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@keepers-guild
Complaints Desk open!
hi this is an RP blog based on the Keepers Guild from drawtectives midnight alley. i thought it might be fun to have a tumblr blog where people can send complaints through asks to mimic the complaint desk in the show. intended for silly stuff and in universe stuff along the lines of the ones that were in the show
why don’t we just call it table pong……
Complaint: Why don't we just call it table pong
By: Anonymous
Location: Undetermined
Logged: Yes
Resolved: Yes
Notes: Proposed the idea to both the Ping Pong Society and the Table Tennis Society using the newly installed ENotes system.
anybody want this highly venomous gecko? he’s been my best friend for 15 years but i can’t take care of him anymore due to recently developing an allergy to poison. he’s right here in my briefcase— oh no. uh. nevermind. i guess he left
Complaint: Giving away highly venomous gecko
By: Anonymous
Location: Undetermined
Logged: Yes
Resolved: Yes
Notes: Contacted E.E.T.F.R.O.G. to ask if they know an equivalent group for highly venomous geckos. Sent H.V.G.R.O.G. (Highly Venomous Geckos Rescue Organisation Group) to search for the highly venomous gecko.
there is a bowling ball in my apartment. I’m not entirely certain as to how it got here, but the sound of children and cheering outside makes me suspicious. I think we have a rogue bowler on our hands, and I demand justice.
Complaint: Rogue bowler
By: Anonymous
Location: "my apartment"
Logged: Yes
Resolved: No
Notes: Contacted the Thunder Bowler Society to ask about the subject. Havent recieved an answer yet. Nobody has been able to contact them since last week.
is the keeper’s guild taking applications? i tried applying to be a drawtective but apparently they “have enough boyfriends”. not sure if that was a joke or not. i wasn’t applying to be a boyfriend. could i be a keeper’s guild boyfriend? is that an option? i’d settle for mopping.
theres no keepers guild boyfriend option but we are accepting volunteers, paid interns and part timers due to many of the staff going missing. we could use a mopper, actually. uh, not sure how you sign up, im a volunteer so i just showed up. maybe go talk to whoevers working the front desk now.
i can’t believe people are still stanning eugene finch after what he did. i SAW him throw a bowling ball at children arranged in a triangle. he didn’t even get them all at once he had to try again and get a spare. and people honestly support him?? just because he’s super hot and can talk to ghosts??? why is no one talking about this? just because it happened in my dream? that makes me a FIRSTHAND WITNESS
Complaint: People supporting Eugene
By: Anonymous
Location: Undetermined
Logged: Yes
Resolved: Yes
Notes: He can do wrong. Besides, even if he did do what you say, I would forgive him. Im so proud he got the spare! Last week I saw him at the Thunder Bowler Society and his first ball didnt even reach the pins. It took him so many tries that eventually they gave him an extra round for free. He's already grown so much...
-Eugene's #7526831 fan
Hey this is Devon, yknow, the person who owns Devon's a-Leavened, the bakery/coffee shop that opened last year. Just wanted to say, hey, Clarice, your order's ready.
Also bogo on sourdough this week. So, come on by, everyone!
DEVON OUT!
Complaint: Clarice's order ready
By: Devon
Location: Devon's a-Leavened
Logged: Yes
Resolved: Yes
Notes: No action required, as determined by staff.
CRIMINALIZE ROAD SOUP. this message was paid for by the midnight alley bowl lovers association (MABLA)
Complaint: Criminalize road soup
By: the Midnight Alley Bowl Lovers Association (MABLA)
Location: Undetermined
Logged: Yes
Resolved: Yes
Notes: You know what, Im starting to think road soup should stay legal. Why should we not eat the soup just because its on the road? Im gonna send a note using the recently installed ENotes system that says "SOUP BELONGS ON THE ROAD" and nobody in this guild can stop me!
-the road soup loving intern
We have banned this intern from using the recently installed ENotes system due to encouraging dangerous and wasteful behavior. Sending a note that says "Soup does not belong on the road" to everyone in the alley. While its legal to eat road soup due to it being a personal choice that only harms yourself, it is not recommended.
hey can you ask the one with the pointy hat at the guilt how many rats fit in there. I, I need to know for personal purposes.
I was gonna ask her (I assumed you're talking about Fleur) but I saw the hat laying here at the desk so I ran a little experiment. After placing some peanut butter inside the hat and placing it outside, I determined about 2 and a half rats fit inside at once! I hope Fleur doesnt notice I borrowed the hat.
CRIMINALIZE ROAD SOUP. this message was paid for by the midnight alley bowl lovers association (MABLA)
Complaint: Criminalize road soup
By: the Midnight Alley Bowl Lovers Association (MABLA)
Location: Undetermined
Logged: Yes
Resolved: Yes
Notes: You know what, Im starting to think road soup should stay legal. Why should we not eat the soup just because its on the road? Im gonna send a note using the recently installed ENotes system that says "SOUP BELONGS ON THE ROAD" and nobody in this guild can stop me!
-the road soup loving intern
Hey why do i have to have a chart. There didnt used to be a chart slot. What am i supposed to put in here i dont have a chart. Look. Okay. I love the keepers guild, but this is clearly a power grab by the chartmakers guild and as a card carrying member if the graph enthusiast club i WONT STAND FOR IT! stop showing favoritism and either remove the chart slot or add a graph slot.
Anyway, i punched a lamp post and it broke can you fix it
Complaint: Chart slot
By: Anonymous
Location: Undetermined
Logged: Yes
Resolved:
Notes: The chart slot is optional. A new graph slot will be installed tomorrow. Sent two employees to fix the lamp post and place a sign on it that says "please dont punch me :(".
Hey so I just hired a mouse to work at my bakery, and he asked for a cookie, which sure fine I allow my employees to sample the baked goods (so they can tell everyone how good they are) but now he's asking for a bunch of other stuff? Like napkins and milk and healthcare? Im just not sure what to do cause I feel like if i give in to more of his demands he's just gonna keep demanding stuff of me and soon im gonna run out of cookies
Complaint: Gave a mouse a cookie
By: Anonymous
Location: "my bakery"
Logged: Yes
Resolved: Yes
Notes: You have to give the mouse napkins and milk and healthcare, its union mandated.
Hey, uhm, I know this is the Keeper's Guild, but like, I think that learning to throw stuff away to make space in our lives is, like, super important? And I just think that your guild is like, really exclusionary for those of us who are passionate about getting rid of things. And DON'T tell me to join the Barie Bondo Method Fan Club, I'm SICK and TIRED of people saying I should be grateful for the objects in my life. Everyone just wants to shame me for creating waste by discarding perfectly functional stuff to justify buying new things and I, frankly, think they're being extremely harsh and judgemental. Honestly, if you don't rename the Keeper's Guild to create a more welcoming space for the trash-creating community then I will... uh....well, I can't think of a good threat right now, but.... UGH! You'll be sorry!
Complaint: Keeper's Guild's name
By: Anonymous
Location: Undetermined
Logged: Yes
Resolved: Yes
Notes: No action required, as determined by Keeper's Guild staff.
i want to visit midnight alley but i’m scared of the dark. fix it?
Complaint: Scared of the dark
By: does-this-look-inanimate-to-you
Location: Undetermined
Logged: Yes
Resolved: Yes
Notes: No action required, as determined by staff.
Hey ive noticed there's a kind of thrumming bass emanating from that closed building. You know the one. I spoke with its proprietors and they said it was sometimes used as a dance club which does not explain the fish. I think it may be haunted by one giant fish. Please get some ghost hunters out here. I want the fish and myself to be at peace.
Complaint: Giant fish haunting closed building
By: Anonymous
Location: Undetermined
Logged: Yes
Resolved: Yes
Notes: Sent the Phantom Fighters and Eugene Finch to figure this out.
wait is this not a bowling alley?
No, Midnight Alley is not a bowling alley, its a section of Spire City. We do have bowling alleys in the alley however. You can ask the Thunder Bowler Society for more information.
beautiful man who steals time here. you’ll never catch me ❤️
Please you have to stop. I've been by the complaint desk since last morning it is now 4 am. How does your beautiful powers work when I can't even see you. Ugh your voice is just too dang beautiful! How am I supposed to work like this?? Agh dang now its 1 pm!!! Im just a volunteer please spare me!