( if this is love then why does it feel like war ? ) she thinks , doe eyes stuck in the headlights of his words. a lump grows and hardens in her throat. he’s not untruthful , there’s no falsities in the statements. perhaps that’s why she despises it so. to be told she’s one in the same as ransom in any capacity draws blood like barbs , but attaching that word––– love , stings extra.
to love ransom is to accept the lies she tells of how she could never love someone so awful ( or whatever other insulting adjective she uses on any given day ) is only true in the labels she places on him. therefore maybe , just maybe , the fiction of love is the truth of their lies. she clenches her jaw.
❛ is this some manipulate , mansplain , manslaughter way of trying to get me back ? because if so , you should know that you’re shit at it. ❜ arms fold across her chest , almost in a hug , a subtle self–soothing. ❛ i’m nothing like you. and i don’t love you. you’re incapable of love. ❜ ah , there it is again. truth behind thinly veiled lies.
brunette can’t stop his eyes from rolling . of course . truly , shouldn’t be surprised about her reaction , should have seen it coming . maybe he did . but maybe it needed to be said out loud , finally needed it off his chest . had never minded being looked down on , never minded that he was underestimated – trust fund baby stamp bright red on his forehead . all those accusations spoken , all the insults and all the belittling , none of it news and yet ... even though she refused to acknowledge her own faults , own mistakes , the two of them so alike . so similar . no matter how badly she pretended to be different to him , better than him: in the end they had mastered playing the game of finding words and actions that’d hurt the other the most and still find a way to make them stay .
huffing unimpressed , ransom shakes his head slightly . “ see , this is where we’re not alike , jackie . i know who i am but you’re still too arrogant to admit that ... you’re not any better than i am . “ ah , and there it was . the low blow . of course . she missed no chance of throwing it at him . heart crippled , years and years of being deprived of love and care leading him to being ignorant to what love could be . what it could feel like . how it could change him for the better . no . there was no room for love in his life . waste of time when it was taken from him each time that he’d tried giving it a chance .
“ you’re stupid if you really think that . “ was it not love wanting nothing more than to put the fight aside for now ? was it not a type of love that he hoped one day she’d be capable of accepting that they were similar enough to be more than occasional fuck and fight buddies ? not even buddies at this point . just ... something in between lovers and enemies . “ and your life would be a lot easier if you’d just admit that you miss me . it’d also be a lot sexier . just saying . come on , just forget about it , huh ? wasn’t all bad with us , was it ? “ disgustingly trying to weasel his way back to her side , an eyebrow raised at her to get a reaction that’d give him an opening . they’d be one again ... because they always did . always fixed it . always . / @nofinalgirl·