I told you it was blackberry season,” you retort, giggling as you feel him squeeze your hips.
You keep the handkerchief of blackberries in your lap for the rest of the ride, crying out when Yeonjun would reach over and slap your fingers away as you tried to sneak another berry into your mouth. “I want to use those in some scones!” he insisted playfully.
The lightheartedness of the banter and the gorgeous golden light painting your hometown in nostalgia was an escape. It was almost like you were back home with Yeonjun in your apartment, looking back on fond memories you shared together. The setting outside your window looked fake because of the dreamy haze, and you wished you could freeze in this perfect moment with the perfect man. Everything in the snapshot would be perfect; it wouldn’t capture the thoughts that plagued your mind as soon as you stepped out of the car and looked up at your childhood home. Guilt, pain, and hurt bloomed in your chest as Yeonjun parked the car and took you by the waist, so that the two of you could walk back inside together. You masked the guilt of another man’s touch behind a smile, but it didn’t last long. As soon as you looked up, your blood ran cold. An ambulance was parked right in front of your house, and the front door had been thrown wide open.
Yeonjun grabs your hand as you both run up the front stairs and into the house. You see your father sitting on the floor of the kitchen, an oxygen mask covering his lower face. Your mother sits a small distance away from him, her face gray and her lips pressed into a thin line. An EMT pats your father on the shoulder before mumbling something to your mother and nodding at you and Yeonjun on his way out. The ambulance pulls away, luckily without a patient inside.
“What was that?” you blurt out, running up to your father, who is having trouble standing up on his own. His face looks gray too.
Your parents exchange worried looks before they look back at you. “Sweetheart,” your mother coaxes, “remember when your father fell off that ladder a few months ago?”
“Yes, but you told me everything was okay. Isn’t it?” you ask in a small voice that sounds childish, naive, and stupid—even to you. You feel Yeonjun stiffen beside you, and you turn to look at him. He’s always been bad at hiding things, so you immediately know. “You knew this whole time,” you say to Yeonjun, pulling away from him.
“Doll,” he says pleadingly, his eyebrows furrowed with pity and regret.
“We didn’t want to upset you,” your mother clarified, “it happened right before you and Yeonjun got engaged, and we didn’t want to spoil anything.”
“That wouldn’t have spoiled it!” you say shrilly. “I would have come to help you and Dad if I knew!”
“We knew you would, that’s why we didn’t tell you. It took so much planning and time and effort for Yeonjun to plan things out for the proposal and we didn’t want to ruin the mood before or after, and by then months had already passed…” your mother trailed off.
“I’m your daughter, I’m supposed to help you when things like that go wrong,” you say, feeling your eyes starting to well up with tears, though you’re not completely sure why. “And why does Yeonjun know, and I don’t? It would have been his planning that got ruined, not mine.”
“It was an accident,” your father says abruptly, and you see that he’s been able to stand up on his own. He leans against the kitchen table heavily. “Your mother accidentally ordered my medication to your address and Yeonjun was the one that found it.”
“Autumn Oaks will be good for them,” Yeonjun pipes up, trying to help. “They’ll get all the help they need there.”
Your eyes almost bulge out of your skull. “Autumn Oaks? The assisted living facility in town?” you ask. You pick your brain for the moment you first heard the name, and then you get it—Karina. “Even Karina knew before I did?” you fret.
“Karina? Nurse Yoo?” your dad asks.
“You know her?”
“She works there. She’s actually the one that showed us around. Do you know her?” your mother asks. She seems very nervous now, clearly due to your building emotions.
“I went to school with her,” you mumbled. Your head absolutely aches, and you stare out the front door, still hanging wide open, into the dark night that had crept up on the four of you since you got home. “I need to go for a walk,” you say. Your parents again exchange looks. “I’m not mad,” you snap, “I just need a minute to process everything.”
You feel Yeonjun start to follow you timidly, but you look back at him with narrowed eyes. “Alone,” you emphasize, and he shrinks back and lets you go.
Luckily, you had the sense to hang onto your purse the entire time, and you fumble through it for your cigarettes and a lighter. You shove one into your mouth and light it, tossing the box and the lighter back inside the mess of your bag. You don’t know where you’re walking, but the night is warm and muggy and you can feel insects swarming. You want to go back home and take a long hot shower, especially as you feel a bead of sweat slip down your back, but you don’t want to face everyone again. You feel like an idiot for acting like an emotional child, and you don’t know why you have been ever since you got back to your hometown. It was like you were reverting back to the person you were the last time you stayed that long. As if simply breathing the air and drinking the water were enough to take away ten years.
You stop walking naturally in front of a house. A large, old tree stands strong in the front yard, casting a large black shadow over the whole space. Though it’s been repainted a new color—a light beige, instead of the misty blue it once was—it still feels like your second home. You’re very sure that Beomgyu doesn’t live here any more, mostly because he said he hated bland paint colors and you simply couldn’t picture the Choi Beomgyu living in a beige house of all places. But also because your parents had told you that his parents moved out years ago and retired somewhere sunny and warm, leaving the family business to Beomgyu, who was more than willing to take over it by then. They had no news about where Beomgyu had moved to.
You feel like a freak, just standing outside someone’s house like a stalker, so you turn on your heel and start to walk away, when someone says, “hey,” in a low voice.
The front door of the blue-turned-beige house opens, and Beomgyu stands there in pajama pants and a thin white t-shirt. “Why the fuck are you here?” he says, mimicking the voice you used when he appeared on your roof.
“Shut up.”
“I’m joking. Come inside already. Aren’t the mosquitos pissing you off?” He steps aside and opens the door wider, motioning for you to come inside.
So you do.
You’re not sure what you’re expecting when you step inside. Maybe, you expected it to look exactly how it did the last time you saw it, with his parents’ furniture and decorations and family pictures on the walls. There’s a few hints of the old decor as you look around and focus on a few minor details, but for the most part it looks completely different. New furniture, more modern and young, paintings on the wall that definitely weren’t there before. There’s even an entire wall missing, the one that separated the kitchen and the front room entirely. Something about an open concept, you think solemnly, recalling an episode of HGTV you watched when you were too drunk to get up and get the remote to change the channel.
“It looks different in here,” you say bluntly.
“Well, my parents don’t live here any more, do they?” he asks cockily. “Come on, let’s go up to the bedroom. The old house still doesn’t have AC, but my bedroom has a really good fan.”
The stairs creak the same way they did when you ran down them sobbing the last time you were there. It’s bittersweet, and you hold yourself back from rolling your eyes at your old dramatic self.
Beomgyu’s right about the fan, at least. The bedroom is much cooler than the rest of the house, and it’s cast in a cold bright light from the flatscreen TV mounted on his wall, facing the foot of his bed. “Nice place,” you say, sitting on the edge of the bed. “Did you get an interior designer or something to help you with all this?”
“Or something,” he says, shrugging. He gets in bed too, patting the spot beside him once he got comfortable. You inch forward, a bit awkwardly. Your heart is pounding in your chest, and you feel like a middle school girl sitting next to her crush at the movies or something equally as corny and butterfly-inducing.
Beomgyu doesn’t hesitate to wrap an arm around you and pull you in closer, so that your legs are draped over his and his hand rests on your waist. His big hand starts to slip under your shirt, toying with the hem and teasing you. He already knows why you came to him; he can see that you’re upset. He rightfully assumes that Yeonjun is a part of the reason, and he knows that you want him to take his place, even if it’s just for a night.
Boldly, you take his hand that’s teasing you and place it firmly over your breast. Beomgyu stops pretending to watch whatever is playing on his TV and looks at you, a crooked smirk on his face. “That’s why you’re here,” he says, wanting a verbal confirmation.
“‘Course it is. No one knows how to comfort me better than you do.”
“Not even Yeonjun?” Beomgyu can’t help but ask, venom lacing his words. He can’t hide his jealousy, even when he thinks he can. It always comes spilling forth from his lips like sick word vomit.
“Not even Yeonjun,” you whisper as he closes the distance between your lips, unsure if you’re lying or not.
It’s not as frantic this time, because you know you have time. No one is expecting you home anytime soon, and Beomgyu doesn’t seem to have anything going on either. It’s a sudden but welcome change; the soft sheets instead of the splintering wood of the train car, the cool controlled breeze instead of the sweltering mugginess, the silence of closed walls instead of the risk of open air.
You let Beomgyu take off your shirt and shorts, and you settle between his legs as he whips off his own top. You pull down his pajama pants and boxers in one fluid move, taking his cock in your hand and suckling on the head. The saltiness of his precum coats your tongue as you swallow it down, your nose pressing against his crotch as his hand gently presses on your head, wordlessly begging you to take it all. It’s better than you imagined, and you’d imagined it many times.
His breathing grows ragged as you start jerking him off, his dick slippery with your saliva, and you take one of his balls into your mouth. His eyes roll back in his head as you do so, and he groans loudly. “I knew you’d be good at this,” he pants as you take his length back into your mouth.
You make a noise of confusion, the vibrations making him whimper.
“I just wanted you so bad,” he babbles, “I knew—I knew no matter what, I’d never forget—” His eyes squeeze shut as he cums, and you hollow your cheeks and swallow, eliciting a high-pitched squeak from him due to the slight overstimulation. Shaking, he opens his eyes to look down at you, and you sit back up obediently, using a finger to push a small pearly rivulet of cum into your mouth; it had been dripping down your chin.
“You’d never forget?” you asked, crawling up to him on all fours. Beomgyu feels his cock jump again as he stares at you taking off your underclothes, and he grips your hips tightly, squeezing the flesh there and exhaling deeply.
“I won’t,” he says breathily, as if he’s making a promise to you, “I won't ever forget.”
You press your forehead to his, feeling his sweaty bangs stick to your skin. The two of you stay like that for just a moment as his heavy breathing slows, and then he slowly reaches up to caress your cheek and pull you in for a kiss. He shifts beneath you, his muscles flexing as he lifts you up and tosses you down onto the soft mattress so that he’s the one on top now.
“I was having fun up there,” you say, wrapping your legs around his waist. You can feel his dick, half-hard, nudge against your clit.
“I think you’ll have fun down here too,” he says with a wink, as he presses sloppy kisses down your neck. Your toes curl as his warm breath ghosts over your nipple; he’s making his way down your body, making sure to worship every inch of your skin with his slick lips. He can’t help but flick your nub with his tongue, watching your reaction as you flinch at the unexpected contact. He envelopes your nipple and the surrounding area into his mouth, suckling hard and making your toes curl with pleasure as he grinds against you simultaneously. His teeth graze against your skin, eliciting a low moan that erupts from deep inside, so animalistic you hardly recognize yourself. You realize that with Beomgyu, unfamiliar parts of you emerge and take charge—both parts that remind you of your youth, as well as parts that you’d never met before, or even knew existed at all.
A string of saliva, glistening in the faint bluish light, connects his lips and your breast for just a second before it breaks. He looks up at you with big doll eyes and smirks, a juxtaposition of innocence and naughtiness, before mouthing the valley between your breasts and kissing his way down to your navel, then between your legs. Beomgyu’s words echo in your mind as you flush with slight embarrassment, realizing he’s staring straight at your sopping cunt with great interest. The fact that you’d both been taking your time this time around made you much more aware that he was perceiving you just as much as you were perceiving him, and that thought was making you just a bit anxious.
After all these years, he can still read you like a book. He feels your thighs tense up as he gently slides a calloused finger through your slick, and though he thinks your pussy might be the prettiest one he’s ever seen, he stops, and makes eye contact with you. Your brow is slightly furrowed, your lips pressed together—a sure sign that you’re worried about something. “Everything okay?” he asks, wiping his finger on his sheets. “You look like you’re thinking long and hard about something.”
“More like I’m thinking about something that’s long and hard.” You catch his eye for a split second before you start to grin and he bursts out laughing.
“You had me there,” he admits, settling back between your legs. “I thought you were having your reservations.”
“What, you thought I wouldn’t want to double dip or something?”
Beomgyu shakes his head, trying to suppress a smile. “I’m trying to go down on you and be all sexy, and you’re making jokes that align with the humor of an immature thirteen year old boy.”
“Sorry, I do that when I’m nervous.”
“Don’t be. It’s just me.” You lock eyes with him, but this time it sends a real chill down your spine. Different from the chills that you got when you saw him at the reunion and he handed you your keys. It was so much more than just those five words that he spoke aloud—in that phrase, he cemented the fact that you two have history, and that there is so much meaning in the actions that you’re committing together. It’s just Beomgyu—but how can he be “just” Beomgyu when your feelings about him have been the exact opposite forever? It’s never been simple. He’s never been “just” Beomgyu.
Your clouded mind is suddenly cleared when you feel his lips connect to your clit and he starts suckling roughly, similarly to how he was attached to your nipple earlier. You can feel his teeth biting at your cunt, teasing it with little flashes of pain that make your back arch and your thighs start to close in on his face. He holds your legs apart, devouring you like he’ll never have the pleasure of tasting you again, and knowing that that could be the reality. You feel a mixture of his spit and your juices running down your inner thighs and soaking the sheets beneath you, but you hardly care. You want to leave a mark in his bed, in his house—in that moment, you want it to be known that you were there.
You finish as he plunges his thick fingers into you and curls them upwards just right, and your moan catches in your throat. You almost choke on it, a few stuttering gasps being the only thing that escape your lips as you come down from your high.
Before you can fully reorient yourself, Beomgyu’s sliding his cock against your slippery pussy, whining like a bitch. He’s too embarrassed to ask if he can fuck you, but you know he wants to. You want it too, but unlike him you’re not afraid to say it. “Please,” you whisper, just like you did in the woods, “please.”
Without another word, he’s pushing into you, which is quite easy given how much lubricant there is. He grips the headboard of his bed, his knuckles turning pale from the effort, as he waits for you to tell him to go on. You reach for him and he listens immediately, almost giddy as you pull him close. You want to feel his sweat on your skin, have his spit in your mouth, feel his stuttered breaths as he gets close.
He slips a pillow under your hips before readjusting himself, wanting to make sure you’re comfortable, before he starts drilling his hips into you.
The way he fucks reminds you a bit of your hookups in college, before you got with Yeonjun. The desperation, a bit of inexperience, and the quick but deep thrusts are all too reminiscent—but in a good way. It’s different, than the way that you’d been fucked by Yeonjun all these years, and you realize that you’ve missed it. The carnal urge to just fuck like animals, without caring about staining the sheets or worrying about someone hearing you.
You don’t realize just how far you’ve shifted until your head is hanging over the side of his bed, and your eyes are level with his nightstand. You can feel him getting close already—which you’re not surprised by, given how long he’s been waiting for it—and you’re getting close yourself until you lock eyes with a framed picture sitting beside his lamp. He groans loudly as he slams his hips into yours one more time, and you can’t help but gasp as you feel him filling you up, but your eyes are focused on the picture. It’s upside down, because of the angle you’re at, but it’s pretty obvious what it is. You don’t need to be right-side-up to know that it’s a wedding photo. And not just any wedding photo either—it’s a picture of Beomgyu and Karina.
It hits you like a ton of bricks. You’re the other woman, just as he’s the other man. You try to sit up, forgetting that he’s still hovering above you and trying to recover from having two orgasms quite close together, and smack your forehead into his.
“Ow!” he exclaims, pulling out of you and sitting back.
“You’re married!” you blurt out, scrambling away from him. His gaze drops to the photograph on his nightstand, and he wrinkles his nose guiltily.
“Well—yeah… But you’re engaged.” This time, it’s your gaze that drops—and you look down at the diamond ring on your finger. There’s a deep, gnawing pain that’s arising in your stomach, and you know what it is immediately. Guilt, so thick and dark you swear anyone who looks at you could see it seeping from your very pores, is tearing you apart. You feel yourself tearing up, which is somewhat ridiculous because you’d known this whole time that you were cheating. You weren’t an idiot and you weren’t manipulated either—you were a completely conscious and self-aware asshole that chose to cheat on her fiancé with her first love. And so was he.
You furiously wipe at your eyes with the back of your hand and stand up, crossing your arms over your chest as you scan the room for your clothes. You go around and pick up your garments one by one and put them on, and Beomgyu watches you solemnly. Neither of you say anything until you’re fully dressed and he’s at least pulled on his boxers and pants. You stand there at the foot of his—no, his and Karina’s king-sized bed, and glare at him. It’s hypocritical to be mad at him for cheating when you’ve been doing the exact same thing, but for some reason that’s how your brain is functioning.
“Why wouldn’t you tell me?” you asked, staring at the floor. You don’t know if you’ll cry or fall for him harder if you look into his eyes again. You fear that it might be both.
“I don’t know. It just never came up,” he says lamely. You narrow your eyes at his half-assed reply.
“I helped you cheat on her.”
“So what? I’ve been helping you cheat on Yeonjun. How’s this any worse than that? In the end we’re both just assholes.”
“Because I know Karina! She was the closest thing I had to a girl friend here in town!” you exclaim, “It's not like you know Yeonjun—you don’t care about hurting him. I care about hurting Karina!”
“But you don’t care about hurting your own fiancé?” Beomgyu rubs the back of his neck, confused, and stares at the floor. “I don’t get you.”
“That’s not the point,” you mutter, “but it doesn’t matter. Whatever. It’s already done, and like you said, we’re both the assholes in the end.” You can feel his cum leaking out of your cunt and pooling in your underwear. You want to go home and shower, without anyone seeing you or talking to you. You briskly walk over to his bathroom while rummaging in your purse for something to touch up your disheveled appearance.
You’re wiping at the makeup that’s started to slide off your eyes with a dry makeup wipe you found at the bottom of your purse when Beomgyu appears behind you in the mirror. He’s still shirtless, and somehow still beautiful in the shitty bathroom lighting. You stop your futile attempts to fix your appearance and stare at his reflection with weary eyes. He wraps his arms around you and presses a long kiss to the top of your head as he inhales your scent and takes it all in, knowing that you won’t return. You let him.
“I just got you back,” he mumbles, “and now you’re leaving again.”
“I wasn’t ever planning on staying. I wasn’t even planning on seeing you again,” you say firmly, though it’s obvious when your voice shakes that you hardly believe your own words.
“But you did,” he whispers. “Doesn’t that mean something? Doesn’t—doesn’t the fact that you’re standing here in my house, in my shirt, with my cum leaking out of you, mean something?”
You look down. You are, in fact, wearing his shirt. Somehow you must have pulled it on instead of your own. Even worse, you recognize it as an old band t-shirt that he used to wear in high school. You shake your head and pull it off, throwing it aside as you walk back to his bedroom and find your own shirt crumpled in a mess on his floor.
Looking wounded, Beomgyu appears in the doorway, clutching his abandoned shirt. “Are you really leaving?”
“Well, I don’t know when Karina will be back but I don’t want her to see me sleeping on her side of the bed,” you say coldly, “and I have a fiancé I need to get back to.”
“A fiancé who doesn’t know his future wife is a dirty cheater,” Beomgyu says, glaring at you. You see tears in his eyes, the hurt evident on his face.
“Don’t start that shit with me,” you snap. “And don’t contact me ever again.”
“I did a pretty good job avoiding you for ten years. What’s another ten, twenty, thirty more?” Beomgyu spits back, but his tears start to spill out and he turns away, not knowing you already saw them.
But you don’t care. You don’t want to care. So you gather your things and you go, slamming his front door so hard that the stained glass wind chimes hanging on his front porch fall and shatter on the wooden floor. You don’t even give the mess a second glance as you stomp down the stairs and down the path home.
The lights are all off, except for one. Your bedroom light is on, and you know that Yeonjun must have left it on. Whether he’s awake or not, he was waiting for you, and that makes the guilt sink into your stomach even further. You didn’t know it was possible to feel even worse than you did while you were laying in Beomgyu’s bed.
As quiet as possible, you unlock the front door and close it behind you, re-locking it and wincing as the heavy iron lock clicks into place. You creep up the stairs and peek around the corner, sighing with relief when you realize that your bedroom door is closed. You’re allowed to slip into the bathroom and wash yourself of all the evidence of Beomgyu before being confronted by anyone. Usually, you’re plagued with thoughts in the shower—whether that’s stress about work or dinner plans for the night, your mind is always running as you shampoo your hair. Tonight, it’s the opposite. You feel blank and numb as you rinse yourself and step out of the tub, toweling yourself dry before tiptoeing down the hallway and letting yourself into your bedroom.
Yeonjun is wedged against the wall in your childhood bedroom, leaving space for you in your little twin bed. You’re realizing just now how bare the room looks—everything is gone except for the bed and the little nightstand, where Yeonjun’s glasses and your cup of water live every night. He’s scrolling on his phone but he looks up immediately when he hears the door, and his face lights up when he realizes it’s you. “Welcome back,” he says carefully, not wanting to breach the subject unless you propose it.
You leap into his arms, feeling the guilt twisting your stomach into knots as he presses warm kisses to your clean skin. “I went to a friend’s house,” you clarify, “and we just smoked and sat there for a while. I just needed to get away for a minute.”
“Okay,” Yeonjun says, rubbing your arms comfortingly, “thank you for telling me.”
“It was an acquaintance from high school. Her name is Minjeong.”
Though he didn’t ask who the friend was, you can see relief flood across his face as he realizes it wasn’t Beomgyu—or even another guy. “I’m glad that you feel better now,” he says, pressing a kiss to your naked collarbone. You slide off his lap and get dressed, tossing the towel onto the floor.
“Come to bed,” he coaxes, “it’s nice and cozy.”
“I don’t doubt that,” you reply, sidling in next to him. As soon as you lay down, he wraps an arm around you and kisses your cheek. “I love you,” you say, desperate for him to say it back, even though you know he will—from his knowledge, he has no reason to doubt you at all.
“I love you too doll,” he mumbles sleepily, and then he’s gone. Asleep, dead to the world, no nasty thoughts plaguing his mind.
Unlike Yeonjun, you lay there awake for hours, unable to fall asleep for a multitude of reasons. Even worse, you know that most of these reasons are your own fault, and that guilt is eating you alive. Every single thought that you had managed to avoid in the shower was haunting you now, forcing your eyelids to stay open and keeping your heartbeat racing.
—
On the last morning that you will ever spend in your childhood home, you are awakened in the early hours of the morning by a massive moving truck trying to parallel park right beside your driveway. Yeonjun is already stirring, both from the noise outside as well as your movements, and he blinks hard as his eyes adjust to the bleary light. It’s so early that the sun hasn’t fully risen yet, and you can see from your window that the late summer has given birth to a smattering of dewdrops stricken across the greenery, giving it a haunting, blurred look. The palest of sunlight spreads across the land, a subtle “good morning” before the dry heat that’s sure to come once the quiet early morning hours wither away. Your parents are shuffling about downstairs, pushing all of the boxes and furniture into the front room so that the movers can have easy access and you can all hopefully be out by the designated time. The faint smell of dark roast coffee reaches your nose, and it reminds you of the youthful years you spent here, and how you got so used to that smell of coffee in the morning. When did you forget about it? When did you adopt a new norm?
Yeonjun presses a sleepy kiss to your cheek before climbing over you and claiming the bathroom first, and you hear the shower turn on. He’s always been a morning person, whereas you prefer to bathe during the night. It works out well in your apartment, where you only have one bathroom. You glance down at your phone, which has coincidentally given you an update on a few places the two of you had been looking to move. The crowded apartment, though now nostalgic and homey, is simply too small now. You’ve outgrown it.
You busy yourself with cleaning up a few stray clothing items scattered across the hardwood floor, your bare feet making small pattering sounds as you walk about. It’s hard to sort between your clothes and Yeonjun’s clothes—you tend to share a lot of garments, and you have a similar taste.
As soon as you zip up your own suitcase and sit down with a huff, Yeonjun strolls back into the room, a towel clinging to his waist and another slung around his neck. He uses one end to rub at his dripping locks, and you jump up to escape to the bathroom, suddenly very aware of where you were last night, as well as the fact that you’re unsure how to further explain yourself if anyone asks. “I’ll be down in a few,” you say to him, “I’ll help bring down our suitcases and everything.”
“Don’t worry about it, I’ve got it,” he says, shaking his head. “Take your time. Your parents have coffee on the table too if you need some.”
“When did you have time to go and say good morning to them?” you exclaim, your voice echoing down the empty hallway.
“I didn’t! I just know!” he yells back, and that makes your skin prickle. The ease of Yeonjun becoming a part of your family—it makes you feel that guilt even more. How could you take him away from your parents now? How could you take your parents from him?
Once you’re done washing the sleep away from yourself, you get dressed and frown at the room that’s now completely empty. You’d heard people coming up and down the steps, but you didn’t think they’d touch your room. Now, even the bed that you’d just slept in was gone. For a moment, you stand there in your bedroom alone. Though, you suppose you can’t even really call it that any more—you don’t possess it. How long has it been since it was really yours anyways? A decade? More? Less? You try to hold your emotions back, because it’s just a house, but it’s to no avail. You have to return to the bathroom and wipe your tears carefully with your sleeve while staring in the mirror and realizing just how much your reflection has changed.
“Are you sure? We can stay and help, it’s no problem,” Yeonjun’s voice echoes up the stairs. You sidle into the kitchen and stand in the doorway, looking at your parents and your fiancé. They’re standing across from each other in the kitchen, all holding steaming mugs of coffee.
“Oh, don’t worry about us. We don’t want you to miss your flight,” your mother insists, “the movers said they could help us just fine. They’ve been moving a lot of folks into Autumn Oaks lately.”
Your chest clenches a bit at the thought of your parents in assisted living—were they really that old already? They seem perfectly capable, aside from the incident with your father. You suppose that’s reason enough to consider assisted living.
“Okay, but call immediately if you need anything,” Yeonjun says warily, placing his empty mug down on the kitchen counter. “I’m going to call a car.”
He ruffles your hair when he notices you standing in the doorway, and then walks out. This leaves you with your parents, the both of them standing there and smiling at you. You know it’s because of Yeonjun. You know they wholeheartedly think you’re safe with him, and that he’s your forever. Who are you to say he isn’t?
“We really can stay and help you guys,” you offer again, but your father shakes his head.
“And we told you we can handle it,” he says softly, “you have a flight to catch.”
Your shoulders sag as you sigh. Perhaps, you weren’t only wanting to stay for your parents. You don’t want to let go of the house, of your aging parents, of Beomgyu. You don’t want to let go of your hometown, even though you hate it so much. And even though Autumn Oaks was just a drive away, hardly even separate from your hometown, it still felt like the end of an era, a disconnect, a severing of the last attachment you had to your childhood and everything that came with it. You got your closure, and that was what you wanted—so why did it feel wrong? For the first time in so many years, you feel like you’ve made bad decisions that you cannot come back from.
“Okay,” you say. “It was really nice seeing you. And I guess—to see the house one last time.” You will your emotions to stay under control. “I’m going to miss you.”
“We always miss you too,” your mother says, pulling you into a hug. “But we’ll see you come Christmas, won’t we? Maybe we can come and visit you and Yeonjun in the city this year.”
“That would be really nice, Mom,” you whisper as she lets go. She stands back, still holding onto your arms, and looks at you.
“You’ve grown so much. We’re so proud of you,” your dad says, and it’s like he’s reading your mother’s mind as a tear trickles down her face. The three of you briefly embrace, a final wordless reminder of every memory that you had together in that house, and then you blink and it’s all gone.
Yeonjun comes for you when the car pulls up outside, and before you know it you’re staring out the airplane window, looking at all the miniature houses down below. You’re finally going back home, but you know you left a piece of yourself in your hometown, and you’ll never see her again.
Maybe that’s for the better.
EPILOGUE.
Yoo Jimin, known most commonly by her nickname Karina, is fucking exhausted.
It’s the first snow of the year, she’s worked two double night shifts in one week, and she’s trying her damn best to get the household ready for the holiday season. She’s a woman who knows what she wants, and though this means she takes charge and gets shit done, it also means she burns out. Fast. And frequently.
Her vision is slightly blurry on her drive home from Autumn Oaks, where she’d been busy tending to two new residents. They had made sure to try and shoo her away, claiming that they were just fine on their own and getting settled in, but it was her job to check in on them every now and then. She groans aloud in her car, thinking about how much she wanted to sink into a hot bath and just be alone for a while.
The windshield wipers obediently push the fat snowflakes gathering on the glass away and out of sight as she pulls into her driveway. At least it looks cozy from the outside, as she’d made sure to tell her husband to put up the Christmas lights outside. He did, and they were twinkling warmly at her as she stepped out of the car.
She knows that Beomgyu is sleeping. He sleeps a lot, and not just because she tends to work nights and he always works days, but because he’s been avoiding her.
It was a natural conclusion that she came to, and that would be just fine with her because she knows that marriage isn’t some perfect fairytale, but there’s something that’s been nagging at her for months now. Beomgyu had been acting normal until the end of summer, after the reunion. It was quite popular amongst the gossipy folks, mostly because of a certain quiet individual who had become vastly successful in her market after leaving town about ten years ago. She was by no means a celebrity, but her success and emerging personality was a pleasant surprise to a lot of people—Beomgyu included.
This was worrying for two reasons.
One, because everything lined up pretty perfectly with the last time she was in town.
And two, because she knew damn well, more than anyone else, of that individual’s history with Beomgyu.
Maybe that’s a bit of a stretch. Everyone who knew Beomgyu knew about her too. Everyone thought they’d get married and stay in town forever, so it was quite a shocker when they ended up fizzling out and she left for New York so abruptly. It’s a little odd that everyone’s still so obsessed with their failed love story, but small towns tend to hold onto any bit of drama they can get. When tornadoes bring in people from the past, it’s inevitable that a rainstorm of gossip will come along with it.
The house is quiet when she walks in. She sees Beomgyu asleep on the couch in front of the fireplace, which is only dying embers now. They glow a faint red, barely sparking, but are still exuding a fair bit of warmth. The entire house smells like firewood and sugar, the latter scent being courtesy to Beomgyu’s newfound hobby. Baking, of all things! Karina simply didn’t understand where it was coming from. This too began at the end of summer, when he declared that he was sick and tired of store bought treats (he’d never had a problem with them before) and that he was taking on the task of providing the two of them with fresh baked goods whenever they wanted.
He was horrible at it, for a while. He’d never baked anything edible in his life, and he went through a fair bit of money buying ingredients because of how often he would mess up and want to try again. If anything, his determination was what linked banking to his other interests. He had always been a stubborn asshole, especially when it came to working at the auto shop, previously owned by his father, and before that his grandfather.
But eventually, he got better. He liked to make muffins, and he would leave them out for Karina when she returned from her night shift, still warm to the touch—he’d often be awake well into the early hours of the morning to try and get a new recipe right. It was enough overlap that Karina, who got home around four in the morning, was able to get to them while they were still fresh. Eventually, this was the only was she ever felt warmth from her husband.
She walks over to the couch quietly. She had slipped off her shoes as soon as she walked through the door, wanting to keep the floors clean.
Beomgyu looked peaceful when he slept—a facial expression that never occurred naturally around her any more. She smoothed a lock of reddish brown hair out of his eyes, and he winced at the contact. She removed her touch from his face, but the damage was already done. Her husband opened his eyes, one before the other, and frowned in the firelight. “What time is it?” he asked. “Did you just get back?”
“Four fifteen,” she confirms, “what did you make tonight?”
“Blueberry streusel,” he replied, sitting up and yawning. He did not, however, move to go to sleep in their bed, with her.
“Muffins,” she said quietly, staring at the muffins, still steaming from the oven.
A silence settles upon the couple, in which nothing is heard but the howling winds outside and the faint crackling of the dying embers in the fireplace.
“I think I’m gonna head to bed—“
“I can’t live like this any more—“
The two of them stare at each other, both cut off by the other. “What do you mean you can’t live like this any more?” Karina asks sharply, any semblance of sleepiness immediately gone from her body. “What does that mean?”
Beomgyu rubs the sleep from his face and groans into his own grasp. “I just—I don’t think I’m happy like this.”
“With me,” Karina says, though it’s more of a question than anything. She already knows the answer.
“Just with everything. I feel like I’ve done nothing with my life,” he explains, ruffling his own hair. Her fingers twitch, wanting so desperately to run through those soft locks.
“What does that mean for us?” she asks in a small voice. She hates how meek she sounds.
Beomgyu shrugs, as if she’s simply asking him what he wanted for dinner. “I don’t know.”
She’s suddenly angry more than sad, but she feels tears coming to her eyes either way. “It’s because of her,” she spits, to which Beomgyu’s eyes widen. He already knows who she’s talking about.
“Who?” he asks, eyes darting around wildly.
“You know damn well who.”
Beomgyu doesn’t respond to his wife, and instead they stare at each other as a frigid cold settled over them. She couldn’t undo what she said, and he couldn’t undo what he did—that was that.
Silence ensued for the rest of the night, and in the morning when Beomgyu awoke again his wife was gone. He had a voicemail left by one of her friends, stating that she’d be around every now and then in the coming week to pick up Karina’s things little by little. Karina, it seemed, did not ever want to see Beomgyu again.
He understood that decision—honestly, he did. He felt guilty after he realized just how much warmth and love she had provided him, even if he never picked up on it before and surely took it for granted. There was a cold void left behind, and it was slowly overtaking the entire house.
Beomgyu didn’t know what else to do—what else could he do? With his wife gone, his auto shop mediocre at best, and no one important left in his life? Other than his parents, who had already retired and moved away years ago, he had absolutely no one left. All he had was shattered remnants of past relationships—and in grasping onto those shards desperately, not caring whether or not they cut into his flesh, he sold the house and used his funds to move to the city that never sleeps, in the hopes that someone somewhere would be able to wake him out of the waking nightmare he’d been living for the past decade.
i need a spiderman beomgyu, he really fits as spiderman🤭
Ngl he does- coming your way!
Spider-love
pairing: Spider-Man!Beomgyu x reader
genre: smut
warnings: unprotected sex, oral (m,f receiving), 69, fingering, handjob, blowjob, thigh kink, Beomgyu muscles being a huge turn on, grinding.
You watched the live broadcast of your boyfriend fighting in panic, very nervous that he was going to get really badly hurt. Luckily, he got away with a few scratches and his identity still secret. You watched the tv as he swung away, unaware he was coming towards your apartment. You turned the tv off, headed to the kitchen for some water, but you were startled at the sound of your window being knocked on.
Rushing over, you went and opened it, letting him in. “What happened Gyu? Are you hurt? Are you okay? Are you..” you rambled on, not realizing he had taken off his mask and gave you a kiss on the lips. “Can you patch me up? Please?” How could you resist when he asked so sweetly. You led him to the couch, sitting right on his lap and using the first aid kit that you kept under the couch in case of instances like this. He had taken off the suit and was just in some pants he found while you were trying to fish it out. As soon as you saw him without his shirt and just his abs and muscles, you knew you weren’t going to last. “Hey babe, the scratches are up here on my face.” He teased, snickering at your staring.
You looked up at his face, flustered and got out the cotton, band aids, and disinfectant. You got to work on patching him up, at one point you managed to get super close to him chest to chest, crotch to crotch.. but you didn’t notice and just kept on disinfecting his wounds. You kept squirming around to clean the wounds on his neck, awakening his big friend. He put his hands on your hips, stopping your movement. “Jagi.. stop..” he groaned softly, throwing his head back. “Gyu I have to clean- oh.” You stopped what you were saying as you felt it. He just chuckled, pushing you down on his crotch. You gasped, surprised at the action, your hands instinctively going to his shoulders. “Seems like you’re also a bit needy, huh?” He whispered into your ears. “Gyu please!” You begged as he started kissing down your neck.
He picked you up, you wrapped your legs around his waist, your clit rubbing perfectly against his abs through your panties (you were wearing a skirt). He started making out with you on the way to your bedroom, laying you down on your bed when you got inside. “Can I take this off darling?” He asked, tugging your top. You just nodded, breathing deep. “And your skirt?” He asked, not expecting you to say that he could take everything off. He took off your skirt, licking your pussy through the panties, sucking your clit hard. You moaned loudly as he did, tugging his hair. He took your panties off, licking your pussy as if it was a feast. “Mm, wait wait wait-“ he said, pulling away. You whined, trying to pull him back, he just chuckled at that. He turned around, so that his dock was in your face, after he took off his boxers and your bra of course. You immediately took him in your mouth, making him moan loud. The vibrations on your cunt making you moan loudly on his dick. He inserted his fingers in you, scissoring you open and he also moaned at the vibrations of your moaning since his comic was so deep in your throat he felt it tenfold than usual. He moaned right on your clit and not that long after you came on his face, hard.
he also came down your throat hard, you both spasmed really violently. He didn’t even bother moving you, he just moved back to where he was between your knees and started fucking you, not giving you any time to adjust. “Fuck- doing so good- ugh-“ he grunted, fucking you past overstimulation. (Bitch I suck at smut, I’m so sorry 😭 I’ll work on it).
he lied down next to you, panting hard as you hugged at his expression, you both got under the covers and drifted off. (I also wrote this in the worst condition I’m so sorry it’s like 1am here, please dm me if you want me to rewrite it.)
shit the train is late and you're about to miss finals, can't this day get any worse?
yes! yes it can :)
you got on the train and as you were exiting you notice some eyes on you, you felt extremely uncomfortable and just knew you needed to get out of that station now. as you were heading to the stairs you bump into a strong figure. "i'm so sorry" the both of you say. you lock eyes with the redhead. "i'm beomgyu" he says while walking up the stairs with you "y/n. arent you in my class?" you ask. "yeah.. running late to finals too?" he chuckles a little when you say yes. as the two of you reach the top of the stairs and see the beautiful city, some huge octopus man is ruining buildings. "what the fuck is that" you say turning to beomgyu's way and noticed he had disappeared. you turn your head side to side and just figured you lost him. the octopus man came closer and kept calling out to spiderman.
you started running because one, you are so close to missing the finals and two you really don't wanna die right now. out of nowhere you felt something picking you up. you start screaming for help, its like no one can hear you. "seems like spiderman doesn't care much about the people of new york." octopus man says as he throws you. you see your life flash before your eyes. but you're safe. spiderman caught you.
he drops you off near the university which wasn't that far from where he was going to fight the octopus man. "good luck on your finals" he says before he swung away and you start running to your class, praying you're not late. you noticed the fighting stopped. as you are reaching your class you accidentally trip literally out of thin air oh my fucking god you thought. as you tripped beomgyu came in through the window and felt bad that he had to trip you but his identity can't be known. he slipped right into class as you came in as well. "you two are late! please sit down." your teacher scolds the both of you.
beomgyu finishes a few minutes before you did. you were secretly hoping he would be waiting for you. you finally finished and, nope he wasn't there.. as you were heading towards the exit you stopped your tracks and realized what spiderman told you before he left. "good luck on your finals" huh? how'd he know? "hey! y/n right?" beomgyu stopped your thinking. "yeah what's up" you respond following with a smile. "you wanna get some coffee with me right now?" he asks politely "sure why not" and the thought of spiderman leaves your mind but little do you know you're about to get coffee with him.
hai!! tysm for reading my first tiny story. i just kept thinking about spidergyu after watching tasm a while back :3 i lov andrews spiderman, he was my inspiration for this but half way i remembered dr.otto was tobey's second villain LMAOO but still anyways thank you for reading and have a great day moa :3
summary - y/n’s life hasn't been easy for as she works hard to maintain her gpa in order to continue attending a fancy school under a scholarship. But to her surprise, the richest and most popular boy in the school, Choi Beomgyu invites her to his Valentine's Day Party that he will host at the fanciest club in the city. Things unfold at the party when their hidden feeling for each other ignite into fiery love and burning passion.
genre - smut, acquaintances to lovers
warnings - cursing, alcohol use, partying, dirty dancing, fingering, first time, soft!dom gyu, eating out, oral sex, bath sex, lube, pov first person, breast fucking, size kink, and more
a/n - this book is also published on my ao3 and wattpad: zoldyckfreecss03
Part 1
Ding-Ding-Ding!
The minute bell echoed profusely throughout the spacious halls, notifying the students to hurry along to their next class, to which most of them would pay no mind. I hurried down the slick, marble hallway from lunch to my next class; advanced biology lab. It was my 5th period of the day so I was a bit tired, but I had regained some energy from lunch so I didn't feel like a walking zombie.
The halls of my high school were much different from other high schools because mine was, well, very elite. Preppy. Classy. Rich. You name it, any synonym for the word expensive just about perfectly describes this school. The whole building was practically glass. Windows lined every wall, from floor to ceiling, hallways to classrooms. The black and white marble flooring looked almost wet, glossed over with fresh polish every week it seemed. Crystal chandeliers hung elegantly from the high ceilings of every hall, providing a sophisticated gleam to the place. Last but not least, the grand scholarship award at the end of the hall was the cherry on top. Crafted of real gold, the award was carved in the shape of an angel with its large fanned wings, locked away in a glass case with 24/7 surveillance. It really gave the school its mystery, elegance, and competitiveness.
The scholarship would pay a full ride to one new student each year. A lot of the students here didn't really need to worry about expenses, but coming from a less fortunate family myself, I was beyond grateful to be this year's grand scholarship recipient. I made sure to work hard every single day to maintain my grade point average to continue attending this academy under the prestigious scholarship. The award was mostly funded by the school's benefactors. One of the largest contributors being the family of Choi Beomgyu, a student at our school. I didn't know much about him, but one thing that goes without saying is that his family is probably, no, most definitely rolling in dough. Slightly above the award hung a plaque with his family picture on it, consisting of two serious looking men (which I could assume were his father and uncle), and his mother on the other end. Their ash blond-haired son sat in between them, a bright, confident smile on his face, which I always seemed to notice whenever I walked past the award. He seemed pretty popular around here, considering I share a class with him. But I was never in a place to talk to him, or let alone knew what to say.
Finally making it to 5th period, I strolled into the usual freezing cold biology lab classroom, finding my desk at the front right by the window. Due to the fact that we had to wear these preppy school uniforms, the thin fabric never fulfilled my body of it's needed heat, so I quickly wrapped my cozy red cardigan around my shoulders to warm myself up. Soon enough once all the students had filled the classroom, our biology instructor, Mr. Kang began giving instructions to what we would be doing in today's class. For the past week, we had been discussing and preparing for a lab in which we would be getting one assigned lab partner to work with. The lab seemed pretty interesting, involving the dissection of several types of poisonous mushrooms. We were required to wear goggles, lab coats, and gloves to protect us from the potentially harmful matter. Very interesting indeed.
Mr. Kang began excitedly circling around the classroom, stopping at each desk to hand out little slips of paper with a random student's name like he usually did when he was assigning partners. Since I didn't have any close friends in this class, I was feeling curious as to who's name would be on my slip. He quickly came and went from my desk with a toothy grin, dropping a small, folded piece of paper onto my desk. I slowly began unravelling it, hearing the classroom progressively become louder as partners joined together. I held the unfolded paper in my hand, revealing a name that caused a small twist in my stomach.
"Choi Beomgyu."
I quickly scanned my eyes over the small, scribbled letters of his name countless times until my brain processed that I now had to get up and look for this guy so we could start the lab. I was mainly trying to process the fact that I got paired up with the scholarship benefactor's son, aka the prince of the school. Lets see how this goes. I took a deep breath to steady myself.
At that, I stood up and spun around on my heel in search of the tall, ash blonde-haired boy who most likely would be busy chatting with other students, considering his widespread admiration amongst the school.
"Y/n, is it?" I heard a deep, airy voice call from behind me, slightly startling me since it was so unexpected. I spun back around on my heel, now face to face with the boy himself.
His uniform was the neatest I've seen on any boy around here; a crisp, white dress-shirt buttoned up all the way to his neck, perfectly secured by a red striped tie, tucked into some grey pants and a navy blue uniform coat completely free of wrinkles. He looked sharp. I looked up at him, his dark brown eyes staring back at me expectantly. His backpack was slung around an arm casually as he held the small slip of paper in his hand, using his index finger to point at my name.
I nodded, "That's me!" He stuffed the paper into the pocket of his navy blue uniform coat, not an ounce of expression on his face.
"Lets get to it, then." He set his hefty backpack down on my desk, taking my seat.
"You can go get the supplies while I write our names on the lab sheet," he said plainly without looking up once. My eyes narrowed in slight irritation at his coldness.
I let out a breath, turning around to go get the stuff. "Nice to meet you too," I muttered sarcastically under my breath once I was far enough away.
I hope he isn't like this the whole lab. But what am I to expect? I don't even know him.
After picking up two of each lab coat, goggles, and gloves, I headed back to my desk to find him texting on his phone, fingers typing quickly on the screen. I set the lab coat on top of his hands as to give him the signal of my presence, causing him to glare up at me.
"You can text your girlfriends later," I motioned nonchalantly, half joking. I really wasn't sure if he had a girlfriend but I just assumed that, due to the fact that literally every girl is crazy over him. We didn't have time to waste and I wanted to get to work on this project.
He furrowed his brows at me, "What?" he inquired.
I said exactly what I was thinking, "We don't have time to waste. I want to get to work on this project."
A silly idea occurred to me which I thought would get his attention. I clasped my hands together and sarcastically made a pleading gesture, making puppy eyes at him. "Pleaseeeeeeeee."
That seemed to work when he put both his hands up by his sides, admitting defeat. "Fine," he exhaled, "You win."
"Finally," I added, rolling my eyes. He cleared my desk of all his belongings to begin the project. I noticed that the lab sheet, the one he said he would get, was nowhere to be found.
"Where's the lab sheet?" I inquired, lifting a brow at the seated boy. He pursed his lips, darting his eyes over at the table where the lab sheets were stacked. It was evident he hadn't picked one up. I crossed my arms, disappointment written all over my face. Before I could speak, he held a hand up as to shush me.
"Close your eyes real quick," he said, glancing over at the stack. I didn't close them. He tilted his head in confusion, "Oh? I'll close them for you then." He stood up from his seat and cupped a warm hand over my eyes. I kept my eyes open under his fingers, the only thing visible were a few cracks of light which leaked in from the classroom. I felt him shift around momentarily, and then removed his hand from my eyes.
"Ta-da." He enthusiastically cheered, placing the lab sheet on the desk. I was slightly impressed to see he had put in effort to make his cheer actually sound excited. Because from what I had noticed, he wasn't one to show much amusement.
"Now that wasn't so hard was it?" I asked, hands on my hips as I tilted my head at him. "Now, if you will, i'm going to take my seat back." I sat down in my seat, forcing him to pull his own seat out from another desk. Instead of sitting across from me like I had expected, he set it down it next to mine. He slumped down comfortably in the chair, propping a leg up on his other knee. I slid the lab sheet over to him, motioning for him to write his name down. He zipped open a compartment of his black bag, selecting a purple ink pen and leaned over the paper to begin writing, a determined expression on his face.
I read the paper over; Names: Choi Beomgyu
His handwriting stuck out to me, it was neater than my own.
"What's your last name?" He asked, pen still in his hand. I took this as a signal that he wanted to take the lead and write both of our names down.
"L/n," I replied, spelling my last name out for him letter by letter. I noticed that he froze where he was, not moving an inch at the sound of my full name. He quickly swiveled his head to look at me.
"Y/n L/n? You're the winner of this year's scholarship," he remarked, curiosity lacing his voice.
I nodded my head slowly, "Yeah... yeah I am."
A lighter expression washed over his face, lips faintly tugging up at each corner.
"I got the smartest girl in the room- no, in the school as my lab partner, how cool is that." He nodded slowly to himself, returning to the paper to neatly write down my last name. It seemed more like he was talking to himself, but I couldn't help but smile at the endearment. I felt my smile grow a bit too wide, making my cheeks slightly burn. I shook off the feeling and returned to find that my classmate had finished writing my name.
The paper now read:
Names: Choi Beomgyu + Y/n L/n
~
"Ouch! What the- what are you doing? Here give me that," he hissed, snatching the clear goggles away from my grasp as I was helping him put them on at his request.
A strand of his hair had gotten stuck in between the plastic and the stretchy band, causing him to reach up and grab my hand at the tug. I giggled as he scrunched his nose, rubbing the top of his head where I had accidentally pulled his hair.
"Dummy," he said teased, adjusting the goggles over his eyes as I giggled. When his goggles were on, the first part of the lab was complete; safety first.
We both sat there facing one another, lips pursed as we held in our laughs at the sight of each other wearing the silliest looking goggles, huge lab coats, and dishwashing gloves. We looked like mad scientists. As Beomgyu leaned over to checkmark the box on our lab sheet, I couldn't hold it in any longer when he struggled to hold the pen because of how long the fingers of the gloves were on him.
I was the first to release my laughter, which was dying to come out at this point. It echoed loudly throughout the classroom, drawing stares from all around. Shortly after, the blonde-haired boy dropped his head into his arm on the table and I watched as his back heaved up and down in laughter. Our fun was short lived when I sensed the observant presence of Mr. Kang behind us. He stood with a long wooden pointer, patiently resting his hand on the top of it as he watched us breathlessly regain our composure. I tried my best to wipe the prevalent smile of laughter off of my face, wondering how long he had been standing there. Mr. Kang then placed the end of his pointer on Beomgyu, who was still face down on the desk, tapping it lightly on his shoulder.
Thankfully, Mr. Kang was an extremely kind teacher who didn't give us any sort of penalty. He simply brought his rectangular glasses down to his nose, lifting an eyebrow at us which served as a warning to get back to work. He was a quiet man, his gentleness and good nature obvious in his aura. Mr. Kang was definitely my favorite teacher and I didn't want to disappoint him any further. I straightened my posture to convey a more serious demeanor to my lab partner, who peeked up at me through some strands of hair as he continued to lay face down, cheek resting on his arm.
Suddenly, his head jerked up at the sound of his name across the classroom.
"Psst Beomgyu-hyung!" the whisper of a voice came from the table next to us. I glanced over to find a fluffy haired boy with his hands cupped around his mouth to project his voice, a mischievous smile on his face as he whisper-yelled over to our desk.
"What's up Huening?" Beomgyu gave him his attention, whisper-yelling back.
"You excited for the big night tomorrow?" the brown haired boy grinned, raising his eyebrows suggestively.
Beomgyu glanced around the classroom in search of Mr. Kang before continuing to speak with the boy. The coast was clear, so he responded, "Of course man, see you there!" he nodded his head dismissively at the boy before turning back to me.
Big night? I thought to myself momentarily, before dropping the thought because it was really none of my business.
The air fell silent between Beomgyu and I as he doodled a small bear at the top right of our lab sheet, lost in thought. I continued with the lab, examining small fragments of mushroom through a microscope, jotting down notes along the way.
"Hey can I ask you something?" He broke the silence, leaning towards me.
"Sure, go ahead," I gestured with my pen, jotting down one last note before setting it down, giving him my full attention.
"Would you like to come to my Valentine's Day Party tomorrow night?" The word 'my' stuck out to me like a sore thumb.
I weighed my opinions. I could either go to this party and see what it's all about, or spend my Saturday night studying for finals while listening to my favorite music. But I spend every Saturday night doing that, plus it might be fun to do something new for a change. It was a quick decision on my end.
"Sure," I nodded, pleased with my decision. My thoughts began to buzz, curious for the exact details.
Just as I opened my mouth to ask where and what time, he took out a small piece of paper from his backpack and a pink pen, jotting something down quickly. His eyes focused on the paper as he quickly wrote, almost as if it was a very secretive thing. Or at least, that's the vibe I picked up on during his short conversation with Huening.
Not before long, he slid the small paper in front of me, his dainty script immediately drawing my attention.
Choi Beomgyu's Valentine's Day Party
Location: The Lake Club, 31301 N Lake Club Ave.
@ 7:30 pm
I scanned my eyes over the sheet and then folded it before stuffing it in my cardigan pocket. My eyes were wide, flabbergasted at the location of the event. I had only seen The Lake Club advertised on celebrity's instagram accounts. It was definitely no place for someone like me, who's family had a severely poor financial standing, hardly able to afford living in this city. I pushed my thoughts away with a breath, reassuring myself that it can't possibly be that bad. I was now an invited guest, so I doubt I would have to pay to enter.
"I'll be there," I smiled, and the bell dinged, signaling the end of our class. Beomgyu nodded in verification, the corners of his lips drawing ever so slightly upward. "Cool, I'll see you there."
We both stood to pack up our stuff, then he was off to his desk.
Mr. Kang stood by the door like always, smiling at the students on their way out. Soon, Beomgyu and I were the only two in the room because we were late to pack up.
I heard a few shuffles behind me as I quickly zipped up my backpack and threw it over my shoulder. I turned around only to be face to face with Beomgyu, who had seemingly returned to tell me something. He leaned in secretively, moving his face the closest to my ear he had ever been.
"Oh and...don't forget to wear pink," his smooth voice trickled into my ear as he spoke lowly, as to only be heard only by me. He pulled away, gazing at me once more before spinning around and headed out the door to his next class. I was stuck there, entranced in the moment until I heard Mr. Kang's voice hurry me along.
For the rest of the day, I wouldn't quite be able to focus. The same thought circled round and round in my mind; What will the party be like? I'm so inexperienced with parties. I can't believe its tomorrow night.
I had no clue what I was in for.
~
When I returned home after school, I threw myself on my bed, staring anxiously at the ceiling. What could I possibly wear? The thought buzzed around my mind like an angry bee, pestering me until I stood in front of my closet. This is gonna be a long night. I threw heaps of uniform shirts, skirts, and jackets around in search for a pink outfit. Soon, there was a huge mountain of clothes on my bedroom floor, my closet nearly empty. I was worried I would run out of luck, until my eyes landed on a sheer pink item hiding at the back of my closet.
Jackpot.
Part 2
Cute!
I assured myself as I gazed at the lustrous, pink glow of my reflection in the bathroom mirror. The soft, warm ambiance of the lighting reflected across the marble details of the bathroom, announcing the sheer affluence of the place. Loud, reverberated music echoed from the party outside of the bathroom, bringing a nostalgic feeling deep inside my chest as the beat of my favorite song boomed in the distance.
I traced a finger along the diamond headpiece I wore. It's long strands of silver rhinestones interlacing themselves all throughout my hair, sparkling in the bathroom lighting. The headpiece matched my chunky, diamond heart-shaped choker and earrings since it came together as a set.
As I hummed to the song, I glanced over my makeup to see if it needed any touch ups. The hot pink shimmery eyeshadow I wore glittered in the mirror, along with the silver heart-shaped rhinestone that adorned the top of cheek. Of course, I topped off the sparkly look with my favorite lip tint. My makeup went perfectly with my outfit; every ounce of it pink and glittery, as instructed by my lab partner.
"Don't forget to wear pink..." The memory of his voice trickled into my mind.
So I did as he said; I wore a pale pink, satin crop top with a sheer ribbon that fanned out over my chest, accompanied by a light pink feathery shawl which draped behind my shoulders as it pleased. This combo revealed my skin in a classy way, showcasing my collarbones due to the thin straps of my top.
On my bottom half, I wore a pale pink fuzzy mini skirt and some high heeled, pink faux leather boots which rose to just below my kneecap. I topped the look off with a pair of long, sheer pink gloves which added an elegant touch to my outfit.
Being so used to wearing the same old school clothes, I felt earthshakingly confident for the first time in a while.
I looked down at glowing, circular LED light which was pinned to my top. The pin had a number three on it, the bubbly number shining brightly. Upon arrival to the party, everyone received one of these pins with a different number on it. To my understanding, it would be used for some sort of "event." Or at least that's what the club employee explained as he handed me mine at the door. I was unsure as to what it was, but I was definitely curious to find out.
I unhinged my small pink purse, pulling out a thin glass bottle of a sweet scented fragrance and spritzed a small amount onto the left and right side of my neck, as well as my wrist. Running some fingers through the curls in my hair, I took one last good look at myself before I decided to head back out into the crowded, yet exciting Valentine's day party that Choi Beomgyu himself planned, set up, and was now hosting at The Lake Club.
~
As I walked out of the bathroom into the raving crowds, I realized how impressive the the party decor was. Fluorescent heart-shaped lights, similar to the material of my pin, dangled across the ceiling in their pink glow. As well as shiny, holographic streamers which practically drowned the walls in their shininess. Pink and red balloons floated all around and above the bar, each balloon reading an item off the drink menu. I raised my eyebrows, impressed at the creativity.
Did he put these up himself?
It seemed super professional too. This being my first "real" party I had ever gone to, I could practically feel the lavishness. My reason of astonishment was the location; The Lake Club aka the ritziest club in town which celebrities mostly rented out for their parties and gatherings. I darted my eyes around the place, landing on a long, elevated runway that parted the crowd in two. The runway was connected to the DJ booth. I wonder what the runway is used for?
As my eyes lingered on the DJ booth, I was star-struck at the realization of one of the most famous DJ's in the city, Choi Yeonjun.
He held a headphone over his ear, strategically pressing buttons and maneuvering his equipment while grooving with the beat, rocking his head up and down in rhythm with the catchy music. His DJ booth was perched up above the ecstatic crowd which consisted of the people from my school. I couldn't really recognize anyone, especially with the flashing lights that bounced off of the walls, making it hard to focus on any one person.
All types of bass-heavy music blasted through the crowd as I stood there, observing their silhouettes jump and move energetically in tune with the beat. I watched as some couples danced, almost dropping my jaw at how sexual some of their dance moves were. It was something I had definitely only seen in movies, not in real life. It wasn't something I stared at for long, though.
I moved my eyes around some more to take in all the pink decor, observing as jocks chugged alcoholic beverages under the shiny balloons, and as girls took group selfies in all of their rosy attire. I moved my wonder-struck eyes from place to place, simply taking in all of the ambiance.
And then,
I spotted him.
A pang of nerves twisted their way into my stomach. Yet, I couldn't help but observe him from afar.
He stood there, leaning against a velvet sofa as he chatted with his entourage of guy friends. I spotted Huening amongst the group, his body moving in constant laughter as he jokingly hit another guy on the shoulder. But Beomgyu's stature and pink glow stood out from them all, so similar to one of a prince.
His outfit looked like one of a prince, too. It was striking; he wore a soft pink, lacy textured coat with details of gold sequins on the shoulders and a bright red heart on the left pocket. The coat in itself was dashingly royal. A slightly, more muted pink were the color of his pants, which were tucked into a pair of tall white boots. The combination hugged his figure nicely, accentuating his height.
But that wasn't all. His ashy blonde hair seemed almost purple in the lighting, framing his face perfectly like always, bringing out the best of his features. A thin, black choker tightly hugged his neck, accentuating his adam's apple.
Why am I so tense all of a sudden?
I hadn't realized I was staring for so long when I felt his deep brown eyes suddenly dart over to meet mine. His attention boarded into me, causing my face to burn. I tried to find some sort of comfort but I stood there alone, so I resorted to my phone, looking down at my empty lock screen. After a few seconds, I flicked my eyes back up to him out of curiosity, to discover that he was on his phone too.
My phone began to vibrate as it lit up with a call, drawing my eyes back down to my screen.
Beomgyu (Lab Partner) is calling.... accept | decline
Earlier today, I had discovered that on the back-side of the piece of paper with the party information, his number was written on it in his familiar penmanship. I noticed it this morning as I typed the party address in my phone, I also created a new contact for him.
My heart pounded as I swiped to accept his call.
"Hello?" I answered, forcing my voice loud enough to be heard over the blaring music.
"Y/n. M/n. L/n, are you gonna make me come over there and get you? Because I will." He spoke in a deep, declaring voice over the line. My heart pounded harder at the fact that he pronounced my entire name perfectly.
I shifted around in my heels, daring to glance over at him only to find he was already looking at me. I had been thinking of a reply.
I'll play his little game.
"Ouch!" I slightly bent my ankle, trying my best to mock a mediocre sprain. "Oh no! It looks like you'll have to come and get me," I replied in an innocent voice, throwing a hand over my forehead helplessly. He smirked, lifting a brow. We both obviously knew it was fake. But it made our little game all the more enticing.
The other line beeped as he ended the call, and I watched as he dismissed himself from his friend group, sliding his phone into his pants pocket smoothly.
As he walked closer, I picked up on the little details of his appearance. Small specs of glitter sparkled underneath and around his eyes, as well as some black eyeliner which was smokily smudged along his waterline, making his eyes all the more attractive. His whole being glittered in the pink ambiance of the party lights. I then noticed that his glowing pin read the number thirteen.
Once reached me, he did something I was not expecting- at all.
He hooked an arm under my legs, practically sweeping me off my feet, and carried me bridal-style across the dance floor. I was speechless.
"Beomgyu what on earth are you doing!!!!" I whisper-yelled, hitting his arm begging him to put me down. My cheeks glowed red as I felt stares from the crowd burning into me. He walked over to the bar and set me down on a stool, swiveling it to face him so that he stood in-between my legs. A cold sweat dispersed itself all throughout my body as my heart nearly beat out of my chest.
I think my plan of trying to cutely-fake-a-sprained-ankle backfired on me.
"Oh you poor thing, you obviously couldn't walk because of that ankle of yours, so I carried you." He placed his palm on the bar table and leaned into it, inching his face closer to mine. "And now it's time to drink the pain of that injured ankle away," he added, moving his face even closer. I picked up on his seductive aura, his eyes so deeply focused into mine. He was enjoying our little game.
I had second thoughts. Did it really backfire? Although I was stunned and embarrassed, something in me enjoyed the thrill.
I swallowed the knot that formed in my throat. I wasn't much of a drinker. In fact, I have never gotten fully drunk. The last time I drank was at a small house party with some friends years ago. But, I knew as a fact that it took a lot to get me drunk, since a few beers had close to no effect on me.
So what is there to lose?
"Yeah, you're right," I responded confidently, straightening my posture, not once taking my eyes off his.
Pretty soon, there were two shots before us. Never having done a shot before, I examined the short, clear glass, taking a whiff of the bitter scented liquid. I also paid mind to the small, heart shaped sprinkles floating in the liquid, which I found cute.
It can't be that bad, right?
I looked over at the daring boy, who now sat in a barstool, holding the glass loosely in his grasp.
"Ready?" he looked over at me, expectantly. I looked down at the clear liquid, swallowing the knot in my throat. My heat pounded profusely at what was to come. A million thoughts buzzed in my head; What if I have a bad reaction? My parents cannot find out about this. What if they find out?
I looked back at Beomgyu, nervousness evident in my expression.
"Wait- you've never?" he asked, looking down at my tense hands. I nodded my head quickly.
"Well, of course the perfect princess hasn't had a drink. Always working hard for that scholarship," he cooed, setting his glass down. I was unable to tell his tone of voice, but his aura was darkened in a sort of mystery.
"Here, let me help you since it's your first." He got up out of his seat, picking my shot glass up and stood behind me as I sat nervously in the bar stool.
"Tilt your head back." His voice called from behind me.
This enticed a concern from me, "Wait what?!" I implored.
"Just trust me. Do it," he demanded in a softer voice. I closed my eyes, taking in a breath. Calm down Y/n. You need to let loose sometimes.
I did as he instructed and tilted my head back. Since he stood behind me, the crown of my head now rested on his chest, my heart pounding. I looked up at him and our eyes met. He looked funny from this upside-down angle and I let out a small giggle, noticing his eyes crinkle as he let out a small laugh himself. My heart slightly jumped, cheeks basking in their usual red glow. The only time I had witnessed him laugh was yesterday when we worked on the lab, but I hadn't ever seen his face express as much joy as laughter. It was a sight to see.
Soon, his smile faded, replaced with his familiar sultry expression.
"Open your mouth," he demanded, slightly tugging at my bottom lip with his index finger. My face burned hotter. At his command, I parted my lips, opening my mouth a comfortable amount, not too wide or else I would feel more embarrassed than I already was. I felt his fingers hold onto my chin as he neared the cup to my mouth, the cool glass gracing my bottom lip.
"Bottoms up," he mumbled, and then emptied the glass into my mouth.
I immediately sat upright at the feeling of the bitter liquid burning my throat. Squeezing my eyes shut, I placed my hands on the bar table, bracing myself as I swallowed the liquid in one large gulp. Once it was all gone, I stuck my tongue out as proof of ingestion.
"Blehhhh," I shook my head, wiping my mouth clean with a napkin. I looked over at him as he returned to his bar stool, that rare smile of amusement back on his face.
"You should've seen your face!" He pointed at me, covering the lower half of his expression with his other hand as he let out a giggle.
Why is he covering his smile? He shouldn't do that.
All sense of reasoning must've left my head when I said exactly what I was thinking.
"Why do you always cover your laugh? Don't do that," I blurted, reaching up to remove his hand from his face.
Am I already tipsy?
Just as he opened his mouth to say something back, a group of about five or six girls began crowding around Beomgyu, pushing me out of my seat. I heard a couple of their snickers as they stared at me, envy prevalent in their eyes. One of them touched Beomgyu on the shoulder, moving her body too close to him. My heart rate accelerated.
"Beomgyu ahhh!! Can you give us a shot like that too??" A couple of their high-pitched voices rang, irritating the crap out of me. I was mostly annoyed at their squeaky voices and the fact that I was practically booted out of my seat.
I expected this to happen sooner or later, though. The fact that me, a peasant in the eyes of the filthy rich girls that attended our school was with hanging out with the prince of the school Choi Beomgyu was simply mind-boggling to them.
Before I could do anything to reclaim my seat, I felt an arm sling around my neck.
"Hard pass," he said, practically shooing the girls away with the gesture of his hand. At that, the girls gave me one final glare, like daggers, but I simply didn't care what they thought. A small grin found its way onto my face as Beomgyu's arm continued to hang around my neck.
"Well that was pretty smooth," I chuckled, looking up at him as retracted his arm. "You probably do that a lot," I added, lightheartedly.
He looked at me with the same furrowed brows, the ones he used on me when he had his phone out in class yesterday.
"What's up with you and thinking I've had a bunch of girlfriends?" He inquired, his tone more serious.
"I mean, you are pretty popular around school, no?" I asked, hoping not to come off as annoying. But it was true, he was the most popular guy in the whole school. He looked down at his untouched shot glass, shrugging.
"Yeah, I guess it's true. But I don't really see it that way. I just try to live and enjoy life, no matter my social standing," he added after a moment.
I nodded in understanding at his response. The truth was, I felt the exact same way as him about myself. I probably had one of the lowest social standings in terms of popularity, but I didn't really care. I just kept living my life, focusing on school, and doing things that made me happy. That's why I found myself at Beomgyu's party, sitting next to him while enjoying his company.
"That's why I'm sitting here with you, I like being around people who make me happy," I blurted out, immediately realizing what I had just said. I scratched the back of my head, giving him an awkward smile. I guess this shot has completely taken away my filter.
But it's not too bad, I thought to myself. I'm just simply speaking my mind and I still have almost all of my self-control, which is all that matters to me. I turned to Beomgyu who, for the third time, wore a smile on his face. He looked so pretty in the dim lighting of the bar, his attractive lips curling up, revealing a small dimple on his cheek that I hadn't seen before. His grin was contagious because before I knew it, I was mirroring his expression.
I looked down at his full shot glass, "Aren't you gonna show me how it's done?" I asked, gesturing at his glass with a quizzical expression.
"Oh, I almost forgot. Let me show you how it's done, Miss L/n," he replied, bringing the shot glass out in front of him, gesturing it in my direction as to say "cheers." Then in one smooth motion, he threw his head back and emptied the glass. By the time he brought his head back up, he has already swallowed the liquid, keeping a stoic expression.
"How did you do that!" I exclaimed excitedly, my mouth ajar in surprise. He set his empty glass on the table with a clink, shrugging his shoulders. "It just gets easier every time," he responded.
I giggled and a small period of silence fell between us as we looked out at the scene of the party before us.
"Have you written the thesis for our science lab yet?" I randomly asked as the thought had just passed through my mind. What better time to ask? I pinched the bridge of my nose in between my fingers in annoyance at my own question.
He side-eyed me, not even giving me a response, but instead, offered me his hand.
"C'mon y/n its obvious your life revolves around your studies. Hell, you probably dream about math problems and science theses." I giggled at his remark.
"But I think it's time for you to take a break from constantly thinking about school. I think its time to dance," he added matter of factly, holding his hand hand out in front of my face. I was a bit stunned. I hadn't danced with a guy before, let alone tipsy at a ritzy party.
Before I could allow the buzzing thoughts to enter my mind like always, I placed my hand into his and let him take the lead.
This is going to be interesting.
Part 3
I felt the burning stares of girls as they whispered god knows what, but I simply shook it off. Being on the dance floor with Beomgyu left no room to think about anything else. All I could do was focus on his sparking eyes and watch him move like never before.
I wasn't sure if it was the alcohol or the elation of the moment, but something about Beomgyu seemed different. It seemed like he was happier and more loose, moving his body excitedly with the beat of the song. He had completely let down all of his exterior walls, showing the bright, shining boy that he was deep down. Something about his bright and charismatic aura brightened the room even more than it already was, making him so appealing to me that I simply stared at him in awe as we danced. I wanted to stay right here with him the entire night.
And I did.
Suddenly, the music went quiet and the lights dimmed as several spotlights shined onto the DJ booth. The electronic screen in front and behind the booth shifted to a screen that read 'Buy your Valentine' in cursive font. I wondered what was about to go down.
"I'd like everyone's attention as we officially begin the long awaited Valentine's Day Party!!" I turned to see DJ, Choi Yeonjun strut down the long platform that extended through the crowd like a runway. Yeonjun threw an arm up, enticing the crowd to cheer and clap excitedly.
"Before we get started, I'd like to invite you all to download the app on your phone called CUPIDS PARTY, I'll give you one minute!" An animated clock was projected onto the far wall, beginning to count backwards from sixty seconds.
I didn't ask any questions and just downloaded the app, opening it at the ten second mark to see a blank heart appear on the screen which read; "Select your valentine's pin number."
I remembered the glowing number thirteen on Beomgyu's jacket. Before I could type anything in, Yeonjun continued.
"You will use this app to vote for your valentine; the person you would like to spend the rest of the night with! Whoever puts in the highest amount of money wins that person and they become your valentine!" The crowd cheered, whooped, and clapped.
So its like an auction? My thoughts were halted by the DJ's voice again.
"Cupid is here with us tonight!" he continued as a second spotlight shined onto a tall girl standing on the far end of the platform. She wore a full face mask covered in diamonds, her hair up in a high ponytail to showcase her large, white wings. She held a fluffy, pink bow and arrow, drawing it back to point at the crowd.
"Cupid? I have a question for you. Who will you choose first?" he asked in a quizzical voice, turning to face the winged girl who was now scanning the crowd, ready to release one of her fuzzy arrows. I froze as she pointed in our direction, but I was relieved when she released her arrow at a group of guys standing next to us; the same group which Beomgyu had been with up until my arrival.
The crowd began pointing at a a tall, black haired boy who looked around nervously as his numbered pin began flashing colors. So this is what the pins will be used for, my question was finally answered.
"That's my friend Choi Soobin," Beomgyu chimed from behind me and I swiveled my neck to look at him. His jaw was prominent as I stood practically underneath his chin looking up at his flawless skin, lost in his beauty.
"This is your party so.. you came up with this right?" I asked, genuinely curious as to what was happening. He nodded proudly.
"Does cupid strike any random person?" I continued with another question, scratching my head.
"Yes, any random person." He responded, staring ahead as the tall, black haired boy walked up onto the platform.
"What happens now?" I asked a third question.
"Just watch," he placed two hands on each side of my head, turning it so I faced forward. His hands returned to rest at his sides, occasionally bumping my own hands as the crowd shifted. The raven-haired boy was now on the platform as the crowd went wild, cheering him on. "Let's go Soobin!" groups of guys cheered, encouraging the shy boy to walk proudly.
"Okay okay okay!" Yeonjun interrupted the screaming crowd, "What do we all think of this handsome man?" he questioned, enticing the crowd to cheer even more loudly than before.
The boy smiled at the crowd, awkwardly putting a hand on the back of his neck and heartily laughed in surprise of all the cheers.
"Choi Soobin, I have a gift for you! I am going to gift you.. the runway. Give it your all!!" Yeonjun cheered, lightly pushing the tall boy as a cue to begin walking down the extended platform. The crowd cheered as the shy boy walked as confidently as he could down the runway, laughing occasionally along the way. When he reached the end, he held a peace sign up to his eye which enticed a collectively loud scream from the girls.
I looked to my right to see a girl was typing profusely on the Cupid's Party app, typing in Soobin's pin number and then scrolling over the numbers until she reached the number 1000.
She pressed send, and a pink screen appeared which read; you have paid $1000 for #37. A heart then appeared on her screen which contained the number thirty seven in it. Words appeared under the heart which read, Congratulations! My guess was that she had won her night with Choi Soobin when she began screaming and pumping her fist in the air.
When Soobin's time was over, he exited the runway with a smile and some pats on the back from his classmates. The girl who stood next to me was gone, and she now stood next to him as they happily linked arms.
I looked up and over at Beomgyu who was typing something into his phone, not before long until he stuffed it in his pocket at realization of my gaze. I swiveled my head forward at the sound of the DJ's voice.
"Who's next Cupid?" Yeonjun called out over the microphone, making my heart beat as fast as it possibly could.
Something deep inside of me hoped I did not get called.
But another part was intrigued.
I swore I made direct eye contact with Cupid when I saw her release the arrow directly at me, and I felt a small vibration come from my pin as it was now brightly flashing. The crowd's attention suddenly boarded into me all at once as their immense cheers almost blew out my ears. I looked back at Beomgyu, who smiled at me, giving my hand a small squeeze.
"You got this," he mouthed, as I was slowly carried by the crowd's cheers. Before I knew it, I was walking up the slick steps up to the platform, doing my best to control my hands from violently shaking.
"Ohhh who's this beauty?" Yeonjun's voiced echoed throughout the club and because of how close I was to him, I could hear his real voice as well. I quickly became aware of my nervous posture so I straightened up immediately, putting on a confident front which was difficult, but doable. The good thing about confidence is that no one knows if its real or not. Right now, I was going to make them all believe it was 100% real. I smiled brightly at Yeonjun, leaving him wide eyed.
"Whew! Strut your stuff, babe!" He yelled, enticing a roar from the crowd as I began to strut, one foot in front of the other down the runway.
Being one who got no attention on a day to day basis, this felt so surreal to me. I felt like I didn't do anything special to deserve all of their attention. But I figured I'd live by my life motto to just live and enjoy life, no matter my social standing.
I relaxed as much as I could, progressively getting more into it. I swayed my hips smoothly, side to side as I strutted and threw a hand up in the air which enticed all the more cheers. As I neared the end of the runway, I thought of what pose I could possibly do. As I now stood at the end of the platform, I looked over at Beomgyu, who stared back at me, phone clutched firmly in his grip, bottom lip sucked between his teeth.
I turned in his direction, throwing a hip out to the side as I put both my index fingers and thumbs into a heart, placing them on my lips and them threw my hands out to the crowd, making a heart kiss gesture.
I had no idea how many screams this would entice, until I could practically feel the runway shake from all the jumping from the crowd. As I turned to walk back, I heard some female voices scream things like "Awww!" and "She's so cute!" making my heart flutter in happiness.
As I neared the DJ booth, Yeonjun winked at me and I waved at him, exiting the runway. I had no idea how much adrenaline I had been functioning on until I felt my legs practically go numb as I walked back to my spot in the crowd with Beomgyu. My hands shaked profusely and my legs felt weak. But at least I was good at faking confidence.
As I approached him, his eyes dark as he held out his phone to show me the bright pink heart on his screen; the number three within it with the words underneath which read; Congratulations! I looked down at my pin to confirm that three was indeed my number. I gasped, throwing a hand over my mouth, smiling widely. My heart fluttered at the fact that I got his vote. I was unsure of what to do, so I thew my arms around his neck in a hug. I felt him return the hug, pulling me closer to him. I inhaled his faint sweet scent, simply enjoying the moment until suddenly...
I felt his pin vibrate in between us.
Part 4
Cupid had released her fuzzy arrow at him, making the crowd go wild.
"Your turn!" I giggled, pulling away from the hug as I squeezed his arm. "You got it," I smiled up at him. He gave me a small wink before making his way to the front, my heart racing for him.
When I thought my cheers were loud, I was seriously understating the word loud. At the sight of him walk onto the platform, the crowd went absolutely berserk. From what I could calculate, his cheers were about 1000 times louder and more frantic than mine, which was very much expected. I thought I was going to go deaf when the girl behind me screamed at the top of her lungs. I could've sworn the windows would shatter. Many of the girls began running to the front of the stage, but I stayed in my spot towards the back.
"If you go on wikipedia and look up the definition for the word sexy, the search results will quite literally show the face of this man," Yeonjun's voice echoed amongst the crowd as he slung an arm around Beomgyu's neck, enticing the crowd's screams.
"Everyone, give it up for the sexiest man alive!!" Yeonjun ruffled Beomgyu's hair which only made it look better. The crowd went absolutely wild, mostly screams of girls which thunderously fulfilled Yeonjun's demand. I looked around at the crowd, a small smirk on my face knowing that the man they all fawned over had voted for me. But I didn't let that get to my head too much, I simply giggled at the fact that I only had about $50 in my bank account for the month. There was absolutely no way I would win the vote over these millionaires. For the hell of it, I decided to try and donate $5 just to see what happened. As I was typing in the number thirteen and the donation amount, I heard some girls complaining next to me.
"Why isn't it working??" "Did anyone else's app crash?" "Mine did!" "What's going on with the app?" It won't let me donate!" I heard their voices collectively grow louder. Glancing around to find that almost every girl in the room had a confused expression, I donated my measly $5 to see what would happen. My screen lit up, the number thirteen reflecting off of my eyeballs. The iconic Congratulations! appeared at the bottom of the screen. I smiled down at my phone. I'll discuss this with him later, I giggled to myself and looked ahead to watch Beomgyu's big appearance on the runway.
I focused onto his princely stature as he walked confidently down the platform, his hands stuffed in his pockets. Occasionally, he would wave at the crowd or put up a piece sign, which intensified the roar even more. As he inched the end of the runway, it felt as though time was traveling in slow motion when he struck his pose. He pushed a hand through his blonde hair, exposing his forehead momentarily as the strands fell back in place, showcasing his perfect face. His eyes scanned the crowd, landing on mine. I watched as he moved his hand to his lips, kissing his fingers and throwing his hand out, similar to my pose.
Then, my heart almost skipped a beat when he pointed at me, moving an imaginary spotlight onto where I stood as eyes from the crowd traveled onto me. At such a pose that was directed toward me, I was beginning to feel what seemed like a fangirl moment when I got butterflies at the sight of him, yelling out to cheer for him. He finished off his pose by scrunching his nose and lips into a cute-but-sexy expression, fluttering his fingers out towards the crowd. He spun around on his heel, enticing the absolute loudest cheer I had ever heard in my entire life. In fact, I had to cover my ears to keep my eardrums from practically rupturing.
Yeonjun gave him a fist bump on his way out and I watched as a sea of both men and women ran up to him. Does this boy need his own security or something? I asked myself, entirely serious as I watched him struggle to leave the stairs. I took this as my cue to try and do what I could to help him out of there, so I shoved my way through the crowd.
"Everyone back away from the prince, please," Yeonjun demanded in a stern tone from the microphone. I pushed my way to the center of the crowd, linking my arm with Beomgyu's and pulled him through the crowd.
"Its the hot couple!" I heard a male voice call from the crowd, drawing my eyes to the shy boy from earlier, Soobin. I couldn't help but laugh at his comment, and he smiled down at the ground when he noticed I had heard him.
When we were finally free from the crowd, I walked Beomgyu back to our spot in the back, but he kept on walking, pulling me with him to the bar which was further from the buzz of people.
"Are you getting another drink?" I asked, looking at him worriedly when I noticed how out of breath and overwhelmed he was from the crowd. He shook his head, dabbing the sweat off of his forehead with a napkin.
"Those people are insane, aren't they? Crazy we all go to the same school," he said, resting the side of his head on my shoulder as we sat in the same barstools from earlier.
"Yeah..I think you need your own security, Gyu. Seriously." I added, receiving a breathy chuckle from him. He looked up at me, a small grin on his face.
"I like it when you call me that," he added, resting a hand on the top of my leg. Without thinking, I placed my hand on top of his, thinking about the craziness that had just taken place. My mind stopped on a particular question I had been saving.
"Gyu, how come my app was the only one working when you went on stage?" I finally asked, furrowing my eyebrows curiously. He released air through his nose in a silent laugh, burying his head into my neck. I felt the familiar blush creep onto my cheeks at the feeling of his face on my exposed skin. He slowly inched his way up, moving his lips near my ear,
"Because I rigged it."
I nodded slowly, too focused on his warm breath. Then, his words finally seeped into my brain, causing a smirk to surface on my lips.
I knew it.
Part 5
When the cupid-runway-model-game had ended and the party had returned to its normalcy, I grabbed Beomgyu's hand, pulling him out of his barstool.
"C'mon Gyu, let's continue dancing where we left off!"
He followed behind, eager to dance like we did before. I could've sworn he was a different person from the one who had been assigned my lab partner yesterday. He was so much more affectionate towards me, smiling and dancing like nobody's business. But maybe he wasn't all that different, maybe he was just more comfortable around me now. The most comfortable I'd ever seen him.
But even then, I felt like we shared a connection as lab partners too.
We ran out to the slick dance floor, his hand in mine. As we danced along to the beat of every hype song imaginable, I couldn't help but feel even closer to him after the cupid event from earlier. It was obvious we'd built an even stronger connection just within the night. According to the app, Beomgyu and I were now each other's valentine, instructed to spend the rest of our night together. For right now, I just focused on dancing with him.
When the fast-paced pop songs played, we jumped up and down in the air, pumping our fists as our heart rates accelerated, pure euphoria coursing through our veins. Absolutely no one could remove our smiles even if they tried; my cheeks were even beginning to ache because of how big I was grinning. The lights strobed colorfully across his face, casting beautiful highlights and shadows onto his features as we moved in what felt like slow motion. I grabbed onto his hand, pumping it up in the air and he interlaced his fingers with mine. The moment felt absolutely perfect.
When the deeper-toned r&b songs blasted through the crowd, his aura seemed to shift into a more sultry one, and I could tell by the change in his dance moves as well. He rolled his body, dancing smoothly in tune with the lush beat, making sexy gestures and irresistible sexy facial expressions. He raked his fingers through his soft hair, his eyes darkening as he gazed at me. He motioned two fingers in a "come here" motion as he bit his bottom lip and lifted a mysterious eyebrow at me. My chest fluttered at his gesture; something about the way he bit his lip ignited something within me. I fulfilled his wish and strutted toward him, taking his hand as he pressed me close to him.
"Show me what you got," he whispered in my ear, his hot breath trickling its way down my neck. The moment felt hot as we breathed into each other's skin.
A flash of nerves zapped my stomach as I internally freaked out at his request, not knowing exactly what to do. But I calmed myself with a breath, reassuring myself to be confident and just go with the beat of the song, like I did earlier on the runway. I was beginning to feel like I was in my theatre improv 101 class, being suddenly put on the spot to showcase my skills. But this was different; I enjoyed it because my valentine made it fun.
I relaxed my body, taking a moment to briefly close my eyes and breathe deeply, feeling the vibrations of the bass in the song. I began by moving my hips, pressing them right up against his as I swayed them side to side. Then, I tossed my hair into a different direction, looking up at him through some pieces that messily fell on my face. I could sense that I looked hot, mainly because of the way his eyes were beginning to gloss over with a glint of lust.
The song faded into a darker r&b tune, one that made my skin almost break out in goosebumps as the deep beat interlaced perfectly into each other, making the moment all the more intense. He licked the corner of his lips as I graced his neck with the tips of my fingers, watching him shudder slightly at the chilling touch. I moved my shoulders and hips slowly, in tune with the music as I looked deeply into his eyes, giving him sultry expressions of my own to give him a taste of what it was like.
When I thought the moment couldn't get any more heated, it did. He slid an arm under his thick coat, removing it in one swift motion, throwing it aside onto a table. He wore a black sequins tank top underneath his white button up shirt and pink coat. I wondered if he wore it intentionally if he got hot under his outfit. It was certainly getting hot in here.
I didn't have much more time to think when I saw his muscular arms in the party lighting, which had now faded into a cool purple tone, accentuating the valleys of each muscle. I moved closer to him, gazing deeply into his deep brown eyes, which almost look black in the dark lighting. In this moment, it felt like we were the only two people amongst the raving crowd.
I began to get more into it, swinging my hips with more groove, and I suddenly decided to turn around, my back pressed to his chest as I swayed my hips against his crotch. I reached down to grab his hands, which rested at his sides, and placed them on the sides of my hips. He slightly hesitated, feeling the tensing of his stomach on my back. I turned my head to look over my shoulder up at him, nodding at him in assurance. I felt him relax as I slowly guided his hands to my hips, and he began to move his own hips side to side in tune with mine.
He heavily breathed against my neck as we moved slowly with the deep, echoing beat, his hot breath shivering my spine. I turned to look up at him over my shoulder and discovered that his eyes were closed, his face completely relaxed and his mouth slightly agape. I subconsciously pressed my thighs together at the sight of his beautiful face so close to mine, his plump lips drawing my attention.
But, I quickly had to turn my head forward when he leaned down to rest his chin on my shoulder. Otherwise, he would've crashed his chin right into my nose which would've definitely hurt.
"You're definitely showing me what you've got, y/n." He breathed into my shoulder, his voice melting in my ears like honey. I traced my fingers up his arms, inducing another shudder throughout his body as he let out a small, breathy laugh at his own reaction.
"I can't get enough of you," he breathed again, his husky voice echoing into my brain, bringing a warm flutter into my stomach. His touch was intoxicating and it was hard to decipher if I was drunk off of him, off of this moment, or if it was the little shot from earlier. But I could tell from the pounding of my heart, rational thoughts passing though my mind; I definitely wasn't drunk. These are real feelings.
I turned my body completely to face him, awakening him from my shoulder. His gaze smokily entered mine as we locked eyes, his hands moving to the small of my back. I couldn't help but ask him the question that pestered my mind.
"Beomgyu, are you drunk? Or do you really mean what you're doing and saying," I looked up at him with searching eyes, nervous for his response. My heart pounded so hard, genuinely worried that he would take my question the wrong way. But I really wanted to know if this was a real moment. I didn't want him to forget everything the next day or ignore me at school like i'm sure most guys do at these parties.
He tilted his head to the side, a slight confused look on his face. He shook his head, bringing me closer in his grasp. "Y/n, I hope I made it obvious enough that I don't see you as just a lab partner. Or as just a friend," he finally concluded, almost making my internal gasp audible. The pieces finally started coming together in my head, making me realize all those times I had stopped by the award in the school hallway just to get a glance at his gorgeous smile. He truly had swept me off my feet; both literally and figuratively.
The song slowly faded into a softer, ambient acoustic one, the pale pink lights signaling a slow song.
If it couldn't be more obvious, Yeonjun's voice came over the speaker. "People, it's time for the Valentine's slow dance," he said slowly, a hint of sensuality in his words as he intentionally deepened his voice through the mic.
I watched as several disco balls slowly lowered from the ceiling, their presence casting their silver gleam on the beautiful boy before me. He lowered his hands to the sides of my hips as I moved my arms to clasp around his neck; the typical slow dance arm placement. But this was anything from typical. This moment felt magical as we locked eyes, his doe eyes like a mirror as they reflected the glittering ball which hung above us.
I finally got around to addressing his statement from earlier. "You literally swept me off my feet, you know that?" I tilted my head back at him, my eyebrow raised as I waited for him to address the duality of my question. He dropped his head as a small giggle released from his mouth, looking at our shoes for a moment until he came back to look at me again.
"Yes, I literally swept you off your feet when I saw you and your 'sprained' ankle," exaggerating the word sprained because we both knew it part of our little game. We both laughed momentarily, recalling the moment
"Yes, literally. But figuratively as well, Gyu." He furrowed his eyebrows in perplexity, searching my eyes as he searched his mind. Then, his eyes softened into a smile when he figured it out. "You swept me off my feet," I repeated, the butterflies in my stomach evident on my face as I smiled warmly. I dropped my head into his chest as a sudden laugh burst out of my lips, recalling the memory of him carrying me bridal style across the dance floor while everyone stared, dumbfounded.
"I probably looked so stupid faking a sprained ankle.. you had to walk all the way over there to get me-" I laughed harder, feeling his chest move up and down in laugher as well, the sound of his adorable, bubbly laughter like music to my ears.
"Yeah it was funny, but look where it lead us," he added, a certain softness in his voice. I looked back up at him, taking a while to think about what he just said. We had been together the entire night; dancing, laughing, sharing some not so pg moments.. it had all been too good to be true. I smiled at the thought of our memories together, memories I was not expecting to create at all with him tonight; but it was something I would never ever forget. Something I will remember forever.
"Hey, do you wanna come over to my place after?" He asked softly, his large eyes searching mine as he gently smiled. The question made my heartbeat quicken, almost feeling excited at his asking. I nodded, smiling up at him.
"So, the dashing prince wants to show me his castle?" I wittily replied, giggling as I tilted my head inquisitively. He dropped his head in a small laugh, squeezing his eyes closed at my remark.
"Only if the dazzling princess sees fit," he replied, bending his knee behind him in a charming courtesy. I giggled at his gesture, finding him so genuinely adorable, but hot at the same time. His duality had me on edge, unsure of what his next move would be. I quickly realized that Beomgyu was someone I could spend hours with, without even realizing how fast time was passing. Someone I could always be myself with. I pressed my chin into the crook of his neck as we continued swaying to the soft tune of the slow song, sensing the warmth from his body seeping into mine. The scent of his skin drew me even closer to him in what seemed like a trance, intoxicated by his warmth. I wanted to stay here forever.
When the song ended, only then had I realized that we had been in the center of a spotlight for who knows how long, the sudden burst of cheers and claps awaking me from my trance. There were people crowded around us, and I assumed they had been watching us share our slow dance. I was unsure as to why, but I couldn't help but smile and look around at everyone as they whooped and clapped. I saw Soobin and Huening waving at us from a corner, their smiles shining like a ray of sun on us. I looked up at Beomgyu, his eyes on nobody else but me. He slowly leaned his lips down to my ear, his warm breath trickling onto my skin.
"You look so beautiful." The whisper sent a large flutter through my stomach, his words the most prominent amongst the hollers of the crowd. I looked down at our shoes, attempting at hiding the red tinge of my cheeks. I did my best to meet my eyes to his again.
"Ditto, Gyu," was what I managed to sputter out, brought aback by his compliment, but also wanting to compliment him back without seeming to flustered. I smiled sweetly, my eyes almost closing at how internally happy I felt. He looked down at our shoes, where my eyes had once been. But then he reached his hand up to his shoulder, grabbing one of my hands off and holding it, leading me off of the dance floor. I interlaced my fingers with his, the cheers of the crowd beginning to die down as we exited the dance floor. He grabbed his pink coat off of the table where it resided, slipping it back over his shoulders and we continued walking, hand in hand through the club.
I was unsure as to where we were going, but I just followed along, putting my trust in him. We made our way past the bar and past the bathrooms I once stood at, staring at his handsome princely figure across the lights, carrying my memories with me as we headed to the front door of the club. I could hear the patter of raindrops pelting the glass doors and falling steadily on the pavement of the main street. Beomgyu and I gave each other one look before shrugging and walking out into the rain, the cool breeze blowing onto my bare legs, but I didn't mind it; it felt nice.
"I figured we'd make our great escape from the mob," he chuckled, raking a hand through his hair as he threw his head back, enjoying the cold wind on his face. I agreed, not being much of an extrovert myself, my shoulders felt lighter without the constant vigilance of the crowd.
"Yeah, it was getting stuffy in there too. It's nice out here." I added, throwing my head back like he had done, feeling the wind rake its cool fingers through my scalp.
"My house is this way," He called, giving my hand a small tug, which was still intertwined with his. We walked through streetlamp-filled streets which illuminated the darkness, large houses lining the way. I observed the houses closely, eyes darting around intrigued by the brilliant architecture of each one. I wondered which was his.
Part 6
I watched the warm stream of water as it trickled out of the silver faucet, filling the large tub I lay in. A thick layer of bubbles completely covered the tub, only my head visible above the water. When I figured the tub was filled enough, I turned the knobs of the faucet off, sighing in warm bliss as I laid back, feeling the hot water slowly soothe away the ache of my legs and feet from dancing all night. I glanced over at my pink, high heeled boots which stood by the door in the heap of my clothes, blaming them for the pain they caused me.
Moments before this, Gyu and I had walked hand in hand in the rain, soon arriving at the large, wood-sculpted front door of his house. We tiptoed inside what looked like some sort of millionaire's mansion, my head swiveling in every direction intrigued by all the elegant decor. He told me that his family was away on vacation, which calmed my nerves of being here in the first place. Me; a sore, shivering mess, cold and drenched from the rain, had made it obvious that I was practically an ice cube, frozen to the core. Beomgyu decided it was best that I take a warm bath.
"You'll catch a cold in those wet clothes. Here let me run you a hot bath," were his exact words.
So here I was, warming up in Choi Beomgyu's bathtub. Something I'd never expected in my entire life.
I took a long look around the large bathroom, my eyes traveling over the wooden walls, accompanied by the flicker of candles gleaming against the marble accents. His bathroom was fancy-looking, yet still felt comfortable and homey. I hadn't been into his room yet, which made me wonder if it had the same cozy vibe of his bathroom. My thoughts halted when I heard a small knock at the door.
"I brought my valentine some tea," he called from the other side, his voice muffled by the door. My heart raced at his kind gesture.
"Aww okay!" I realized my tipsiness had completely worn away when my mind began buzzing with thoughts of him coming in while i'm butt ass naked under the bubbles. I was unsure of what to say.
"Give me a sec-" I began, but the door was already swung open as he was walking in.
I chuckled when I saw that he had a hand over his eyes, shielding his view while blindly walking over to the tub with a small, bear-shaped ceramic mug. He took his hand away from his eyes to feel for his surroundings, keeping his eyes sewn tightly shut. My smile grew. His hand blindly felt for the ledge of the bathtub, just inches away from my bare skin, making my stomach twirl in nervousness. He set the steaming mug with a clink onto the ledge of the bathtub.
"Thank you!" I replied to his kindness, my voice echoing through out the bathroom.
He nodded, returning his hand to cover his eyes. I scooted my back to the wall of the tub, bringing my knees to my chest to shield my breast. The bubbles already did a good job at shielding away the rest of my naked body.
"Gyu, it's okay to open your eyes. The bubbles cover everything," my voice echoed again.
His eyebrows rose inquisitively, tilting his head. "You sure it's okay?" he asked, curiosity lacing his voice. "Mhm!" I replied, picking up the hot mug by its ear.
I watched as he slowly inched his fingers apart, barely peeking through them as if he was fearful to look. Soon enough, he took his hand away from his eyes, bringing it down to his side and sighed in relief to see that the bubbles really did cover all of me. I sat there, looking up at him as I sipped my steaming tea.
"Mmm! What kind of tea is this? It's so good," I peered into the cup curiously, genuinely so impressed with the tea as I felt its mintiness cool my throat. I had been so intrigued with the tea, I didn't notice that he hadn't answered my question.
I looked back up at him to find that he was smiling, my eyes landing directly on his. I awkwardly laughed, looking down at the bubbles on my knees as my cheeks burned. It was hard to swallow the fact that I was pretty much naked in front of him.
"It's vanilla peppermint." he finally added, taking a seat on the ledge of the bathtub, increasing the speed of my heart rate.
"You look cute sitting like that, holding my mug," he continued, the same smile returning to his face. My lips immediately drew into a grin, giggling as I looking down at the water shyly.
"Thank you, Gyu," I responded with his favorite endearment of his name, his eyes also shyly falling to gaze at the water.
I couldn't help but think of how handsome he looked in the soft glow of the candlelight. The small glitters under his eye sparkled as the candle flame danced around, also illuminating the red shimmers on his pink coat. I noticed that his black eyeliner was slightly smeared from the rain, making his eyes irresistibly smoky. His hair, also messy and frizzed up from the rain.
To say he looked good would be an understatement.
He looked fucking hot.
I watched the flame of the candles dance in his dark eyes, only now realizing that our eyes had been glued to each other's for quite a while. I shifted in the water and my heart raced at the thought of the bubbles slowly fading away to reveal my body. With the fact that he was so close, I wouldn't doubt he'd be quick to notice it too. I pressed my knees closer to my chest, feeling my heart as it beat quickly on my thigh.
"I had a lot of fun tonight," he broke the silence with his deep, smooth voice, echoing throughout the spacious room. My breathing halted when he gazed down at the bath water, dipping one of his long, dainty fingers in to trace around the bubbles near my leg.
"Yeah, I had so much fun too," I responded after a while, gulping the the knot that formed in my throat from my nerves. I took a slow sip from my mug, continuing to observe his movements in the water.
"You should've seen the way everyone was voting for you when you walked the runway. Hell, even Choi Yeonjun cast his vote," he added lost in thought, looking out at the water.
I raised my eyebrows in astonishment. The DJ can vote?
I kept my eyes on Beomgyu's, now, 4 fingers which skimmed the bubbles.
"And the way you smiled when you realized that I voted for you," he quietly giggled. I warmly smiled at the memory, setting the mug down on the ledge. His giggle had drawn my eyes up to his smiling face, eyes sparkling as he looked down at the water, and then over to meet mine.
"I'm the luckiest guy," he added, gazing directly into my eyes. I felt as though his eyes were pulling me into a trance with their dark mystery, like I was staring into the deep ocean trying to find the bottom. I looked at him in utter and complete awe.
"I'm the luckiest girl," I added, smiling as I reminisced the special moments we shared at the party. After such a long period of pure eye contact, I felt like neither of us had even blinked. Our eyes refused to break apart. I felt his warm fingers, wet from the water, skim mine, which floated by my side. My face grew hot as I watched his fingers trace over my palm.
"Can I ask you something?" he inquired, scanning my face with his dark brown eyes. All I could do was nod. The tension weighed a ton on my shoulders, practically restricting my voice box from its crushing pressure.
His slightly sucked the corner of his bottom lip into his mouth, biting at the soft skin as his eyes traveled down to my own lips.
"Can I kiss you?" he asked, his deep voice almost in a whisper. My cheeks felt like they could catch on fire with how hot they were, burning with the heat of both the steamy water and the seductive man before me. My heart strummed against my chest as the tension reached its all time high.
I slowly nodded. "Yes," I responded in a whisper, almost inaudible to the ear. But he heard it.
He bent over the ledge of the bathtub to cup the side of my face. The warmth of his touch sparked a fire within me, spreading its heat all throughout my body. His face inched close to mine ever so slowly, until the gap between our lips closed.
His soft, full lips wrapped around my own, blissfully intertwining in unison. The fire within me had sparked even more, feeling as my heart pounded with each passing moment our lips locked. Our noses brushed as he slowly pulled away from the deep kiss. I opened my eyes to meet his, which were mere inches from mine, glittering in the candlelight as they searched my own. This was the final piece to the puzzle; kissing him was something I never knew I wanted, no- needed until now. Everything felt absolutely perfect.
I crashed my lips back onto his for a second kiss, slowly intermingling our wet lips into a deep, deliciously intoxicating kiss. He came back for another, and then another, until we weren't stopping for anymore breaks. Our lips danced in one continuous kiss, enticing a steamy make out. I shifted in the tub, sitting up on my knees, not giving a shit that my naked body was now exposed. The fire burning inside me desired to be as close to him as I could. I sensed the cool air hit my torso and chest as the bubbles slid down my skin. I wrapped my arms around his neck, pulling him even closer than before. At realization that I was sitting upright, he placed his cool hands on my bare hips, inviting goosebumps to pelt all around my body.
"Is it okay if I touch you?" he softly asked in between kisses, breathing in each other's heavy breaths. My heart fluttered at the thought of his desire to pleasure me, igniting the flame to burn hotter inside me.
"Please do," I assured him, stroking my fingers through his soft hair as we passionately kissed.
At this, he slowly ran his fingers up my back, wet with bubbles, intensifying my goosebumps even more. His hands found their way to my ass, gently grabbing a handful, before making their way down to the back of my thighs. I slightly gasped as I felt his fingers crawl up the insides of my thighs, welcoming a second heart beat. Soon he made his way to my wetness, gently rubbing my clit with two fingers in a slow, circular motion which coaxed a soft moan from my lips.
He pulled away from the kiss to watch my dazed expression, biting his lip as the sound of my moans echoing throughout the bathroom as he inserted a finger into me, pumping in and out slowly. If it couldn't get any better, he used his thumb to continue rubbing my throbbing clit as he curled his fingers up to my g-spot, a loud moan bubbling from my throat as a result. I arched my back at the immense pleasure of his fingers, holding myself steady with my firm grasp on his shoulders. I ran my fingers down his textured coat, sliding one side off of his arm and he removed the rest, falling with a gentle thud on the floor.
"Is it okay if I touch you?" I returned the question, desperate to please him as much as he was me.
"Of course," he replied against my lips in a breathy whisper.
I took that as my cue to run my hand down his torso, notifying him as to where I was headed. He sighed in delight as I rubbed a hand over the hardness that tented his pants. Just then, an idea came to me.
I gently pulled his forehead to my neck, placing my lips to his ear. "Why don't you join me?" I whispered, nibbling the corner of his ear. I sensed he was all in, when his body jolted at the sensation of my warm mouth on his ear as he began tugging at the material of his sequins tank top which glittered vibrantly against the tub wall. I helped slide his textured shirt over his head in one smooth motion, revealing the toned upper half of his body. I ran a hand down his arm, feeling his muscles under my grasp as I gave them a small squeeze. His body jolted at the sensation of my fingers down his torso, noticing as small goosebumps pelted his skin under my touch.
Then, I made my way to his light pink pants; the ones which drew my attention to his beautiful figure when I first saw him at the party. Before undoing his belt, I rubbed my palm gently over his hardened member, causing him to suck in a breath through his teeth. I looked up at him curiously as I hovered my hand over his pants, watching his eyes fill with even more need for my touch.
At the sight of his dazed expression, I made it my mission to give him all the pleasure he desired and more; to make him feel like he was on cloud 9. When I undid his belt and unbuttoned his pants, hooking a finger under the elastic of his boxers and pulling them down, his member sprung up so quickly it nearly hit my chin before pressing completely flat up against his lower stomach. His tip glistened with pre cum in the candlelight.
I couldn't believe that I had made him this hard in such a short amount of time, but at the same time, I felt the second heartbeat of my clit pulsate rapidly, creating more wetness than ever before. We both wanted each other so bad and it was so obvious by our bodily autonomy.
He stepped out of his pants, and before he could get in the tub with me, I stopped him by gently grabbing his torso, placing a trail of butterfly kisses on his hip bone. Then I trailed more kisses around, leading closer and closer to his hard-on. I looked up at him as I placed a kiss on his tip, slowly licking down his length and back up. At this, he threw his head back in pleasure, a low moan escaping his lips. I took his entire member into my mouth slowly, my lips stretching as much as they could over his size. We locked eyes as his tip hit the back of my throat, my eyes watering as I felt myself begin to choke on his length. His half open eyes glimmered with lust as he brought his hand down to grasp gently at my hair.
"Fuck- you feel so good" he moaned breathily, his deep voice making my thighs squeeze together in the water.
I swirled my tongue around his tip once more before pulling his hand down towards me, signaling for him to climb into the bathtub. He got in, kneeling down in front of me as we sweetly kissed, getting sloppier by the second. He placed his hand on my back, lowering me down to rest my head on the wall behind the tub. With his other hand, he fondled my breasts under the water, the sensation of my nipples between his fingers intensifying both of my heartbeats. He kissed my neck, trailing wet kisses all around and onto my chest, taking one of my breasts into his mouth and swirling my bud around with his tongue. I watched as his plump lips sucked bright red hickeys all over my neck, leaving me infatuated with his pretty markings on my chest.
This sensation was pure bliss, something I'd never felt before. I wasn't sure when to tell him this, though. I just kept going along with what I thought he would like, pretending like I knew what I was doing. As we kissed with him on top, I felt his rock hard member nudge my stomach, making us both aware of another option we had.
"Do you want to?..um," I asked hesitantly into his lips, unsure of his response. But with each of our heart rates beating as quick as the other's, what we both wanted was obvious.
"That's only if you're comfortable with it," he added reassuringly, reaching up to stroke my chin before placing a soft kiss onto my lips. I searched deeply into the smoky abyss of his eyes, knowing for sure this was something I wanted to do. But there was something I needed to tell him first.
"Um...Gyu. There's something I need to tell you," I looked away, unsure of how to formulate the words. He nodded as he awaited me to continue, comfortingly stroking my jaw with the back of his nails.
"I've never um.. this is my first time," I finally concluded, gazing expectancy into his eyes.
He gazed back into mine, taking a deep breath through his swollen lips. "Me too."
At this, I realized that all of my assumptions about him had been wrong. The times he got upset when I assumed he had been with other girls; it all made sense now. Something in my stomach unraveled, feeling relieved that we would both be inexperienced together. I wrapped an arm around his neck, pulling him into my chest, wrapping my arms around his soft back into a tight hug.
"Let's have our first experience together," I smiled against his frizzy, sweet scented hair.
"We'll take it slow," he added, his mouth tickling my skin. I kissed his lips deeply, both excited and anxious for what was to come. Although I haven't known him for long, I don't think time really matters, what matters to me is how comfortable this boy makes me feel. I felt I could trust him with my whole life; the warmth which cradles my heart at the sight of him says it all.
He pulled away, reaching his arm out of the bathtub to the floor where his pink coat and tank top lay in a heap, fumbling with the pocket of his coat for a moment before pulling out a small, pink bag with red hearts on it. To my guess, it looked like a party favor from tonight. He gave me a quick glance as I tilted my head in curiosity at what was in the bag. Once the strings were untied, he pulled out a small square package which shimmered gold in the candlelight. I quickly realized that it was a condom wrapper, making my cheeks flush at the thought of his dick which would shortly be buried deep inside of me. I was also happy to see that he was prepared and respected me enough to use protection. My heart fluttered for him.
I acknowledged his mindfulness with a smile, my curiosity still peaked at whatever else was in the bag.
"What else is in the bag, Gyu? I wasn't able to get my hands on a party favor," I inquired, eyeing the pink bag. He pursed his lips at my question, mouth curled as he was trying to contain a laugh. He rummaged through the bag, hesitant to pull out whatever else was in there. He handed me the bag, letting out a deep laugh in embarrassment as I pulled out several small bottles of flavored lube. I looked up at him with a laugh of my own.
"Its just funny that the party favors were my idea. Someone who's never had sex," he giggled into his the back of his hand. I couldn't help but chuckle at his cuteness. I examined the colorful arrangement of lube, about 6 different flavors ranging from cherry to apple, all intriguing me with their seemingly yummy mystery.
"We can try those if you want..." his voice emerged, trailing off as if he wasn't sure what to say. I liked the idea, nodding my head excitedly as I rubbed small circles on his thigh with my free hand. We both sat there in the water momentarily and I was sure that we both had the same burning question in mind.
"Will the condom work underwater?" I finally asked, doing the both of us a favor by relieving the silence. I had a feeling that he wanted to seem know what he was doing, but when it came to a condom in the water, he was just about as clueless as I was. We both shrugged, giggling as the question dawned over us.
"I'll just drain the water down a bit just in case," he reached behind him, pulling the plug out of the drain, causing the sudsy water to begin disappearing by the minute. Feeling the moment begin to heat up again as I caught him flick his eyes down to my tits, I stuffed the colorful bottles back into the pink bag, setting it on the ledge. As the water slowly drained, I inched closer to him, watching his plump lips glisten in the candlelight as I sweetly pressed mine to his. His tongue licked my bottom lip, asking for permission to enter my mouth. I gave him access, both our tongues now dancing in unison, tasting every bit of him.
His hands traveled all around my body, trailing down my sides and back up, he took one of my hands into his, tightly interlacing his fingers with mine, connecting us on a deeper level. I felt small chills form on my upper half as I noticed most of the warm water had drained, now barely filling the tub enough to cover our thighs. Noticing the water level, he put the plug back in the drain, a cloud of bubbles left in the tub along with the shallow pool of water. Our lips clashed back together like a magnet, feeling my stomach fill with nerves as I sensed what was coming. I pulled him closer, chests pressed together as the moment heated up all the more. Small moans filled the steamy air, both of us getting off just by kissing and slowly grinding against each other.
Lips connected, I sat up, guiding him so that he now sat upright against the tub wall; the opposite of how we had been before. Our noses brushed as I spread my legs over his, situating myself so that I now straddled him. He pulled away from my lips when my breasts hit his chin, drawing his attention to my chest. He buried his face in between my tits, using his hands to grope both of them lightly, fascinated by how they glistened in the candlelight. I watched him, getting more turned on my the second. He looked up at me innocently as he used the tip of his tongue to flick up and down on my nipple, coaxing an echoey moan from my lips at the sight, my mouth agape as I watched him in awe.
"Mhm, you like that?" his deep voice vibrated against my nipple as he spoke in the sexiest tone, my moans growing louder at the sheer sensuality of everything. Everything about him was perfect; his large, doe eyes filled with galaxies, gazing at me intensely, his full lips as he moved them across my chest, voice thick like honey, his blonde hair, now dark blonde as wet strands clung to his forehead. He was like- out of a dream. But this wasn't a dream; he was here with me right now, whispering dirty things across my skin as our hot breaths filled the musky air.
I cupped the side of his face, moving my lips to his neck as I kissed and sucked love bites on his soft, damp skin. His deep groan echoed in the bathroom as I slowly rocked over his rock hard dick, trying to get myself off by grinding my clit against his tip. I moaned against his neck as my throbbing clit found its way to where I wanted it; the sensation of the veins on his cock feeling fucking amazing against my desperate clit.
I pulled away from his neck, turning to face him only to find that he had placed the wrapped condom between his puffy lips, the sight seducing me even further. My heart raced profusely as he shut an eye in a sultry wink at me, the corner of his lips twitching upward. It reminded me of the time we danced at the party; the sexy expressions he made simply made me melt.
"You're so fucking hot," I admitted, pulling his chin closer to me as I bit the corner of the wrapper with my teeth, both of us turning our heads to rip the top off of the wrapper, being careful not to rip the condom. Once it was open, he pulled the condom out with two fingers, discarding the empty wrapper on the bathroom floor by his coat. He slid his hand down my back, bringing me closer to him as he sweetly kissed my lips one last time.
I sat up, a small string of my wetness stretching from his tip to my clit, connecting both of us. He hummed at the sight, a sexy grin on his lips as he used his finger to collect some of the wetness from my folds, sending a shiver up my spine at his touch. He brought his wet fingers to his lips, slowly licking them clean as his gaze boarded deeply into mine. My mouth fell agape at the sight, he really knew all the things to turn me the fuck on. I could hardly breath at the mere sight of him licking his fingers clean of my arousal.
"Fuck.." was what managed to fall past my lips as I watched him, drunk off of his aura. A deep giggle bubbled from his throat as he grinned, bringing me out of my daze as a small smile spread across my lips at the sound of his adorable laugh.
A sudden rush of serotonin coursed through my veins as I sat there on top of him, his face too perfect for this world. "Gyu!!" I jumped suddenly in his lap in excitement, using one of my fingers to pinch his cheeks. I was simply overwhelmed by his duality- how he can be so damn sexy one moment and the most adorable boy the next. His smile grew wider, pearly white teeth making an appearance through his lips.
"What!" his voice had shifted from a deep sexy one into a higher pitched one, my heart melting from his cuteness. I looked away for a second, searching my thoughts of what I wanted to say. There was something deep inside of me that I needed to get out so desperately; and now seemed like the perfect time.
"I.. really like you," my cheeks flushed crimson, surprised at the sound of my own words leave my mouth. When my eyes traveled hesitantly back up to his, they were bigger and even more sparkly than before, his cheeks burning brightly. He crashed his lips into mine, the kiss filled with pure love and emotion. He exhaled from his nose, using his other hand to sweetly cup the side of my face. When he slowly pulled away, his eyes centimeters away from mine, I could swear I was lost in outer space; thousands of stars and galaxies engulfing me with their mystery. My starry eyed boy. So perfect, I almost wanted to cry at how much joy poured into my heart in this very moment.
"And I really really like you," he replied, the tense nerves in my stomach releasing at the sound of his voice fill my ears. I wrapped my arms around his neck, pulling his forehead to mine. It was astonishing to me just how quickly we admitted our liking of one another, even after just being lab partners for one day and sharing some moments at his party. But I knew I was certain. It was something that goes beyond words, beyond what the eye can see. Its what I feel deep in my heart, and I'm sure his heart feels it too, as I felt it beating quickly through his chest against mine. I love this boy. So. Much.
I brought my lips to his again, both of our passion obvious as our tongues glided over each other's perfectly. His hand gingerly traveled over my collarbones, then over my chest again, the sensation of his long fingers over my nipples bringing a certain heat to my body, taking over my senses again. It didn't take long for the moment to catch fire again as I grasped a few locks of his hair between my fingers at the pleasure he was giving me just by slightly stroking my chest. He used his thumb to rub small circles on my clit, then slowly moved his thumb to my opening, pushing it deeply inside of me which made me moan loudly at the feeling. He pumped his thumb in and out at an excruciatingly slow pace, my jaw falling at the sight of his lip between his teeth as he watched me.
"How about I replace this with something else?" his darkened eyes focused on mine as he pulled his thumb out of me, licking it clean. All I could do was nod, my throat releasing small moans at the sight of his sultry expression.
Both of our attention focused down to his hand as he placed the condom on his tip, his painfully hard dick twitching as he slowly unraveled the condom down to the base of his shaft, the latex now wrapped snuggly on him. I grabbed his thumb, which he had sucked clean of my juices and put it in my own mouth, tasting a mixture of his saliva and my arousal swirl around in my mouth. He watched me through several strands of blonde hair which had fallen over his eyes, licking his lips at the sight of me sensually sucking his thumb.
His thumb still in my mouth, I lifted myself off of him slightly, using my other hand to position his tip on my clit, rubbing it in circular motions over my throbbing wetness. Nothing but the slick sounds of his tip on my clit and both of our soft moans filled the air. He slowly removed his thumb from my mouth and moved it to his own, licking the concoction of juices and our saliva off.
He sat up, pulling me closer to him as I moaned into his lips, it taking everything in me not to just completely sit down on his cock. I wanted to make sure he was ready, and I was sure it would probably hurt a bit since it was my first time, considering he was also pretty big. A part of me hoped it wouldn't hurt too bad but another part desperately needed to feel him stretch me out right here right now.
"Gyu I think I'm ready," I breathily moaned against his lips, my fingers crawling up his back. He hummed against my lips, kissing them once more before looking me in the eyes.
"Please take your time," he reassured me in a sweet voice, running his fingers through my hair as he sat back against the tub wall, keeping his eyes focused on my every move. He rubbed small circles on either side of my hips as I sat up on my knees, positioning his tip at my entrance. I sat down slowly, feeling as his warmth of his tip crept into my walls, slowly stretching me out as I sat all the way down on his cock. I gasped as I felt him twitch inside me, a deep moan escaping his lips and echoing through the bathroom. My mouth falling open as I slowly moved back up, both of us watching as his my labia stretched around his dick as I rocked up and down, increasing speed as I bounced on his thighs. He sat up, pressing his chest to mine, eyes rolling back in pleasure. The pleasure surely outweighed the pain as I could feel his length massaging my g-spot, causing a high-pitched moan to escape my throat.
"Beom- oh fuck you feel amazing," I managed to murmur into his plump lips as his mouth was also agape, sharing one breath as we moaned loudly, sure enough to be heard outside of the bathroom. He lowly hung his head in my chest as he shut his eyes closed at the immense pleasure of my tight warmth around his dick. I inhaled his hair, the scent of his shampoo and the lavender bubbles swirling perfectly in my nose.
The small slaps of skin from my ass on his thighs echoed throughout the bathroom as the sloshing from the water in the tub intensified as I increased my pace. I felt his teeth on my neck as he nipped at my skin, leaving red marks on my collarbones, intensifying the pleasure all the more. I spelled out his name by grinding against him, his tip hitting all the right spots as I circled my hips around, nearly wanting to scream at the immense pleasure. My tits bounced against his face as he hung his head low, taking one of my nipples into his mouth, the warm feeling of his tongue swirling on the sensitive bud sending shivers all around my body.
"You're fucking me so good," he moaned against my breasts, his dirty talk making me more fucked out than ever before. I threw my head back in pleasure, shutting my eyes, on cloud 9 at how he made me feel. His hands wrapped around my body, finding a comfortable home on my ass as he squeezed at the skin, using one of his hands to spank one of my cheeks causing a loud slap of skin to echo in the bathroom. I moaned louder than before, picking my pace up as fast as I had ever gone, feeling a knot begin to form in my stomach as his dick slammed perfectly into me every time.
"I wanna watch your pretty face as you ride me," he moaned, gently pulling my head down to his face as he was nearly out of breath. "You look so good," I returned his compliment as I breathily moaned into his lips, 100% honest as the sight of his beautifully fucked out expression was about to send me over the edge. With both hands, he gripped the sides my waist, helping me out by fucking into me. My thighs were burning with soreness, but I didn't give a shit, the pleasure outweighed the pain.
"Gyu I think i'm gonna cu-" was all I could say before he started pounding into me harder than ever before, his thighs meeting mine with the slap of skin as he fucked me at the fastest pace he could, the water from the tub raining on us as it sloshed around violently. It drove me crazy how vocal he was, his moans as loud as mine as they echoed beautifully throughout the large room. Our voices harmonized, strings of profanities leaving our lips as we both came simultaneously. Feeling his dick twitch inside of me, the knot in my stomach unravelling deliciously as a wave of ecstasy washed over my body, back arching as I rode out my high.
We both huffed into a sloppy, passion filled kiss as he wrapped his arms around me into a tight embrace. I giggled into his lips as his soft hair ticked the sensitive skin of my neck, feeling his lips form into a tiny smile. I ruffled his hair with a hand, pecking both of his cheeks excitedly. I felt the happiest with him, and now we felt so much closer than ever before.
"That was amazing.. you felt so good Gyu," I puffed my cheeks, raising my eyebrows at the memory of his dick inside me. The feeling was addicting, especially because it was him. He giggled, swiping his thumb over my lips, removing some of the saliva from the messy make out.
"You felt like heaven," he replied, softly biting my bottom lip as he sweetly kissed me. We sat there for a moment, coming down from our high as our breathing returned to normal, just examining each other, placing small, loving kisses everywhere imaginable on one another's faces. I noticed that his eyeliner was completely gone now, wiped away from the sweat and water from the tub. I gawked over his beautifully bare face. After a while, he broke the silence with a suggestion that caught my attention.
"Lets go to my room," he whispered against my lips, my head quickly nodding in excitement. We both climbed out of the tub, my legs instantly weak and trembling as I stood up, earning a laugh from him. He wrapped a fresh, linen scented towel around me from behind, helping me dry off. He ruffled the towel through his blonde locks, the sight so sexy that it didn't take long for wetness to return to my core. He draped the towel around his neck as he stood there naked, such a beautiful sight I couldn't help but stare. He slowly pranced over to me, my neck swiveling up to look at him the closer he got to me. He pressed his warm, naked body to mine, slowly inching his lips closer to my ear. My heart raced.
"You looked so gorgeous bouncing on my cock," his deep voice melted into my brain, sending so many shivers up my spine and pelting all over my body. He gave my neck an irresistible smooch before locking his dark eyes with mine. Before I could say anything, he hooked an arm under my leg, swiftly picking me up for the second time tonight, this time my legs wrapped around his waist as I straddled him, his hands on my ass to support me. I giggled at the sudden surprise. He walked, using one of his hands to open the bathroom door, kicking it open with his foot. He carried me through the cold air of his house, the white, marble walls and warm lighting providing a beautiful, spacious elegance to the place.
Soon, we arrived at the wooden door of his bedroom, soft light trickling out from the space under the door. He nudged the door open with his foot, revealing the warm glow of his room. As he walked over to set me on his bed, I looked around, taking in all of the pretty wooden accents, candles, and fairy lights that adorned his walls. The sweet pumpkin spice scent of his room engulfed my senses, bringing a nostalgic feeling as it went so well with the cozy ambiance. He set me down on the soft, plaid gray comforter of his medium-sized bed next to a few plushies which were excruciatingly adorable. An acoustic guitar hung on the wall straight ahead, as well as old records which decorated the cream-colored walls like black coffee with the perfect amount of sweet cream. It was all such an aesthetically beautiful sight, giving me a brand new aspect of the Beomgyu I know and love, my heart fluttering even more for him.
"Wow your room is so pretty, Gyu!" I exclaimed as I looked around, dazzled by the decor. I felt even more comfortable here than in my own home, the atmosphere was simply so inviting; I never wanted to leave. He plopped down on the bed next to me, our naked bodies pressing together as he smiled at me at my compliment.
"Not as pretty as you," he replied, caressing my cheek with his thumb. I pressed my lips to his at his darling compliment, filling my heart with joy and butterflies. Without pulling away from my lips, he climbed on top of me as I lay back on the pillowy comforter, his hand hooked around my thigh as his member hardened against my stomach. He hovered over me, hands creating an indent in the mattress by my sides where he held himself up. He placed his lips under my chin, kissing a long strand of kisses from my neck, in between my breasts, and down to my stomach. He nudged at the inside of my thigh, signaling me to spread my legs even wider than they already were. I spread them wide enough to fit his broad shoulders between them, shuddering as he began to kiss all the way down my thigh, arching my back as his warm breath grew closer to my wetness.
He placed the tip of his tongue at the base of my opening, licking a long stripe all the way up to my throbbing clit, hissing through my teeth at the amazing sensation his tongue had to offer. A moan escaped my lips as he flicked his tongue quickly against my clit, pulsating the tip of his tongue in tune with the pulsations of my heartbeat. What made it even hotter was that he looked up at me through the stray pieces on his forehead, his smoky eyes mixed with the sight of him completely devouring my pussy making me want to scream. Keeping his eyes on mine, he shook his head, burying his tongue deeper into me as his nose breathed in my scent.
I maneuvered myself up with my elbows to get a better view of him eating me out, not able to get enough of him. If it couldn't get any better, he stopped momentarily, pulling a pink bag out of his drawer; a party favor. He offered me the bag, and remembering what we had planned earlier, pulled out all of the bottles of flavored lube, arranging them in my palm for him to take his pick.
"Cherry please!" he chimed, happily taking the red bottle from my palm. I giggled as I put the bottles off to the side, focusing my attention back onto him. He unscrewed the lid of the small bottle, pouring a small amount on my clit, slightly flinching as the cold liquid dribbled down to my entrance. I sucked my bottom lip into my teeth at the arousing feeling. Using two fingers, he spread the liquid all over my clit and my entrance, moaning at the sensation of the cold liquid warming up by the second against my heat.
"Mmmh, you look so good," he hummed in a gentle voice, flicking his dazed eyes up to mine. I watched as he slowly slid his middle finger into my entrance, the extra lubrication making my jaw drop, soon becoming a moaning mess as he curled his finger up to my g-spot. "Oh yes" I moaned over and over again making high pitched sounds as he added his ring finger, making a deeper come here motion. His eyes never leaving mine, he began flicking his tongue on my clit, quickening his pace as his fingers maintained slow and steady pumps, fucking into me sweetly.
My mouth opened even wider at the heavenly sensation coming from his tongue and fingers, the low moans coming from his mouth vibrating against my clit, heightening my senses to the max. He removed his fingers and placed his open mouth over my entire pussy, sucking up all of my juices and licking long stripes from the base of my opening to my clit, swirling his tongue around deliciously.
"You taste amazing- with and without the lube," he breathed against my clit. "You feel fucking amazing Gyu," I quickly replied through my teeth, feeling out of breath at the sensation. He rubbed his index and middle fingers along my folds, sliding my clit in between them, applying slight pressure as he continued to rub up and down. The sensation of my clit sliding smoothly between his fingers made my eyes roll back, the familiar ball returning to my core as I felt my climax approaching. "Oh my god Gyu right there," I moaned loudly, notifying him of the immense pleasure his fingers were providing me.
At my request, he kept going, picking up the pace as my legs began to twitch at the sensation of the knot growing tighter in my stomach. I sensed the bed slightly shift when he climbed over me, his fingers still massaging clit perfectly. With his free hand, he poured a tiny bit of the cherry lube over my nipples and I gasped at the cool liquid drip down the most sensitive part of my chest. He then rubbed the slick liquid over both of my nipples simultaneously, stretching his thumb and ring finger to play with both of my nipples at the same time with his one free hand.
I buried the side of my head roughly into the mattress, inhaling the clean scent of his comforter as he simultaneously played with my pussy and nipples, intoxicating me with immense pleasure. I could've sworn I was floating on a cloud, feeling so overtaken with rupture that I couldn't even form a sentence. The walls of his house were quite used to my moans by now and anyone who might hear us from outside most definitely knew his name, due to the fact it left my lips every minute. His name quickly became my favorite name in the world, I felt I could never get tired of hearing or saying it.
"Beomgyu you're gonna make me cum I'm so close," I moaned, biting at the skin on my arm which surely would leave dark bite marks. He smiled at my words, striving to make me finish as he quickened the pace of his fingers and began licking the lube off of my tits, swirling his saliva around on each of my nipples which he knew would send me over the edge; and it did. As I released onto his fingers, he placed his lips on mine, devouring my loud moans as his tongue explored my mouth, the subtle taste of sweet cherries on his lips. My body became extremely relaxed under him as I came down from my high, a euphoric smile finding its way onto my face.
"You really know all the right places, you sure it's your first time?" I giggled jokingly, stroking his soft cheek as he licked his wet lips. A mischievous smile formed on his lips at my inquiry.
"Of course, silly!" he leaned down to peck my lips as an adorable laugh bubbled from his throat. I really couldn't get enough of his laugh, ever since the first time I saw him smile, I had fallen in love with it. In love with him.
"Your turn," I jumped up, wrapping him into my arms as I wrestled him so that he now laid on his back, me on top of him. He rose an eyebrow, a small grimace on his face as he saw me from a new view, my boobs more prominent from this angle. He bit his bottom lip at the sight of me, and I felt his dick twitch underneath my as it practically begged to be touched. I excitedly reached for the pink bag that lay on the edge of the bed. Weighing the 5 options, I ended up going for the strawberry flavor.
"Gyu, close your eyes!" I decided to play a little guessing game with him, refraining to show him the bottle until his eyes were shut. He smiled, curiosity on his face as he fluttered his eyes shut, pressing them tightly together in anticipation. Using this as my chance, I scooted off of him, making myself comfortable on the bed by his hips, gazing at his perfect naked body. I trailed my fingers along his thigh, inviting small goosebumps to form under my fingertips.
His dick was pressed flush against his stomach, a bead of pre cum glistening in the warm lighting of his room, waiting to be licked off. I used the tip of my tongue to gently lick the bead off, tasting every bit of him on my tastebuds. He bit down on his lip as he shifted around on the bed in anticipation for what was next. Unscrewing the lid of the tiny pink bottle, I drizzled a small amount onto his tip, watching as the thin liquid dripped down his entire length, the sight making my mouth water at how good his dick looked. I concluded that I was in love with every bit of him, from head to toe, even his dick was sexy. I am most definitely whipped for this boy.
He placed a hand under his head as his eyes were still sewn shut, the sight of his exposed armpit, his relaxed face, and his body right next to me turned me on so much, he was simply so beautiful. I capped the bottle, rolling it aside before propping myself up on my knees, holding my hair in my fist to prepare myself to go down on him. I started by kissing the warm skin of his thighs, inhaling his scent as I trailed up to his member, licking up his length before swirling my tongue over his sensitive tip.
I enjoyed the sour, yet sweet flavor of the strawberry lube, but either way I was addicted to the way every bit of him tasted, naturally. His deep moans filled the room, not echoing so much like in the bathroom, but still loud enough to make my clit throb at the very sound of his voice. I wrapped my lips around his length tightly, sucking my cheeks in to make him feel as much pleasure as possible. Then, before continuing, I removed my mouth from his dick with a pop, moving over to place my lips on his to continue our little guessing game. His tongue immediately entered my mouth, swirling around mine as he tried his best to pick up as much of the flavor as possible.
"Hmmmm... strawberry?" he questioned as he peeked at me through one eye. I clapped my hands together, nodding my head excitedly to signal his success. He smiled, fluttering both his eyes open.
"Now you get a very special prize for guessing it right," I chimed, giving his lips a peck and I winked at him, making my way back down to my spot in between his legs. He adjusted himself as he propped himself up on his elbows, gazing down at me.
"Now I get to watch your pretty face," he said in an endearing voice, giggling as he gave me an adorable smile, making my heart pound. I smiled as I positioned myself in between calves, now facing his hardened member as it glistened in the warm light, veins making their appearance as he grew harder by the second. I was destined to try something new, unsure of how to do it, but I felt comfortable and free of judgement with Beomgyu so I just tried my best. He watched me, fascinated as I squeezed my boobs together with both of my hands, positioning them over his dick. I slid his member in between my tits, forming a small pearl of spit on my lips, spitting on his tip to create more lubrication. He looked at me in awe, his mouth agape as a loud moan escaped his throat.
"Oh my fuck-" He threw his head back, his adam's apple bobbing up and down every time he released a moan. I quickened my pace, squeezing my tits together harder to form more pressure for him, causing his groans to grow even louder. He looked back down at me, totally infatuated as his eyes traveled from his cock stuffed in between my tits, to my eyes, gazing up at him innocently. He almost wanted to cum just at the sight.
I began licking his tip every time it peaked through the top of my breasts, swirling my tongue perfectly in unison with the thrusts. His eyebrows furrowed upward in pleasure as he made the most fucked out expression, clutching the comforter roughly in his fists. "Fuck fuck fuck!" was what he managed to groan out, along with other profanities mixed with the sweet sound of my name leave his lips. I had no idea how wet I was until I could practically hear the wet sound of my thighs sticking together. I squeezed my thighs together tightly in attempt to get myself off at the sight and sound of sexy moans combined with his absolutely fucked expression, his lip between his teeth biting at the skin roughly.
"I want you to come all over my face, Gyu," I breathily moaned as my clit began to throb between my thighs at the mere thought of him releasing all over my face. This provoked a loud grunt from his throat as he raked a hand through his hair, revealing his forehead. He looked so damn sexy, I just wanted to give him as much pleasure as I could, make him feel as good as he makes me feel. He lazily nodded his head as his eyes rolled back, shutting them tightly as he began thrusting his hips into my breasts. I reached out to grab his hand, feeling as he quickly grasped my fingers in a death grip, his other hand bunching the sheets so roughly I thought he was going to tear it apart.
He began fucking into my tits even harder as I messily licked his tip, enticing loud moans from the both of us. I figured that whenever I moaned against him, my voice vibrated against his tip, making his back arch in pleasure so I moaned louder, his thrusts becoming sloppier by the second as he was reaching his climax. He made the sexiest expression I had ever seen him make as soon as he reached his peak, we locked eyes and he opened his mouth as a loud, husky moan reverberated through the room. Soon, his cum began shooting out of his tip, messily drizzling all over my face, decorating me in its milky warmth. I opened my mouth, sticking my tongue out to receive every last drop that shot out of his twitching dick, some dripping onto my chest as I used my finger to scoop it up and lick it clean.
He simply stared at me in awe, huffing as he came down from his high, watching me through messy pieces of hair that covered his eyebrows. I licked my lips clean, feeling as his cum was now running down my face and getting onto his comforter. I tried to stop it from dripping, so I frantically cupped my hands to try and catch as much of it as I could, enticing a teasing laugh from him as he watched me panic.
"Here let me clean you up," he giggled, jumping off his bed to grab the towel we used earlier from the bath. He returned, wiping my face clean of his cum, and I licked my fingers clean, the sexual tension returning as I looked up at him innocently as I licked my fingers off one by one. My legs were incredibly weak, shaking as my swollen clit throbbed rapidly between my folds. I felt dizzily in need of his touch, grabbing his shoulder, I stood on my tip toes to press my lips desperately to his, puffy from biting down on them.
"Did you like fucking my tits?" I whispered against his throat, licking a stripe from the side of his neck up to his ear, nibbling lightly on the spot below his upper lobe piercing. I felt him shudder under my hot breath, his hand roughly groping my ass as the sexual tension reached its all time high. Now that we weren't virgins anymore, we had both gained more confidence with each other, willing to try anything and everything. Right now I wanted him to fuck me senseless.
"Your tits are so perfect. All of you is perfect," he muttered breathily into my lips, his eyes darkening like the deep ocean at night, a certain mystery washing over his aura as he gripped my ass tighter than before. I trailed my fingers across his back, pressing my chest tightly to his, watching his eyes travel down and back up, gazing at me sensually. Just the feeling of his eyes on my bare skin left me wanting more; wanting all of him. I kissed his cheek sweetly, blowing into his ear, "Only for you," which left his mouth slightly parted, tongue between his teeth. My clit was throbbing, swelling by the minute begging to be massaged by his perfect fingers. We both had an aura of mystery surrounding us, neither one of us able to tell what the other was thinking. Neither of us fought to be dominant; we both were.
"I want you to fuck me so deeply into the mattress that it leaves an imprint of my body. Can you fuck me that hard, Gyu?" My voice trailed deeply into his ear, making him hungrier for the taste of my skin by the second.
"I'll fuck you so hard you'll forget your own name," his deep voice husked against my skin, pressing messy kisses all over my neck as his hands grasped at my lower back, picking me up in one swift motion. I wrapped my legs around his bare hips, feeling his cock pressed against his stomach, already rock hard even though he came moments ago. To my surprise, he didn't carry me to the bed, but over to his dresser, where he set me down on the smooth wood, feeling its surface cool my ass.
"I'm gonna fuck you on every piece of furniture I own," his voice sounded deeper than before, eyes darkening as he looked at me with pure lust. He looked as sexy as always, but in this moment I felt I would simply pass away by how fucking hot he looked as his hair messily fell over the beads of sweat on his forehead, eyes fierce, lips plump, and his aura had me intoxicated. Noticing the condom in his hand, my eyes darkened at the idea of taking him raw, my mouth watering at the thought of being able to feel every little twitch, vein, and throb of his cock.
"Fuck me raw," was all I said, a sliver of concern washing over his features.
"Are you sure?" he asked in a serious tone as eyes widened at my request. I nodded, not an ounce of concern since I had been on the pill for over a year to help regulate my period. There was nothing to worry about, plus I trusted him to pull out anyway.
"I trust you, Choi Beomgyu," the sound of his full name made his face soften, a small smile on his lips as discarded the condom. His fingers trailed up the sensitive skin of my inner thighs, his sweet smile turning into a smirk as the familiar darkening of his eyes resurfaced. With both of his thumbs, he spread out my folds, getting a good look at my soaking wet pussy, licking his lips at the sight. I crashed my lips into his, having been deprived of his touch for the short amount of time his hands weren't on my body. I was addicted to him, feeling euphoric as his hands roughly grasped at the pillowy skin of my thighs.
I left a wet spot on his dresser, becoming unbelievably drenched by the second. I wrapped my legs around his lower back, pressing him closer to me, desperately trying to rub my clit against his dick. When he noticed how desperate I was, a glint of mischief became visible on his face as he held my hips in place to stop me from going any further. He grabbed his cock in his other hand, slowly rubbing his tip in circles over my swollen clit, not applying any pressure which made me whine out. He watched me squirm as he slowed his pace even more, teasing me as he tapped his tip lightly on my entrance.
"Fuck Beomgyu, please- I need you to stuff me full," I whined with begging eyes as he grinned mischievously at me, lifting one eyebrow as listened to my pleads. My heart raced as I anticipated the moment.
"Like this?" he gave in to my request, suddenly thrusting his bare cock into me, watching as his length disappeared all the way into my soaking wet pussy. I tightened around him, the feeling of him stretching me out causing my high pitched moans to fill his room. He began thrusting into me hard and deep, just the way I needed it. I rested my head back against the wall, gripping at the wood of his dresser, the perfect height for him to fuck into me, considering how tall he is.
He placed his palm next to my hip, leaning into the dresser as he towered over me, hungry eyes gazing deeply into mine as he thrusted into me deeply. Our breaths intermingled as both of our moans filled the warm air, grabbing onto his muscular arm as I dug my finger nails into his skin, leaving behind little crescent shapes. He licked a stripe up my neck, then kissed over it, sucking bruising hickeys all over my neck. A string of profanities left my lips as he thrusted so hard into me, my legs wrapped tightly around his waist as the sound of skin slapping echoed throughout his room. He thumbed at my clit, the sensation sending a chill up my spine at how good it felt.
Just as I felt myself climbing towards my climax, his hands reached around my back, hooking an arm under my thigh as he picked me up off the dresser, still fucking into me as he carried me across his room. He slammed my back against the wall with a thud, pressing my bare skin against the cold cream-colored paint. Hooking both arms under my thighs, he held me snuggly against the wall as he continued fucking into me, chest pressed to mine. This position felt so hot, making me ten times more turned on.
"Holy shit you feel so good," he moaned against my neck, his warm breath huffing against my chest. I felt droplets of his sweat drop onto my skin, mixing with my own sweat as evidence of just how hot the moment was. I was a moaning mess, tits bouncing as he held me firmly against the wall, fucking me hard and fast. For this being our first night losing our virginity, I was shocked at the fact this boy was fucking me against the wall, but I had no complaints at all- it felt perfect. I inhaled his damp hair, matted down with sweat as his room grew hotter by the second.
"Where do you want me to fuck you next?" he huffed against my ear, husky voice spilling into my brain, back arching as I felt his dick twitch against my walls as he moaned out in pleasure. I looked over his broad shoulder, searching around his room for our next destination. I spotted a medium sized coffee table next to a velvet chair, which could potentially serve as two places in one. Bingo.
"On the coffee table," I moaned against his shoulder as he gave me a few last thrusts before securing an arm tightly around my back as he pulled away from the wall. My stretched out pussy felt empty when he suddenly pulled out of me, setting me down on the floor in front of the brown coffee table.
"Turn around for me," he whispered into my lips as he kissed them deliciously. I did as he said and pressed my back to his chest as I turned around, facing the coffee table, which came up to about my hips. I felt his palm gently push my back down towards the table, bending me over. I understood where this was going as I pressed my chest to the cool wooden surface, arching my back and giving my ass a small shake as I felt a hand come down across my ass cheek, the spanking sound filling his room. I looked back over my shoulder as he reached a hand around to my throat gently squeezing, not too hard, but enough for me to moan out in pleasure at the feeling.
Suddenly, I felt his tip rub up and down between my folds before he pushed his entire length into me, the sound of my ass slapping against his thighs noticeable amongst both of our moans. Both of his hands fell to my hips as he tightly gripped them in place, fucking into me at the fastest pace he had ever gone. The way he stretched me out, thrusting into me so hard and deep had my eyes watering in pleasure, my moans echoing against the hollow wood of the coffee table.
I looked over my shoulder at him, witnessing as his head was thrown back in pleasure, his sharp jawline visible from this angle, causing me to bite down on my lip. His mouth fell agape when I began fucking myself against his cock, increasing our speed by a lot. His eyes fluttered opened as they met mine, locking as we both wore the most fucked out expressions. I moved one of his hands over to my face, stuffing a few of his fingers into my mouth as I sucked on them. The sight had him biting down on his entire bottom lip, now red and bruised from how much he had been biting it. I grabbed both of his hands, placing them on my breasts and he held onto them, using them as leverage as he fucked me hard against the table. He leaned over me, meeting my lips as I looked at him over my shoulder, placing his wet lips against mine in a sloppy kiss. An idea occurred to me as I spotted the velvet chair next to us.
"How about I ride you on that velvet chair?" I asked against his lips, the idea appealing to him as he immediately pulled out, doing his best to last as long as possible. I pushed him down onto the chair, the soft purple velvet soothing my skin as I climbed over him, crashing my lips onto him as I sat down completely down on his cock. I bounced on him with a steady pace, moaning into his lips as we desperately kissed, a strings of saliva connecting both of us as we came up for a breath. He threw his head back as I quickened my pace, bouncing mercilessly on his rock hard cock, intoxicated with the way he stretched me out, hitting my g-spot every time. His dick was too good.
"Y/n I'm really sorry but I'm so close-" he moaned, eyes shut tightly as his mouth fell open at the sheer pleasure my pussy was providing him.
"No, don't apologize Beomie, lets finish on the bed," I cooed, rubbing the side of his face as I felt my climax approaching as well. He opened his eyes, looking at me in utter desire to unleash at any second.
He stood up from the chair, picking me up with him and carried me over to the bed before setting me on the edge. I laid back as he placed my legs on either side of his shoulders, his dick plowing as deeply into me as he had been. His chest met mine as he moaned into my lips, his pace quickening as I felt his dick begin to violently twitch inside of me, perfectly hitting my g-spot, sending my body over the edge. He pulled out as warm cum drizzled all over my stomach, using his hand to aim into my mouth as I opened wide, waiting for his warm release to drip onto my tongue. I licked every last drop from his tip, placing soft kisses on his cock as he huffed, both of our chests heaving up and down at how tired we were from fucking all night.
I was a sweaty mess, covered in every last drop of Beomgyu's cum. And he was.. well.. just a sweaty mess. A hot, sweaty mess.
As our breathing regulated, we both let out a breathy laugh at what we had just done. "You did indeed fuck me against every piece of furniture you own," I raised my eyebrows, admitting to what had just happened, hearing his deep laugh as he cleaned my chest up with the same towel from earlier.
"I always keep my word," he smiled, shrugging his shoulders as he rubbed small circles on my cheek. As he finished cleaning me up, he bunched the towel, discarding it in the corner by a small pile of his dirty clothes, plopping down next to me with a thud on the bed. I rolled over to face him, and he did the same, an arm holding our heads up as we gazed at each other. He traced his fingertips down my side affectionately as we talked about the events of the night, including the party and how we were excited to go back to school and continue working on the lab project together, laughing at the thought of Mr. Kang catching us. His eyes lit up as he talked to me, gazing deeply into mine as he paid attention to every little thing I said, making my heart nearly beat out of my chest.
Not able to contain my love, I jumped on him, wrapping my arms around his neck into a tight hug as I straddled him, getting an even better grip on him. He giggled at my sudden gesture, wrapping his arms around my upper back, smiling against my skin.
"Thank you for today, Gyu," I mumbled into his shoulder, pulling away to face him. He looked at me with his large, dark brown eyes, deeply searching mine as I searched his. "No. Thank you for coming into my life," he remarked in almost a whisper, slowly pressing his lips onto mine, kissing me so deeply.
He leaned over to flick the light of his lamp off, only leaving the subtle glow of the fairy lights to illuminate his pretty room. We snuggled under the covers like two excited kids on Christmas Eve, feeling euphoric as we cuddled and talked about everything imaginable. We played a little game of nudging each other's feet under the covers, trying to wrestle and see who's feet were stronger. We held hands under the covers as our naked bodies provided warmth to one another, his soft skin lulling me nearly to sleep as I inhaled his scent. Feeling my eyes get extremely heavy, I looked up at him one last time before I could fall asleep, his starry eyes meeting mine. Before I could say what I wanted to, he cut me off.
"I fell in love with you," he whispered, inching his face closer to mine. My lips curled up into the biggest smile, heart fluttering intensely as warm tears stung my eyes amidst the beautiful moment.
"I fell in love with you too, Gyu," I responded, blinking the tears away from my vision. He reached a finger down to my chin, pulling my lips up to meet his, our mouths dancing slowly in unison as we sweetly kissed. A moment later, he snuggled his face into my neck and I found a comfortable place on the crown of his head, breathing in the sweet scent of his hair as I slowly drifted off into a deep, peaceful slumber next to the boy who completed me.
hi can u do a filipino version of like beomgyu fingering u while in class or something
warnings: exhibitionism
summary: dapat tapos na ang class mo 30 minutes ago. dumating si beomgyu 10 minutes before expecting na matatapos ka agad.
"nakita niyo ba kung gaano kabilis ang appeal to pity na stance sa clip na yun?" tanong nang professor mo. kanina pa tila lumulutang ang isip mo dahil sa haba nang session. wala daw siya next week kaya kinareer naman niya nang bongga ang discussion.
"gyu!" sabi mo sabay pagalit na hampas mo sa boyfriend mo noong bigla siyang umupo sa ilalim nang lames mo. inangay mo naman ang camera mo para mata at noo mo lang ang kita nito. "i'm in class pa!"
"overtime na," bulong nito. ginagawang unan ang mga hita mo. hinihimas niya ito nang dahan-dahan. inangat nito ang tingin sayo na para bang naka-puppy eyes pa. inirapan ko lang ito at pinitik sa noo. "aray!"
"later na lang gyu," sabi mo dito. kahit anong pilit mong makinig sa prof mo ay parang lumulutang ka na papunta sa kabilang dimensyon. pinapaikot mo ang ballpen mo sa kamay mo habang nakikinig.
binuksan nang konti ni beomgyu ang binti mo. sanay ka namang ginagawa niyang earmuffs ito. kaya naman inisinawalang bahala mo na lang yun. hinalikan nito ang tuhod mo at nilabas ang phone niya.
ilang minuto pa ay nararamdaman mo na ang mga halik nito sa inner thighs mo. mabilis mong hinawakan ang kamay nito. signaling him to stop. tinignan ka lang ni beomgyu habang inuusad ang crotch area nang shorts na suot mo.
"ayaw mo?" malambing na tanong nito sayo. tinignan mo si beomgyu at hinalikan niya ang clit mo sa ilalim nang panty mo. napatingin ka naman sa laptop mo at nag-off cam. "do you want me to stop?"
"no, no no, just," sabi mo dito. hindi mo alam kung anong tamang tugma nang salita ang pwede mong sabihin kay beomgyu. dahan-dahan mong binuksan ang binti mo habang naka-kagat labi. "okay."
inusog ni beomgyu ang panty mo sa isang tabi. gamit ang dalawang daliri niya ay pinaghiwalay niya ang mga labi nang puke mo bago hipan ang clit mo. sa gulat ay napaungol na nang mahina. ang isang kamay mo ay nasa buhok ni beomgyu.
"mag-notes ka dyan," sabi nito sayo. hinapyawan mo siya nang tingin at nakita mo sinubo niya ang dalawang daliri niya. ang isang kamay niya ay pinapasusog ang bewamg mo papalapit sa kanya. "be a good student, y/n."
"iniistorbo mo ko," sabi mo dito. nanginginig ang boses mo habang sinusubukan mong sundan ang lecture nang prof mo. "fuck."
nilapat ni beomgyu ang dila niya sa puke mo at dinilaan iyon. napakagat ka naman nang labi dahil dito. gamit ang dalawang thumb niya ay pinaghiwalay niya ang labia mo.
noong una ay mabagal niya lang dinidilaan ang clit mo. kung kailan sa tingin mo ay nasasanay ka na sa galaw niya binibilisan o binabagalan niya ito. keeping you on edge. pinulupot niya ang labi niya sa clit mo at sinipsip ito.
"babe," mahinang ungol mo dito. tinignan ka ni beomgyu habang sinisipsip iyon. ang dalawang daliri niya ay nasa entrance mo. dahan-dahan niyang pinasok ito. nakabukas ang bibig ko na tila ba kinokontrol mo ang ingay mo.
"be a good girl, y/n," paalala ni beomgyu sayo. inunbutton niya ang suot mong uniform top. nagiwan ito nang ilang butones para kung mago-on cam ka man ay hindi kita ang ginagawa niya. marahan niyang pinisil ang suso mo. dahilan kung bakit niyuko mo ang torso mo papunta sa kanya. "babasahin ko yang notes mo mamaya."
"mahal naman," pagangal mo dito. nagpasok pa ito nang isa pang daliri sa loob mo. inikot miya ang daliri niya para ang palad niya ay nasa direksyon nang sahig. mas mabilis niyang nagagalaw ang daliri niya habang dinidilaan ang clit mo.
kinagat mo ulit ang labi mo habang ginagalaw ang bewang mo. sinusubukan mong sundan ang galaw ang kamay ni beomgyu sa loob mo. tinug ni beomgyu ang utong mo para patigilin ka. kasabay nang marahang kagat sa isang labia mo.
"sorry! sorry!" bulong mo dito. napatingin ka sa screen mo. ang prof mo ay nagfaflash nang kung ano. kung kanina ay hindi mo lang masundan. ngayon ay hindi mo na alam kung salita pa ba ang sinasabi nito. "mahal, please."
tinanggal ni beomgyu ang isang daliri niya sa loob mo. gamit ang dalawang natitirang daliri ay binuka niya ang butas nang puke mo. pinasok niya ang dila niya sa pagitan nito.
dinala mo ang isang kamay mo sa clit mo para galawin ito. ang kamay mo ay nirurub ito sa up and down motions. ang isang kamay mo naman ay nilalaro ang kabilang suso mo sa taas nang damit mo.
"don't touch," sabi ni beomgyu. mabilis ko namang tinanggal ang kamay mo sa sarili mo at nilagay iyon sa lamesa. nilagay ni beomgyu ang parehong kamay niya sa magkabilang binti mo at hinigit ka papalapit sa kanya. "tell me if lalabasan ka na."
"okay," mahinang tugon mo dito. dinuraan ni beomgyu ang puke mo bago ka nito kainin ulit. ang galaw nang dila niya ay mas matigas sa clit mo.
pinasok ulit ni beomgyu ang daliri niya at nakasagad ito sa loob mo. ang daliri niya ay mabilis na pinapaalon niya sa loob mo. napasandal ka sa upuan mo. ang dalawang kamay mo ay nasa bibig mo habang sinusubukan mong hindi mag-ingay.
"gyu, lalabasan na ko," bulong mo dito sabay piga nang isang kamay mo. naghum lang ito sa clit mo. noong labasan ka ay napahawak ka sa magkabilang hawakan nang upuan mo.
ang bibig mo ay nakabukas habang sinusubukan mong kalmahin ang sarili mo. si beomgyu naman ay dahan-dahang tinggal ang daliri niya sayo. ang bibig niya ay dahan-dahang sinisipsip ang clit mo.
"open cam na lahat for the attendance," sabi nang prof mo. mabilis mong sinuklay ang buhok mo bago mo binuksan ang camera. nilapit mo ang mukha mo dito dahil ang isang kamay ni beomgyu ay pinasok niya sa loob nang uniform mo. "pawis na pawis ka ms. l/n!"
"init po eh!" pabiro mo dito bago mo minute ang mic mo. nahpicture lang kayo saglit at inend na din nito ang zoom. mabilis mong pinatay ang laptop mo bago inusog ang upuan mo para iunbutton ang uniform mo.
"suck," sabi ni beomgyu. dinala nito ang mga daliri niya sa bibig mo. hinawakan mo ang wrist nito bago mo sinubo ang mga daliri niya. tinaas mo ang tingin mo kay beomgyu at nakita mong nakangisi lang ito sayo. "sarap mo ba? ako naman sir. mo," bulong nito sa tenga mo.
it’s been almost 2 hours since you’ve been there, you were done with JYPnation collab practise and had just finished all PLUME practises about 30 minutes ago.
Waiting for Chaewon and Hanni to arrive you were at...
The cafe?
Waiting area?
Random hall?
You had no idea what it was. Most of the idols performing were there so you and the girls thought joining would be good to socialise, turns out it was! You got to talk with lots of idols you never had the chance to before.
But you were getting more and more nervous as time passed.
For the performances?
No, not really.
Because he wasn’t here yet?
Probably.
After following around your members and chatting with a few unfamiliar faces for a while you decided to go sit down and scroll through your phone.
NOTE tbh i dont have any note to leave this time but this rlly isnt one of my best wroks. its a bad cahpter ew but anyway everyone hs those days🥰 i swear next part will be so much better, love u pookies🙏also new smau maybe......🤔🤔🤔
warnings: NOT PROOFREAD ‼️, bad writing, hana being a bitch pt1000??? IGNORE TIMESTAMPS
there wasn't a good explanation as to why you were acting so recklessly, nobody understood why you were so defensive of hana, the girl who claims to be your friend but she's just a mean girl towards you.
you didn't have a good reason either, maybe it was because of your abandonment issues or your hard time cutting ties with someone who has been in your life since forever, either way, you did agree with soyeon but you needed time to think and maybe get a psych consult but right now you were just letting it go in its own way.
as you were so clouded in your thoughts, you didn't realize kai approaching you to go to the library, you had promised to help him study since he was failing some of the classes you were good at.
what you didn't know was that at the library were the two people you didn't wanna see today.
choi beomgyu and kim hana, together at a table.
you were a bit shocked to see them, and a bit hurt too but you thought that you didn't have the right to be upset since you were the one to let this happen, plus, it was obvious that hana would make a move on him as soon as she could.
the minor noticed you staring at something or someone, and that's when he remembered that today beomgyu was gonna be at the library to make the geography project that he was assigned to do with hana.
suddenly the blonde was trying everything to move you outside and get out of there but it was too late because one of them had already noticed you and unfortunately it wasn't the one who should've noticed.
hana saw you watching them with a frigid expression, she smiled a bit and suddenly brought beomgyu closer and kissed him.
you widened your eyes at the horrible sight, kai by your side didn't know what to do when he saw tears in your eyes so he just stood there frozen in time while you were already turning your back out to leave the place as fast as you could.
“hey idiot! she just saw you!” huening yelled, not caring if the librarian kicked him out, he was pissed at beomgyu since his point of view was just them kissing and not kim hana forcing his friend to kiss her.
beomgyu moved in shock when he heard his friend's words, he looked at hana with eyes of full anger and picked up his things to go and find you.
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PROMT ! you've been in love with choi beomgyu since 8th grade but you never said anything to him, fearing it'll ruin your friendship with one of your friends, who mysteriously likes him too, but what if one day at a party he kisses you and now you can't stop thinking about him and act as if nothing happened?
A/N ! I'M BACK!!! i hope you guys missed me because i did :c hana stop being a bitch go! i hate her sm and yn is just plain stupid like me lmao OH AND THE TAGLIST WILL GET CLOSED IN THREE DAYS!!!!
pixelskylines
vaporwave
gummygunk
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