Hey so this is a beta!Komaeda rp blog. All my sprites are edited by me, so if they look crappy, I'm sorry. This is the first time really edit sprites. Beta!Komaeda's original title was supposed to be SHSL Shinigami, so that will be the main difference between this Komaeda and others. Also, beta!Komaedas first name is changed from Nagito to Nagisa so there is less confusion and stuff. (Will be crack rp at times) I also run monitoringtwins and my personal is monerdooweenie I except Magic Anons Current Magic Anon: N/A
ok, so now that im done with this blog, id like to thank all the ppl ive rped with and all my followers. uve all been rly great and i rly appreciate u all! also, i will not delete this blog, mostly bc, even tho its over, i have a lot of sentimental feelings towards it. this was my first rp blog and ive met so many great ppl. if it werent for this blog or for u all supporting me, i probably would have never rped again. i had doubts, i rly did, but u all made me feel better. so thank u, ilu all, and have a nice night. O3O)/)
since i wont be using this blog to rp anymore, im going to put an ending up v. soon. u can unfollow if u want, but pls see the ending first, i worked rly hard on it. thank u!
Tick tock went the clock as he sat there with the time flying by slower than ever. He wasn’t waiting for anything. There was nothing to wait for. Perhaps waiting for Death? Hah. How funny is that? He quietly laughed to, or rather at, himself for even thinking such a silly thing. His laugh was hoarse and cold, beaten down with barely anymore energy to give. His eyes were nearly the same, hiding behind the glass frames that were now fogging up. He didn’t bother to wipe them, it’s not like there was anything interesting or new to see.
And yet, he could see it all now. He was once blind, the blindest man on earth, but after all that he went through; he could finally see everything he was ever curious about. Every question he had ever asked had been answered, and he’d realized that this whole time, he’s been living a lie. He didn’t really know which one he would have preferred at this point. The ugly truth or a beautiful lie?
Some people say that Death is an ugly truth. Komaeda disagreed with that. Death was the release of a stressful lie, a lie so big, so terrible, that it could not help but be passed on and take over. He had enough experience in it. Oh, so much experience. He’d learned so much.
Maybe it would have been better if he stayed naïve and curious rather than wise and in despair like he was now. Everything had fallen apart. The only people he ever truly cared for were all gone now. They either forgot about him, passed on when he couldn’t follow, or both. He wondered if they were happy now. He wondered that a lot. In fact, that was mostly the only thing on his mind, other than his job of course.
He sometimes imagined what it would be like to see them all again. His fantasies were all nearly the same. He would show up and they would all be so surprised. They’d all ask things like “Where have you been?!” “How did you get here?!” “Do you have any idea how much we missed you?!” Then Komaeda would share the details of how he got there, if he ever did, and how much he loved them. He would cry, and so would they, and they’d all hug each other. They’d all bask in each other’s warmth, the warmth he’s been missing for so long. One of them, the one who once said his hair resembled cotton candy, would ask if he’s been taking care of his hair, and he would say no, and then they’d get a little bit mad. But that’s ok, because he knew that they would get over it soon. Then they would all laugh and enjoy their day.
If only.
Komaeda‘s memory started to fail him. As much as he tried, he could not picture any of their faces. All he knew was that there was one boy with a red and gray eye, there was another boy multicolored hair, and that there was a girl with bangs covering one eye. Those were the most detailed parts. Everything else was fuzzy, even their names.
But maybe it was good that he would forget. Maybe it was for the best that he threw all these petty emotions and memories away so he would no longer have to suffer. They were all leaving him anyway; why not make the best of it?
It’s been getting harder to breathe.
Every time he inhaled, his lungs would start to hurt, and when he exhaled, he felt like he was suffocating. He had to do something about this, but what could one silly Shinigami do? He was a dark creature, not meant to have the luxury of resting. His purpose was to collect souls for the rest of his never ending life, and that was all.
Then he had an idea. If any Shinigami had a problem, they would address it to their boss. While he was a God of Death, his boss was The God of Death. After finding a way to contact them, the almighty god summoned the insignificant being.
“What do you wish to speak to me about?” Its voice was thundering, not sounding human at all. Komaeda made an effort not to tremble in its presence.
“I wish to rest.” He made his point nice and clear, loudly and confidently, which earned him a roaring laugh coming from the other.
“Do you really wish to toy with me, minion? You are not allowed to do such a thing, and you know that very well.”
“I do not care. I need to rest.” He figured he had nothing else to lose, so he would stick it to them.
“You do not, and be careful with what you say to me.”
“I do. And I intend to do so, with or without your permission.” He stood strong, something he hadn’t done in a while.
“YOU HAVE NO AUTHORITY TO DO SUCH A THING!” Its eyes were flaming; he was appalled that someone would actually have the audacity to defy him like this.
“But what if I got someone to replace me?” Usually, Komaeda would rather sacrifice himself than have others suffer the same fate he did. Today though, he had enough. He’d done his work, he’d done it well, and he would not continue it. Let somebody else learn all of this, just like he did. Let someone else have so little to lose that they would dare speak to their boss this way. Let someone else deal with the pain. Someone else but him. He just wanted to rest, that was all.
“Hm… Very well, if you bring someone else here to me by the end of the day, I shall grant you your wish.” The god did not want to lose anyone, but if they simply replaced them, it would be no trouble at all. They sent off the boy in the search for a new victim.
Komaeda didn’t have a hard time finding someone. A Shinigami becomes one by dying too early, so he just had to kill someone who was not supposed to die yet. Would they leave their families? Maybe. Would they get seriously injured and left begging for mercy? Perhaps. It didn’t matter. All he had to do was find one person, just one, and he would be home free.
He chose a young man who looked to be about his age, maybe a little bit older. With his special abilities, he was able to easily lure the boy into his own death. An easy kill. Presenting the brand new Shinigami to his boss, Komaeda was sent off. He was pointed to a room, where he walked in, and there it was. The Stairway to Heaven.
Taking his first few steps, Komaeda realized what he’d just done. Oh, no no no, did he really just take someone’s life for his own selfish reasons? He just ruined that man’s life! He didn’t deserve to go to heaven, he didn’t deserve anything. Still, his feet did not stop moving. Although his mind was telling him no, his heart was encouraging him to go on. Did he really want freedom this badly? It seemed that way.
Getting closer and closer to the door at the top, he felt his heart pounding faster and faster, and he began running up to his new destination. Opening the door, the tears started to fall down his cheeks, and a smile appeared on his face. There they were, everyone he cared for who had died.
He rushed to them and his memory was renewed. All their faces were so clear! He’d never seen anything more beautiful in his life! All of them were surprised to see his face, and they too began to cry. They all hugged and laughed and asked the same questions they did in his fantasies.
Then a specific person, the one who called his hair cotton candy at one time, ruffled his white hair and asked him, “So how’s the hair?”
Komaeda shed a few more tears before answering, “I haven’t washed it since you left, Mondo.”
Instead of getting mad, Mondo just embraced Komaeda so tightly, it almost hurt. But it hurt in a good way. “I wouldn’t expect anythin’ different comin’ from you, pal.”
Komaeda returned the hug, and hoping to never let go. This was what he’s been waiting for nearly his entire life. This is what he wanted.
i love it when its just a happy fluffy moment between me and my friends
that usually means that there will be something not so fluffy happening to me soon to pay for that oops
i love it when its just a happy fluffy moment between me and my friends that usually means that there will be something not so fluffy happening to me soon to pay for that oops
i love my blog sometimes because at the same time that souda is confessing to sonia im over with krispy and sauvy and chihiromun talking (in some form between bouts of laughter) about whose muse has the biggest advantage and unanimously agreeing chihiro does because internet and oh my god i love...
There is a rilakkuma condom. Right when I think it’s all fluffy and cute and then there’s a naked girl tearing a packet with her teeth
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Edit: these are my friend’s thoughts on it.
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Edit (again): More thoughts im crying.
