Hii Kat, I had a question. It's probably tmi, so if you feel uncomfortable I totally understand and you can just ignore this.
I know you posted about vaginism (?), and I just wondered how you knew you had that. I tried self pleasure and it hurt a bit and after I was bleeding and I was a little shocked.... I thought that could only happen with sex, which was maybe a little naive. anyways you can totally ignore this!
hello dearest!<333 there is no such thing as tmi here lol welcome to the kingkat kingdom
so yeah I've posted about my vaginismus for a while now, and I started posting about it because of exactly this-- starting conversations!! I think it's rlly important to talk about women's pain as well as pleasure, seeing as it's usually hidden or dismissed or not talked about, so ofc love!! I'm here for you, and so are the rest of us girlies here!<3
tbh I always kind of feared that I had vaginismus because when I tried to put a finger inside of myself, it hurt. I remember very specifically trying that when I was 12 (I was a very horny and adventurous kid lol), and I remember having heard that it might hurt the first times, so I believe I anticipated that and clenched myself, which only made it worse... and ever since then, I got rlly anxious around it, and internalised that I should save trying to explore anything inside until I had my first bf because I made up for being afraid of my vagina hurting by telling myself it only meant that my body was keeping me "extra pure" gahhhhhhh poor confused little girl:(
after having gone to pelvic therapy, though, we got to the bottom of why I had vaginismus in the first place-- I was prone to uti's when I was litte, and it hurt to pee sometimes because I had a burning sensation, and I was told by a doctor to drink a lot of water and hold it in my bladder until I couldn't hold it anymore, and that would solve my uti's:/// that is exactly what made my muscles learn to tighten, so that I could hold my full bladder, and it caused my pelvic dysfunction and vaginismus. after we found out about this, and after four different gynaecologists telling me I'd never have sex, I was cured after three sessions of pelvic floor therapy. fucking ridiculous. could've been helped so so so so long ago if people just RESEARCH. WOMEN'S. HEALTH. AND. PAIN. FFSSSSS
SO. what I was getting to, dear, after all my rambling-- there could be a plethora of reasons why it hurt! I don't know how old you are (if you are a minor I'd prefer it if you didn't interact w my content), but I'm answering this because I wish someone had talked to me and explained that there can be many reasons as to why it hurts!
1.) you might not have been aroused enough! were you wet when you tried to insert your finger? you need to be lubricated/wet for things to get in there comfortably; not just a little amount, but I always measure it by 'do I rlly rlly wanna have smth inside of me rn? do I feel like I'm going nuts?' and that's when I know I'm ready and relaxed lol
2.) do you have long nails? you might've nicked the inner lining/skin of your vagina, hence the bleeding. this is not a scary thing, it will heal and u will be fine!<3
3.) you might've caused a little tear in your hymen! some women have a thinner hymen, meaning it is more fragile and can break more easily, hence the blood. again, this is not dangerous, and it is completely normal!
at the end of the day, you are going to be alright, okay?<3 don't continue inserting things into yourself if it hurts though, as your brain will start associating penetration with pain, and that is where it gets rlly tricky:( is this the first time you've had anything inside of you? I suggest you take a little break so that your body can heal, and maybe buy some lube for next time?:) vaginismus is sort of the last thing you should be thinking about, unless this happens every time-- usually it's really hard to get anything in there when you have vaginismus, as your vagina feels very stiff and it has a wall-like feeling, so if you had no problem putting your finger in, then I wouldn't say it's vaginismus! ofc there are different grades of severities, but dw!!! vaginismus is 100% treatable, but since we don't know anything yet, I would say you shouldn't worry<3333
