i'm a bad bitch you can't kill me

hahahahaha what

[karmacchameleon]

purrrrrrrfect:

“Wikihow made it seem so easy! It tricked me. It always tricks me. We still have the bathroom sink, though!”

“You’re lucky you’re so goddarn adorable, or I’d actually be mad.” Kenna linked her arms around Heather’s waist. “Did you at least call a plummer?”

[karmacchameleon]

purrrrrrrfect:

“No, yeah, of course, but it’s, um - it’s - it… comes with the meal, actually. So. You don’t have to drink it, obviously, but it’s included, so it will be… there, if you happen to need it, which I’m sure you will not. Um. I’ll be right back with your order!”

“Milk comes with the meal? Isn’t that a bit presumptuous? What if I was vegan or lactose intolerant.” Barry stifled a laugh. “Joking, I’m joking. I guess I’ll take it. Not that I need it or anything.”

[karmacchameleon]

purrrrrrrfect:

“Did you, um… did you want anything else? Like maybe some milk?”

“Nah, it’s not that spicy...I can, uh, totally handle it.”

[karmacchameleon]

purrrrrrrfect:

“So, you know how the sink was leaking earlier? Yeah? Well, so. The thing is. What happened was… The thing is - so, I tried to fix it. And. Um. I… should not have. I may have broken our sink.”

“Ah, my hero. I thought you quit it with the tinkering after blowing the bulb in that lamp. I can’t leave you alone for a minute.”