[ Warnings/Tags: no quirk au, angst, death, gore, blood, spice (characters are 18+), so many clichés omg… I think that’s it pls yell at me if I forgot something ]
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You were never one for spooky things but foolishly decided to join your friends on their trip to a supposedly haunted cabin in the woods. You had watched one too many horror films to think that this was a good idea, but you also didn’t want to be the only one to chicken out. You’d soon realise, however, that staying at home would have been the better decision. Because you weren’t sure whether you would ever make it back alive…
In this story, the choices you make will decide the fate of you and your friends. So choose wisely - everything has consequences, and sometimes the right choice isn’t as obvious as it may seem.
There is a way to save everyone, but will you find it?
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[Story length depends on whether you manage to keep everyone alive long enough. But there is a maximum of 8 chapters if you do]
Chapter 1
🔒 Chapter 2
🔒 Chapter 3
🔒 Chapter 4
🔒 Chapter 5
🔒 Chapter 6
🔒 Chapter 7
🔒 Epilogue
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[Updates Sundays, aiming for 6 pm GMT | Voting times Sun - Thurs]
Just started posting a new story! It's a choose your own adventure kinda story and you can vote on what happens next! If you'd like to read it, go follow my new blog @katsubuns 🥺💖
[ Warnings/Tags: angst, major character death, cursing, grief, thoughts of self-harm, depression, thoughts of suicide, plot relevant nsfw scenes (characters are 18+), hurt/comfort, fluffy as the story progresses - I think that’s it pls yell at me if I forgot something ]
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On the day Red Riot fell in battle, the nation lost a hero, and you lost your beloved husband.
With your once perfect life, now crumbling to pieces, you need to learn how to cope with your loss and find a way to pick yourself back up again.
While at first you believe yourself to be alone with your grief, you soon find solace in the arms of your late husband‘s best friend, Bakugou Katsuki.
Will you be able to help each other through this difficult time? Or will your newfound companionship spark emotions that will make things even more complicated than they already are?
[ Warnings/Tags: angst, hospital stay, memory loss, manipulation, emotional abuse, torture (oof), mild plot relevant sexc time mentions (characters are 18+), hurt/comfort, fluff, slowburn, sad Katsuki 🥺 ]
Your last year at UA was supposed to be the best one yet, you were close to graduation, and Class 3-A was certain that it would be a year none of you would ever forget.
But the accident changed everything.
When you woke up, almost all your memories of your time at UA had gone missing, leaving you confused and isolated.
You were lucky to meet the mysterious Yami during your stay at the hospital, he was like a saving grace to you.
Little did you know that nothing was as it seemed and that letting him into your life would cause a series of events that would quickly spiral out of control.
While everyone was trying to save you from the person you were becoming, nobody realised that there was another person that needed saving:
Bakugou Katsuki, your boyfriend.
Because even though you had kept your relationship a secret, your feelings for each other had been real. Unfortunately, while his love for you was as strong as ever, you had forgotten everything, and it was slowly tearing him apart.
Hanahaki AU in which y/n loves Bakugou but he seems to despise her in return. After y/n decides to undergo treatment, feelings change and suddenly everything is flipped upside down. Love triangles, messed up friendships and lots of heartbreak follow - will happiness prevail or was it never even an option?
Lead Me Out Of The Dark 🖋 || 📚 || ☁️ || ⚡
After waking up in the hospital, unable to recollect the past couple years of her life, y/n is faced with a scary new reality. Fortunately she finds support in a charming boy she meets at the hospital. While she tries to move forward, Bakugou Katsuki can do everything but. How was he supposed to win back his girlfriend who doesn’t even remember dating him?
Euphoria ✔ || 🌸 || ⚡
When The Lights Go Dark ✔ || 🌸 || ⚡
Night Stalker ✔ || 🌸 || ⚡
(Don’t) Need You ✔ || 🌸 || ⚡
Two Words - Part 1 | Part 2 ✔ || 🌸 || ⚡ || 💥
Cozy Comfort ✔ || 🌸 || ☁️
Chilly Confessions ✔ || 🌸 || ☁️
Halloween Special ✔ || 🌸 || ☁️
Possessed ✔ || 🌸 || 💥
Make A Move ✔ || 🌸 || 💥
Big Bad Wolf ✔ || 🌸 || 💥 || ⚡
Embers and Ashes pt.1 ✔ || 🌸 || 💥 || ⚡
Embers and Ashes pt.2 ✔ || 🌸 || ⚡
Scared Gremlin ✔ || 🌸 || ☁️
Costumes & Confessions ✔ || 🌸 || ☁️
Lost ✔ || 🌸 || ⚡ || ☁️
Ghosts Aren’t Real ✔ || 🌸 || ☁️
Let it Snow ✔ || 🌸 || ☁️
The Perfect Pumpkin ✔ || 🌸 || ☁️
The Perfect Boyfriend ✔ || 🌸 || ☁️
The True Meaning of Halloween ✔ || 🌸 || ☁️
Protect You ✔ || 🌸 || ⚡ || ☁️
Moving On (Bakugou x Reader / Midoriya x Reader) ✔ || 🌸 || ⚡ || ☁️
Your Halo ✔ || 🌸 || ⚡ || ☁️
Homesick ✔ || 🌸 || ⚡ || ☁️
The Beauty and the Baby ✔ || 🌸 || ⚡ || ☁️
The Light Behind Your Eyes Part 1 ✔ || 🌸 || ⚡
Moving On (Bakugou x Reader / Midoriya x Reader) ✔ || 🌸 || ⚡ || ☁️
Masterlist in bio; warnings in Masterlist; chapter specific warnings - none
//
The moment you had walked away from All Might, you already regretted the way you had talked to him. You knew that he didn’t deserve it, but you couldn’t help yourself. You were aware of the fact that you had fucked up, and you didn’t need anyone telling you. Especially not him.
You sighed deeply. That had been two days ago, and you had spent the rest of the weekend curled up in your room. Not wanting to talk to anyone. Quite frankly, you didn’t know what to do. You felt helpless.
You knew that you had mistreated your friends because of your insecurities and the fact that you felt misunderstood. You knew that they were just looking out for you, you just didn’t want to be treated like a baby. Then there was Yami… You felt horrible because you had messed up his life. You knew that he didn’t feel that way and that he would never blame you for anything. His grades were suffering since he was trying to find a cure for your amnesia, though, and his parents had kicked him out because he was dating you. No matter how you put it, it was your fault.
And to top it all off, you had been rude towards the most famous hero on the planet, and he didn’t even deserve it.
Let me start by saying a big thank you to everyone who sent me asks and DMs while I was gone. I appreciate them SO much and I promise I will get back to every single one of you as soon as I can 🥺💖 And thank you to all you little beans that patiently waited for me to get my shit together 🥺💖 Also a big thanks to all my new followers who joined the fam and never got any new content - I'm sorry 😭
It's been a terribly rough year for all of us and I honestly reached a little breaking point when I received those hurtful messages. I worked through it a while ago but then Covid and so much other crap happened that I just couldn't get back into the spirit of writing.
I wanted to post here so many times but whenever I thought of logging back into my account I started to panic. I don't know why, but this blog just doesn't feel like it used to. So I decided to move on to bigger and (hopefully) better things.
I made a new blog called @katsubuns and will pick up where I left off. katsuizukiri will not be deleted but it will be an archive. So if you want to read my new BNHA works then please follow my new blog!
I also started working on some kpop fics (BTS, TXT and SKZ). None of this is ready to be posted yet but I will share the name of that blog once I'm ready.
Regarding what content you can expect in the coming months:
- I just finished writing Lead Me Out Of The Dark and will post a new chapter every day, starting tomorrow.
- I have also started a new fic called Hell of a Night which is a horror story in which you, the readers, decide what happens by voting at the end of every chapter. This is all planned out but I will be writing chapters as and when you vote so updates won't be daily.
- I will also "remaster" my personal favourite story The Void You Left Behind. I posted that on AO3 last year but if you haven't read it already, I suggest you hold off until I post the updated version here because I promise I will make it even better!!
- Lastly I have tons of multi fic stories as well as one shots planned. Both for BNHA and my fav kpop bands. 😊
I would be so happy if you decided to follow my new blog and support me like you did on here. I will do my best to post as much and as quick as possible but please be patient with me if that doesn't always work out. This year has been as terrible for me as it has been for almost everyone. My company is currently making a shit ton of people redundant so it might be that I will be affected. If that happens, finding a new job will be my priority but I will tell you guys if I need to take a break because of that.
Most of all I hope that you're all doing well and I really hope 2020 hasn't gotten to you too much my little beans 🥺😟
Please always feel free to reach out via ask or DM on @katsubuns or my personal blog @krissykiwi . I'm always happy to chat with you guys and missed you lots!!!
Lastly I want to quickly thank everyone in my discord server. You guys have been my rock this year and I love you all so much! If you haven't already, please join us in my discord 🥺💖 (link is in bio)
Anyway, thanks for reading and hopefully see you on @katsubuns 🤩 MWAH 💖
p.s. hey hate anons, don't even waste your time, I'm able to deal with your bullshit now and hate will be blocked, reported & ignored 🧚♀️💋
Warnings [angst; spice (kinda smut?); cheating I guess (oof), alcohol... (recipe for disaster really.)]
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So this is part two of my story Two Words. You can find part one here.
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I wasn’t going to write a second part to this, but many people have asked so I decided to deliver. Please blame @lady-bakuhoe for the plot. She gave me the basic idea for this, so please don’t be mad y’all ... I hope you like it!!
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(also please be gentle I suck at writing anything remotely nsfw so yeah)
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Katsuki wasn't sure why he had agreed to go out with his friends, but he felt instant regret the moment he walked into the club. He spotted his former UA classmates sitting at a table in the corner, far away from the dancefloor. At least one good thing about tonight.
Without meaning to, his eyes immediately looked for you. He wasn't proud of it, but even after so many years, he was still in love with you. But you were also still very much married to his best friend. He hated the situation, but it was beyond his control
It wasn't as though he didn't try to move on. In fact, he had a girlfriend that he absolutely despised adored. At one point, he knew that he had to let go. He knew that you were happily married and he would never get between you and his best friend. Which was why he had agreed to go out with this woman about a year ago. She was as exciting as a glass of water, but at least he didn’t have to wake up alone every day.
Luckily, he managed to ditch her for the night, telling her that he would be going out with his former school friends and that she couldn't come. She had thrown a massive tantrum, but eventually calmed down when he promised to go out for brunch with her the next day. Brunch. He hated all these boring things she wanted to do with him.
She had no interest in working out or hiking like he did. She didn't even enjoy gaming or going to concerts. All she did was play Scrabble and go out for brunch. But at the end of the day, it was better than being alone for the rest of his life.
He mentally prepared himself for the pain he always felt when he saw you with his best friend, but to his surprise, that didn’t happen. You were there, smiling and waving at him, but Eijiro was nowhere to be found.
"Guys! Katsuki is here!” You exclaimed, and even through the booming noises of the club, he could hear every tone that left your lips. He loved your voice, it was like a melody.
Katsuki just nodded hello at everyone and looked for an empty seat. The chair next to you was vacant, and he eyed it, not sure whether Eijiro would come back soon. You smiled at him and patted the soft cushion of the chair. “Come sit next to me,” you said, and he did as you asked.
“Where’s Eiji?” Katsuki asked you.
You sighed. “Yet another mission out of town. He won’t be back for a few days.”
The blonde could tell how annoyed you were, but he couldn’t help himself from feeling the opposite. He cared about Eijiro a lot, but having you to himself for at least a few hours was a gift that he hadn’t expected. Suddenly, he was glad that his friends had convinced him to go clubbing.
For the next few hours, you were all talking, reminiscing your days at UA and laughing over the stupid stuff you used to do. You weren’t much of a drinker, but because of the good company and the fact that someone always ordered a new round, you lost track of how much you had had to drink. You felt fine, though, ecstatic even. So you jumped up, the sudden movement giving you a head rush that you chose to ignore. Instead, you yelled out. “Let’s go dance!”
Most of your friends agreed and unsurprisingly, Katsuki decided to stay behind. You looked at him and pouted, melting his resolve before you even said a word. “Kaaatsuuuu! Please come dance with us!”
“I don’t dance.”
You held out your hand, intensifying your pout. How was Katsuki supposed to say no if dancing meant he got to hold your hand? With a low growl, he got up and took your hand. “One song.”
You smiled at him, and his heart skipped a beat. Why did you have such an impact on him? After so many years, he was still bound by the spell you had cast on him.
One song turned into five. Katsuki forgot everything he said he would do and got lost in the lights. Got lost in you. The music was loud, but his heart was beating louder. The dance floor was crowded and hot, but he felt a shiver run down his spine whenever he touched you. His body tingled with every move you made. You had him trapped, but he didn’t want to escape. Part of him knew that it was wrong to admire you like this, but he didn’t know how to quit.
Your body was glistening in the flashing lights, and all Katsuki could think about was how badly he wanted to rip off the dress you were wearing. It took so much of his resolve to keep his hands to himself, but he knew that it was the right thing to do.
It turned out that him holding you would have been for the best, though. Because when the DJ started playing a slow-paced song and you asked Katsuki to slow dance with you, you somehow managed to stumble over your own feet. Resulting in you falling onto the floor. You tried to get back up, but your ankle was killing you. You looked at Katsuki, tears in the corners of your eyes and a big pout on your face.
He just sighed, slightly disappointed that he didn’t get to slow dance with you but also not surprised by your clumsiness. He knelt down and swiftly scooped you up, holding you bridal style. You were both drunk, so you didn’t even notice the intimacy in his action. He carried you over to the table where some of your friends were still sitting.
“What the hell happened?” Mina exclaimed with a look of worry on her face.
Katsuki raised his eyebrows. “That drunk dumbass fell over her own feet,” he said, letting you down and helping you sit on a chair.
“It really hurts,” you whined.
Mina looked at you with confliction in her eyes. She really didn’t want to leave as she was hoping to finally hook up with Hanta, but her best friend needed someone to get her home. “I can le-” But she was interrupted by Katsuki.
“Don’t worry, Raccoon Eyes. I’ll get her home,” he said, helping you up once again.
Mina just nodded, clearly relieved. “I’ll call you tomorrow,” she promised before giving all her attention to the man sitting next to her.
You just shook your head. Hanta and Mina had had a mutual crush on each other for the longest time, and you genuinely hoped they would finally get it on. You looked at your other friends, and they were equally as busy. Half of them were still on the dancefloor, the others were scattered around the club. None of them really realised that you were leaving, but you didn’t mind. You were drunk and in pain and just wanted to get out of that place.
Katsuki was holding onto you, giving you support as you limbed your way out of the club. When you stepped outside, the chilly evening breeze hit you, and it made you realise just how drunk you really were. You looked at Katsuki and could tell that he too, was drunk. “I don’t think I can make it home,” you whined.
“My place is closer, you can stay there tonight,” he suggested. “Besides, it seems like you need someone to take care of your drunken ass.”
You nodded and laughed a little. “Thanks, Katsuki. I really appreciate it.”
And so you started walking towards his place, neither of you was saying a word. Katsuki was too busy keeping his thoughts at bay. You were so close to him, and you would be staying the night at his place. He couldn’t quite believe that this was happening. It was like the perfect night, all he had ever dreamed off. If only you weren’t married to his best friend and he wasn’t in a relationship with a woman that wasn’t you.
He knew that he had to control himself. He knew that you were nothing more than friends and that he couldn’t make his feelings obvious. Sure, you were both drunk, but at the end of the day, that wasn’t an excuse for him to make a move on you.
He could feel you flinch beside him and looked down at you. “What’s up?”
“I can’t walk anymore,” you said, your eyes filled with tears. “Just leave me here on this bench. I’ll get a taxi home.”
Katsuki scoffed and shook his head. “Don’t be stupid, idiot.” Without another word, he picked you up once more, holding you bridal style as he had done in the club.
Only that this time, you both realised how intimate of a gesture this was. But neither of you tried to change the situation. You were just standing there on the pavement, lost in each other’s eyes.
You didn’t know what was happening, but there was electricity in the air, and your body started tingling. You averted your gaze, realising that whatever this was, you weren’t supposed to look at Katsuki like that. No matter how drunk you were, you knew that it was wrong.
Katsuki carried you to his place without saying another word. Both of you felt that there was something greater than words could describe, but both of you knew that it wasn’t supposed to be there.
When you arrived, he carried you into his living room and placed you on the sofa. “Wait here, I’ll get you some ice for your ankle.”
“Thanks,” you said, suddenly hyper-aware that you were in Katsuki’s apartment. Alone. Just you and him. It made you feel a multitude of things, and you were so confused.
Katsuki returned with a bag of frozen peas and a couple bottles of beer. “That’s all I had,” he said.
“You’d think a pro hero would be better equipped for injuries,” you laughed.
He raised his eyebrows. “Villains don’t even get the chance to lay a finger on me,” he grinned.
“Maybe I need to start working with you then,” you said. “I’m not proud to admit that I get my ass kicked regularly.”
He clicked his tongue. “Tch. You’re the strongest person I’ve ever met. You can take care of yourself.”
You couldn’t help but blush. Katsuki wasn’t very good when it came to giving compliments, which was why this meant a lot to you. “That was awfully nice of you.”
“I’m always nice to you.”
You wanted to laugh at his statement, say something witty, but you couldn’t come up with anything. It was then that you realised that he was right. He was always nice to you. Which was why you had always thought that you were somewhat special to him. But you had learned years ago that that wasn’t actually the case.
For a moment, you both were quietly sipping on your beer, both lost in your own thoughts. Eventually, you spoke up, though. “This is pretty nice, you know.” He looked at you, confused. “Us hanging out like that. I can’t remember the last time it was only the two of us.”
The look he gave you was unlike anything you had ever seen on him before. “Me neither. I guess it just kinda stopped.”
“Hmm,” you said, nodding in agreement. “It’s a shame, really. Back in school, I thought we’d always be like that.”
He raised his eyebrows. “What do you mean?”
You started blushing violently, not knowing whether you should say what was on the tip of your tongue. But the alcohol in your blood made the decision for you. “I dunno… I guess I kinda had a crush on you.” You looked at him, gauging his reaction. When he didn’t explode on the spot, you couldn’t stop yourself from letting out more of the truth. “There was a time when I was hoping we’d marry someday,” you said, masking your vulnerability with laughter.
But Katsuki didn’t laugh. He couldn’t believe what you were saying. You had had a crush on him? He had been so convinced that you’d never return his feelings. “This isn’t funny.”
You immediately stopped laughing. “I’m sorry, Katsuki. I-”
“Are you serious?” He couldn’t hide the pain he was feeling. The suffocating feeling of realising that he had missed his chance.
You swallowed. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable, I jus-”
“Tell me. Do you mean it, or are you just fucking with me?” His tone had changed so much, and you were utterly confused.
You tried to hide your blush but failed miserably. “I mean it, Katsuki. I wouldn’t be joking about that.”
“Then, why were you laughing?”
You shrugged your shoulders. “I guess I was afraid of your reaction, so I tried to play it off. Sorry for making things awkward.”
He shook his head, his eyes not leaving yours. “I can’t fucking believe this. Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Well… I knew you weren’t feeling the same, and I didn’t want to ruin our friendship by confessing,” you admitted.
“Fuck,” he just said, jumping up from the sofa. He started walking up and down the room, seemingly trapped in an internal struggle.
“Katsuki, wha-”
He stopped, looking at you. “(y/n)... I-”
This time it was him who was stopped before he could finish his sentence. Your phone started ringing and made you both jump, not expecting a call so late at night. You picked up immediately, thinking that something might have happened to Eiji.
“Hello?” You asked.
“Are you okay, (y/n)?” You could hear the concerned voice of your husband from the other end of the phone.
You swallowed hard, and you couldn’t help but feel as though Eiji had interrupted a significant moment. “Y-yeah. Why are you asking?”
“Well, Mina rang me, and she was in tears, saying you suddenly disappeared,” he explained.
You sighed. “Geez, she must be really drunk then because I said goodbye to her before leaving.”
“Weren’t you supposed to share a taxi home?”
You hesitated for a moment. “Well, yeah. But I hurt my ankle, so I wanted to leave early.”
“Shit, are you okay?”
You nodded your head as though he could see it. “Yeah. Katsuki left with me, and he’s helping me with the swelling. I… I’m staying at his place tonight.”
It was quiet for a few seconds, but then you could hear your husband sigh in relief. “If you’re with Katsuki, then I know you’ll be okay.”
There was another moment of silence, which was interrupted by noises from Eijiro’s end. You could have sworn that you could hear the hushed voice of a woman. “Eiji, what was that?” You asked him.
Silence.
“Hm? What do you mean?”
You didn’t know why, but his reaction bothered you. It seemed as though he was playing dumb. “I thought I heard someone in the background.”
“Oh that must have been the TV,” he said, way too quickly for your liking.
But you let it slide. “Oh, okay.”
“Well, if you’re okay then I’ll let you rest now,” Eiji said. “I’ll text you tomorrow.”
There was something about the tone in his voice that concerned you, but you couldn’t quite put your finger on it. “Okay. When will you be back?”
There was a long silence before he eventually spoke up. “I think we’ll be finishing off the mission by Sunday afternoon. I’ll probably head back first thing on Monday.”
“Oh, right,” you simply said. There was a time in your relationship when Eiji would have come back the moment the mission was over. Nothing could keep him from you, even if it meant travelling through the night.
You already knew that those times were over, though.
“Goodnight, (y/n),” he simply said.
You grimaced a little, the way he said your name sounded foreign. “Night, Eiji. I-”
But before you could finish, he had already hung up. It left you dumbfounded. You didn’t know why he had cut you off like that, but you tried to tell yourself that he simply didn’t realise that you were still talking.
Lost in your thoughts, you completely forgot that Katsuki was still in the room, looking at you intently. “You okay?” He eventually asked, his voice bringing you back to reality.
You nodded. “Y-yeah, sorry.” You were still very much drunk and tried hard to reason with yourself, attempting to push the odd feelings to the side.
“Did something happen with Eijiro?”
You looked at Katsuki and saw genuine concern in his eyes. This side of him made your heart beat ten times faster. This was the guy you had fallen for all those years ago. The guy that you had given up on. You couldn’t help but let your mind wander. Trying to imagine what would have been if you had confessed to him. What could have been.
Those thoughts reminded you that you had been mid-conversation when Eijiro had called you.
“Sorry for spacing out like that. What were you going to say?” You asked him. “Before Eiji rang, I mean.”
He just looked at you, unsure of what to say. He felt as though there was something else on your mind and he didn’t know whether now was the time to tell you all that he had to say. “That can wait, (y/n). Tell me what’s up. Something’s bothering you.”
He walked towards you, sitting down on the sofa. You couldn’t look at him, feeling stupid for saying out loud what was on your mind. Katsuki placed his hand on your knee, silently encouraging you to look at him. “It’s okay if you don’t want to talk about it. But I’m here if you change your mind,” he said.
He was about to get up again when you placed your hand on his, telling him to stay.
The moment your hands touched, sparks ignited from your hands. They were almost visible, ricocheting off the walls, filling the room with electricity. It was thrilling, exhilarating almost. And you realised quickly that you had entered dangerous territory.
You retracted your hand and nervously placed it on the side of your face, tucking some of your hair behind your ear. You took a deep breath and looked at Katsuki. “To be honest… I don’t know what’s going on, but I feel as though Eiji and I are drifting apart.”
“Oh?” Was all that Katsuki could respond with. He didn’t really want to play couple’s therapist for the woman he was in love with and her husband.
You sighed. "It might be in my head, and maybe I’m just drunk and emotional, but… Eiji has been so distant lately. He’s on missions in different cities almost every weekend, and I know he has to do that as part of his job but… there’s this rift between us and it scares me.”
“I understand why it would scare you, (y/n). But I’m sure he isn’t up to anything… If that’s what you’re implying,” Katsuki said.
You shrugged your shoulders. “That’s the thing, Katsu. I’m not scared of him leaving me or anything… I’m scared because the thought doesn’t frighten me as much as it used to.”
“What do you mean?”
You took a deep breath. “It’s hard to explain, but… There was a time when Eijiro being away was difficult, the thought of him distancing himself was upsetting. And now… I’m still upset because he’s so distant, but not because I miss him. It’s more that I don’t miss him as much as I should, and I feel guilty because of it.”
Katsuki swallowed hard. “I thought you guys were happy.”
“So did I,” you said with a sad smile. “But I think over the years things have changed. I don’t know what exactly happened, to be honest. Maybe I was never as happy as I thought I was.”
“I’m sorry, I think I’m too drunk to comprehend what you’re saying.”
You sighed. “I’m saying that, maybe, I’m starting to realise that I married the wr-”
The blonde interrupted you before you could finish your sentence. “Don’t.”
“W-what do you mean?”
He shook his head. “Don’t say it. Please, just… don’t.”
Katsuki seemed so vulnerable, and it left you confused. But then you realised that you were making him uncomfortable. “Shit, I’m sorry,” you said, making him look at you. “I know that you have a girlfriend and Eiji is your best friend. I don’t know what’s gotten into me,” you rambled on. “I guess I’m just drunk and confu-”
Before you could finish, Katsuki’s lips silenced you.
You were shocked at first, but it didn’t take long for you to reciprocate the kiss. You had no idea what you were doing. You knew that this wasn’t right, but your heart was speaking a different language than your head.
When your lips parted, Katsuki jumped up, seemingly shocked by his own actions. “F-fuck,” he said, pacing through the room as he had done earlier. “I’m sorry.”
You shook your head, and your eyes started filling with tears. You acknowledged then that, yes, Katsuki really was the one that got away. And now everything was messy and complicated, and you didn’t know what you were supposed to do.
“Don’t be sorry, Katsuki.”
He stopped to look at you. “I don’t know what’s going on, but this isn’t right,” he said with a low voice. It almost sounded as though he wanted you to disagree with him, tell him that it was okay.
But you didn’t say anything. You didn’t know what to say.
“You don’t know just for how long I have wanted this,” Katsuki admitted. “But it’s nothing like I thought it would be.”
You swallowed hard. “I’m sorry.”
“N-no,” he said, his voice cracking slightly. “I feel as though we’ve missed our chance, (y/n). This isn’t just about us. Whatever it is we’re doing, will hurt Eiji and I can’t do that.”
You looked down. “You’re right. And I’m not the only one in a relationship. This isn’t right towards your girlfriend either.”
He just clicked his tongue. “Tch, like I ever truly cared about anyone but you.”
“W-what?”
He crossed his arms in front of his chest, looking at you intently. “I have loved you ever since you helped me out of the hole I had dug for myself. It’s always been you, (y/n). The only reason I tried to move on is that you married my best fucking friend. What was I supposed to do? Die alone? I don’t give two fucks about anyone that isn’t you.”
You swallowed hard. “Katsuki… I-” You didn’t know how to process his confession, and you couldn’t stop your tears from spilling from your eyes. “W-why didn’t you say so sooner? I would have never… things could have been different.”
He pinched the bridge of his nose. “It wasn’t just me who didn’t say anything, (y/n). You could have made the first step too, you know.”
“I was afraid to lose you, though.”
He scoffed. “As was I. And look where that got us,” he said. “Fuck.”
“Katsuki, maybe this was supposed to happen. I’ve always wondered what could have been and I th-”
He interrupted you. “Tell me why.”
“What do you mean?”
He grimaced. “If you loved me, then why did you go out with Eiji? Why did you fucking marry him if you had feelings for me? And why are you telling me about this now that it’s too late?”
“I don’t know,” you admitted.
He raised his eyebrows. “You don’t know? Are you serious?”
“I thought I could never have you, Katsuki. I thought that chasing after a love that would forever be unrequited would only hurt me. And Eiji was sweet and funny, and I felt as though I could be happy with him. And I was happy with him. It’s just…”
“It’s just what?” He asked.
You swallowed hard. “Something has been missing all this time, and I think deep down I always knew that it was you. I was just too afraid to admit that even after all these years, I still held those feelings for you. Because I knew that admitting it would make everything I built over the years a mess and that it would hurt. And I also knew that you didn't feel the same, so I tried to ignore it.”
“You didn’t know shit, (y/n). You assumed that I didn’t feel the same. You couldn’t have known, because it’s not true. I do feel the same. I always have. And it’s been killing me every single day since finding out that you chose to be with Eijiro instead of me.”
You couldn’t help but sob. “I’m so sorry, Katsuki.”
He looked away from you, not knowing what he was supposed to do. He was so angry. He was angry with you for choosing Eiji when it was Katsuki you had been in love with. He was angry with himself because he could have been with you if he hadn’t been such a coward. But mostly he was angry because he didn’t know what he was supposed to do now.
Now that this was out in the open, how could either of you just ignore it? How could you move past this, knowing that neither of you was truly happy and that deep down, you were both yearning for each other?
No matter what would happen, it would be messy and painful, and you weren’t in the right state of mind to fathom the consequences. You both knew that you had to sober up before having an actual conversation.
Maybe once the alcohol had left your bloodstream, you would both forget about what had happened. Perhaps you could pretend that whatever it was that you had confessed, was nothing but drunken nonsense. Maybe things didn’t have to be awkward once the sun was up.
“I think we should get some rest,” you said after a moment of agonising silence.
Katsuki nodded. “Yeah,” he said. “This is silly anyway, we’ll have forgotten about this by morning.”
“Yeah, you’re probably right.”
More silence. All you could hear was the beating of your heart and the silent screams to follow your desires. But you wouldn’t do that. And neither would Katsuki.
“You can stay in my spare bedroom,” Katsuki suggested. “Are you able to walk on your own?”
You sat up, putting your foot on the floor and trying to apply some pressure. It was tender, but it didn’t hurt as much as it had initially. The alcohol, coupled with your emotional distress, most likely numbed your physical pain.
You followed Katsuki down the hallway, watching him open the door to his spare bedroom and motioning for you to walk inside. You smiled at him. “Thanks for letting me stay here.”
He scratched his head. “Don’t worry about it. I’m just across the hallway if you need me.”
You simply nodded, unable to form a coherent sentence. Katsuki closed the door behind him, and you let yourself fall onto the bed with a loud sigh. Your thoughts were a mess, and you knew that you wouldn’t be able to go to sleep. Your body was tired, but your brain was in overdrive.
This all seemed so sudden, and yet, it wasn’t. Deep down, you had always known that you still had feelings for Katsuki. How could you have been too blind to see that he felt the same? Why didn’t you take the risk?
You felt incredibly guilty towards Eijiro. You felt as though you should have never accepted when he had asked you out all those years ago. You hadn’t been sure of your feelings back then, but you had thought that, maybe, dating Eiji would help you get over Katsuki. You should have ended things before they got serious.
You couldn’t help your tears from falling. What you were thinking wasn’t fair. It wasn’t true. Yes, initially you had been unsure of your feelings for Eiji. But that had changed once you had been dating for a while. You had been in love with him. But even still, you had never truly gotten over your feelings for Katsuki. You had just chosen to ignore them.
You had had an epiphany about your feelings a while ago, and you still remembered the exact moment. It was when you had met Katsuki’s girlfriend for the first time. Until then, he had always been single, and you were used to him being around all the time. But seeing him with another woman had been painful, and you didn’t know what the feeling was at first. But it got stronger with every time you saw the two of them together, and it quickly turned into what you identified as seething jealousy.
You remembered one particular evening when you had gone out for dinner together. Eiji and Katsuki’s girlfriend had been engaged in small talk, while you were just sitting there, poking your food. At one point, you had looked up and noticed that Katsuki had been looking at you the entire time. You remembered how intense his stare was and how you couldn’t read what was written behind those crimson irises.
You knew then that your feelings were still very much present, simply tucked away in a box in the back of your mind. What you hadn’t known then was that Katsuki felt the same. You felt so stupid for not seeing it sooner.
It was during that time that your relationship with Eijiro had started deteriorating. You had blamed your busy work schedules at first. Then you had started blaming Eijiro for distancing himself. You could see now that you too, had distanced yourself. Without even meaning to do so.
It wasn’t as though you had stopped loving Eiji, your love had simply changed. You loved him like a best friend, and he was your family, he would always be your family. You just struggled to remember the last time you had felt passion at the thought of him.
You wondered if he knew that your heart wasn’t in it anymore. And whether he felt the same.
You closed your eyes, trying to fall asleep. You realised quite quickly that that wasn’t going to happen though. You were overcome with a sudden feeling of guilt. You couldn’t help but feel as though you were trying to convince yourself that things between you and your husband were mutually over. Anything to give you an excuse to walk through that door and give yourself to the man that had slipped through your fingers all those years ago.
You knew that what you wanted to do wasn’t right and that you should stop yourself from getting up from this bed. You knew that you had to talk things through with Eiji before anything else. You knew that things would get messy enough without opening that door you were now facing.
You knew that there were so many reasons for you to stop yourself from pressing down that door handle - but none of those reasons were good enough for you to stop.
You wanted to blame the alcohol for this, but you knew that your excessive thinking had sobered you up enough for you to be unable to blame it on an intoxicated mind. You knew what you were doing, but you couldn’t control yourself.
You didn’t know what you were expecting when you finally opened that door, but you certainly didn’t expect to find Katsuki standing there in the exact same position. His bedroom door was open, and he was just standing there, everything motionless except for his eyes. His eyes were glancing through the dark, trying to find consent in yours.
You both knew that you should be walking away. You should be closing those doors and go to bed. But there was something about the way Katsuki looked in the dim light of the moon that was shining through the window that told you not to leave. You knew that all you had to do was turn around. But your legs were rendered useless by the beating of your heart that was thumping throughout your entire body.
So instead of walking away, you projected all your emotions into your eyes, giving Katsuki the consent he had been searching for.
Katsuki knew as well as you did that this was so wrong but so right at the same time. He knew that once he would take this step, there was no turning back. But no matter how much he had tried to ignore what had happened between you earlier, there was something about you that kept bringing him in.
He had tried to reason with himself, told himself that your confession was nothing more than drunken ramblings. But both of you had sobered up now and made the conscious decision to leave your respective rooms, facing your feelings. His body tingled with every second he looked at you, and he could feel himself falling faster. Katsuki knew that he wouldn’t be able to quit once he took that step forward.
But for just one second, he ignored the voice of reason within him and gave in to what his heart was telling him.
The instant he wrapped his arms around your waist, he knew that there was a prize to pay for what he was doing. But at this very moment, no prize was too high. Not if it meant that he could finally feel your warmth after all those years.
And so he placed his lips on yours, kissing you with such urgency, as though his life depended on it. You kissed him back immediately, your lips pressing into his, desperate to feel him as close as possible.
He picked you up without another thought, your legs wrapped around his waist, grinding against his crotch. He let out a husky growl, and the sound left your head spinning. You placed your hands on either side of his face, afraid to lose his warmth for even a second.
You wanted to break every single clock around you so that time would stand still, allowing you two to cherish each other's presence for as long as possible. You had so much time to make up after all.
You wanted to make the most of every minute, make him yours and have him claim you as his. You had lost all control, all reason, all morals - the only thing on your mind was Katsuki. Part of you wanted to take this slow, but the hunger in the core of your very being wouldn’t be satisfied with that. You needed him. All of him.
Katsuki could feel it too. The hunger, the longing he had suppressed for so many years. He felt so ashamed for his pure lust, felt so guilty because he knew that giving in to his desires would cause a mess. But even still, he couldn’t help himself.
As he was stumbling forward with you in his arms, trying to find his bearings in the dark, he felt as though he could do anything. He felt as though he was capable of flight as long as you were with him. God, how long had he waited for this to happen?
He closed the door to his spare bedroom with a kick. There wasn’t anyone else around, but he did it anyway. Almost as though by closing the door, he would be able to leave reason and guilt on the other side of it.
Being with you within those four walls, the only sounds those of your beating hearts, he knew that something that felt so right, couldn’t be wrong. And so he loosened his grip on you, your lips detaching and eyes locking instead.
He asked you a silent question, and you nodded, allowing him to lay you down, hovering over you, and exploring everything that you had to offer.
It was a cold night, but you felt hot, Katsuki’s body lighting a fire in yours. By now, neither of you could deny that you had sinning on your mind.
Katsuki looked into your eyes, and you looked back. Crimson irises that held more love than you thought possible from the blonde male hovering over you. You would have lied if you said that you were void of any guilt, but it was this look in his eyes that allowed you to ignore anything that wasn’t him.
He sat up a little, lifting the black shirt he was wearing and throwing it across the room. You sent your hands to explore his toned torso, soft fingertips tracing the prominent muscles on his abdomen. He was built like a Greek god.
Effortless, he managed to make you switch positions. You didn’t think that he would be willing to give up control in bed, but you were finding yourself sitting on his lap, grinding yourself down on him and enjoying the growl you received in return.
You started unbuttoning the blouse you were wearing, and you watched Katsuki swallow hard. He must have wanted this as badly as you had.You tossed the fabric to wherever it was that Katsuki’s shirt had landed and wasted no time in undoing your bra.
The moment you revealed yourself to Katsuki, he choked a little. You were so flawless. Perfection wasn’t even cutting it close. A divine being that transcended human comprehension. He didn’t quite know how to put into words just what he was feeling at that moment.
“You’re perfect, you know that?”
You started blushing and playfully tried to punch his chiselled chest. “Shut up.”
He shook his head and caught your fist before you could even touch him. He placed a kiss on your hand, and you opened it, allowing him to intertwine his fingers with yours. There was so much love in the room, and it filled you with emotions that you didn't know existed.
You leaned down, capturing his lips in a searing kiss. Katsuki thrust up lightly, making you moan into him. That was enough - he regained dominance over the situation, switching positions without even breaking the kiss. He was hovering over you again, your hands intertwined with his, pinned next to your head.
His lips left yours and instead, he placed soft kisses on your jaw, travelling down your neck and exposed chest. He wanted to mark you so badly, leave bruises for everyone to see. But he knew that he couldn’t do that. Instead, he took extra time to explore your soft skin, feathery kisses and nibbles that left you mewling in ecstasy.
You didn’t expect Katsuki to be this gentle, and it blew your mind.
The way his tongue explored your breasts was sending your mind into a frenzy. The wet trail he left, leaving your skin sensitive to the chilly air in the room. Your quiet moans encouraged him to travel down your stomach, kissing your belly button, making you giggle a little.
It was adorable, and he would keep in mind that kisses to your tummy did that to you. Because he wanted to hear those giggles every day for as long as you let him.
When he arrived at the hem of your trousers, he let go of your hands, moving his own down to unbutton the garment. You lifted your pelvis a little, helping him peel off the remainder of your clothes. He managed to capture your panties with the same swift move, leaving you fully exposed to his hungry eyes.
He got up, standing at the foot of the bed to rid himself of his own pants. While doing so, he studied your naked body, and he knew then that he had never seen anything more beautiful in his life. He took a mental image of your body so that he would always remember just how perfect you looked sprawled on his white linen sheets.
He crawled back on top of you, and you could feel him between your legs. You both knew that this was the last chance you had to stop before it was too late. One move was all it would take to commit the ultimate betrayal.
You couldn’t help but shiver, not just because of the cold air in the room, but also because of the severity of the situation you were in. You started to realise that this was really happening and not just a fever dream.
Katsuki noticed you shiver and grabbed a blanket from beside you. He covered you both, trapping the heat of your bodies underneath the fabric.
This action, as trivial as it was, ignited a spark deep inside of you. Katsuki was so caring, and you knew that he truly loved you. This wasn’t just two drunk friends hooking up. This wasn’t being unfaithful for just the thrill of it. This was love.
And it was bound to happen eventually.
You didn’t know whether your thoughts were a way to tell yourself that this was okay, all you knew was that you wanted more. Needed more.
Your thoughts and doubts became tangled underneath the blanket, and you decided to push them off the mattress. There was no space for any of that. There was only space for you and Katsuki.
The moment your bodies interlinked, you both moaned out. Nothing had ever felt so right before. Having Katsuki by your side like this, felt unlike anything you had ever experienced. You struggled to find a word great enough to express the immense pleasure his warmth gave you.
It felt as though your bodies were made for each other, two pieces of the same puzzle. And now that the puzzle was complete, you didn’t want to ever let go of each other.
If this was wrong, then you didn’t want to be right. Neither of you could deny how good this felt. You hadn’t planned this at all, and yet here you were, your nails digging into the skin of his back, invigorating Katsuki’s desire to please you tenfold.
And as he thrust into you, softly worshipping your every move, you couldn’t help but reach your high with a moan so loud, it surprised yourself. Katsuki reached his own release shortly after, pulling out and ruining the sheets.
Your bodies were instruments, and by the end of the night, you knew precisely how to play them. You had created a melody so intricate, it was the most beautiful song either of you had ever heard.
Eventually, you fell asleep in Katsuki’s arms, and it felt so natural, as though you had done this many times before.
After a few hours of peaceful rest, you were woken up by a tingling sensation on your cheek. You slowly opened your eyes, blinking a few times to adjust to the light. The first thing you saw were crimson eyes looking at you, and you knew then that last night hadn’t been a dream.
You didn’t know what you were supposed to feel. You were afraid that Katsuki would regret what had happened, but judging by how he was caressing your cheek with the back of his hand, you guessed that he didn’t feel regret.
The question was what you were feeling. Deep down, you knew it. But the severity of it all caught up to, and you felt panic coursing through your body. You averted your gaze a little.
“I can’t believe we actually… did that,” you said.
Katsuki’s stomach dropped. He didn’t like the tone in your voice. You made it sound like regret. “Me neither.”
“What are we going to do now? I guess we were both drun-”
Katsuki interrupted you and retracted his hand. “Bullshit, (y/n). Blame the first kiss on alcohol if you must, but by the time we had sex, we were both sober.”
You swallowed hard. He was right. It was just that you were afraid. Terrified, even. Just yesterday everything was normal, and now it wasn’t. It wasn’t a bad thing, though. You knew that you didn’t regret giving yourself to the man you had loved for such a long time.
You just wished the circumstances would have been different.
It didn’t matter whether your relationship had already been a sinking ship, you had still betrayed the vows you had recited all those years ago. You felt guilty. You felt as though you should have talked to Eijiro before giving in to your feelings. But even though you felt guilty, you didn’t feel regret.
Katsuki took your silence the wrong way, though. He assumed that you were filled with regret, and it broke his heart. When he woke up, finding you sleeping next to him, it was like coming home for the very first time. But it seemed as though you didn’t feel the same after all.
He refused to believe that, though. Your night together had been so intense and sensual, it all but screamed how much you loved each other. He needed confirmation.
And so he asked a question, knowing that the answer had the potential to destroy him with the sound of two words.
“Do you regret what happened last night?”
He looked at you, and you looked back. Two pairs of eyes trying to read one another, hoping that this wasn’t the last time you would be as close as you were now.
While he was waiting for your answer, he couldn’t help but revisit the moment he thought to have been the worst of his life. Back then, he was also waiting for you to give an answer. Two words that had changed his life for forever.
When the words “I do” had left your lips on your wedding day years ago, they hadn’t been meant for him. But if you were to repeat them now, they’d be for him alone, and they would be just as devastating, if not more. They would mean that you felt regret.
Which was why Katsuki held his breath the moment your mouth opened, and he was bracing himself for the impact. Your answer held the potential to break his heart all over again. The question was still lingering in the air - did you feel regret?
When the door in front of you opened, you were equally confused and afraid. Yami looked from you to the scattered papers on the desk and back. He looked angry, scary almost, and you wouldn't have blamed him, you went through his stuff after all. But the fact that you had found a folder full of information about you made you feel as though it had been your right to see it.
"I didn't mean to go through your stuff," you said, hoping that would lead to a calm discussion about what the hell it was that he kept in this folder.
He scoffed. "And yet here you are, having done exactly that."
"I'm sorry but," you started, picking up the file. "What the hell is this?"
He just looked at you. He wasn't saying a single word, and if it wasn't for the loud beating of your heart, you could have probably heard the gears in his brain working. It felt like it took ages for him to reply, and it was suspicious. Was he trying to come up with a lie?
But then he started to look conflicted and sighed deeply. "Fine," he said, motioning you to sit on the bed. "I'll explain it to you."
You shook your head. "I'm not doing anything until I know what's going on."
"Alright then," he sighed, scratching his head. "You know I want to become a doctor, right?"
You nodded. Of course, you knew that. It seemed to be one of the only things you knew about Yami.
"Well, after meeting you and hearing about your case of amnesia, I got curious. I knew about cases where people only forgot selective things, but your memory loss is so specific. I feel like it must mean something, as though there's more to it," he explained.
You couldn't help but let out a deep breath. So he wasn't up to anything shady after all.
"I'm sorry, I should have told you. But I've been trying very hard to figure out what's wrong with you and maybe find a solution on how to bring back your memories," he said. "I'm sorry I haven't made much progress yet."
You shook your head. "Don't apologise, Yami," you said softly. "I really appreciate that you're doing this for me." You opened the file and flicked through the pages. There was a lot of trivial information and pictures from your time at UA from before you lost your memories. "I was just a bit freaked out when I saw this… extensive research."
He smiled lightly. "As you should. I think everyone would be," he admitted. "I really didn't mean any harm. The reason I didn't want to tell you about this was that I know how much you hate that your classmates are trying to jog your memory and I didn't want you to feel like I'm pushing you too."
Your gaze softened further, and you walked towards him, dropping the folder back onto the desk. You gave him a long hug. "I'd never think that of you," you reassured him.
For a while, you were just standing there, enjoying a warm hug. When you moved over to sit on the bed, you could tell that there was more on Yami's mind. "What's the matter?" You asked him.
He sighed. "I guess that now that this is out in the open, I might as well tell you everything."
You swallowed hard. You had no idea what Yami was talking about.
He was quiet for a moment, seemingly lost in thought, and you were giving him the space he needed. He could continue once he was ready. "The reason I couldn't take you home to my parent's place is that they kicked me out," he suddenly said. You looked at him in shock. "They wanted me to break up with you, said that a girlfriend was just getting in the way of my studies." He sounded bitter and upset. "They said a quirkless boy like me needs to work twice as hard and that I don't have time for girls."
You couldn't help but feel incredibly guilty. "I… I'm so sorry, Yami. I had no idea."
"It's not your fault," he said, his head hanging low. "I guess they're right. I have fallen behind in school and spend my time either with you or researching your amnesia."
"It's all my fault." You couldn't stop the tears from forming in your eyes.
His head shot up, and he looked at you intensely. "Please don't ever say that! It was my decision to be with you, my decision to help you. You are not at fault here, okay?"
You nodded, but you still weren't convinced. You couldn't stop blaming yourself. "S-so… You're living here?" You asked.
"Yeah," he said with sadness in his voice. "My friend is really nice about it. Doesn't even make me pay rent."
You nodded. "That really is nice of him." You looked around the room again and felt so incredibly entitled. You had a perfectly fine place in the dorms and decided to stay here, while Yami didn't have anywhere else to go. You knew that he didn't blame you, but you couldn't help but feel that it was your fault.
"You see," he began. "The reason I'm constantly so worried about you and about losing you is that you are literally all that I have left. If I were to lose you… I don't think I could deal with that."
Your heart started beating faster. Yami was such a sweet guy. You realised now that the times you had perceived him as pushy or too demanding, he honestly had just tried to look out for you, wanting to keep you by his side because he cared about you. You had done him an injustice, and you felt terrible because of it.
You looked into his eyes, and he almost looked like a lost puppy. Your emotions were still all over the place, a feeling of unease in the back of your head. And there also were those odd thoughts you had had of Bakugou. But for now, you decided to push this all to the side. For now, you would try to give Yami the comfort that nobody else was willing to give to him.
You could only begin to imagine just how alone he must have felt, keeping all of this to himself. But now you knew, and you would be there for him. You leaned back against the wall, motioned him to place his head on your lap before starting to absentmindedly stroking his hair. It was peaceful and quiet, and you were content. At least for the moment.
______________________
On the other side of the city when the door in front of Katsuki opened, he lost it. All the composure he used to have, it was all gone. He was a mess, pathetic at best. But he didn't care anymore. Nothing really mattered anymore. He had fucked up, and he had to tell someone. He needed someone to punch him in the face for what he had done.
He looked into the sleepy eyes of his best friend. Fucking great, he had woken him up. But the moment Eijiro realised who was standing outside of his room, he was wide awake. And when he saw the neverending stream of tears on his friend's face, all alarm bells went off. Something terrible must have happened. Something awful.
"H-hey, buddy," he began, opening the door further to let his friend in. "What happened?"
Katsuki didn't know what it felt like to lose the ability to speak. To be so choked up, that not a single word would leave his lips. He didn't know the suffocating feeling of trying to express yourself but drowning in your own tears instead. Until now.
He was unable to speak. Unable to breathe. Unable to form coherent thoughts even. Everything was mushy. Everything was lost.
It broke Eijiro's heart, he had never seen his best friend like this before, and quite frankly he didn't think he ever would. But here he was, the ever strong explosive boy reduced to nothing but tears.
He pushed Katsuki down onto his bed and was met with no resistance. He sat beside him, unsure of whether he should hug him or give him comfort in another way. So many unspoken boundaries between them had been broken the moment Katsuki showed up at his door, but Eijiro wasn't sure if physical contact would be one boundary too far.
So he didn't. Instead, he was sitting next to him, uneasy and nervous. Just what had happened?
After minutes of silence, Katsuki finally spoke up. His voice sounded croaky, every word met with a shudder of his body. Eijiro felt like crying out of sympathy. "I… I let her go." Was all he could bring out.
Eijiro's eyes widened, trying to make sense of what his friend had just said. "W-what do you mean, bro?"
"She… I mean I…" He stopped, taking a deep breath. God, he felt pathetic. "I ran into (y/n) like thirty minutes ago. She… she was going out, meeting that shitty boyfriend of hers. I tried holding her back but… I did a fucking terrible job."
Eijiro was speechless. Katsuki had tried so hard to deny his feelings, but with what he had just said and judging by how much of a mess he was, the red-haired boy didn't need any further confirmation. "Dude," Eijiro said. "What are you talking about? Did she run away?"
Katsuki simply nodded, and it was as though the ground was opening up underneath them, swallowing everything that was around Eijiro, replacing it with dread. She ran away.
Eijiro knew that, above all, he should be worried, he couldn't help but be overcome by anger, though. "Fuck it," he said. "You didn't do anything wrong."
Katsuki looked at him, bewildered. "W-what?"
"She's been behaving like a reckless brat lately. Let her get in trouble, it's not your fault. She wouldn't have listened to anyone in that situation," Eijiro said, immediately recognising the angry tone in his own voice. "I'm not trying to be an ass, she's like my sister, I love her to bits, but damnshe's been acting out lately." He sighed deeply and let himself fall onto his bed, looking up at the ceiling.
Katsuki was confused, his tears stopping for just a moment. His friend was usually such a ray of sunshine, never had a bad word to say about anyone. He had expected Eijiro to have a go at him, maybe even punch Katsuki in the face for letting you go. The reaction that Katsuki received instead was unlike anything he could have ever imagined. He didn't know what to reply, so he opted to stay silent.
And that was how it stayed for the longest time. Neither of the boys was saying a word, both lost in their own thoughts. Eventually, however, Katsuki spoke up. Words so honest bubbling out of him, like water from a spring. He would have never thought that he would ever say these things out loud, especially not to Eijiro, but it came out with a force that he wasn't able to stop.
"Looking at her hurts. It hurts more than I can put into words. You have no idea how hard it is to pretend that I'm not in love with her, that we didn't have this amazing relationship. Every time I see her smile because of him, a part of me dies. We never broke up, she just… forgot about me and everything we had. Fuck, I didn't even get the chance to make her fall in love with me again. Whenever I close my eyes, I see him touching her. Whenever I hear her talk about him, my ears feel like someone poured acid inside. She's telling people all about him, but she never talked about me like that, because we made this stupid decision to keep it to ourselves. And now everything is gone, and nobody will ever know about how in love we were. It's all just in my head now, and it feels almost as if it never even happened. This is all too much, and it's breaking me, man. I never thought I would say shit like that out loud, but I just… I just can't do this anymore."
The gravity of these words weighed heavy on both of them. Eijiro had suspected that you two had been a couple, but hearing it out loud was surreal nonetheless. His two best friends had hooked up without him even noticing. He was so curious, and he had so many questions; how long had you been together, and how did it all start? But he didn't ask any of that. It wasn't the time, and he knew that.
There was a long silence, neither of them knew what to say, or how to move on from Katsuki's heartbreaking confession. "Dude, I'm so sorry to hear about that," Eijiro eventually said. "I honestly don't know what to say. I can't even begin to imagine how much you must be hurting."
Katsuki sighed. Part of him already regretted spilling his feelings in the way he had. But the other part of him was glad to have it gotten off his chest. He had needed a friend tonight, and he was thankful beyond words to have Eijiro listen to him. "Thanks for being there for me, shitty hair," he said while looking down. "I appreciate it."
Eijiro swallowed hard. He couldn't think of a time in which his friend had ever been so honest, so raw with his feelings. This was no longer just about saving you from the person you were becoming, this was about so much more now. He had to save both of you, he had to reunite you. He took a deep breath. "We need to draw up a plan to get you two back together."
Katsuki raised his eyebrows. "No matter what plan you'll come up with, it's doomed. She's got a boyfriend, remember?" He couldn't hide the bitterness in his voice.
"Damn right she's got a boyfriend," Eijiro said, making Katsuki look at him. "And that boyfriend is you, buddy. You're supposed to be by her side, and we'll get you there. Just trust me."
Katsuki stayed silent for a moment. Your relationship was a sinking ship, but he didn't want to let go, he refused to let go. He was in love with you, and he couldn't just stop his feelings - love didn't work that way.
"Alright, what's the plan?" He eventually asked, making Eijiro's eyes beam. The red-haired boy knew that they would succeed if Katsuki was willing to put himself out there.
The two friends stayed up all night, talking and strategising on how to win you back. The sun was already rising when slumber finally overcame them, and they fell asleep on Eijiro's bedroom floor.
______________________
You, on the other hand, were wide awake the moment the first rays broke through the curtains of the shabby room you were staying in. Your neck was hurting so much; you must have slept funny. Trying to find your bearings, you shuffled around a bit and realised that Yami's head was placed on your chest. He was breathing steadily, still sound asleep. You smiled a little, incredibly happy that everything that had happened the previous night was nothing but a huge misunderstanding. You cared deeply about him and losing him would have killed you inside.
You could feel him moving in his sleep, making the cutest little noise. You couldn't help but giggle, which unfortunately woke him up. He blinked a few times, trying to adjust to the light. "Good Morning," he mumbled, letting out a big yawn and sitting up next to you.
You gave him a big smile. "Good Morning."
Looking at him made you happy and sad at the same time. You were elated by how much he cared about you, but the fact that it had lead to him staying in this place was making you feel terrible. You sighed a little. "Yami… I've been thinking, and I think we should see each other less often."
He immediately jumped up, panic in his eyes. His reaction was cute, yet irrationally erratic. "W-why? W-what did I do? Is it because of last night? I-"
But you stopped him with a soothing smile. "No, it's not like that at all, Yami," you said, trying to calm him down. "I just feel like we should be spending more time with school work, you know. You're clearly falling behind and so am I. If I think about it, the reason I was so angry with my friends for telling me to get my act together was not that they were wrong. It was more that they saw what I didn't see, and it pissed me off. They were right, though. You opened my eyes last night."
His facial expression changed completely. You couldn't read it at all. It was definitely one of surprise, but there was something else, he almost looked petrified. It didn't make sense. "W-what did I do?"
You took a deep breath. "When you told me about your ambitions of becoming a doctor, it reminded me of how much we have both worked for our dreams. I don't want to destroy what we have achieved so far. We're both close to graduation, and once we're out there in the real world, we can see each other as much as we want. Right now, I just think that we should concentrate on school."
You could immediately tell that he wasn't happy with your suggestion, but no matter what he would say, you wouldn't change your mind. This was in both your best interest and he would see that soon enough. "We can still call each other every day, so please don't be too upset," you said, standing up and placing one of your hands on his cheek. "And we can spend the weekends together too."
He gave you a weak smile, and it broke your heart a little. Eventually, he nodded, though. "I guess you're right," he said with a sigh. "I'm just afraid of losing you. It feels like my life would literally end if that were to happen."
You giggled. "You're a drama queen."
He just grimaced, not saying anything. It felt like this whole conversation had struck a large nerve with him.
"You won't lose me," you promised. "Never."
His smile returned, and he gave you a kiss on your forehead. Your heart was beating faster, it was such a sweet gesture, and no boy had ever done this to you before. It felt intimate and loving, and you tried to savour every second, but you couldn't, and it made you feel guilty.
"Are you okay?" He suddenly asked you.
You nodded. "Y-yeah I just feel like I should be heading home now."
He clearly didn't want to let you go, but agreed eventually and picked up your bag. You didn't need any of that after all, having fallen asleep without even changing into different clothes. He carried your bag outside, and you followed him quietly. You felt exhausted and as though you had an awful lot of thinking to do.
When you arrived back at the dorms, you could sense that Yami's mood had shifted once again. You looked around and saw the former number one hero standing in front of the dormitory building. You sighed. It seemed like someone ratted you in.
Yami next to you was tense, angry almost. He was seething, and it was confusing you. What had just happened? And why did it go completely over your head?
"You good?" You asked him.
He nodded, grinding his teeth. "Y-yeah. I gotta go home."
And with that, he turned around and walked off. He didn't give you a kiss, not even a hug. It was utterly unlike your boyfriend. You couldn't deny how worried you were, but at the same time, you knew that you had much more significant problems waiting quite literally in front of your door.
You walked up to the building, trying to shake All Might off with a polite smile. You knew that it wouldn't work when he cleared his throat.
"Young (l/n)," he said in his usual formal tone. "May I ask where you're coming from at this time?"
You looked at him, irritated. "No, you may not."
"It seems as though you have spent the night off school grounds. That's against the rules," he said calmly.
You crossed your arms in front of your chest, dropping your bag on the floor. "Who said that I did that? Ever thought that I might have done some early training?"
He sighed. "Nobody said anything, I walked by your room earlier to check in on you as I do every Saturday," he explained. "And you weren't there. Seeing you walk up with that boy… I'm not stupid, you know."
You scoffed but stayed otherwise silent. You didn't want to hear this, especially not from him. You accepted that your friends were right and that you needed to get your shit together, but you didn't want to take orders from the man in front of you. Whether he was the symbol of peace or not.
"I'm just concerned, young (l/n)," he said.
You couldn't help but snort. "Concerned as in? My teacher, who is concerned about my academic success? The former number one hero, who is concerned to see me straying from the right path? Or perhaps concerned as m-"
You could tell that he was getting angry with you. A sight that not many got to see from this usually calm and gentle man. "That's enough. We will continue this when we both calmed down."
You shook your head and forcefully grabbed your bag from the ground. You turned around and huffed. "No, we won't."
Can you give us a quick intro to your Discord? To see the general mood of the server. Funny anecdotes, etc...
Yes, of course! ☺ I thought instead of just talking about my own server, it would be nice to have some of the Thirst Squad leave their opinions:
We have lots of funny crackhead moments, but we're also like a family that gives each other support and love. And we're always SO happy when someone joins our cult family!!
A lot of us are busy with work and school, so there isn't a constant stream of messages at all times, but there's always someone who's active!
~~~
It's not all just fluff of course 🥴 We can be a bunch of thirsty people 😳 (The server is literally called Boku No Hero Thirst Squad) 😅
An example of what our 18+ NSFW channels look like 🥴🥴👌
~~~
My bestie and super-mod Eri has put a lot of effort into the server, so we have lots of cool stuff going on! ☺
~~~
I hope that wasn't too long and boring and you consider joining us!! 🥺💖
With a big smile, you entered the dorm building. It had been one month since you returned to UA and everything was going well. Your memories were still missing, and school wasn't going all that great... But you had Yami, which made everything else seem less important.
You had spent the first four months of your third year in the hospital, which meant that now there were only six months left until you would graduate. Even though at this rate, you felt like you wouldn't be able to catch up. If you were honest, you weren't bothered by it all that much at the moment.
You felt that the school was pushing you way too much. Your teachers were expecting you to train every day, almost relentlessly so. None of your classmates had to go through this harsh regimen. Yami had said that it was almost as though they were punishing you for having the accident and you couldn't help but agree. Why couldn't they treat you like the other students?
But then again, the other students were annoying you too. They were your friends, sure, but they were constantly treating you like a raw egg. They were probably just afraid that something would happen to you again, but you hated being babied like that. On top of that, they were still trying way too hard to bring back your memories. You didn't understand why. It wasn't like they couldn't remember, so why were they trying so hard?
There were days when you wanted to remember, but most days you were content with the situation. You only missed the memories of about one and a half years, it wasn't that big of a deal in the grand scheme of things. You were filled in on all the key events that had taken place, and you felt that that was enough information for now. If you'd remember one day, great. If not, that was fine too. You had Yami now, and you were making plenty of new memories.
You just wished your friends would get off your back. But they were nagging you about everything. Even about the fact that you were seeing Yami. For some reason, they had something against him, and it pissed you off. They didn't even properly know him.
"There she is," Mina said, pointing at you. She motioned you to come over into the common room where most of the girls in your class had gathered.
"I don't have much time," you explained. "I was going to call Yami soon."
Mina raised her eyebrows. "Didn't you just see him?"
"So what?" You shrugged your shoulders.
You could see your friends sharing a concerned look, and it annoyed you to no end. "What? You got a problem with that?"
Mina raised her hands defensively. "No, we just think that maybe you spend a little too much time with this guy. You know… seeing as we're about to graduate soon."
You huffed in response. Who was she to tell you what to do? "We're not trying to be rude here, (y/n)," Momo said. "We're just worried that you might have gotten your priorities mixed up."
You looked at her, not sure what to say. "My priorities mixed up? Since when do you decide what my priorities should be?"
"It's understandable that you're a bit confused, you have gone through a lot after all. But you're skipping the extra training sessions and seem to not even care about becoming a hero anymore. You used to have so many ambitions." Ochako looked genuinely concerned.
"Confused?" You said irritated. "I'm not confused. If anything, I'm probably the only one here who's thinking straight. You're all just little UA minions."
Your angry glare was met by shocked faces. Nobody said a word. These people were ridiculous, how could they call themselves your friends? They were clearly just trying to push their beliefs onto you. You turned around, ready to run to your room.
"Please just be careful," Mina said before you left. "This guy you're seeing seems to have a bad influence on you."
You scoffed. "Jealousy is an ugly trait, Mina." And with that, you left, quickly walking up into your room.
You regretted your words the moment you closed the door behind you. Fuck. You didn't want to argue with your friends, but you felt like they cornered you. What else were you supposed to do? You sat on your bed, head hanging low.
When your phone rang, you immediately picked up, unable to contain your sobs any longer. "(y/n)? Are you okay?" Yami asked from the other end of the line.
You stayed silent for a moment, trying to regain your composure. "N-no."
"What happened? Who do I have to beat up?" He asked, trying to make you laugh.
He succeeded, making you chuckle a little. "It's just my friends… They're still trying to keep me away from you. I thought they were alright after meeting you, but I must have been wrong."
He growled a little. "I'm sorry, (y/n), but in all honesty? Fuck them. Fuck all of them. I haven't done anything wrong, and yet they are conspiring against me. Against us."
You swallowed hard. He was right. They didn't have the right to make you feel bad about your decisions. Neither of them was perfect. Besides, these were your choices, your life, it was none of their business. "Y-you're right. Fuck them."
He sighed. "I just wish I could get you out of there. You deserve better."
"Maybe you can," you said, immediately falling silent afterwards.
You could hear the surprise in his voice. "What do you mean?"
"Well, maybe I could stay at your place for the night?" You asked. "Only if that's not too much to ask."
He stayed quiet for a moment, and you took it the wrong way. "Sorry," you whispered.
"Don't be silly, you don't need to apologise, it's just that… My parents would never allow me to have a girl over, especially not overnight," he explained.
You sighed. "They don't need to know, I'm sure I can sneak in and out somehow."
He fell silent again. "Hang on a moment." You could hear him talking to someone. It was quiet, mere whispers and you couldn't make out a single word. "I'm with… a friend at the moment and he said we can both crash at his place."
You swallowed hard. Were you really about to do this? Break the school rules and disappear for a whole night to stay at the house of someone you had never met before? Who was this friend anyway? "Won't your friend's parents mind us being there?"
"He lives on his own. He's a few years older than us." Everything he said raised more questions than answers, but you decided to trust your boyfriend. "I'll pick you up in twenty minutes."
You swallowed hard. "Okay, see you in a bit." And with that, you hung up.
You didn't know what you were doing. You were so angry with your friends, but was that really reason enough to run away? To say you were conflicted was an understatement. You knew you would be getting in trouble if anyone was to find out about this, but did you really care about the consequences? What were they gonna do? Kick you out? You most likely wouldn't be able to graduate anyway, so what was the point?
A new surge of anger flowed through your body, and you hastily grabbed a few things you might need, throwing them into a bag. Fuck this place and fuck these people. You had gone through so much, and they didn't seem to show any empathy. All they did was push you and try to dictate what you should or shouldn't do. It only took one month to realise that this environment was no longer a place of happiness. Instead, it was like being surrounded by strict parents that were never satisfied, no matter what you did or didn't do.
You quietly opened your door, not wanting anyone to hear you. It wasn't as though you cared whether you'd get caught or not, you just couldn't be bothered to talk to anyone right now. You managed to sneak out without any problems, but the moment you opened the door, you were standing face to face with one of your classmates.
You didn't expect anyone to come home so late, which was why you didn't pay attention when you opened the big door. The moment you bumped into Bakugou, you half expected him to shout at you for being clumsy. But he didn't. Instead, he was looking at you intently, his face mere inches away from yours.
"Where are you going?" He asked you. Was that concern in his voice?
You shrugged your shoulders. "Why do you care?"
He rolled his eyes. "Well, I don't," he lied. "Just asking is all."
"Okay well, then where are you coming from so late?" You asked back, knowing he most likely would tell you to fuck off.
"Training," he said. "Couldn't sleep."
Somehow, looking at Katsuki upset you, he looked so sad. It wasn't like he was your friend, on the contrary, he had majorly pissed you off when he was so aggravated towards Yami. But at the same time, he was the only one of your classmates that wasn't always on your back, telling you what to do. You knew that it was because he didn't care about you, but for some reason, you liked that better than being treated like a baby by everyone else.
"Are you okay?" You asked him.
No. He wasn’t. He looked at you. "Tch. Of course, I am. I always am."
You simply nodded. "That's good then."
"Yeah." Was his simple reply.
He wanted to kick himself. Why was he like this? Why was he choking up? He had talked to you so many times. Had kissed those lips and embraced this body of yours. So why was he unable to have a proper conversation with you now?
You nervously tapped your feet. "I best get going." And with that, you walked off.
"You're still not telling me where you're going?" He asked from behind you.
You turned around, giving him a small smile. "I'm not going to make you my accomplice. The less you know, the better."
His heart sank. He already knew you were going to see this blue-eyed creep. "I don't think that's a good idea. Stay here," he said, making you look at him in surprise. "Please."
His request caused a flurry of emotions inside of you. You didn't think he would care about whatever it was that you were up to, but apparently he did. You had figured that, out of all the people, he would be the one to not tell you what to do, but apparently, you had been wrong.
You didn't want to show your annoyance, he already seemed sad enough, but you couldn't help yourself. "Who are you to tell me what to do, huh?"
Ouch. Katsuki wasn't used to you being like this, especially not towards him. He was just looking out for you, that was his purpose after all. But no matter how much it hurt, it also angered him. Why were you so stubborn? What had gotten into you? You used to be so responsible, this wasn't you. "I don't know what's up with you, but you need to snap out of it. You're not acting like yourself and I thi-"
You interrupted him before he could finish his sentence. "I don't care what you think or have to say, Bakugou. You don’t know shit about me. I'm not acting like myself? How would you know?"
You looked at him, glaring eyes staring him down. It made him feel uncomfortable, what was he supposed to say? I know you because we used to be closer than I have ever been to anyone else before, you idiot. Instead of saying out loud what he was thinking, he stayed silent.
"I thought as much," you said. And with that, you walked off. Yami was already waiting for you. He didn't seem to be too happy, he had most likely seen you talking to Bakugou. But when you approached him, instead of saying anything, he pulled you in for a deep kiss. It took you by surprise, to say the least. "Let's go," he said when your lips parted.
You didn't realise that Katsuki had still been standing outside, that he had seen the passionate kiss you had received. You didn't realise how much it hurt him and how desperate he was. He had never hated himself as much as he did at that moment. Why the fuck did he let you go?
He wasn't stupid. He knew you so well, and he had realised that the reason you were doing all of this was that you had no sense of direction anymore. The accident had thrown you off, and you felt lost - like you had nowhere to turn to. He knew that the way everyone else was treating you was pushing you even further away, so he had tried to be different, be someone that wasn't telling you how to live your life.
But he certainly hadn't expected this situation to occur. Everything inside of him told him to go after you, carry you back if necessary. But he couldn't do that. It would make you even angrier with him than you already were, that would definitely ruin any chance with you.
But who was he kidding? He didn't have a chance with you either way. You were happily taken. Taken by a guy that wasn't him. Maybe his idea of winning you back wasn't that smart after all. How could he be so goddamn stupid to let you go. Let you wander off into the night. Fuck.
He could barely see through the tears in his eyes, and the fact that the building was completely dark didn't help. At least that meant nobody would see him cry on his way back to the dorm rooms. He was barely able to hold himself up. Pathetic.
You, on the other hand, felt stronger than ever before. You felt rebellious, as though you finally did what you wanted, not caring about the consequences. You held Yami's hand in yours, skipping on the dark pavement. The night was only illuminated by the moon and the flickering street lamps.
Yami had your bag thrown over his shoulder, holding it in place with one arm. He looked down at you. "I'm glad you seem to be doing better already," he said with a smile.
"Of course, I am. I'm with you, and I'm out of that negative place," you explained, making him blush. "By the way, you're cute when you're blushing."
He started laughing. "Shut up."
You giggled, looking at his handsome face. His grey hair almost looked sparkly silver in the dim light, and even though it was fairly dark, his eyes were still shining a bright blue.
"You really are a work of art," you suddenly said.
He burst out in laughter. "Gee, (y/n), you're pretty forward tonight."
"I just wanted you to know," you said, shrugging your shoulders.
He looked at you with a smile but didn't say anything. After a few more steps, he suddenly stopped. "We're here."
You looked away from him and scanned your dark surroundings. You hadn't even noticed how the street lamps had become more sporadic and how run-down this neighbourhood looked. You swallowed hard. "Are you sure?" You asked.
He chuckled. "Pretty sure. I've been here before I picked you up after all."
"I'm not sure about this, Yami," you said, suddenly realising the gravity of your decision.
He patted your head. "Don't worry, I'll protect you," he said. "Besides, it looks nicer inside than out here."
You hesitated but eventually nodded. What other option did you have? You didn't really want to go back to the dorms either. Anywhere was better than there. So you walked up the stairs to the apartment, feeling more than anxious. The moment you stepped inside, you realised that you were alone. "Where's your friend?"
"Oh, he had to leave," Yami explained. "Work called, so he'll be gone all night."
You nodded. At least that was some good news. You didn't really feel up for small talk with a stranger, even if he was Yami's friend. You looked around the apartment, and Yami was watching your every move. Everything was pretty run-down and dirty, there were clothes and empty beer bottles all over the place. You felt the urge to clean, but you didn't want to come off as picky. You were glad they offered you a place to stay after all.
"Come here," Yami said. "We can stay in this room." He motioned you to come with him, and you followed right behind your boyfriend. You entered a room that was a little less messy, but still, very run-down.
You saw Yami's backpack in a corner and a few files and papers on the small desk. Other than that, the room could have belonged to anyone. The only other furniture in the room was a small single bed and a wardrobe that had doors which didn't seem to properly close. He put your bag on the bed and scratched his head. "It's not much, but I hope it's alright for the night."
"It's great, thank you," you said, giving him a big smile. He returned the smile, and for a moment, it was silent. "Do you come here often?" You suddenly asked.
He looked at you, confliction in his eyes. "You could say that I guess."
"And your parents are okay with that?" You couldn't believe that they wouldn't allow girls in the house but were okay with their son staying at a place like this.
He shrugged his shoulders. "I'm just telling them I'm staying at a friend's place and they're fine with it."
"As long as it's not a girl" You concluded.
He chuckled lightly. "Pretty much." He took your hand and lead you to the small bed. It creaked when you sat down, and the noise made you jump a little. Yami was seemingly amused by that. "Don't worry, (y/n), I got you. Nothing can happen to you."
You simply nodded. You didn't even know why you felt so uneasy. Yami was right, he was there to protect you. He sat with his back against the wall, and you leaned against him. Soon enough, he had his arm around your shoulder, and your whole body felt like it was on fire. You realised that you had never been alone in a closed-off room together and it suddenly felt so much more intimate than ever before.
You understood now why he was upset about you being alone in a room with another guy, he probably pictured a similar situation. That would definitely make you jealous too. But you had never felt like this with any other guy before. It was blissful and calm, yet there was this tension in the air.
You didn't know what it was, but the fire inside of you was growing by the minute, and your body was almost moving on its own. What was this feeling? You tried to ignore it and instead make conversation with your boyfriend. "So what kind of job does your friend have?" You asked. "If they call him out in the middle of the night, he must be very important."
Yami was quiet for a minute, seemingly lost in thought. Just when you were about to check whether he had fallen asleep, he spoke up. "He works at this bar, and his boss is a real jerk. He always calls him at stupid hours with ridiculous jobs and requests. But he needs that job, so he can't refuse"
"Oh, I see," you said. "Sounds really stressful."
Yami nodded. "I guess you could say that."
The silence between you returned, and so did the warm and fuzzy feeling in your belly. You had no idea what it meant. All you knew was that it grew hotter every time you came closer to Yami. You turned around slightly, moving away from leaning against his shoulder and instead sat up straight. You looked at him, getting lost in his eyes as they were staring right back at you.
And that's when you realised that this feeling inside of you was desire. You wanted to be close to Yami. Wanted to touch him and have him touch you. You weren't planning on going all the way, that was still way too early, but you did want to kiss him and get lost in your feelings.
He looked as though he was in a trance. "What are you thinking about?" You asked him.
He started blushing. "I'm thinking about how badly I want to kiss you," he admitted.
Your heart was beating way too fast, you almost expected it to explode. "Then do it."
And with that, he moved closer, cupping your face with his large hands, making you melt between his fingers. His lips were so soft and perfectly matched with yours. So far, you had shared nothing but innocent, yet passionate kisses. You realised quite quickly that this was about to change.
You had never made out with another person before, and you couldn't even begin to describe the sensation. The fire inside of you grew further, desire almost overpowering every other emotion in your body. Before you knew what you were doing, you were sitting on Yami's lap, your arms wrapped around his neck, whereas his arms were softly placed just above your bum.
You wanted more. You needed more. There was this hunger in the very core of your being, and only Yami could satisfy the craving. You started moving a little while still sitting on top of him, causing friction between you two. Yami let out a surprised and raspy moan. It was the most enticing sound you had ever heard.
You didn't know what was happening to you, but you needed more. Your feelings were all over the place. Only minutes ago you told yourself that you wouldn't go all the way, but that resolve was gone. You wanted to explore all of him and have him explore all of you.
Your lips parted from his, and he gave you a little pout. You giggled and moved your hands towards your blouse, starting to unbutton it slowly. You watched his reaction, his eyes had darkened significantly, and he looked just as needy as you felt. You continued unbuttoning your shirt while he started kissing the newly exposed skin on your neck.
You let out a shaky breath and could feel him smirk against your body. You pressed into him, feeling him grow between your legs. The moment you noticed it, you looked at him in shock. Was this actually happening? He looked back at you, but what you saw before you, shocked you even more than what you could feel pressing against your thigh.
For a split second, it wasn't Yami's face that you saw in front of you; instead, it was that of a different boy. Bakugou Katsuki.
You swallowed hard, trying to ignore what had just happened. Yami looked at you, a silent question to ask if you were okay. You nodded, continuing to undress. You could feel him looking at you, so you looked up, meeting his gaze.
Bakugou.
You closed your eyes. Taking a deep breath. You dared to take another look.
Bakugou.
What was going on? Why did you see his face instead of your boyfriend's? You felt so bad, almost as though you were cheating. But the weird thing was that you didn't feel like you were cheating on Yami. You felt like you were betraying Bakugou and you had no idea why.
It was this sinking feeling, dreadful almost. A feeling that you couldn't put into words. The hunger you had felt only minutes ago was gone, and instead, you felt sick. Yami realised that something was wrong and placed one of his hands on your face. "We don't have to do this if you're not feeling comfortable," he said in a soft tone.
You shook your head. "It's not that," you assured him. "I'm just feeling a bit dizzy."
He looked almost guilty. "Maybe I went a little overboard," he mumbled.
"What was that?" You asked.
He shook his head. "N-nothing." He picked you up from his lap, gently placing you next to him. "Let me grab you some water. I'll be back in a minute."
You watched him hurry out of the small room, and it left you even more confused than you had been before. You tried to calm yourself down, tried to make sense of what had just happened. Somehow, you felt uneasy, you didn't know whether it was because of these unfamiliar surroundings or because of the fact that you couldn't stop thinking about your blonde classmate.
Your eyes wandered around the almost empty room, and your gaze got stuck on the stack of papers on the old desk. You didn't want to snoop in your boyfriend's possessions, but you were curious. It was probably nothing more than school stuff, nothing you weren't allowed to see.
So you quietly got up and walked over to the desk. You lifted some of the papers and were somewhat relieved when all you found was Yami's maths homework and an essay on what he wanted to do after school. You smiled a little, you knew that he wanted to become a doctor. However, it was a difficult profession to get into without having a medical-based quirk. But he was working hard, and you knew he would make it.
You opened the small folder that contained the essay, but you found the first page to be completely empty. You flicked to the next page. There was a single word written in blue ink: destroy. You swallowed hard and looked at the next page: all. You were sweating and had no idea what to expect on the next page.
But before you could take a look, you could hear Yami come back. You panicked and tried to put everything in the same place as it had been before. By doing so, however, you knocked the stack of papers over, revealing something that you definitely weren't supposed to see.
You swallowed hard and tried to ignore the loud beating of your heart. It was beating so loud that it almost felt as though it was knocking on your chest, pleading for you to open your rib cage and let it jump out so it could run to a place where it could feel safe. You had the urge to run as well, but there was nowhere for you to go. All you could do was listen to the knocking in your chest, waiting for the door to open.
You weren't the only one who was still wide awake, afraid and uncertain. Katsuki was exhausted and desperate, he wanted to be alone, run away to better days. And yet, here he was, knocking on a door that wasn't his.
You were far apart from each other, caught up in entirely different circumstances. Nevertheless, you both felt scared, and neither of you knew what to expect once the doors in front of you would open.
I love how that anon thought that they knew your love life like tf??? 1. Anon, mind your business. "YOuvE neVEr bEen iN lOVe beForE" like you know something. You really thought you were doing something. Everyone has different love lives. No one's supposed to go by your or a "general" possibility of falling in love. I promise they act like you didn't plan this story out.
Well 👏 said 👏 you 👏 little 👏 bean 👏💖
People like that really think they know everything 💀 Acting all high and mighty like they're book critics 🤡
Sorry I can't continue reading LMOOTD. Your writing is ok but there's things that really bug me. 1. (y/n) is dumb. How can she not realize that Yami is manipulating her? 2. Why is Bakugou so whiny instead of fighting for her? Why didn't he tell Kirishima the truth? 3. (y/n) seems like an asshole, she's not a nice person. Why does Katsuki love her so much? You clearly haven't been in love before otherwise you would be able to explain why he feels that way about her. Fall in love and try again.
That’s fair enough, I don’t expect everyone to like my stories, so thanks for telling me. Please allow me to answer your points though.
1. (y/n) is not dumb. It seems that luckily, you’ve never been in an abusive relationship. It doesn’t matter whether it’s physical or psychological abuse, the victim often doesn’t realise what is going on. I have based this on my own experience. I had someone in my life who manipulated and isolated me and I didn’t notice it. I was in the mindset that they would never harm me and everyone who said otherwise was just jealous. By the time I started to feel a bit uneasy, I still tried to tell myself that they would change. It’s surprisingly easy to fall into the trap of an abusive relationship and just as surprisingly hard to escape from it.
You need to remember that we as readers have the privilege to look at it from another perspective. She doesn’t have that. All she sees is that she lost her memories, spent months in the hospital and now everyone expects her to be like she used to be. But how could she? When she went through such trauma? In her mind, Yami is the one person she can relate to because she feels as though they share this trauma. Can you really blame her for closing her eyes and trying to ignore the red flags?
2. Bakugou isn’t whiny, he’s in shock. Everything was okay until all of a sudden it wasn’t. How would you react if your partner, the person you love, suddenly forgets about your time together? And how is he supposed to fight? In her mind, they’re nothing more than classmates. He can’t just suddenly flirt with her or try to win her over. They’re not even friends, why would she accept his feelings? And if he was to tell her that they had been a couple, that wouldn’t change her feelings either. You can’t force someone to love you back. At this point in the story, he can’t even spend time with her because he can’t catch her alone. What I’m trying to say is that there is no way for him to fight right now. So instead, he’s upset but puts her feelings first. That doesn’t mean he’ll never try to win her over again. This is a Baku x Reader fic after all…
As to why he didn’t tell Kirishima the truth. I think I explained that in the latest chapter. Kiri is (y/n)’s best friend and Bakugou is afraid that she would find out the truth from Kiri. Apart from that, we all know how proud Katsuki is. He might be upset, but he’s not at the point of openly breaking down in front of his friend yet.
3. This one surprised me. Why is she an asshole? She lost her memories. She was in a coma. She forgot about most of her high school experience. Who wouldn’t be acting out of line? She doesn’t know where she belongs. She’s lost and unsure of the future. That makes her human, not an asshole.
As to why Katsuki loves her… I’ve been putting little flashbacks of their relationship into chapters since chapter three. I don’t like to information dump. I prefer dropping in memories as and when they fit the story and mood. I’m pretty sure I am explaining why he loves her… I already talked about some things he loves about her, but as the story goes on, there will be more memories of them. And obviously (y/n) and Bakugou will interact more.
(But I guess you won’t be around to read that, so you just gotta take my word for it ✌)
Lastly - WOW! You’re right. I have never been in love before 🤯🤯 I have no idea how I’m supposed to explain this to my husby… Thanks for opening my eyes, anon 🤡
Oof that ended up way longer than I intended 💀 Guess I got carried away a little 😅👌
"Hi Yami," you chirped into the speaker of your phone when your boyfriend picked up.
But you were met with silence. "Yami?" You asked him. "Are you there?"
You could hear him sigh. "Yes I'm here, (y/n). Are you?"
"What do you mean? Of course, I'm here. I'm speaking to you." You had no idea what he was talking about.
"Well, it sure as hell didn't sound like you were there for me when I tried talking to you earlier." He appeared irritated, a tone you had never really heard from him before.
You were utterly confused. "W-what? We did talk earlier. You hung up on me, remember?"
"Oh don't give me that. I hung up because you were with another guy and it upset me." His voice was a lot deeper than usual. What was wrong with him?
You took a deep breath. "Yami," you said. "Are you jealous?"
"Do I have reason to be jealous?" He asked back.
You let out a sigh. "God no, Yami. Why do you even ask such a question?!"
"Excuse me for being concerned about my girlfriend spending time alone with another guy"
You didn't know whether you should be annoyed or not. You would never betray Yami like that, and you didn't like the implication in his statement. But at the same time, you thought it was quite adorable that he cared about you so much. "It's not like that at all, Yami. I swear on my life. We were just hanging out in my room, tal-"
He suddenly interrupted you. "You were hanging out in your room? Alone?"
"Well, yeah…" You swallowed hard when you realised that you had upset him.
"And how am I supposed to feel about that, huh?" He sounded genuinely hurt.
You bit your lip. What were you supposed to say? "I… I'm sorry, Yami. I didn't mean to upset you." Words couldn't describe how bad you felt about what you had done.
He sighed deeply. "It's fine. As long as you promise not to do this again."
Quite frankly, you were shocked by this request. No, it wasn't a request, it was more of a demand, but you couldn't really refuse him either way. Not after upsetting him so much. You cared deeply for Yami, but Eiji was like your brother, that was a hefty price to pay. "Yami, I know you're upset, but Eiji and I have known each other since we were little kids. He's like my brother. Please don-" But he interrupted you again.
"You’re my girlfriend, (y/n). And while I trust you, I don't trust any of these wannabe hero guys. Who knows what his true intentions are." He sounded so serious, and you didn't know how to handle the situation or what to say. So instead, you stayed silent. "I take your silence as a no then. Fine, if this is a one-sided relationship, then I don't know if this will work."
"Yami, no wait," you quickly said, tears on the verge of spilling from your eyes. You couldn't lose him, not like this.
He clicked his tongue. "I think I've waited long enough, (y/n). Do you know how much I sacrifice for you? I skip after school activities to be with you, and I'm falling behind in class because I spend my evenings talking to you instead of studying. I even stopped talking to all my female classmates, so they don't get the wrong idea. Hell, I'm carrying a picture of you around so that everyone knows I belong to you," He paused, making you feel even worse than before. You didn't know what to say. You had no idea that he gave up so much for you. "I'm doing all of this because I'm in love with you and I get nothing in return. You're always either training or hanging out with people that don't even deserve your time. Not a single one of them was there for you when you were in the hospital, and now that you're back, they suddenly care about you again?"
He did have a point, but your friends had said that they hadn't been allowed to see you, so it seemed like they had tried at least. "I thought you liked them after meeting them all."
He scoffed. "Initially, yes. But don't you see that they're trying to keep me away from you? I don't know what they're trying to do, but we barely get to see each other. They're not letting you be yourself, and I just want you to realise that."
He was right. Now that you were thinking about it, your friends did always react weirdly when you told them that you were hanging out with Yami. Even though they said they liked him after he had come over for dinner. It didn't make sense. He was also right about the fact that they didn't let you be you. They constantly compared you to who you were before your memory loss and desperately tried to bring those memories back. It was annoying.
"You're right, Yami," you said. "Thanks for opening my eyes. I promise I won't hang out with Eiji anymore and I'll make more time for you. I want you to know that I'm taking this relationship seriously, okay?"
He sighed deeply. "Thanks, (y/n). I'm just trying to look out for you because I care about you so much. I don't want people to take advantage of you just because you're such a nice person"
You smiled softly. "I appreciate that, Yami. I'm sorry for upsetting you."
"Don't be sorry, it's okay now. I just wanted to be open about my feelings." Yami sounded way calmer already, and you were glad that you were able to get through this tense situation.
You stayed quiet for a moment, contemplating what to say. But Yami was first to break the silence. "Any idea what you would like to do on the weekend? I'll treat you to anything you want" His cheerful voice made your heart beat faster. Before you knew it, you were chatting as though what you had spoken about earlier had never happened.
On the opposite side of the dorms, the mood wasn't as lighthearted. Katsuki was laying in his room, staring at the ceiling. It felt like that was the only thing he would ever do lately. Lying on his bed, staring into nothingness, because that's all that he had left.
He tried to picture you next to him, tried to imagine you holding his hand, but it didn't feel the same. It was just in his head, and you had slipped away. Your voice and love made even the darkest moments shine bright like the sun, but your light was gone, and all that was left was darkness. The silence surrounding him felt so damn cold, and he could feel himself come undone.
You were all he ever wanted, but now he was on his own. You were already so far gone, and he knew that he would never be able to catch up to you. Every day was the same, and he felt like he was trapped in a never-ending night. Everything was so dark, and it was as though the only way for him to get any light was to burn down everything that was in his way. And he could only hope that after all was said and done, the only thing left standing would be you and your love for him.
He scoffed. He really had to get a grip. He decided to go to the training grounds to let off some steam. Maybe that would help clear his head. He quickly changed into his workout clothes and was ready to leave his room in no time. But the moment he opened the door, he saw someone standing on the other side of it. "Shitty hair? What are you doing here?" Katsuki asked his friend.
Eijiro gave him a big smile. "Hey buddy, I was wondering if I could talk to you for a minute."
Katsuki raised his eyebrows. "I was on my way to do some training, so I don't have time." He tried to push himself past his friend, he really didn't feel up for any sort of conversation right now.
But the red-haired boy didn't let him off that easily. "It's important, Katsuki."
The latter stopped in his tracks, Eijiro never called him by his name, always giving him nicknames. Maybe he should listen to him after all. "Fine," Katsuki grunted, letting the other boy into his room.
He motioned Eijiro to sit on his bed, and he sat down on the chair by his desk. "So?" He asked his friend.
Eijiro suddenly didn't know what to say. How was he supposed to approach this? Especially considering he was talking to the most emotionally constipated person he knew. "Dude," he began. "I think you've been doing really bad lately and I want to help you."
Katsuki clicked his tongue. "Tch. That's what you wanted to fucking talk about? I'm fine, how many times do I need to repeat that?"
"Until it's true. Because right now, it isn't. I can see that you're not okay and…" He stopped himself, preparing for the impact. He knew that the moment he would say it out loud, Katsuki would most likely explode on him.
"And what?" Katsuki asked irritated.
Eiji swallowed hard. "And I think I know the reason for why you're doing so bad."
Katsuki's eyes widened. "W-what are you talking about, Shitty Hair?"
"I think that you're in love with (y/n) and I think that she used to be in love with you too. I think that the two of you were dating and now she has forgotten all about it." The moment Eijiro said it out loud, he closed his eyes, half expecting a massive explosion to go off in front of him.
"What the fuck makes you say such a stupid thing?" Katsuki asked, suspiciously calm.
Eiji took a deep breath, glad that he was still alive. "You've changed so much since her accident, and you've become quieter since she's been back… I dunno man, you're just like an empty shell…"
Katsuki rolled his eyes. "Fucking hell. Am I not allowed to be tired? There doesn't have to be a reason behind every fucking thing."
"It's not just that, bro. You visited her in the hospital. Why would you do that?" He knew cornering his friend like that was dangerous, but he had to know the truth. Maybe he could help fix this.
"Fuck, I already told everyone that my grandma was in the hospital. How does that prove anything?" Katsuki didn't know what else to say. What good would it do to confide into Eijiro? He was your best friend too and if he would tell you by accident… Katsuki could only imagine the mess that would cause.
"Your grandma lives in a different city, dude. You might think I’m stupid, but I’m not that dumb.”
Katsuki stayed silent. What was he supposed to say to that? His friend wasn't wrong, after all. "Besides," Eijiro said. "Why else would you know her favourite mochi flavour? You don't particularly care about other people, why would you know something so random about her?"
The blonde clicked his tongue. "Jesus fuck, shitty hair, way to look into things too much. She told me a while ago, and I happened to remember it. No big deal… geez"
Eijiro shook his head. "Dude, I can't help you if you're not honest with me."
"I never said I wanted your help with anything."
The red-haired boy didn't see any other option, he had to play his trump card. "You wrote her a note," he said, making the other boy look at him. "I read it. It's your handwriting."
Judging by Katsuki's face, Eijiro knew that he had cracked him. Surely this must be where the blonde would finally admit to his feelings. But Eiji was wrong. "The fuck you're talking about?"
"Oh my god, Katsuki, will you drop it already? Why can't you admit it? I know it’s your handwriting and I also saw a picture of your hand holding hers. Stop playing dumb already." Eijiro had reached the limit of his patience. Why was Katsuki so stubborn?
"Just to make it clear, you're wrong. But let's say for the sake of the argument, you were right. What good would that knowledge do? She's got a boyfriend. So no matter what you think might have been between us, there is clearly nothing left of it." Katsuki tried hard not to break down. He couldn't break down now. It wasn't that he didn't trust his friend, he just didn't know what Eijiro was planning, and he didn't like not being in control.
Eijiro was at a loss for words. What was he supposed to reply to that? Why did Katsuki not want to admit to it? It didn't make any sense. He was silent for a few minutes, trying to collect his thoughts and find a good argument. But Katsuki was quicker.
"I need to go work out now," Katsuki said, getting up from his chair. "Close the damn door when you leave."
And with that, he left his best friend behind, both of them were extremely emotional. Eijiro just wanted to help his friends. If you had been together, then you should be together again. It wasn't fair that life had ripped you apart. And this weird boyfriend of yours had to disappear too. This was no longer a case of looking out for you, he had to look out for both of you and fix a situation that shouldn't have happened in the first place.
Katsuki, on the other hand, was on the verge of a breakdown. He thought he had removed all traces of your relationship before you had come back into the dorms. How could he have forgotten about that damn note? He could've sworn that he had looked everywhere. Small explosions were already emitting from his palms. He was so angry with himself.
He had tried to hide evidence because he didn't want to upset you. He knew you so well, and he also knew that you would feel terribly guilty if you found out that you had dated and you completely forgot about it. He didn't want your sympathy, and he had been afraid to be treated differently by you. He'd rather have you treat him like an ordinary classmate than a guy you pitied.
He contemplated going back into your room when you were out and looking for the note, taking it away so you would think that it had merely been a dream. But he knew he couldn't do that, it would only make you suspicious. Besides, he had left the spare key, that you had once given to him, in your room where it belonged. He had no right to carry it with him anymore.
At least he was still holding onto the ring that he had gotten you. It was a symbol of his love for you, a promise almost.
He still remembered the day he had given it to you. Thinking back, he was almost able to feel the warm rays of sunshine on his skin. From pretty early on in your relationship, the two of you had made it a tradition to explore nearby parks and forests together. Enjoying the peace and quiet, a total contrast to your daily life at UA. On those days, you would buy different kinds of snacks at the nearest convenience store, and then head out to an area that you hadn't yet explored.
During your first few explorations, you both had been rather quiet, still a little shy around each other. But that quickly changed. You both had so much to talk about, and Katsuki was surprised at how much he actually enjoyed chatting to another person.
You often talked about random things, like heroes that you liked while growing up or your opinions on the latest episode of your favourite tv show. But you also had more serious conversations. About your families and aspirations for your future, for example. He cherished those moments because he felt listened to, probably for the first time in his life.
But above all, what he cherished the most, were the moments in which he could make you laugh. He never thought of himself as a funny guy, but being around you brought out his humorous side. And whenever you rewarded him with your laugh, it was like a blessing.
On the day he had given you the ring, you were exploring an area of the woods that you hadn't been to before. You eventually found a little stream and followed it for a while. In the end, it brought you to this beautiful clearing. Lush grass, wildflowers everywhere. It was breathtaking, and he knew that it was the perfect backdrop for the gift he wanted to give to you.
He was hesitant at first, unsure of whether you would find his gesture weird. So he held off.
But then he looked at you from the side and what he saw was making the butterflies inside of him go crazy. There you were, sitting on the picnic blanket, munching on an Onigiri. You had been holding the food with both of your hands, almost making you look like a squirrel. You were watching your surroundings with big eyes, clearly in awe of the beauty around you.
It was both adorable and beautiful. Katsuki loved that about you. Your ability to be so obliviously cute. Effortlessly graceful, in the most random situations. But he also knew the other side of you. The dorky girl whose laugh was way too loud and who scrunched her nose while giggling; making you snort more often than you'd like to admit.
He loved all of it. All sides of you, and he couldn't wait to discover even more. Just like you were exploring those forests together, he wanted to explore you. The good and the bad. And he knew that you felt the same. You were the one person who accepted all of his sides, and you didn't mind how rough around the edges he was. You stuck with him either way.
Which was why he decided to give you the ring at that moment. A sparkling promise that he would never stop wanting to explore the world with you.
He had been so relieved when you accepted his gift. The surprise on your face was the most genuine thing he had ever seen. You had put it on immediately, making some dumb joke about how it would be difficult to top this scenario for when he would propose to you. He dismissed it then, trying to hide his blush. But deep down, he knew that one day, he would most definitely replace that ring with another.
The photograph Eijiro had talked about had been taken after Katsuki had given you the ring. He wasn't one for pictures, but he allowed you to photograph your hands at least. The look in your eyes had been too breathtaking to say no to anyway.
He sighed at the memory, and when he finally arrived at the training grounds, he was already way too exhausted to train. His mental distress was getting to his physical health, and it pissed him off. He didn't know what he could do about it, though. He slid down on the ground and sat with his back against the wall. He was looking down, his head hanging low and his arms resting on his knees. It almost seemed as though he was trying to fold himself in half, legs pulled towards his torso, trying to make himself as small as he felt.
It was here where he had realised that he was in love with you. For him, it definitely hadn't been love at first sight. His feelings had developed over time, especially after you had started training with each other after school. One day after training it suddenly came to him. Looking at you was different than before. He had a melody in his head when he looked into your eyes that day, and it was the most beautiful harmony he had ever heard.
It was you who had convinced him to finally talk about his feelings, even if it was just with you. Before opening up to you, he had just pushed forward without thinking, blindly striving for something that he didn't even have a clear picture of. He didn't know when his burning passion had developed into something different, something that wasn't him. And he didn't know what had caused the change in him either.
But you did. You knew what had changed Katsuki, and you had helped him work through his issues.
Before he let you into his life, he didn't think he could get better. But you knew that his issues lay in his past. That he felt weak and as though it was him who caused All Might to retire. He felt inferior to everyone who was catching up to him, even if he was still stronger than them. He had the tendency to perpetually doubt himself, but he kept it all bottled up inside of him.
He remembered how you had told him that it was all just in his head, that nobody saw him the way he saw himself. You said that he had to forgive himself before he could move on. He had thought that he was already beyond repair, but you had proven him wrong. You had pulled him out of the hole that he had dug for himself. You taught him how to move forward and learn to let go. And you taught him how to love.
He felt at home with you from the moment you had first kissed. It was this look in your eyes that said you would always be there for him. This look that made him realise that he was no longer alone in this. He knew pretty quickly that he wouldn't be able to take it if you were to ever leave him.
But you did, and he wasn't okay. No matter how much he pretended that he was, he wasn't. It hurt him every second of every hour. Every waking moment and even in his dreams. He wasn't okay.
It wasn't as much in your words as it was in the way you were carrying yourself. The way your eyes sparkled and your lips were constantly curled into a breathtaking smile. An instant giveaway of how happy you were. Katsuki knew that because he knew you. Everything about you. Your deepest secrets, you had shared them all with him. Not too long ago, it had been him that made you shine like that. His love and attention had been what made you as happy as you were at this very moment.
But now, he was only a silent spectator. Sitting on the sidelines, benched for the rest of his life. Or at least for as long as you were with that sleazy idiot that you were calling your boyfriend now. He didn't mean to eavesdrop, but he also didn't make any effort of leaving the room while you were telling your girlfriends all about your newfound relationship. It was tearing him up from the inside, but he couldn't bring himself to leave.
"Spill the beans, (y/n)," Mina said excitedly. "How did he ask you out?"
You grinned. "It was so romantic," you said, purposefully dragging your story out to build suspense. "We went back to this park where he had taken me on our first 'date' after leaving the hospital. Only this time he had prepared a picnic for me."
"So cute," Ochako said in awe, having the other girls nod in agreement.
"Well, we were sitting on this blanket, surrounded by trees and wildflowers. Then Yami suddenly started talking about how he couldn't stop thinking about me ever since he first laid eyes on me." You couldn't help but blush while recalling the memory. "He said he knows that we have only known each other for a few months, but that those months were enough for him to fall in love with me."
The girls around you started squealing, clearly enjoying the romantic words that Yami had said to you. "So then he asked me whether I feel the same and if I would do him the honour of being his girlfriend."
By now, you were beet red, and your friends were almost on the edge of their seats. "You really lucked out with this one, (y/n)," Toru said giggling.
You shrugged your shoulders. "I guess after the accident and losing my memories, I did deserve some sort of reward."
A collective giggle went through the room, and Katsuki wanted to die. He was just about to leave when you spoke up again. "I still can't believe that I finally have a boyfriend. I finally get to experience all my firsts an-"
The faint sound of a tiny explosion made you stop. What was that? You looked to the side and saw Katsuki walking out of the room. Had he been here the entire time? Did he cause the explosion? He looked upset, and his palms were sparking, you couldn't help but wonder if he was okay. Maybe his grandma was in the hospital again?
"Bakugou," you said, making him stop. "Are you okay?"
No. He wasn't okay. You were talking about all these firsts you would share with this guy that wasn't him when in reality, you had already experienced all of these things. With Katsuki. He was your first kiss. Your first boyfriend. Your first time. It was all him, but you didn't remember, so no, he wasn't okay. Not even in the slightest.
He huffed. "What's it to you?" Was all he said before hurrying off.
You looked at your friends. "What the hell is wrong with him lately?" Mina asked, receiving nothing but shrugs in return.
Katsuki couldn't do this much longer, so he fled into his room. The moment the door closed behind him, the dam in his eyes broke once again. Fuck. His girlfriend was now in a relationship with another guy. You officially chose to be with someone else, and he had to accept that. He was like a ghost in your eyes, and he had to be okay with that. He was merely a shadow lurking around corners, watching you and hoping you would someday recognise him for who he really was and for who you had loved.
His head was filled with nothing but you. Only the amount of stars in the sky could compare to the number of thoughts he had of you. And while for him there was nothing there but you, he couldn't help but wonder if he ever as much as crossed your mind. He wanted to know so desperately, but at the same time, he knew that he wouldn't like the answer, so part of him never wanted to find out.
He felt like he was chasing a love that could never be his again. No matter how much he pretended that everything was okay, that you were still his, he knew that it wasn't the truth and that all that was left was the emptiness inside of him. Maybe one day you would realise just how much he loved you and you would remember that you loved him too.
But what if you wouldn't? What if your stars would never align again, your hearts never beat in sync again? What if he would never be able to make you his again? He had surrendered his heart to you a long time ago, and he wasn't planning on taking it back. He could only hope that one day you would pick it up again and heal it from the relentless torture it had been going through ever since he lost you.
When you eventually walked back into your room, your thoughts wandered to your blonde classmate. You were still annoyed with him about how uncalled for his attitude towards Yami was, but at the same time, you couldn't help but worry. You weren't very close to him, but even you could tell that something wasn't right with him.
You thought about what happened at the dinner with Yami and how Katsuki knew about your dislike for matcha desserts and your favourite mochi. You must have told him about this sometime during the year that you couldn't remember. Maybe you had been better friends than you had thought, but you had asked him, and he denied it. You had also asked your friends, but they too couldn't recall a friendship between you and the explosive boy.
You sighed, there was no use in thinking about this. If Katsuki didn't want to talk about it, then there was no way for you to find out. But the moment you stepped into your room, you had an idea. Maybe there was some sort of clue somewhere in your belongings that could give you an idea of whether you had been friends or not. And if it didn't, maybe you could at least find some other things in your belongings that might jog your memory. You hadn't thoroughly looked through your stuff since coming back, most likely to avoid confronting the fact that you had forgotten so many important memories. Still, you knew that you had to face these things eventually.
No matter how often you repeated that you didn't care about losing your memories, deep down, you did want to remember. And even if it was just for the sake of remembering what you had learned in school. You were so far behind your classmates, and at this rate, you weren't sure whether you would be able to graduate.
You tried to put that thought aside and started rummaging through every corner of your room. As expected, you didn't find a single shred of evidence that would suggest you had ever been friends with Katsuki. You weren't all that surprised, but for some reason, part of you was upset. You didn't quite understand why you felt that way, it wasn't like you cared about him after all.
You continued looking through your room until you found a small red box that was tucked into a corner under your bed. You pulled it out and inspected it curiously. It was very obviously a jewellery box, but you couldn't recall ever having seen it. Carefully, you opened it and were surprised to find that there was no piece of jewellery inside. Instead, there was a single piece of paper, neatly folded sitting on the velvety cushion inside the box.
Your heart started beating a little faster. You had no idea what it could be, but you had a feeling that it was something significant. Hastily you unfolded the paper, revealing a note written in messy handwriting. Your eyes opened wide, not able to hide the shock you felt the moment you read those lines.
(Y/N),
We need to talk.
I think you already have an idea of what it is that I want to tell you.
If you feel the same, meet me at the usual spot at seven pm tonight.
You read the note over and over again, but no matter how often you repeated it, it just wouldn't make any sense to you. Whoever had written this didn't sign the note. It seemed as though you had once known who this person was without them having to write it down. You tried to recognise the handwriting, but you couldn't think of a match.
Who was this person? A friend? A classmate? Someone that you had forgotten altogether? And what was your relationship with them? You couldn't help but blush when the words suddenly hit you.
“If you feel the same.”
Was this a confession letter? It sure as hell didn't resemble what you would expect one to look like, but then again, you didn't have anything to compare it to. And the even bigger question: Did you feel the same? Had you met this person that night? Had there been someone that you had been in love with? You shook your head. No, Mina had told you that there hadn't been anyone.
But what if you simply chose not to tell her?
This was too much for you, and you decided to put the note back to where you had found it. But the moment you wanted to place the note back inside the box, you saw that there was something else tucked away in the little crevice that usually held rings inside of boxes like this one. You swallowed hard and contemplated whether you should look at it or not. Your curiosity won, and you fished the paper out of its hiding place.
The paper was a little thicker, and you realised pretty quickly that it was a photograph. You unfolded it, and the confusion inside of you mixed with a sickening feeling that you couldn't describe. "What the hell is going on?" You whispered, unable to look away from the small photo in your hands.
You turned the picture around and saw a little note in the corner. The word 'forever' was neatly written on the paper, and you immediately knew that it was your handwriting. You had written a date beneath it. It dated back to pretty much exactly one year ago. You assumed that it was the day this picture had been taken.
You swallowed away the tears that threatened to leave your eyes and turned the picture around again. You stared at it for what felt like hours, trying to make sense of it. The photo showed your ha-
Loud knocking on your door made you look up from the picture, hastily folding it back up and shoving it into the little box. The knocking repeated. "One second, I'm coming," you shouted, placing the box under your pillow, making sure it was hidden away.
The moment you opened the door, you looked into the smiling face of your best friend. "Eji!" You said surprised. "What are you doing here?"
He shrugged his shoulders. "Just wanted to see how my favourite little bean is doing."
You started laughing. Eiji had called you his little bean ever since you were kids. You had no idea why, but you never bothered asking either. In fact, you quite liked that he had a unique name just for you. With a big smile you motioned him to come inside, it felt like you hadn't hung out in ages and it was long overdue.
You were sitting on your bed, and for some reason, it felt awkward. It was pretty apparent that there were questions in the room that desperately needed to be answered, but neither of you knew how to start. Eiji sighed.
"So… is it official yet?" He asked you, earning a confused look from you. "You and that guy, Yami… Are you officially going out?"
You smiled softly and nodded. "Yeah, he asked me out." You were beaming, and he noticed how radiant you were. "And I said yes."
He smiled at you, trying to be supportive but failing. "What's up?" You asked him.
"I don't know," he admitted. "It's just that… You know I'm really protective of you, and I don't want you to get hurt."
You placed your hand on his thigh. "Aw Eiji, don't you worry. Yami is a great guy, he'd never hurt me."
"It's just that…" He scratched his head. "Ah, never mind."
You clicked your tongue. "You can't do that! You can't say something like that and make me all intrigued and then just let me down. Tell me!" You pouted. "Please"
He seemed to contemplate for a moment. "Fine," he eventually said. "I'm afraid that his strong personality will overpower yours. I can see how your everything revolves around him, and I don't want you to lose yourself."
You didn't quite know whether you should be offended or not. Of course, you wouldn't lose yourself. You wanted to snap at him, but something inside of you stopped you from doing so. You knew that he was just trying to look out for you. Maybe you should just let it slide. "I appreciate your concern, Eiji. But I'm old enough to make my own decisions."
Ouch. That came out way harsher than you had intended. You could see him swallow hard, afraid that he might have made you mad. You quickly tried to change the topic, knowing that keeping this up wouldn't do any good.
"So," you suddenly said. "I would like to ask you something."
Eiji tilted his head a little, looking at you with curiosity.
"Have I…" You started blushing and cleared your throat. "Did I have a boyfriend before I got caught in the accident?"
He looked surprised by your question, and it took him a moment to reply. "Well… You were very secretive about it, I think I was the only one you told… But yes, there was someone."
You swallowed hard. You had already expected this, but it was shocking you nonetheless. "D-do you know who it was?"
He shook his head. "No clue. I was bugging you about it for weeks, but you wouldn't say a word. You really enjoyed teasing me," he pouted a little.
Your mind was racing. You were teasing him about it… Does that mean that the person you were dating was someone that he knew? Why else would you keep it a secret? Did you keep this from everyone? You glanced towards your pillow, contemplating whether you should show the note and picture to your best friend. Maybe he could identify the handwriting.
"Hey, Eiji… I found this note," you said, climbing over him a little to reach under your pillow. You pulled the box out and held it in front of you. You were both looking at it in silence. "I found this under my bed and it must have been pretty important to me… Judging by how much I was hiding it. But I can't make sense of this. Do you mind having a look?"
"Yeah, of course, anything for you," he said, smiling.
You quickly unfolded the note and handed it to him. "What do you th-"
You were interrupted by the ringing of your phone. "Oh shoot, hang on, Yami is calling." But your friend didn't hear you. His brain was working at a hundred miles per hour. You, however, were too preoccupied with your boyfriend to notice this.
"What are you up to? Wanna meet up?" Yami asked from the other end of the phone.
You sighed apologetically. "Sorry, but I'm hanging out with Eiji today," you explained.
Silence.
"Yami?"
You could hear him clear his throat. "I see. Call me when you're done with whatever it is the two of you are doing."
What was he implying? "Yami, wait…" But he had already hung up.
Odd. Maybe he had had a bad day. You decided to ignore it for now and instead, see whether Eiji had any idea of who could have written that note.
"What do you think?" You asked him, seemingly ripping him out of deep thoughts.
He looked at you in confusion. "Huh?"
"The note," you said. "Any idea who could have written it?"
Eijiro was a lousy liar, but he had to try. "Nope, not a clue."
"I thought as much," you said, hesitating for a moment. "There's also this picture."
You took the photo out of the box, carefully unfolded it and moved closer to Eiji, now sitting right beside him so that you could look at the picture together. It was completely silent in the room as you both studied the picture. You were looking for clues, but for Eijiro it just confirmed what he had already suspected.
The picture showed two intertwined hands that were resting on lush green grass which was decorated with colourful wildflowers. One of the hands was significantly larger and held the smaller one tightly. There was no way of telling who these hands belonged to - except there was. For Eijiro, it was more than evident that the small hand belonged to his childhood friend, he had held it so often over the years. He also recognised the calloused skin on the other hand, a hand that had defeated him during training countless times.
You didn't notice the uneasiness that spread through Eiji's body. "I don't know what to make of this," you said. "I'm a hundred percent sure that this is my hand in the picture. I just… I have no clue who the other person could be." You sighed deeply. "Also can you see the ring I'm wearing? I've never seen it before, and it wasn't in my personal belongings in the hospital either."
You rambled on, but Eiji didn't hear any of it. His mind was somewhere else entirely. "Eiji? Are you listening?" You shook him a little when he didn't react.
He snapped out of it and looked at you. "Eh, yeah sorry," he said. "I'm just trying to think of who it could be"
You nodded. "Me too. I do have a theory, though."
"Oh yeah?" His head shot up from the photo immediately, and he looked at you full of expectations.
"Oh wow, someone's suddenly very interested," you laughed.
He scratched his head. "Well, yeah… Getting closer to the truth would be amazing."
You giggled. "Okay, right. Here we go," you said, moving to sit in front of him. You both had your legs crossed, and you placed your hands on him, looking into his eyes because you didn't want to miss his reaction. "What if… what if it was Yami?"
Eijiro couldn't hide his genuine surprise. "Say what?"
You started giggling. "Well, the place in the picture looks exactly like the place Yami took me to when he asked me out," you said. "Also when we got there, I had this Deja Vu, it just felt as though I had been there before." You couldn't contain your excitement. What if your connection to Yami was so strong that your feelings returned even though you lost your memories? It would certainly explain why you felt so comfortable around him from the very beginning.
Eijiro looked at you in disbelief. "That is one hell of a theory."
"I know, right?! How romantic would that be?" Your face literally beamed.
He sighed deeply. "Well yeah, I guess so… But (y/n) you know that's pretty much out of the question right?"
"No. Why do you think that?" You asked. "Maybe he was the one who gave me that ring, and he took it while I was in the hospital so that he can give it back to me one day."
Eijiro couldn't help but chuckle a little which irritated you, to say the least. "I'm sorry but…" He paused for a moment to regain his composure. "Look (y/n), I get it, you want to know who this person is and I get that it would be easiest if the person was the same guy that you're dating now, but you have to agree that it's pretty much impossible. I mean… He was in the hospital too. How much of a coincidence would it be that he too had an accident at the same time? And I highly doubt that he staged his accident just so he could meet you in the hospital. He couldn't even have known that you lost your memories when he was admitted to the hospital."
You stayed silent for a moment. Eijiro was right. You mentally slapped yourself. Why did you even think that could be the case? It didn't make any sense. "You're right. I'm sorry, Eiji." You looked down at the picture in your hand and looked pretty defeated.
"Hey now, little bean, you don't have to be sorry, okay?" He said, trying to get you to look at him. "I understand that you're upset and that you want answers and I promise you that I will help find those answers. So cheer up please!"
He gave you his signature smile, and you couldn't help but smile back. "You're the best Eiji. Thank you!" You tackled him and hugged him tightly. He just laughed and patted your back.
After a while, you let go of him and looked at him with a grin. "What?" He asked suspiciously. "That face tells me that you're up to something."
You started laughing. "I just feel like we talked enough about me," you said, smirking. "Now tell me… How're things with Mina?" You wiggled your eyebrows as best as you could. Making your best friend snort.
"You look so dumb," he laughed, trying to avoid the topic.
You started pouting. "Come ooooooon! Spill the beans."
"Stop begging, geez…" He said with an adorable blush on his face. "Nothing has happened yet. I'm starting to believe she's not into me."
You shook your head so hard that it almost fell off your shoulders. "Hell no! She's totally crazy about you. You just gotta make the first move."
He sighed dramatically and let himself fall on his back, staring at the ceiling. "Well, we were talking about going on a camping trip as long as the weather is still nice. Maybe I can try my luck then."
You popped your head above him, looking down at him. "Grow some balls, Eiji."
"Take that back!" He said. "I'm super manly okay?!" He started tickling you, and soon enough, you were both out of breath. You were just about to say something when your phone vibrated. It was a text message from Yami.
"Are you still with him?" You read it out loud and sighed.
Eiji sat back up and gave you a weak smile. "Seems like your boyfriend isn't too happy about us hanging out."
"I think he's just had a bad day. Nevermind him," you reassured your friend.
But the red-haired boy got up from your bed. "No, it's fine (y/n)," he said. "I need to go somewhere anyway. You should give him a call and see how he's doing."
You gave him an apologetic smile. "Thanks, Eiji."
"Don't mention it." And with that, he was out of the door.
You quickly dialled your boyfriend's number, and Eiji almost sprinted to someone else's dorm room.
