the winner takes it all
building me a home, thinking I’d be strong there but I was a fool, playing by the rules
pairing: ex bf!toji x reader x ex fwb!sukuna
summary: toji was your high school sweetheart, the love of your life, and despite all of your ups and downs you always thought you'd end up together in the end
but when everything comes crashing down you find unlikely comfort in the form of your ex-friend with benefits
word count: 3.5k
content: 18+ mdni, smut, cheating, angst, cucking, piv, revenge sex, exhibitionism (i guess), toji is a JERK
a/n: sukuna fans you guys stay winning in this one (as always), toji fans uhhh good luck unless you love angst and seeing your man get cucked
wrote this one for the jjk vs the world collab event for @spearofheaven! congrats again daya on 1k followers ily!! I had so much fun taking part in this and you should all go and check out all the other fics in the collab <3
It had started with a high school romance.
Something cliche - the bad boy falling in love with the nice girl, taking her out on dates to drive-ins, sneaking in through her window when her parents weren’t around, softening his hardened edges only for her.
Your romance had been the plotline of teen movies, of the cute little books that you read in your free time. Back then it had felt like you’d hit the jackpot, like your love for Toji was something that would last forever.
At eighteen you’d imagined that the two of you would get married in a few years - buy a nice house and have a couple of kids. It had seemed like a given that the two of you would stay together forever, have a happy ending like in all of those movies and books.
But the illusion came crumbling down when the two of you graduated.
You were both heading off to different colleges, and even though you and Toji had talked extensively about being long distance and how you could drive out to visit each other frequently, it seemed that once the day actually came his opinion changed.
He asked to go on a break, telling you that he didn’t want to miss out on the college experience just because he was in a relationship. You knew that was just code for him wanting to fuck other women, but you were so smitten with him at the time that you agreed to just going on a break rather than breaking up.
So as the two of you went your separate ways, you stayed loyal to him throughout your first year at college, trying not to let your negative feelings get the better of you each weekend as you’d watch his instagram story of him grinding up against some hot girl in a club.
It was just a break. You’d agreed to this. He’d come back to you when it was time.
And occasionally he did come to you, calling you late at night and telling you that he missed you, getting you to send him sexy videos of yourself so he had something to jerk off to. A few times he even came to visit, fucking you so hard into your dorm bed that you forgot about how much the current situation was upsetting you, too smitten with the man that you’d been in love with since you were sixteen.
That was before Sukuna showed up.
You met him at a party in your second year of college, a gathering that your friend had dragged you to in an attempt to keep you from lamenting over Toji in your room. She’d reminded you that if he was out doing whatever he wanted, you should be doing the same.
Guilt had eaten at you as you’d let tattooed hands drag you into an empty room, alcohol numbing your mind as rough lips pressed against yours, your fingers tangling into soft pink locks of hair that certainly weren’t your boyfriend’s. But you didn’t stop him, didn’t pull away when he pushed you down onto his bed and settled himself between your thighs, lapping at your pussy until you were seeing stars and almost forgetting all about Toji.
You’d cried in your dorm room later that night, regret pooling in your stomach at the sight of several missed calls from your boyfriend, dozens of texts demanding to know where you’d been. You’d lied of course, telling him that you’d just fallen asleep - even if he was out there sleeping with other people, for some reason it felt wrong for you to do it too.
But the guilt didn’t stop you from doing it again.
Seeking out Sukuna at parties, always jumping at the chance to see him when he’d drop you a text. You spent half of that year pressed down into his sheets while he fucked you so well that you could barely remember your own name. His hands became more familiar to you than Toji’s, his lips warm and comforting.
It wasn’t a relationship, all the two of you ever did was fuck. No feelings involved. He wasn’t the type of guy who did relationships, and you’d made it very clear that this was temporary, just something to pass the time while you and your boyfriend were apart and free to explore other things.
He never questioned it, never tried to push you into something else - not even when you fell asleep in his arms one night after fucking, waking up the next morning with your bodies tangled a little more intimately than either of you should’ve been comfortable with.
You tried not to think too much about how warm he’d felt with his arms wrapped so tightly around you.
Keeping your distance was important, catching feelings was wrong - a total betrayal to Toji. Sex was one thing, but anything else was completely off the table, and after that night you made sure to always leave Sukuna’s place as soon as you were done. This arrangement was strictly friends with benefits after all.
And it was fun.
Sukuna taught you things that you’d never tried with Toji, always keen to try new positions, talented at making you feel good in ways that you didn’t know were possible. You’d wondered if Toji was gaining similar experience during this time apart - perhaps at the end of this you’d get back together and your sex life would be better than it was before.
Unfortunately, you were given the answer to that question a little sooner than you would’ve liked when Toji showed up at your dorm unannounced at the end of your second year at college.
You and Sukuna had been hanging out in your room. He’d come round to watch a new horror movie that he wanted to show you, and despite your attempts to keep things strictly about sex he’d reminded you that you were friends with benefits, and friends were allowed to hang out together.
Although, most friends probably wouldn’t huddle beneath a blanket together with their hands tightly clasped. At least from Toji’s perspective, your position certainly didn’t look like friendship when he barged into your dorm room that night.
He was quick to make Sukuna hit the road. Your tattooed fuck-buddy had tried to protest, had asked Toji why the fuck he thought he had the right to kick Sukuna out when he couldn’t even treat his girl right. You’d stepped in before things got messy, fully aware that neither man was the type to shy away from a fight.
It had hurt to tell Sukuna to leave, the pain far more intense than it should’ve been considering that he was just someone you were fucking. But you had no choice in the matter, Toji was still your boyfriend and considering the rage clearly simmering below the surface you needed Sukuna to get as far away as possible.
That was the last time you properly saw him.
You ran into him on campus a handful of times in your third year, but you both avoided each other, your last real contact being a text that Toji had ordered you to send, telling Sukuna in no uncertain terms that you didn’t want to see him ever again.
It wasn’t the truth, but Toji had made it clear that night that your break was over. He’d needed some distance to gain a bit of perspective, and seeing you with another guy had been enough to remind him just what he was missing. It made sense, the break was always temporary - at some point you were going to find your way back to each other.
He was the love of your life after all.
Sukuna was nothing - just someone that you used to pass the time, completely insignificant.
Even if your heart did ache every time you thought about his hand clasped in yours beneath that blanket.
Things with Toji were good for a while. He’d call you every night while you were long distance, send you good morning texts, drive over to visit every weekend. It was sweet how the two of you were able to fall back into old patterns, as if the break had never happened. The instagram stories of him in clubs with girls ceased, and you were confident in that final year apart that he remained faithful to you.
You remained faithful to him too.
The two of you moved in together after college, relocating to the nearest city and getting a nice apartment together, decorating it so that it felt like a home to the both of you. And for that first year of living together it felt like you were in heaven.
It was all you’d ever wanted. Waking up next to Toji each day, spending your weekends going out on dates and adventures, spending your nights with him buried inside you and murmuring about just how much he loved you. The two of you had even started to discuss getting married and having kids.
Your great love story was back on track.
The break in college was nothing more than a blip, a hardship that the two of you needed to encounter to grow your appreciation for each other. Something that just strengthened your relationship with each other.
That was what you had truly believed, until one day you returned home early from work to find Toji fucking some girl on the couch. Your couch, the one that the two of you had picked out together.
The worst part was that he hadn’t even tried to apologise. You’d walked through that door to the sight of a random girl bouncing on his cock, and all your boyfriend had managed to say was: “I thought you wouldn’t be home until six?”
A whole screaming match had taken place that evening. The girl had scurried out quickly after your appearance and you and Toji had gone at it for hours, with you asking how he could betray you like that and him trying to put all the blame on you. He claimed that you didn’t put out enough, that you were always too busy working and were neglecting his needs.
Considering that the two of you had sex most nights in a week you couldn’t fathom his argument for a second.
You’d asked him if this was the first time he’d done something like this, desperate to find out if there was some slim chance that your relationship could be saved. Perhaps this was just a temporary lapse in judgement, something that could be worked through and forgiven.
But the look on Toji’s face said it all. This wasn’t the first time and it wouldn’t be the last either.
How could you have been so stupid? All this time you’d been seeing your life as a fairy tale while your boyfriend fucked any girl he wanted. Hell, he was probably still fucking girls back in your third year of college once you’d officially got back together.
He’d likely only ended your break because he couldn’t stand the idea of you fucking someone else, not because he was tired of sleeping with other women.
Enough was enough.
You’d asked him to leave the apartment only for him to boldly remind you that your names were both on the lease and he wouldn’t be going anywhere. And that left the two of you in a stalemate, because you didn’t have anywhere else to go. Your parents had moved across the country, and your job was here - you had no choice but to remain in this house until you found somewhere else to live.
And it was awful. Toji made sure of that.
He was no longer subtle about his affairs, openly fucking that girl that you’d caught him with the other day, making her scream in the bedroom that the two of you used to share while you’d lie on the couch with a pillow pressed up against your ear desperately applying to rental properties.
You weren’t sure how that girl couldn’t feel ashamed of herself, how she had the audacity to return here after finding out that she was having sex with a taken man. It was a little embarrassing for her, and if she really believed that Toji wouldn’t turn around and cheat on her one day she was a fool. Just like you’d been a fool.
And Toji clearly thought that you were still a fool because on evenings that he didn’t have his new woman around he’d sidle up to you and try to win you over with some sweet talk, reminding you of the good times you’d spent together and asking if you really wanted to throw everything away, suggesting that you could try an open relationship, claiming that he didn’t want to live without you.
One night you even let him fuck you again, right there on the couch where you’d caught him. It had been a moment of weakness from your side - he’d got you too caught up in good memories and you’d realised just how great the weight of leaving him felt. He’d murmured about how good you felt as he sunk into you, telling you how much better your pussy felt than any other girl.
That had humiliation coiling in your stomach, because he shouldn’t know what any other girl felt like.
And you’d scuttled away from him quickly once he’d cum, ashamed that you were so weak to still let him control you like this. It was embarrassing that despite everything you still loved him, still believed somewhere in your delusional mind that you could fix things.
But one night when he had his other girl over you could hear him feeding the same stupid, empty words to her, and you understood for the first time that nothing Toji ever did or said had any weight.
More and more of your time was spent out of the house. Knowing that the easiest way to endure this torture while you searched for a new place was to be in the building as infrequently as possible. You’d go to work early and stay late, on weekends you’d spend hours at cafes, shopping malls or in the gym, wanting to be anywhere but your shared home with Toji.
It was one of those weekends spent in the gym that you ran into a familiar face.
He looked a little older now, more mature but no less handsome. He had more tattoos than he did when you knew him in college, and his pink hair had grown longer. You couldn’t deny the flutter of butterflies in your gut at the sight of him, the way your heartrate picked up as his red eyes met yours.
He’d shot you a boyish grin and unashamedly checked you out, your cheeks flushing with warmth at the lust in his gaze, a hunger that you hadn’t seen in Toji in a very long time. On reflection, Sukuna had always seemed much more attracted to you than Toji had, and his attention had you feeling a little flustered.
The two of you had caught up on a surface level, with Sukuna telling you about his job as a tattoo artist while you gave him a brief update about your new job, opting to leave out the part where you were currently living in a house where your boyfriend would routinely fuck another woman.
Sukuna had always been perceptive though, cutting straight to the chase and asking if you were still together with your asshole boyfriend. So you told him the truth, letting everything spill out as you confessed that Toji had been cheating on you, and that right now you were essentially an unwanted guest in your own house.
You’d feared that Sukuna would laugh at you, call you out for being such an idiot, for believing any of the bullshit that Toji fed you even back in college.
But he did none of that, levelling you with an easy grin as he asked if you’d like a little bit of help getting your own back.
That’s how the two of you ended up on your couch, Sukuna naked beneath you as he guided your hips carefully down to sit you on his cock. It felt like bliss, being stretched out by him again after so long apart. His lips were pressed hard against yours, your fingers digging into his shoulders as he thrust up into you, a muffled moan escaping your lips at the feeling of his tip hitting deep inside you.
You’d had sex with Toji plenty of times on this couch, in this exact position, and yet it never felt as intimate as it did right now with Sukuna’s hands running so tenderly along your waist, holding you with such reverence that you weren’t sure why you’d ever gone back to Toji in the first place.
Not when Sukuna was so capable of treating you like you actually meant something.
He fucked you like he was making up for lost time, losing himself in you completely as he moved you so easily up and down his cock, rasping praise into your ear and telling you that he wished he’d held onto you back in college, that he’d been dreaming for years about having you like this again, and that your boyfriend was such a fucking idiot.
And you found that even though you really did want revenge on Toji, that wasn’t really what this was about anymore. The fact that you were fucking on your ex’s couch became secondary to you, more focussed on the fact that Sukuna’s hands were on you again, and how good that felt.
You were stupid to not realise how much you’d wanted Sukuna back then, how much you still wanted him now. You’d been too caught up in your own little romantic fantasy of marrying your high school sweetheart that you hadn’t realised a better option had been right in front of you.
He made you cum over and over again, a joy that you never really got to experience with Toji - he’d make you cum once and then you’d be done, but Sukuna seemed to have infinite stamina, moving you into position after position until your mind was hazy from pleasure, obsessed with the way that he was making you feel.
Currently he had you in a mean mating press, your legs thrown over his shoulders as he drove his cock as deep into you as it would go, red eyes fixed on yours as he talked you through it, telling you how perfect you were for him, how you were stupid if you thought he was ever letting you go after this.
His words had you cumming around his cock again, squeezing him so tightly as pleasure coursed through you, tears dripping from your lashes as you cried out his name, whimpering about just how good he made you feel.
That was the moment that Toji chose to walk in through the door, bags of grocery shopping dropping to the floor as he snarled out a curse at the sight in front of him, green eyes wide with discontent at being witness to your college fuck-buddy pressing you down on your shared couch, taking what Toji still perceived as being his.
But this time you wouldn’t take his side, wouldn’t send Sukuna away in favor of repairing things with your high school sweetheart. And Sukuna didn’t seem keen on letting you go anyway, tightening his grip on you protectively and letting out a soft chuckle at Toji’s sudden appearance.
His hips didn’t falter, kissing you softly and whispering sweet things in your ear while Toji stood there and watched, seemingly frozen to the spot. It was hot, seeing the look of despair on Toji’s face as Sukuna fucked you into another orgasm. You’d never forget the pain in his eyes as you cried out another man’s name right in front of him, whimpering softly as Sukuna came inside you.
Sukuna acted like Toji wasn’t there, his focus on you as his lips pressed against yours, soft fingers playing with your hair as he slowly pulled out, looking down at you with a shit-eating grin as he loudly commented about how tight you were, how he couldn’t believe that you’d fucked anyone since him.
Toji just about managed to let out a scoff, clearly coming to his senses now as he crossed his arms, glaring down at you and asking just what the fuck you though you were doing fucking another guy in his house.
If Sukuna wasn’t so big and scary perhaps you would’ve felt a little afraid of the look on Toji’s face, the way that his green eyes were narrowed so dangerously at you right now. But Sukuna’s hands against your skin felt safe, comforting. His red eyes were fixed on you reassuringly, filling you with the courage that you’d been lacking since you’d caught Toji cheating on you in the first place.
You peered up at your ex-boyfriend with an innocent look on your face, your vision still a little hazy with pleasure as you gave him a big smile, feeling more free now than you had in all the years that you’d been with him.
“Oh you’re back already? I thought you wouldn’t be home until six.”
a/n: everybody say thank you sukuna!!
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