[ COMFORT ] ;; gimme Reo and Isagi post the NEL when Reo is upset about Nagi ;-;
the shoulder touch -still accepting! @egoistdemon
The field had grown quiet as everyone dispersed, Reo should have followed but he remains rooted to his place. His eyes had long dried out but it still felt surreal, it was all still too raw.
First, he was aware of motion.
Not his own, for he had not a shred of strength left, but the rhythm of quiet unsure strides approaching. Almost as if Reo himself could break at any point, perhaps he could. Perhaps he should but he can't bring himself anymore. It had been building up, this resentment, slowly taking root and unwillingly festering at his core. Easy as it is to give into despair, he wills himself to restrain his thoughts. He's a Mikage, for the better or for worse, he will get what he wants.
His shoulder stiffs to the weight of Isagi's hand and something snaps within.
The tremor starts at the base of his spine, climbs up it's rungs until it settles tightly on closed fists. It takes everything from him to not smack that hand away for deep down he knows the other isn't doing this out of pity. And yet, he feels pitiful himself. His own sorrow broadcasted for the world to see, his dream diminishing with each step Nagi took towards the gate.
"How considerate of you." It's bitter, bitten. This isn't new to them, Isagi had been there back on the second selection as well. Had been the cause of it too. Back then, Reo had swallowed it for the sake of his dream. The notion that he wasn't enough was far more terrifying than whatever Isagi had woken up in Nagi.
Isagi is meant to be the current epitome of what waits for them in the end of Blue Lock. The testament of a true egoist, who will step upon them for that peak. And Reo is meant to allow this. He's meant to let the bodies pile, for as long as he makes it to the team, it shouldn't matter who's left in it's wake. But that had been before this stupid betting system devoured Nagi.
"How does it feel?" He's more angry at the situation than at Isagi but it does not save the other from getting hit. Not when he's thriving from it. "Is it what you were hoping for? The top?"
"Does it feel good? Are you satisfied?"
Still even deep down. He cannot bring himself to fully blame the other, and that's what upsets him the most. The one who ignited Nagi. Had the gall to try and tell him to not quit soccer when he hardly tended to the flame. Had it been Reo would he have said the same?
Again and again he must prove himself in this field, that he has value. That he is capable, that his dream is worth something more than just a whim. And yet, it feels that all he's met with wall after wall is the pitiful platitude of someone who's meant to destroy him. He must really be pathetic to everyone's eyes that even Isagi must come to comfort him. As if he has no pride of his own.
Reo is no quitter. He will see it through. But being forced to do it alone again carries a certain anguish.
It feels empty, dare he admit almost meaningless. But his dream is bigger than Nagi, he must remind himself that. The very words Nagi had told him in the beginning come to haunt him again, how there would be a time they would have to abandon each other. He guesses now he should take them to heart.
"Just leave..." A hand comes to wipe what remains of his tears, he hadn't even realized he'd started crying again. Great. "I'll be better tomorrow...But leave."
