Hi sir.
We meet again.
I see your loneliness.
Only this time, I don’t feel it.
The weird parallel of life has been met for me. Does this make me old or wise? Must I be old to be wise?
Years ago, I used to spend my hours in the dark. I spent every second wishing for the next to end.
I used to hurt. In ways the dictionary couldn’t describe and in ways your naive eyes could never see.
Those days are long past. BUT..
Today I see and hold pain in areas of me. It lingers in me, but no longer controls me.
I never thanked God for the sorrow I weeped day after day for years to count.
I do now.
Though I still find myself on pain street I don’t stay long. I am able to recognize and protect myself.
I guess that’s what God planned for so long.
Who would’ve thunk, huh?
That my weary mind would one day realize that the world is ugly & impure but my pain is my navigator. When the path becomes wrong I am able to steer correct once again. I am able to see where the devil settles in people and places. I am able to step on demons effortlessly w every trail I blaze.
You see... it’s hard to see when you’re only thought is to breathe when you find that it’s almost unbearable to do so. But what is seen now is the sphere that many can’t say they hold. I can see that you’re gonna hurt me before you can. I will never know when, because that’s playing God’s vice, but I do know you will. What I do with that knowledge can make my days harder or easier. Because I am just a mere vessel I many times lose this sight and chose dumbly. But, I can still own this power.
So friend,
hear me when I say this.
These hallow days will soon hold life.
These sinking waters will soon turn to shallow grazes.
The dark leaves.
Does your discernment of this earth and the souls walking it change? Yes.
Do joyous moments fall conditional? Yes.
But does the lack of naivety mean all things understood aren’t real?
Never.
My friend, sacrifices are made to gain more. The world is a give take pendulum. But this knowledge is a vice worth change.
Trust me.
You’ll thank this you, years from now.
You’ll be happy you met him, after all.
— jayt. Feb. 4 2019 2:39am
