a cathedral of flesh and fluids

slave to the power of death

[kevendust]

attempted to write a poem/story, wrote this instead.

This is my way of telling you how you’ve created the broken man that lies before you.

I’m a shell.

I’m nothing.

I have no voice.

I have nowhere to run.

There is no trust for anyone.

I’m constantly let down.

No one turns out how I expect.

I’m empty. I’m alone. I’m angry.

I just want to belong. To feel like I belong.

Words mean nothing to me because words are broken.

I want to love, but I don’t know if I have it in me anymore.

I’m never happy anymore.

I’m always depressed or flat out angry.

I have nothing in life. Nothing to live for.

I have no goals anymore. No desire for anything.

Every dream I can remember is a nightmare.

I’m never comfortable. I’m almost always in some form of pain.

I’m too fucked up to date.

I’m too full of hate to love.

My name is Philip Kevin Jackson, I’m 22 years old, and I don’t deserve life.

[kevendust]

jesus someone tell this kid he's fine

and to shut the fuck up

[rickgrimeshappens]

[kevendust]

i fucking love this movie

[rickgrimeshappens]

[kevendust]

Visit Original Link

i haven't shared my music on here in idek how long(i know no one even follows me anymore but still)

[kinkyyybunni-deactivated2025022]

Let me call you a good boy while I jerk you off pls and ty

[kevendust]

probably the most awkward moment in my life happened right after i got my first blowjob

i came and started fingering her again and while i was fingering her there was a knock at my door. i was like “yeah?” and my cousin was like “hey man what’s up?” and i moved to the door and i was like “nothing just watching a movie.” as i turned a movie on quickly. i’m just standing there for a few minutes talking through the door as she’s working to get her pants back on and my cousin goes “you gonna open the door?” and i’m like “yeah in a sec”. she gets her pants on and i open the door and i’m like “heyyy what’s up dude?”

and he was just grinning at me.

i’m sure my face was just like

[kevendust]

where the fuck did i get that picture from LMAO

[kevendust]

in the weeks leading up to this show ABM had a vote on their myspace for who people wanted to win and the singer for light of december started chiming in about how devouring plague wasn’t going to win because we weren’t from the falls and they were and how much better they were than us and blah blah blah

WELL

ONLY ONE BAND WON THE WHOLE THING

I WONDER WHO IT WAS

SAY WHAT?

THE BAND THAT WASN’T FULL OF DOUCHECOCKS?

THE HELL YOU SAY

[kevendust]

this story still really makes me laugh because the dude was SO COCKY.

but it's not even just that, we were literally beloved in wichita falls, not only by the kids coming to the shows, but by the people WHO BOOKED THE SHOWS!!!

we were literally friends with the entire ABM crew. the angry black man himself, chauncey(the guy in the pic with us), was one of the best friends we ever had as a band.

HE PUT ON THE BATTLE

DO YOU REALLY THINK HE WASN'T BIASED TOWARDS HIS FRIENDS??????????

now i ain't sayin we won because of collusion, but it didn't fuckin hurt.

[kevendust]

No Devil Lived On

I searched far and wide to find The shards of my broken mind Before I drowned deep in the sea Of my own endless misery I hoped I’d live to see the dawn Because I knew you would be gone The devil that was killing me It burned away and set me free

[kevendust]

Glass Relationships and Vested Envy

Everything I love was torn away from me I cannot stand to see my face anymore I know I can’t take back what I’ve said Or change what I’ve done I feel it all crumble beneath me I feel it all break away I feel the shame buried inside me I feel the rain washing me away I know I can’t change who you see I know I lost everyone around me This is how it’s supposed to be I am just a tortured soul of envy

[kevendust]

Sol ov Man

A beautiful manifestation of human creation A maggot filled rotting corpse of inspiration The spark of the spirit forged into the beast The soul of the repentant shunned upon release

Dark times are here so they say This won’t be the end There will come a day When you can’t see the light When the sky begins to fall When the blackened veil of death comes to claim us all

Wretched lives filled with ill behavior Their filth spills forth The faithful cry for a savior They’re losing all hope

There’s no waking up from this nightmare The shadows will consume the light No one will save us, no one is there Screams echo all throughout the night

The sun burns out in the end The soul will not ascend The son fades out in the wind The darkness is the end

[kevendust]

Keepsake

I tried to find the words to say To make this seem like it’s easy To let you know that I am sorry To wish you well, I’m finally free

Peace in life is something that I have never felt Never seen, never believed that it was real Always searching for something I could hold on to But never finding the reason to carry me through

What do you see when you look at me? A broken man, tired and afraid I’m desperate for the warmth of my bed I’m longing for the rest from eternal sleep

Every night I shut my eyes and I pray I won’t wake up This life that I fucking despise, it’s not worth the fight

[kevendust]

By None Deemed Necessary

So tragic it seems I have come here today to pay my respects To my hopes and my dreams And all I have lost along the way How would I have known That I could never feel the same And through my failures I have shown That I am incapable of anything

I just want you to see This life of hate I’m living This torment, this misery This pain that’s never ending I know I have let you down And for that I’m sorry But it’s just who I am I’m already lost

Please shed no tears There’s no use in it here Please feel no sorrow For I died long ago

[kevendust]

Haunting the Heart

Take this life away from me I don’t deserve the breath I breathe I tried to tell you it’s the way it’s meant to be I’ll die a thousand times Before I’ll ever see the light And I have failed you once again but I will make it right

It weighs heavy on my soul I have lost all control For the very last time I know what I have to do I just hope it pleases you The gift of death is finally mine

I’ll die a thousand times Before I’ll ever see the light And I have failed you once again but I am making it right

I’m done with suffering Done with the misery I’ll never be the man you wanted of me I lived my life as best I could But it just wasn’t good enough Now it’s my turn to let go and give up

[kevendust]

Progression?

Sitting alone In the dark And the silence It screams in my head

I cry out for someone Save me before it’s done

I just want to understand Why I’ve never seen the light It shines around me all the time But my eyes are blind

Please help me I beg of you I don’t want to be Like this forever

[kevendust]

The Gift

Life spent dreaming about the end I’m so tired of trying to pretend I can’t find the balance, I can’t find my way I don’t know what to do but I know I cannot stay This life isn’t meant for me This pain I cannot heal I’m searching for something I don’t even know is real I wish I could explain all of this to you But I promise you’ll understand when it’s through

[kosmogrl]

[kevendust]

Don't Expect A Happy Ending

My whole life has led up to this Broken and abused Full of shame and emptiness My torment is my existence Nothing helps Nothing makes any difference

I cannot stand the face before me Broken mirrors fill my hell Trapped inside this wretched body Pathetic and frail Quickly losing those around me My flesh bleeds with failure Faced with the reality I'm my own executioner

Pain shapes my being Never healing Pain overwhelming I am drowning

My life holds no allure I can't keep pretending The only thing I know for sure Don't expect a happy ending