Bitch Dont Kill My Vibe. ✌🏽

All of my experience life.

[kolc0mized]

Lmao! After I read the previous post so end up this girl has been ghosted on me after came back from Florida vacation so it said all of her true color and I ain’t chasing no body so I don’t chase , I attract therefore it will come to me somehow. I’m 100% done with dating apps shit so all I do is let the fate or universe to make it happen for me because right now I’m focus on me and my furbabies and trying to finish my college to get my AAS degree.

Anyways….. the Labor Day weekend was the most unbelievable experience ever I had which it’s good thing thou!!

But why I always attract to fragile girls when they haven’t healing from the previous relationship ? I mean I met a right girl but wrong time. The struggle is real.. 😒😒

[kolc0mized]

Well well!! After reading all of old posts....lets say this..

What the fuck wrong with me?! 🤣🤣 clearly it's me that is blind af that I should not be with my ex of 8 yrs and I'm more than glad to throw into the trash because I found out lots more info that I expected..... So here it goes Into trash for good. I admit that I have no feeling for her anymore it's all gone... Bland gone....

Anyways.... This summer is my fuckin’ summer! I owe myself for this! I have wonderful friends who will babysitter my fur babies while I'm gone.

Being single is fun thou but my heart has been taken for this girl. Enough said. :)

[kolc0mized]

Sighs... It's Thursday so I had no class since it got cancelled so my friends and I went to the pumpkin patch and it was fun but it has been remind me with lots of memory of Janet and I that made an annual of going to pumpkin patch or apple picking...

Honestly, it's so hardest than I thought... Normally I don't get drunk at pumpkin patch but I did that because I wanted to numb this feeling since it's so funny hurt so bad, also knowing this that she just blind AF with that punk ass idiot that kept coming back to her ex while she hang out with Janet.... I mean I started to feel sorry for her for so dumb. I have so much of mixed or confused feeling as she want to throw 8 yrs of ours... I just lost of words right now.

[kolc0mized]

From on, everytime I got feeling so I'm gonna write this down. To express out of my feeling and my thoughts.

I still have hard time to believe that she wanted to back with me but I always has been told her that she need to love herself before she love someone else. It's a key to find the confidence in her..

Right now I just literally lost my focus because of this. I has been cried all night and morning and my eyes are so exhausted, my feeling and thoughts are so mixed it up to make it worst out of me. The most that i wanted is to see her action to make move as own it up and tell truth that's it. I don't give a shit if she's talking to other girls but I has to found out like that which its killing me more. I actually though I can move on but definitely CANNOT move on at all. I actually deleted all of three dating apps because I kept thinking about her only her! What's more? She kept assuming that I'm seeing anyone which I'm not.. So she does good job that she got me deeply in love with her which that's something that cannot move on.

Honestly.... I don't even know what to do. I feel I'm completely loat. 💔

[iglovequotes]

https://iglovequotes.net/

[sapphetti]

At the Moulin Rouge: Two women waltzing (1892) by Henri de Toulouse-Lautrec

[wander-luster7]

Reblog if you’re into girls✌🏼🏳️‍🌈

[iglovequotes]

https://iglovequotes.net/

[kolc0mized]

I'll waiting for you till someone find me.

[positivelypastelpink]

You are worthy of good 🎀

[iglovequotes]

https://iglovequotes.net/

[kolc0mized]

I gotta to stop thinking so much abt her and her fully answer but unfortunely I won’t get right answer or whatever so I gotta to move on same time waiting for her as always. From on by this... I’ll stay single rest of my life. I’m tired of being hurting or lost or the one who always first one to broke up with a person that I truly loved and last one as well. Always forgive yourself before others as if you don’t then how can you fix yourself if you don’t forgive yourself. So forgive yourself first. I’m glad that I forgave myself as last summer 18’. So that’s all I can say abt it.

❤️

[kolc0mized]

[kolc0mized]

Starting doubtful about you....

Don’t get me wrong but after what you did to me was absolutely hurtful and careless like ALWAYS.... there are so much to say to you but I just can’t because I know you don’t care and don’t give a shit how I feeling so you tend to care abt you and as I see is you using me as like you used J.chavez like you told me about it so it’s same idea that you did to her as you doing that to me: so only thing I’m glad is I’m not like you as you did to me and other horrible like using us as money, take care of you and everything so all I asked is one thing from you and you STILL made millions excuses, don’t even bother to make another way like I did... I always make another way for YOU, why? Because I LOVE YOU! And as I see you ain’t love me then say it in my face so I’ll damn make sure that I’ll stop take care of you and everything because it’s really troll on me and it’s hard and when I think abt you and I hate it that I still love you since you still hurting me in so many way like don’t give shit abt my health issue that’s pretty number one of priority myself. That’s reason why I broke up with you because of that and there are so much more reasons. I only hurt you once which it’s bad one but thinking about it you hurt me in MILLIONS of time and I still stay side with you and forgave you because I could have left you when you hit the phone on my head and bleed out of my head. I still forgave you. So right now I’m on between of the fence about you.... I had a guts feeling is you don’t love me any more but more of using me and use me for pleasure. I don’t use you at all I CARE about you...I’m not going to tell you what I wanted or think or whatever all I wanted is be there for me and caring abt my health issue. So it doesn’t mean that I’ll leave you again but you made THAT happened cuz you chose to be Douchebag to me when I was gasped for some breath. It’s not ducking first time at all so Right now im completely lost of words about you and your behavior... it’s just suck that you still carry the past which I can’t deal with this anymore because I put the past in the trash because I don’t want to remember or memory of that at all so it’s all gone. Because I forgave myself for what I have done, would I do that again ? Never again I already made the pact myself is self care period. I’m done for now. I just hope that you would read this but I don’t think so anyways.....

Much love,

Krystal

[kolc0mized]

Can’t stop thinking about you.

Yes you hear me right.. it’s has been like two months since I cut you off for a reason and for your own Goddamn sake... but shit its hardest than I thought because I had been thinking about you like everyday as non stop. Most of them were good memories of course I could careless about memories because I know I forgave you all of that. So it’s been crazy month in this month which it’s bad month for me so it was troll on me so badly but I ain’t let it get me at all because of my Tito’s final word that does hit me hard even more... that’s reason why I finally discover of myself and being happy abt myself... as if it wasn’t for him then I’ll have hard time to figure it out by myself but yeah his death was impact on me included my family and I never thought I’ll actually reunion with my real father again so I moved on and forgive my dad because I don’t want to go Thur like my cousin that haven’t seen or talk to my Tito so it’s stuck on her and got her regret for what she has done or Tito has done wrong but it’s just crazy to see all of my father’a side family because I haven’t seen them like forever and they kept said I look like my grandma so I wish I could remember her but I don’t so anyways the point is that Forgive someone is the best cure to do and it does lift it up too so that’s why I already forgave you even thought you called me a whore... that’s shit got me laugh hard because I never had been called a whore ever so good job... but I just wish you find the courage to forgive but it’s about time and heal...lots of girls has been hitting on me but I always said I still have a feeling for you. So they actually respected me that even I haven’t do someone either so I just can’t do that because I know I feel something but I just gotta to wait patiently so as I know you don’t even want to talk or anything , I understand that but all I can is wish you the best and whatever you do right now I hope you can figure yourself somehow which I know you will. ❤️❤️

[kolc0mized]

Free yourself from your past mistakes By forgiving yourself for what you’ve done or went through. Everyday is another chance to start over. ❤️💋

#girls who like girls #anotherchance #freeyourself #chicago #singlebuthearttaken

[kolc0mized]

“ be strong, Live your life.” - Tito Santos Cartagena ❤️

[kolc0mized]

Today is the day....

Okay right now I’m laying down in my bathtub and continue crying since last night... all I want is a comfort hug from someone who I truly love eventhought she’s such a jerk but only I want a hug but it’s fine anyways it’s today is my Tito’s service so it’s gonna be super wrecking for me to see all of my Cartagena, Cruz, and Lopez family..... I haven’t seen my deadmeat dad for like almost 11 years... I’m super wreck nervous to see him eventhough I don’t want to see him but I gotta to do this for my Tito’s and reminder me of his last words to me......💔💔