[kill-nny-the-violence-guy]

WHEELP. Back to the grind. This dusty road ain’t gonna paint itself with blood...

[kill-nny-the-violence-guy]

Gotta step up my game. Modern killers in society are getting way too creative with the whole “Anti-vax” thing. You know a true killer when you see an anti-vaxxer who is also pro-life. Those chardonnay moms just keep poppin ‘em out so they can watch nature take it’s course again and again!

[kill-nny-the-violence-guy]

AU Alfred: So we went looking for the babies. But in six months, we never met anyone who had traded babies with him. One day I saw a baby playing with a baby the size of a baby. The bandit had been throwing the babies away.

[kill-nny-the-violence-guy]

[kill-nny-the-violence-guy]

?!?!? WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN????

Trucker’s academy. I wear a hat and drive a truck now. 

[kill-nny-the-violence-guy]

why.... are you still here?

Because I need validation in the form of costco’s free-samples. This is costco, right?

[kill-nny-the-violence-guy]

To the two gentleman that showed up on my doorstep claiming to be from a television special known as “American Pickers” I’ll part with reverend meat for whatever price you decide so long as it’s no less than 50$ but THE TAXIDERMY RABBIT AND THE VINTAGE CUSTOM-PAINTED DOUGH-BOYS ARE OFF LIMITS!

[kill-nny-the-violence-guy]

this entire blog is CURSED.

[ironic-really]

and everyone’s favorite main, Johnathan Cee. 

[kill-nny-the-violence-guy]

Usually I’m too modest to reblog depictions of me that fit the description of “Artistic nude” but this is a fucking masterpiece.

[kill-nny-the-violence-guy]

 I think I’m just a snowman that melted and all that remains is a skeleton composed of sticks. 

[kill-nny-the-violence-guy]

Be your own best friend. 

[kill-nny-the-violence-guy]

Anyone got a good tutorial for turning a pair of croquet mallets into stilts? Asking for a friend.

[kill-nny-the-violence-guy]

Dear Die-ary: Today I learned I am not a hat person. 

[kill-nny-the-violence-guy]

Dear Die-ary: Today I learned I have no integrity. 

[kill-nny-the-violence-guy]

i have a hat now.

[askdevi-d]

It appears that some noodly loon is back.. I can’t promise that shenanigans won’t be the direct result.

[kill-nny-the-violence-guy]

Shocked to see you’re still among the living!

It’s been a while… 

[askdevi-d]

Implying I should be dead? Are you reverting? I need to find a mirror to bash your head into..

[kill-nny-the-violence-guy]

NO!!! BUT YOU ACTED LIKE YOU WERE!--Then again I kind of did to. I got stuck as the unwilling participant in a sleep-deprivation study for a while. Wasn’t fun. There was free food though so that was a plus even though it was nothing but expired cup-o-noodles. But you know, You are what you eat I guess, and.... I eats what I am and that’s all that I am. So uh. Yeah! What's new in your world?

[kill-nny-the-violence-guy]

I keep waking up in an alternate reality in which my life is a sitcom and I play the role of “Johnny The Wholesome Family Murderer.” You know your sanity is in jeopardy when your nightmares have laugh-tracks. 

[askdevi-d]

It appears that some noodly loon is back.. I can’t promise that shenanigans won’t be the direct result.

[kill-nny-the-violence-guy]

Shocked to see you’re still among the living!

It’s been a while...