So, I downloaded Tinder back onto my phone last night. It’s been a year and a half since I used it. Last time I used it, I started dating someone (for 7 months) that turned out to be a complete douche. But, I try not to hold things an ex did against new prospects…
That being said, I’ve obviously had some sort of ‘success’ with Tinder, so I decided to give it another go. Within the first 12 hours, I had already received messages from about 5 guys. I know ahead of time that I will have to weed through the crappy guys out there. I have no preference on race or size, although I do favor the beefy men. Hey, I’m a big girl and I need a man that can handle all of me. I swipe right for all kinds of builds and types. Knowing that my brother uses the same app and has told me that he swipes right for every person on there and weeds them out later, has given me some skepticism in the reality of the matches I get on here. My bro is all about the hook up and I can’t even think about doing one night stands. It’s just not me. I don’t have it in me to just hit it and quit it. I’m a relationship girl. I need there to be more of a connection there. I take my matches with a grain of salt, and if they take the time to actually message me, then I will respond and see what’s up.
I’ve been a member of many a variety of dating websites and apps throughout the years. I have had my ups and downs and can tell you which are my favorite and which ones really annoy me. There are assholes everywhere, but one thing that annoys me more than anything are men that go straight to sex talk. My most recent experience with this was today. One of the guys that was messaging me was no more than 5 responses back and forth of super small talk (mind you he never actually asks me anything personal or tries to get to know anything about me at all) before he says to me, “Are you a sexual person? If so what do you enjoy sexually?” What? I’m sorry… Call me crazy, but maybe you should find out my name before you inquire as to my favorite sexual position… Seriously? I can’t even with men like this. Needless to say, I stopped responding to him. Inquiries like that don’t even deserve a response. If I was to write back it would be rude and mean and I just don’t even want to get into that. Another thing that really pisses me off… dick pics. If any woman tells you they think a picture of a penis is hot or attractive in any way, they are lying. Penises are ugly. As are vaginas. I’m not sending you pics of my vagina, and you can keep pics of your member to yourself as well. Especially if you send a pic completely unsolicited. I didn’t ask you for it. We weren’t even on the conversation of it. And, WHAM, there’s his dick. No thank you. I’m far from a prude, and I am a sexual person, but that is left for the right time and place. If we get to know each other and our conversations eventually lead to a sexual topic, I will answer them openly and 110% honestly. I have no problem talking about sex and I am completely confident in my sexuality and my likes and dislikes. That’s not the issue. The issue is men who jump from “Hey” to “what color panties are you wearing?” Ugh!!!
On the flip side, I’m already talking to some guys that are really taking the time to get to know me as a person. That’s important to me. I want to know that we have things in common and that we will be able to carry on an actual conversation. It also shows me early on if we are polar opposite and won’t have anything in common. I’m completely honest in my responses. I typically don’t even swipe right unless I have read through their profiles first. Catch my eye first and then catch my interest. I have noticed there are more men out there looking for something long term than I thought there would be. Or are they just writing that in their profiles to lure me in?? Who knows. Apparently I’m willing to take the risk.
I really like that Tinder is free and that they allow you to message your matches at any time. Yes, you have to actually match with someone before you can contact them, but doesn’t that make sense? You don’t want to bother someone with your messages if they don’t even find you attractive, right? I like the idea, I just wish there weren’t so many sleezy men out there trying to get their rocks off or looking for a quick score. There are adult websites for that sort of inquiry. Yes, I’ve been a member of a couple of those as well. I know the difference. I understand that Tinder was originally built for hookups, but I am very up front about how I am not looking for a hook up. It’s brought me luck before, so I’m crossing my fingers for better luck this time. I will keep you updated.
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