onlylonelybhave

i'm 17 years old who attempts to write a blog about my usual and unusual things that happens to me on a daily basis.

[shitboy96]

We really just have to check our inboxes manually every now and then like checking a postbox for letters. Iconic

[kewlchild3]

I'm 18 today and I got my period so damn I be really writing this huh!?

Well im a little bit sad because I couldn't celebrate my bday the way it has to or the way I planned! I really miss my grandmother right now as she passed away this year I really miss her she was there for the last one! We really enjoyed it last year it was so great an environment which was COVID free and tension free actually. My college is there tomorrow and I've got my assignments to do. Since my college just started I don't know many people and they don't know anything about me so it's actually weird. I'm confused in my life doesn't know what im going to do in the future, what kind of adventures are planned for me ahead. A little bit scared and a little excited also. This year has been tough for so many people. On this day I don't want to make this about myself and celebrate I also want to pray for the people who died because of the fires, virus, and other catastrophes. I want to remember my grandmother and thank her for all the years she spent with us, for being a good role model to me and my family.

A VERY VERY VERY HAPPY 18TH BIRTHDAY SAN:)))

[kewlchild3]

YOU CAN DO THIS GIRL!

[kewlchild3]

One of a few people who I follow posted this article about design and its contribution and it somehow fascinated me the way he expressed every terminology in a very subtle way about UI/IX design. As a society, we don't give much importance to design as a career field. We often are behind the most clichéd career paths because every parent is concerned about their child's secure future. Many of the designers do not get the respect that they deserve. The students often get demotivated to opt for this as a career line. Agreed doctors, engineers, CA, etc are a field to respect. Here I am not trying to discriminate between career paths or occupation. Just want to convey don't be behind the obvious things be obvious! Fuck I don't remember any quote. The point being conveyed is basically the tweet that I shared. I write stupid things.

[kewlchild3]

I stopped writing

[kewlchild3]

Man I suck at Tumblr

[rodrickheffeley]

twitter is fun hehehehhe

[rodrickheffeley]

nvm im deleting

[kewlchild3]

I'm a fucking failure

[kewlchild3]

Wish I was pun-ny

[kewlchild3]

Just spent a whole day with relatives now I know why I hate them

[kewlchild3]

Day 12/13 there is nothing to be grateful about

[kewlchild3]

DAY 10/11

Things I'm grateful for

1) I'm grateful because I had "appe" for lunch that was made by my favorite chef-mother.

2) I'm grateful that I'm not giving up on this challenge thanks for the insight will power that I have which is still keeping me up motivatedAlthough I have screwed this little bit yet I'm not giving up bitches

3) I'm grateful today to learn something new which is coding and met interesting people who share the same interest. It pushed me to learn this new subject even more.

4) I'm grateful because I'm finally moved on from my crush. Yes! A crush, it sounds absurd but I'm not a person with so much confidence to show my love to a person who is now in a happy relationship. I'm finally over him yayayayaaa

5) I'm grateful to my reproductive system. I always get my periods on time unlike others who suffer from pcod or PCOS(I'm sorry to anyone who goes through that, I know it must be tough for u)

6) I'm grateful for watching some Bollywood series which ended up me liking the co-star that lead me to my great stalking skills now I'm obsessed with that guy heheh

7) I'm thankful for the mosquitos not entering my room and sulking all the blood from my body and letting me sleep peacefully today.

8) I'm at peace when I listen to folklore album

9) I'm grateful that my aunt and brother are coming to visit us. I hope I have fun.

10) I'm grateful to start this Tumblr account, I got to know about so many stuff.

[kewlchild3]

Every day there are some constant thoughts which keep running in my mind. Those thoughts are always about me and how am I gonna being successful in the future, what is that one X factor that I have which makes me different from the whole crowd and will lead me to the path of success, am I really worth that present? , am I a disappointment to my mother? , am I a failure? , am I gonna live a happy life? Why people and my family keeps calling me a spoiled child where all I got was hate from my own family members, why am I always misunderstood. People misunderstanding me and judging on that misunderstanding makes me angry which people again take it in a wrong way and call it anger/temper issues. I hate this ongoing cycle, which has been happening for a long time. I am tired of these constant thoughts which forces me to compare and to think how big a failure I'm. These thoughts aren't letting me live the way I want. These thoughts are in a constant phase of denial that " girl, it's not your mistake, it's that xyz person's mistake" it's always in the blame game.Maybe I'm in denial because if I let go these thoughts I may discover a person who is the real me and it's very difficult to accept the real me because all this time these thoughts in my head created some different version. The similarity both these versions have is that they both are stewed up and don't know what to do.

[kewlchild3]

DAY 9

Grateful

[kewlchild3]

DAY 8.

Okay, here I am keeping the track of my how to be grateful day.

1) I am grateful that today I had a delicious lunch and dinner.

2) I am grateful for having an earphone. yeah today my elder sister gifted me a brand new earphone since i didnt have one.

3) I am grateful for today because it was an amazing day. 

4) I am grateful for having a drawing book. i like to sketch so its great.

5) I am grateful for my dad who paid for my workshop which i am currently doing.

6) I am grateful for being so privileged that we don’t even give importance. I just realized we always notice  the negative things in our life and we always want more. 

7) I am grateful for being a female. I know we girls always have that point in our life where we faced discrimination and questioned our gender. I AM PROUD FEMALE.

8) I am grateful for everything at this point I really don’t have anything to write.

[no-chill-at-all]

[cheebzandcrackers]

Technology, man. We’ve managed to streamline the process of heartbreak from 5 days to 14 minutes.

[kewlchild3]

DIL BECHARA ISN'T THAT GREAT TO GET A 9.4 IMDB RATINGS.

Movies like the godfather, the fault in our stars (Dil Bechara is the adaption of this movie), shutter island, the notebook (basically the best movie when it comes under romantic genre).

Like I'm shocked how imdb has given so unfair ratings. I wouldn't be surprised if this movie is sent to international film festivals. Indeed, we live in India where we know that nepotism exists only in Bollywood not in any working department like politics, I'm sorry I shouldn't be talking about politics if I did there is a probability of getting raped and death threats from random people so yayayaya Sushant Singh Rajput you did a great job in chichore.

Sorry the appreciation this movie getting is not worth it, I don't even want negative criticism since we should respect the death of that person, but faking the likings towards that film is worse than saying simply the truth. Crying and faking it is too much-”oh god he was my favorite actor and blah blah damn sure you always chose a star kid movie over his films. People are equally responsible for his death. The saying is true dead people receive more flowers than the living ones because regret is stronger than gratitude.

MAKE BOLLYWOOD A PLACE WHERE PEOPLE ACKNOWLEDGE TALENT NOT A STAR KID OR ANY NUISANCE CONTENT FOR THE RECORD.